I don’t have a daughter. I do have a cat. But that aside, I do think there’s some real merit to what Brant Hansen, a Christian radio personality, wrote. Here are his words that I think everyone, women and men alike, should read. If you have a daughter, you will appreciate these words, but I think that just about everyone can take away something to apply from this:
“1. He takes responsibility
He’s not an excuses guy. He doesn’t run away from his own mistakes. He doesn’t see himself as a victim. This, to me, is the essence of masculinity.
There’s a word for a man who will not take responsibility: A child.
2. He practices self-denial
This can be shown in many ways: He can successfully work a job he doesn’t like. He shows discipline with his money. Or – how about this: He listens to people even when they’re not talking about something he enjoys.
3. He doesn’t respond in anger
Some men think acting in anger is a mark of manliness. Quite the opposite is true. Self-control, perspective, and forgiveness are marks of strength.
4. He gives attention, respect, and kindness to NON -attractive females
A very important, related question: How does he treat people who can do nothing for him?
If he tends to ignore (or mocks) them, you’re very possibly dealing with a narcissist. Run away. Now.
5. His instinct is to protect, not hurt
He doesn’t take advantage of you when you’re weak.
And when he encounters the vulnerable… he doesn’t make fun of them. He defends and befriends them… even when no one’s looking.
By the way: Even if a man seems ‘church impressive’, check for this stuff. Being on stage, leading worship, talking a great Christian game, being admired in public, leading a ministry – that’s neato.
But it has nothing to do with being a great husband.”