writing

Hey June

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Admit it. You didn’t just read those words. You sang them. I know I did (at least in my head). But can anyone pinch me because when did June get here and where did April and May go?

In less than three weeks, we’ll hit the day with the most daylight in it (which also happens to be the official first day of summer). After that, the countdown to Christmas is on. Well, at least for me it is. Most of you have other anniversaries and holidays on your radar, but since I am afflicted with Obsessive Christmas Disorder, then that’s where I’m focusing.

I keep thinking a lot about what my boss at my old job used to say: any day without a toe tag is a good day. I like it, but I think it’s not necessarily all good. For those who belong to Jesus, to live is Christ and to die is gain. It’s a win-win. So while not having a toe tag is a good day, maybe the day you and I get our toe tags might be sad for some, but it will be our best day ever.

Also, I want to apologize to any olden people for making fun of you when I was a kid when you said that time flies. I get it now. It does. The older I get, the faster it goes. At the same time, the older I get, the more I realize the less I need to be content. You know the old saying that you can’t take your toys and possessions with you when you die. There are no hearses pulling U-Hauls that I’ve seen lately.

Hello, June! Try not to be too hot and humid right away. I like to dip my foot in the shallow end of summer before I jump in. Send more breezes because it helps me sweat less and everyone around me in the vicinity of my armpits appreciates that. Oh, and less bugs this year would be great. Thanks!

Saturday Randomness

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It’s been a little while since I did a random post of random thoughts and such. I couldn’t think of anything better, so here we are with a little stream of consciousness.

I’m dog sitting currently for my sister and her family. Well, technically I’m dog sitting, rabbit sitting, fish sitting, and chinchilla sitting. So basically I’m pet sitting. But I like all the critters, so it’s all good.

I had to get a tire patched earlier today. I don’t know why, but I seem to be really good lately at picking up nails in my tires. It’s probably my new spiritual gift. I don’t even have to try. They just automatically gravitate toward my vehicle and latch on.

Also, I’m looking for some speakers to go with my sorta new turntable. The old one is probably DOA, so I’m trying to make the not quite so new one work. If you or someone you know has any idea of a good place to find some for a relatively good price, I’m all eyes and ears.

Also, I’m thankful. The older I get, the more thankful I am. I realize that most of those things I used to take for granted are really the best things in life. Faith, family, friends, food (kidding but not kidding), and so many other things. I’ve learned to quit worrying about what’s missing and start appreciating all that I already have, which is more than enough.

So far, I think I’ve nailed the random part. This one is all over the place, but hopefully in a good way. Plus, I am super tired and in need of a good night’s rest, so hopefully tomorrow will be back to your normally scheduled blog posts and maybe slightly less random.

Thank you for reading. You rock.

Smell Those Roses

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“Taking time to smell the roses leaves enduring impressions of a dear glory that, if sufficiently reengaged, can change the quality of our entire life. The rose in a very special way—and more generally the flower, even in its most humble forms—is a fragile but irrepressible witness on earth to a ‘larger’ world where good is somehow safe” (Dallas Willard).

I do take time occasionally to smell roses and other kinds of flowers, but I think in this case the idea is to slow down and savor your life. Don’t be in such a hurry that you wind up at the end of your life and have no memories of precious time spent with the people you love. After all, the only place you get to in a hurry is the grave.

This culture glorifies busyness. We abhor boredom or down time. We need to fill every single moment of the day with some kind of activity, and we think we can sleep when we’re dead. Unfortunately, you’ll end up dead a lot faster that way. Plus, so much of what we remember isn’t all those things we planned, but what happened when we were waiting or when our plans got intteruppted or changed. So much of when God speaks to us isn’t in the middle of our hectic schedule but in those margins when we’re finally able to be silent and still.

The old saying goes that you will never have time unless you make time for what’s important to you. You can let your life be dictated by the tyranny of the urgent, or you can prioritize what matters most to you and decide to put those things first in your life. Then you’re finally living and not merely existing anymore.

Lord, help us to focus on living well instead of merely living a long time. Give us eyes to see where You’re working around us and give us ears to hear what You’re saying to us. Slow us down so that we don’t miss what You want to do in us and through us. Amen.

Celebrating 54

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It seems lately that the time between birthdays gets shorter and shorter. I feel like I just had a birthday and now I’m having another one? Back in the day, it took forever for my next birthday and now I seem to have one every three months or so.

But honestly, I’m grateful for each one. I know many people, including two uncles and a cousin, who won’t get to celebrate growing old. Aging isn’t a burden that everyone must bear but a privilege that not every one gets to share. I do think that every morning I wake up is a gift from God, so I’m taking my life for granted less and less these days.

This year, I’m officially 54. At one point in my life, that would have seemed really old? Now? Not so much. Now I see people in their 20s and think how they’re super young. I imagine that as a 10 year old even people in their 30s were old to me. It really is about perspective.

Also, birthdays are less about presents and more about presence. It’s not so much the gifts as much as the people sitting around the table. At this point, if all they did was show up and wish me a happy birthday, I think that would be enough. That and a good birthday dessert. But mostly the people.

