writing

Summer Already?

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Even though it doesn’t officially start for three weeks, I think summer has arrived. That makes a lot of people very happy. That makes a few people sad. That makes me want to stay inside where the air conditioning lives.

I do like summer, but it’s not the same as when I was a kid. Back then, summer meant freedom. It meant no more teachers, no more books, and definitely no dirty teacher looks for three months. That was the best part of the season for me.

Now it just gets super hot for a long time. I still have to go to work every morning. Nothing much changes for me except that traffic gets a little more bearable with schools being out and so many people on vacation.

But as I’ve gotten older, I’ve come to appreciate all the seasons. Each plays a part in the cycle of life that God designed so long ago. Each has its own value and also helps us appreciate the other seasons a little more.

My favorite is still fall, but I want to learn how to savor summer. I don’t want to waste it by waiting for the next season and not fully appreciating the present one. These days, I try to look at it like I don’t have to go to work but I get to. I understand that each new day is a gift, not an obligation.

Will I still complain about the heat and humidity? Absolutely. That’s what I do in the summer. I sweat and whine and talk about how I can’t wait for fall, but secretly I’m a fan of summer because of the long days and the beautiful sunsets and all the smells of fresh cut grass and growing life that come with the season.

Bring on summer! I’m ready for it!

Reason to Sing

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As you may or may not be aware, I have music perpetually playing in my head all the time. I mean All. The. Time. Like from the moment I wake up until the moment I finally fall asleep. Every now and then, I have a random song that I haven’t heard in a while that sneaks into my mental playlist. Or sometimes I think God puts a song in my mind that speaks above the volume of everything else.

One song, Reason to Sing, is from the group All Sons and Daughters. The confessional lyrics are raw and honest in a way that most current worship music is not. I believe it’s from 2013, so it’s not ancient or really all that old, but the lyrics speak a timeless truth to all those feel like lives shattered on the floor. I hope it will speak to you as it has spoken to me over the years:

“When the pieces seem too shattered
To gather off the floor
And all that seems to matter
Is that I don’t feel You anymore
No I don’t feel You anymore

I need a reason to sing
I need a reason to sing
I need to know that You’re still holding
The whole world in Your hands
I need a reason to sing

When I’m overcome by fear
And I hate everything I know
If this waiting lasts forever
I’m afraid I might let go
I’m afraid I might let go oh

Will there be a victory?
Will You sing it over me now?
Your peace is the melody
With You sing it over me now?

I need a reason to sing
I need a reason to sing
I need to know that You’re still holding
The whole world in Your hands
That is a reason to sing

I will sing, sing, sing to my God my King, ‘fore all else fades away;                                       
I will love, love, love with this heart in me, for You’ve been good always” (Leslie Jordan, David Leonard, Alli Rogers © 2011 Integrity’s Praise! Music/BMI and Integrity’s Alleluia! Music/SESAC (both adm at EMICMGPublishing.com), and Simple Tense Songs/ASCAP CCLI # 6092351).

Christmas with the King

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I ran across a Christmas poem that resonated with me deeply. This year, I have known people who have lost loved ones. I was blessed to be a part of a crew of deacons that went caroling Sunday at the homes of a couple of our widows.

This poem speaks to the Christmas experience of those who are no longer here with us. I think they’re probably having their best Christmas season ever. And the good news is that for them it never ends.

“Martha Bennett sent us this encouraging poem in a Christmas Card. Thanks Martha, Thanks for your encouragement.

I’m spending Christmas with Jesus this Year

I see the countless Christmas trees
Around the world below
With tiny lights like heavens stars
Reflecting on the snow

The sight is so spectacular,
Please wipe away that tear.
For I’m am spending Christmas
With Jesus Christ this year.

I hear the many Christmas songs,
That people hold so dear.
But the sound of music can’t compare,
With the Christmas Choir up here.

For I have no words to tell you,
The joy their voices bring,
For it is beyond description,
To hear an angel sing.

I can’t tell you of the splendor,
Or the peace here in this place.
Can you just imagine Christmas,
With our Savior face to face?

Please let your hearts be joyful,
And let your spirit sing.
For I am spending Christmas in heaven,
And walking with the King!”

As Billy Graham said that when you hear he had died, it was not true. He had simply changed his address. That’s true for all those we love who aren’t here this year. They’ve simply changed their address, and their faith has been made sight.

CAFO2024

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Sometimes, you can go back. Almost.

