Some days, I feel like I have it all together. Then there are other days where I’m likely to stick my car keys in the fridge or look for my cell phone using my phone as a flashlight. Usually, there’s no in between for me.
Most days, I’m thankful that the security of my salvation doesn’t rest with me, or I’d lose it. In every sense of the word. If salvation was something I could lose, I would have already lost it long ago.
But I believe that my eternal security doesn’t lie in my firm hold on God but in His firm grip on me. He’s the One not letting go. He’s the One who is forever faithful to His promises to finish what He started in me. He’s the One who speaks of my future as if it’s already a done deal. And it is because God says so.
I see a lot of posts from believers on social media about how strong they are and how they’re the storm and how Satan better not mess with them. All I know is that when it comes to matters of faith, I’m not self-reliant at all; I’m completely God-reliant. Every day, I make a declaration of dependence that I need God as much as I did the day before — and perhaps even more. I’m as prone to wander as ever, as prone to leave the God I profess to love. Only God can take my heart and seal it and keep it tender instead of it hardening to stone.
Christians aren’t perfect. They’re far from it. At least if they’re honest. It’s too bad that the current climate in most churches won’t allow for admissions of weakness and failure because it keeps believers thinking they have to wear a mask.
This one isn’t the one mandated by the CDC. This one has a fake smile and a response of “I’m fine” to everyone who asks how you’re doing. This one tells everyone that you’ve got it all together and you don’t need any help from anyone at anytime ever. This one keeps people living the lie that they’re the only ones who struggle or the only ones with private sins they’re too shamed to confess or who feel like failures in matters of faith.
The more you understand that salvation is entirely from God and even the faith to believe is a gift from God, the more you can feel free to take that mask off. The more you can be free to be your authentic broken self and confess your frailties because you know that’s where healing and restoration come from. The more you free others to feel welcomed as they are and discover a God who can meet them there and make them who they were always meant to be.
My hope isn’t in my own faith. It’s not in my goodness or my faithfulness or my generosity or the size of my heart toward others. It’s in the God who is the strength of my heart and my portion forever, the One who sustains and guides and renews me. The One who is my righteousness and my goodness and my intercessor and my hope forever.