I love that I get to look forward to my older nephew’s birthday in March, then my younger nephew in April. My sister’s is in June, followed by my niece’s in October. We round off all the birthday shenanigans with my brother-in-law’s in November and my Dad’s in December, not forgetting my Mom’s in January. So basically, I get to look forward to birthdays all throughout the year.

Birthdays are good because birthdays mean that the people you love are still here. And that in and of itself is worth celebrating. Above all, it means we’re celebrating and declaring all over again the goodness of God for giving us people in our lives who love us and are there for us.

I’m certain that I enjoyed my birthday so much that I want to do it all again in 2027, God allowing. Also, thanks to everyone on social media who wished me a happy birthday. I took a short break from my social media fast to read every one of them. I am grateful, and I am blessed.

Happy Birth-Month to Me!

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I figured when you get to a certain age, you need to celebrate being alive. Somehow, I don’t think that one day is enough to appreciate the miracle of life, so I decided to take the whole month of February. I know, it’s a short month, even on leap years. But life is hard enough without allowing yourself some room for frivolity and fun.

My actual birthday is on February 28, as I was ever so close to being a leap year baby. If I’d been born only 11 hours later, I’d be celebrating on February 29 and only be 1/4 of my current age. I wish.

But age is nothing to be ashamed of, especially when you know far too many people who didn’t get to grow old. I see my life more and more as a gift, even when I’m starting to get those senior discounts without having to show any actual ID. That hurts a bit, I confess.

But God has been good to me for 53 years. I have way more blessings than I can count (and way more than I deserve if I’m being honest). I know that I’m a sinner saved by grace, and everything else that I get from God is the proverbial icing on the cake.

By the way, I wear size 8 1/2 Lucchese boots and I like my cabins size medium. JK. I figured out a long time ago that people matter more than stuff and memories last way longer than any possessions. Besides, I won’t be taking any of my stuff with me when I shuffle off this mortal coil. I mean have you ever seen a hearse pulling a U-Haul? Think about it.

Anyway, I’d like to make it to 100, but I’m thankful for whatever I get. If Jesus comes back before then, I’m definitely not going to complain. That will be the best day ever.

A Narnian Excerpt

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Because I’m sleepy and my brain is banana pudding, here’s an excerpt from one of my favorite books out of one of my favorite series. The book is The Horse and His Boy, and the series is The Chronicles of Narnia. Both are by C. S. Lewis, and I recommend both, whether you’ve never read them before or have read them each 100 times:

“Bree turned round at last, his face mournful as only a horse’s can be. ‘I shall go back to Calormen,’ he said.

‘What?’ said Aravis. ‘Back to slavery!’

‘Yes,’ said Bree. ‘Slavery is all I’m fit for. How can I ever show my face among the free Horses of Narnia?—I who left a mare and a girl and a boy to be eaten by lions while I galloped all I could to save my own wretched skin!’

“We all ran as hard as we could,” said Hwin.

‘Shasta didn’t!’ snorted Bree. ‘At least he ran in the right direction: ran back. And that is what shames me most of all. I, who called myself a war horse and boasted of a hundred fights, to be beaten by a little human boy—a child, a mere foal, who had never held a sword nor had any good nurture or example in his life!’

‘I know,’ said Aravis. ‘I felt just the same. Shasta was marvelous. I’m just as bad as you, Bree. I’ve been snubbing him and looking down on him ever since you met us and now he turns out to be the best of us all. . . .’

‘It’s all very well for you,’ said Bree. ‘You haven’t disgraced yourself. But I’ve lost everything.’

‘My good Horse,’ said the Hermit, who had approached them unnoticed because his bare feet made so little noise on that sweet, dewy grass. ‘My good Horse, you’ve lost nothing but your self-conceit. No, no, cousin. Don’t put back your ears and shake your mane at me. If you are really so humbled as you sounded a minute ago, you must learn to listen to sense. You’re not quite the great Horse you had come to think, from living among poor dumb horses. Of course you were braver and cleverer than them. You could hardly help being that. It doesn’t follow that you’ll be anyone very special in Narnia. But as long as you know you’re nobody very special, you’ll be a very decent sort of Horse, on the whole'” (C. S. Lewis, The Horse and His Boy).

If I Win the Lottery . . .

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If I win the lottery, I won’t go around posting it all over social media. But there would be signs. Just perhaps a modest little cabin in the woods, right?

Truthfully, I do fantasize about owning a home like this. Even though the chances of me living here are about the same as me winning the lottery (or me getting struck by lightning), it’s still fun to picture myself in my red plaid robe walking down those front steps (that are hopefully not iced over like in the picture).

But then I remember Jesus said that in His Father’s house are many rooms, although I prefer the old King Jimmy version that calls them mansions. Whatever I can conjure up in my mind as being over the top ornate and opulent, heaven will be better. It will be a thousand times more incredible than any episode of Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous with all its champagne wishes and caviar dreams.

But the best part of all won’t be the streets of gold or all the gates with precious stones. It will be seeing Jesus there. The joy of every longing heart will be made sight and the hope of the world will wipe away every tear from our eyes in a place where there is no more need for grieving.