This time, it was the Christian Alliance for Orphans (or CAFO) conference held at Brentwood Baptist Church. It was basically 13 years after the first time I volunteered for a CAFO conference.

I truly believe that if you are pro-life, you are pro-adoption and pro-fostering. The best way to show that we care for unborn babies is to keep caring for them once they’re born, especially if they’re born into unfortunate circumstances.

One of the few upsides of being unemployed is that I now have the free time to volunteer. I can be a part of something that’s bigger than me and make a difference (and possibly turn it into a career down the road). While that last part isn’t exactly super realistic, it’s not impossible.

One of my favorite parts so far is seeing the incredible diversity of the people who are attending. It’s like a small taste of heaven where there will be people from every tribe, tongue, ethnicity, race, and nation represented and bound together in worship to Jesus.

I’ve heard that one of the best ways to deal with stress/trauma/grief is to go and do for others. One of the best kinds of therapy is to serve others as a way of taking your mind off your own world for a bit. I’m not saying every single person is 100% ready nor that serving will make all your problems magically go away, but it does give a bit of perspective to step outside of yourself for a bit.

For me, the motivation is partly to recapture some of the magic from last time. I also believe in what CAFO is doing around the world. I also can’t think of a better way to spend my time.

This is not a humble brag about how great and selfless I am, but really a shameless plug for CAFO and an encouragement for you to go and find a place to serve not to get anything out of it but because of the joy of serving and most of all because God is worth it.

Fear

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“It is said that before entering the sea
a river trembles with fear.

She looks back at the path she has traveled,
from the peaks of the mountains,
the long winding road crossing forests and villages.

And in front of her,
she sees an ocean so vast,
that to enter
there seems nothing more than to disappear forever.

But there is no other way.
The river can not go back.

Nobody can go back.
To go back is impossible in existence.

The river needs to take the risk
of entering the ocean
because only then will fear disappear,
because that’s where the river will know
it’s not about disappearing into the ocean,
but of becoming the ocean” (Khalil Gibran).

I’ve learned over the years that all fear is just looking at the future and seeing the mountain but not the Mountain Mover. It’s seeing the stormy waves but not seeing the One who walks on water. It’s basically looking at life’s problems and eliminating God from the equation.

I’ve also learned that 98% of what I worry about never happens. That dreaded scenario never takes place. I find that when I get to the place where my fear is greatest . . . and take one more step, that’s when God’s strength shows up in my weakness. God’s faithfulness shows up in my obedience, regardless of whether my motives are wholly pure or not.

“Jesus Christ is like a vast ocean, He is too immense to fully explore, and too rich to fathom. You are like a bottle. The wonder of the gospel is that the bottle is in the ocean, and the ocean is in the bottle” (Jesus Manifesto, Leonard Sweet and Frank Viola).

My 5,000th Blog Post!

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“The more comfortable we are with mystery in our journey, the more rest we will know along the way” (stolen from a friend’s post).

I never thought when I started out on my WordPress journey almost 14 years ago that I would make it this far. Honestly, I had no long term plan when I wrote that first blog post way back in July 2010. I just knew this was a way to get my thoughts out of my head and if not on paper then out into the ether.

I am grateful for every single person who has read my writings over the years. I am blessed to know that people support me in this and in so many other ways. I can say with certainty that my life has not gone the way I expected in these 14 years, and that’s okay.

God knows. I can be comfortable with the mystery in my journey because I know not a bit of it is a mystery to God. He sees the end just as clearly as He sees the beginning. And He sees every little detail in between. I can rest in God’s control over my life.

Does this mean the writing journey is at an end? Hardly. I hope, God willing, to get to 10,000 posts and beyond. I hope that I will keep getting better and better at this and my words will keep blessing as many people as those who have blessed me.

Stay tuned. There will be another post tomorrow.

Old School CCM

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Maybe this makes me super old, but old music just sounds better. It sounds like real people playing real instruments and singing with real voices.

I grew up on 80s and 90s music, but if you want to get me started and never shut up, start talking to me about 80s and 90s Contemporary Christian Music. Mention artists like Kim Hill, Steven Curtis Chapman, Susan Ashton, PFR, dc talk, Julie Miller, Rich Mullins and so many of those others.

I’m pretty sure I’d win a trivia contest based off of old-school CCM. Or at least I’d know some of the answers.

