I’m no expert on love. At least not the romantic kind.

I do think that while movies often get love wrong, sometimes they hit the nail on the head when it comes to what true love really looks like.

In Stardust, one of the main characters talks about love. She says that true love is unexpected, uncontrollable, and very often can be mistaken for loathing. I don’t know about that.

She also says that true love should be unconditional. You shouldn’t have to earn it or prove it. I think she’s right.

True love is when someone loves you for just you. Not who you might one day become or who you hope to be. True love doesn’t wait until you measure up or get all your flaws fixed.

I know enough to know that love isn’t all moonlit walks on the beach and candlelight dinners. Love is work, because love is an active verb that requires action. Love transcends emotions and does the best for the beloved, regardless of whether it feels like it or not.

Love is God becoming a man to take my place in a punishment my sins deserved to die a death that should have been mine. Love says that I was worth it. Love not only said it, but backed it up on a cross.

Sometimes, love isn’t pretty. Sometimes, love means laying down your life for someone else. Even if that means a gory death on an instrument of torture. We romanticize Jesus’ death on the cross to make it more palatable, but it was anything but. It was messy, it was shameful, it was horrific.

And it was for us. That’s the ultimate example of true unconditional love that has been or ever will be.

That’s the kind of love I want to receive. That’s the kind of love I want to show.