Stolen Wisdom

I ran across another gem of a post on the social medias today. Specifically, it was the Facebooks. There’s so much wisdom in it that I’m going to copy it and share it as is. It’s called “Habits I Stole from My Grandma that Make me Disgustingly Calm & Unbothered.” Of course there will be a link to the actual post after:

“1. Wash the stress off in the shower, then leave it there. She said your bed is for rest and your shower is for release — never mix them up. Let the water carry the day’s weight down the drain, step out, and start clean. Some things are meant to be rinsed off, not slept with.

2. Move slow, especially when everything feels fast. She walked slow, spoke slow, poured her tea slow. Rushing tells your body there’s an emergency even when there isn’t one. The calmest person in any room, she said, is almost always the one who simply refused to hurry.

3. Say your no plain, with nothing after it. No apology, no explanation, no reason someone can argue with. “That doesn’t work for me” was a full sentence to her. She said every excuse you add is just a handle for them to pull. Give them nothing to grip, and they let go.

4. Keep a little money tucked away that’s only yours. Not for secrets — for peace. She said a woman with her own quiet cushion never stays anywhere for the wrong reason. Calm isn’t just a feeling, she told me. Sometimes it’s a small amount saved that nobody can touch.

5. Don’t argue with anyone who needs to be right. You can’t reason a person out of a story they’ve chosen to believe about you. So she let them keep it and kept her own peace. Unbothered, she said, isn’t winning the fight — it’s quietly deciding not to show up to it.

6. Eat something warm when the sadness comes. Not for comfort — for the body. She said a cold meal on a cold mood makes both of them worse. Warmth is the oldest signal there is that the danger has passed and you’re safe now. Let your body hear it and settle.

7. Leave while you’re still enjoying yourself. She ended the call first, left the gathering early, walked away from talk that only circled. Staying past your limit, she said, is exactly how resentment is built. People remember the woman who left while things were still good.

8. Treat other people’s panic as their weather, not yours. Their urgency is a report on their own planning — it’s not an alarm your body has to answer. She paused before absorbing anyone’s emergency, and most of the time, she simply chose not to pick it up.

9. Keep your hands busy when your mind won’t quiet. Knead the dough, tend the garden, fold the washing slow. Idle hands, she said, let worry take the wheel. Give the restlessness something useful to do, and the storm inside quiets while something small gets made.

10. Set the grudge down — you’re the only one carrying it. The anger you hold punishes you, not them; they sleep just fine. Letting it go, she said, wasn’t forgiveness for their sake. It was finally unclenching the hands you’d kept in fists for years. Set it down.

11. Sit in the quiet every day, even for a few minutes. No radio, no chatter, no phone — just you and the silence most people run from. She said you can’t hear your own life over everyone else’s noise. The answers you keep searching for are already waiting in the still.

12. Keep one small ritual that belongs to no one but you. Tea at the same hour, the same slow evening walk, the same quiet moment before bed. Never shared, never explained. A truly unbothered woman, she showed me, always keeps one room that only she holds the key to.”

Wrong to Worry?

“It is not only wrong to worry, it is real infidelity because it means we do not believe God can look after the little practical details of our lives; it is never anything else that worries us” (Oswald Chambers, Studies in the Sermon on the Mount).

First of all, I plead guilty. I am a worry wart much of the time. If I don’t catch myself, I can see myself imagining all sorts of worst case scenarios that almost never come to pass. I can work myself up into a good state of anxiety.

But what does my worry accomplish? Does it actually make my problem go away? Does it improve my situation even a little bit? Or does it keep me from making sensible and rational decisions?

Note: it’s one thing to worry and quite another to have anxiety brought on by chemical imbalances. Everyone has anxious thoughts, but what matters is what you do with them, or where you take them.

I heard the analogy that thoughts are like birds. It’s one thing to let them fly over, but another entirely to let them land in your hair and built a nest. The best way is to take them to God. The Bible calls it taking every thought captive. Don’t let it rule in your head and in your heart. Determine to think about things that are good and lovely like it says in Philippians 4:8.

You don’t want to worry. You also don’t want a Pollyanna type theology where you pretend that your anxiety doesn’t exist and manipulate your emotions into a constant state of faux peace. It’s best to be honest, and take that honesty to God like King David did in the Psalms.

“Don’t fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns. Before you know it, a sense of God’s wholeness, everything coming together for good, will come and settle you down. It’s wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life’ (Philippians 4:6-7, The Message).

The Gracious Wounds of God

“Sometimes the most gracious, merciful thing God could ever do is wound you. To wound you, (and in that wound bind you to Himself) is far more gracious than to bless you with everything you want and have you not know Him” (Matt Chandler).

I found out recently that my pastor who is battling cancer is in stage 4. I also learned that a surgery last month to remove the cancer was unsuccessful. At that point, a lot of people would either give into fear or throw in the proverbial towel altogether. But not my pastor.

He has maintained an incredible and submissive attitude throughout the entire ordeal. I’m not saying he never is afraid or gives into moments of doubt, but he is trusting God, no matter what the outcome. He reminded us that the way to fight spiritual battles is through praise.