One of my favorite artists from back when was Julie Miller. She had a unique sound and voice and could write songs like nobody else. Probably my favorite of hers is a song called “Nobody But You.” It’s so honest and transparent and true. Here are the lyrics:

“I have seen the night of a million tears
I have seen an angel’s smile
I have come of age and remained, these years
With the longings of a child

Nobody but you can find my heart
Nobody but you sees in the dark
Nobody but you can call my name and scatter all my pain

I have had the fears of an orphaned heart
I have had a homeless soul
I have been embraced in the arms of grace
You have brought my spirit home

Nobody but you can find my heart
Nobody but you sees in the dark
Nobody but you can call my name and scatter all my pain

Nobody but you can find my heart
Nobody but you sees in the dark
Nobody but you can call my name and scatter all my pain

Nobody but you, nobody but you
Nobody but you, nobody but you
Nobody but you, nobody but you
Nobody but you” (Julie Miller).

Boxen

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I started a new book recently. I’ve actually owned this book for a while, but for some reason or another have never gotten around to it. It was perpetually on my to-read-next list.

This is a collection of what C. S. Lewis, who preferred to be called Jack, wrote with his brother Warnie when they were kids growing up in Belfast in Northern Ireland. It wasn’t something they ever meant to be published but it was stories they wrote for each other to take their minds off of the outside world and losing their mother at an early age.

It feels a bit like the Beatrix Potter books (which they read as kids) where the animals wear clothes and talk and behave in human ways. If you’ve read the Narnia books, you can see where the seeds that led to those books came from.

These stories have typical childish spelling and grammar, but also they seem a bit advanced for children who were both under the age of 10. You can tell both these boys were intelligent and well-educated. I feel like these characters could have easily existed in the world that Kenneth Grahame created for The Wind in the Willows (which is a story that he also never originally meant to be published but wrote for his young son).

I’ve included a link to Amazon if you’re interested (although I think you could probably find it cheaper in a secondhand bookstore or through other book websites):

A Writer’s Advice

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“And by the way, everything in life is writable about if you have the outgoing guts to do it, and the imagination to improvise. The worst enemy to creativity is self-doubt” (Sylvia Plath, The Unabridged Journals of Sylvia Plath)

I don’t claim to be the best writer or blogger ever. I do know that I feel most alive when I’m writing and the words seem to flow out of me like they’re coming from somewhere else. Sometimes looking back, even the posts that I thought weren’t that great at the time seem to have improved with age.

I’ve been at this blog post business for going on 7 years and nearly 2,400 posts. That’s a lot of words. Not all of them have flowed out of me. Some days, I feel like Moses attempting to draw water from a rock.

If I have any advice for those who want to be writers, whether professionally or otherwise, it’s this– just write. Write a lot. Write every single day, even if what comes out feels like pure stupidity.

I’d also add one more thing. Find your own voice and be true to it. Don’t write or sing or paint or sculpt or film what you think will appeal to a mass audience. Do what speaks to you and what makes you happy and what makes you come alive. Create for an audience of one– yourself.

Ultimately, it’s not about numbers or popularity. It’s about expressing yourself and leaving a bit of yourself behind, whether on canvas or paper or vinyl or film. Success as I see it is staying true to your original vision.

Again, just write, write, write. That’s the only way to truly get better and to develop your own unique voice. The more you write, the better you will get at it.

Here endeth the lesson.

Six Years Later

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Lost in all the hoopla over both the Republican and Democratic National Conventions and all the madness that ensued was the fact that recently I celebrated my sixth anniversary of blogging for WordPress.

Part of me feels that it can’t have been six years because the time has gone by so very quickly. Another part of me is shocked that I’ve only been doing these posts for six years because I feel that I’ve grown so much since that very first one way back in July 28, 2010.

C. S. Lewis wrote that often on a daily basis you can see very little change, but when you look back over a number of years you see a huge difference between your present self and your former self. Time can be deceiving in that way.

I truly believe that monumental change happens in the form of daily small changes that happen over time. Every 10,000 mile journey begins with a single step and the daily choices you make that take you either closer to or further away from your desired destination.

I’m thankful for a vehicle like WordPress that makes it easier for me to get my thoughts out there into cyber-land. I also love the fact that it corrects my bad spelling so that you think I’m smarter than I really am.

My advice for those who want to write is two-fold: 1) find your own voice and 2) stay true to it. Finding your own voice means that you tell your own story and not someone else’s. It means that you write about what you know and what makes you come alive. Staying true to your own voice means that you write what’s in your heart, not what you think others will want to read. Most of all, just write.

Thanks, everybody, for six amazing years. Here’s to at least six more years of me writing and you reading.