“Our vision is so limited we can hardly imagine a love that does not show itself in protection from suffering. The love of God is of a different nature altogether. It does not hate tragedy. It never denies reality. It stands in the very teeth of suffering. The love of God did not protect His own Son. The cross was the proof of His love – that He gave that Son, that He let Him go to Calvary’s cross, though “legions of angels” might have rescued Him. He will not necessarily protect us – not from anything it takes to make us like His Son. A lot of hammering and chiseling and purifying by fire will have to go into the process” (Elisabeth Elliott).

Pain isn’t always bad. Sometimes pain means that healing is taking place. Those with broken bones can attest that while the breaking of the bone is painful, so is the healing of the break. But while neither is pleasant, the pain of healing must take place for there to be mending, or else the bone stays broken.

We are the same way. We’re broken. God is healing us. There’s pain involved in that process, but it’s better than the pain of remaining broken. And sometimes for a bone to set and heal properly, it has to be re-broken so it will mend properly.

If you want the ultimate picture of suffering in love, look at Jesus. God did not spare Jesus one moment of suffering, but He instead spared us from the worst of it. While we still undergo pain, God made sure that the worst of it fell on Jesus. He went through hell so we won’t have to. That’s love.

On a side note, parents that never allow their children to suffer or even be inconvenienced aren’t necessarily doing them any favors. Just as the butterfly’s struggle to emerge from the cocoon strengthens its wings to fly, so children struggle to become adults who are strong enough to think and live apart from their parents and on their own.

And for the record, I don’t believe the idea that God never gives us more than we can handle. He never gives us more than He can handle. Sometimes, it’s more than we can bear on our own, so we’re forced to rely on the God who made us to sustain us. That’s when we become more like Jesus.