It’s easy for me to lose perspective sometimes when I’m in a struggle and forget that others are dealing with way worse than I am. The secret is not comparison with others or dwelling solely on the problem but keeping our eyes on God. As I’ve heard it recently, the antidote to anxiety is the adoration of God.

My pastor referenced a passage where King Jeoshaphat is facing a combined army that is invading Israel and the odds are not good. Instead of panicking, he turns to God in prayer. The last line of his prayer is one of my favorite verses in the Bible: “We do not know what to do, but our eyes are on you.”

Sometimes, God has to wound us to get us to look up. Sometimes, He allows trials and suffering to get our attention. Sometimes, we face hardships and trials to purify our faith and get us to turn our eyes on Jesus. I’d rather be wounded and find the comfort of closeness with God than get everything I’ve ever wanted and not know God. That would be tragic.

Lord, get our attention. Help us see that there’s nothing else that we could ever desire that is better than You. You are the only one able to hold us together when we feel like we’re falling apart. You’re the only one who can heal our woundedness and brokenness. We don’t know what to do so much of the time, so we once again turn our eyes on You, the author and finisher of our faith. Amen.

Keep Calm and Don’t Forget to Breathe

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All of us have those moments of panic. Or maybe it’s just me. Like yesterday when I couldn’t find my keys. It was like they went to that special hidden worm hole where all those socks go.

I was sure I had set them down, but for the life of me I couldn’t remember when. In times like these, I remind myself to breathe. Take a deep breath and exhale it slowly.

I found my keys hidden under my wallet.

Sometimes, you get to anxious over what you’re missing and can look right at it without seeing it because you’re too distracted by trying to find it. Raise your hand if that made sense.

I have to remind myself that God is present even when my senses tell me He’s absent. Too often, I miss Him when I look for Him in times of stress and anxiety. Too many times I might be looking right at Him and not see Him because I’m too worried about finding Him.

He’s not lost. He never was. It’s me who gets lost. Breathing deeply helps me remember that. It helps to remind me that if I only stand still, God will come to where I am and find me.

An Exciting New Adventure

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“There is absolutely no experience, however terrible, or heartbreaking, or unjust, or cruel, or evil, which you can meet in the course of your earthly life, that can harm you if you but let Me teach you how to accept it with joy; and to react to it triumphantly as I did myself, with love and forgiveness and with willingness to bear the results of wrong done by others. Every trial, every test, every difficulty and seemingly wrong experience through which you may have to pass, is only another opportunity granted to you of conquering an evil thing and bringing out of it something to the lasting praise and glory of God.” ― Hannah Hurnard, Mountains of Spices

I feel a bit like Bilbo Baggins.

For those of you who aren’t nerds, Bilbo Baggins is a hobbit who is very much a homebody until Gandalf the great wizard invites him to be a part of a great adventure involving dwarfs and gold and dragons. If you want more info, read The Hobbit.

My temp assignment ended today, leaving me unemployed. Part of me is excited at the prospect of what God has in store for me. Part of me is scared in such a way that I won’t have to go to the bathroom for a while. Catch my drift?

God has a proven track record in my life. Up to this point, He has yet to fail me or let me down. True, His answers may not come when I want or look like what I expected, but they are always greater, not less, than what I dreamed.

The upside is that I can sleep in tomorrow. I have a bit of free time to hang out if you so desire. The downside is that I will be broke soon.

This could be a prime opportunity to panic. I choose instead to see it as a test of faith and another arena for God to once again prove Himself faithful. Did I mention that I’m a “glass half full” kind of guy?

More exciting installments of my new adventure to follow.

Ohhhhhhhh, Fudge– Yet Another Monday Morning in Perspective

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This was one of those kind of Monday mornings that make you want to say, “Ohhhh, fudge.” At least it did for me. And yes, I mean the kind of fudge like in the movie A Christmas Story.

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I was happily rolling along. . . well, at 5:30 am, it was more like sleepily rolling along to work. Then I looked up. It was either an 18-wheeler or large bus coming toward me, hugging the yellow lines. So I did what any red-blooded male would do.

I panicked.

I went to give the behemoth vehicle a wide berth and went too wide. My tires hit the edge of the pavement. It sounded like the whole side of my car was being shredded.

I managed to get to the side of the road. I was expecting to see gory car wreck carnage. Thankfully, all I saw was one fatally punctured tire.

I called AAA because I am mechanically challenged even when it comes to changing a tire. In my defense, those lug-nuts were on that wheel tight.

What was supposed to take 45 minutes or less took almost 1 1/2 hours. So I was late to work.

But after that, it got better. And I have to keep a few things in mind:

I’m sooo glad I had my AAA road service paid up.

I’m thankful I have a car to almost (but thankfully not) wreck.

I’m blessed to have a job to go to even if it occasionally starts at 6 am.

I’m grateful for a very understanding boss.

Most of all, I’m thankful every day that I don’t get what I deserve. I get grace instead.

PS  don’t suppose cussing in your head merits having to wash your mouth out with soap, right?

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