That’s what I look forward to more than anything else. I long for no more bad news. I long for no more reports of murder and bloodshed and war and hatred and unrest. I long for when the lion can lie down with the lamb in peace and safety.

But if it’s God’s will for me to live in the cabin pictured above, I’d do my best to suffer through it for the Lord and put on my best face in the attempt. One can dream, can’t one?

Old Time’s A-Flyin’

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I heard something interesting from a movie I was watching earlier today. One of the characters said that time is basically relative. Riding 8 seconds on a bull can seem like an eternity, but so can that time between 8 am and 3 pm on a school day. I get that.

I also remember when the time between the beginning of fall and Christmas felt like forever. I was not patient as a child, so I was ready for December 25 to hurry up and get here. Now, I wish I had that time back. I wish time moved as slowly as it seemed to move back then.

Now, I blink and it’s almost Halloween. I blink again, and there will be turkey and gravy with all the fixings on the dining room table for Thanksgiving. Then it will be Christmas. I will hardly have time to process one before the other is upon us.

I suppose that is the blessing and the curse of growing older. Now, I hardly have to wait for anything anymore, but I also feel like life has increased from a marathon to a sprint finish. It’s all I can do these days to remember what month it is, much less the day.

But I’m thankful for each day. I’m thankful to God for waking me up this morning and giving me another 24 hours. I’m trying not to take life for granted when I realize that so many people my age and younger won’t get to see tomorrow. So many people I knew growing up won’t get the privilege of growing old.

I suppose I need to take a few deep breaths and savor this one and only life that I have. The Bible speaks about redeeming the time, using it wisely instead of wasting it by wanting to hurry on to the next big event, next holiday, or even the next weekend. I can live in the moment just as much on a Monday as on a Saturday.

One day, I will step into eternity. Looking back, I’m sure the entirety of this life will seem so very short in comparison. One movie I saw had this quote: “The whole human life is just a heartbeat in heaven.”

I think that’s true. Our lives this side of heaven are like the blink of an eye. But what we do in that blink determines our eternity. More accurately, the choices we make affect where we will spend eternity. Like the decision to follow Jesus as Lord and Savior. That’s the one I’ve never regretted and the one I stake my hopes on as my life gets closer and closer to the ending. I’m definitely over the halfway point.

Hopefully, I can live in such a way that my legacy won’t be anything I leave behind but those who will go with me into heaven because I was a good and faithful servant and was ready to give an answer for the hope I have when people asked.

The Houses that Built Me

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A couple of years ago, my family got the opportunity to revisit some of the old houses where I lived, as well as my grandparents’ houses. It was a fun trip down memory lane, but I realized one thing.

I didn’t get the wave of nostalgia that I was expecting. Some of the houses had changed quite a bit, but some looked the same. The difference was that the people I loved weren’t there anymore. Some have moved away, some have gone to heaven.

It wasn’t the brick and mortar that I truly loved. It was the people inside. It was the memories we made within the walls of each of the houses. Today, if I were given the chance to wander through these houses, I doubt I’d recognize very much. I’m sure a lot has changed in the 30+ years since I was last there.

Sometimes, I think I want to step into the past, if only for a moment. I just want to be a fly on the wall and revisit some old memories. I just want to see the faces and hear their stories. The older I get, the more trouble I have remembering what they looked like or what their voices sounded like.

But I’m thankful. I’m grateful for everything I learned, every experience I had in these places, both good and bad. I think who I am now was shaped by the people who lived there. I carry a little bit of each and every one of them with me.

One of the rewards of heaven will be seeing all the old faces again. Maybe they’ll all be young again. They will have all their memories back. They won’t be fragile or in pain. It will be just like old times — even better, since Jesus will be there.

I hope that the people living in those homes are making new memories. Maybe one day a long time from now, someone will drive up and instantly be able to conjure up a million scenes from the past that they can think about and smile.

Happy Blog-versary to Me!

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I just realized that I started my blog post 15 years ago today. I have posted something every single day since then, bringing my total blog posts to 5,455. That’s a lot.

I don’t mean to humble brag. Well, maybe I do a little. I’m a little proud of that discipline in my life. I’m grateful for the platform and for the longevity of what I’ve been doing through WordPress.

I’m super thankful for every single person who has read these writings of mine over the years. Sometimes, I’m surprised by just who is reading them. People I never would have expected to read my blogs have told me how much what I’ve written means to them.

Really, it’s not about the numbers. I confess I can get too caught up in the daily numbers at times, but then I remember that it was never about that. Even if it were just me writing for myself (and my mom, of course), it would still be worth it. If I had just 2 people reading my blog posts every day, I’d still do it.

A lot has changed since 2010. I’m not who I was 15 years ago. The way I process and handle my life is different. The only constant since then has been God. He’s been the only thing that hasn’t changed one bit since July 25, 2010.

I’d like to say that my goal is for another 15 years and to hit 10,000 blog posts. Honestly, I just want to be faithful to what God is teaching me. If one single person follows Jesus and is in heaven because of the words God gave me, then I can call this a success. Just one.

Thanks again to every one reading these words. You mean the world to me. I pray that God blesses you as much as you have blessed me.