faith

Things I Love 4: The Slow and The Lackadaisical

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In case you didn’t get the title, it’s the opposite of those never-ending series of movies called The Fast and the Furious. I think we’re probably looking at at least 18 more of those, so gird your loins.

But I digress. Back to the list of things I love, starting at #81.

81) Spontaneously starting up conversations with strangers with small dogs at Starbucks. The best part is that we’re not strangers anymore, but friends.

82) Finding out I wasn’t the only one who struggled with that or felt that way.

83) Finally getting around to seeing a movie I missed years ago and finding out it was worth waiting to see.

84) Listening to Morgan Freeman’s voice (if he ever narrated a book on CD, I’d buy it, even if it was Intro to Trigonometry.

85) Finding out that U2 finally has a NEW album coming out later this year.

86) The elegance and beauty of Grace Kelly.

87) That the end of the Greatest Story Ever Told has already written and it’s has the best ending ever.

88) Or if you prefer, all of history is like the title page and table of contents, and after it ends is the real beginning of the Real Story in which every next chapter is better than the last and where you don’t want to ever put the book down.

89) The peace that comes with acceptance that a friendship is over and that it has served its purpose and best of all, being thankful for the time we had.

90) Every time I see the transformative power of the risen Christ in my life.

91) Believing in love again and especially believing that there really maybe someone out there who will want and desire me.

92) Being in a place at night where you can see the stars.

93) The smell of chlorine. I know it’s weird, but it takes me back to going to the Y as a kid.

94) The smell of bus exhaust. Again, it’s strange, but this time it takes me back to the days of marching band trips.

95) Watching fireflies and listening to a symphony of crickets on a slow country night.

96) Seeing a mother who isn’t preoccupied or busy or glued to her smart phone and is loving on her child and living in the moment.

97) Those little candies called Smarties.

98) That I really can taste the rainbow when I eat a Skittles.

99) Listening to my cat snore.

100) The good feeling I get after eating a really good Southern home-cooked meal.

101) That there will be more of these blogs because there are so many more little things that I love.

Things I Love 3: The Trilogy of Terribly Named Blogs

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I continue with my list of things that I love, things that may not seem like such a big deal, but are present and daily reminders of the goodness of God in a thousand small ways. I will pick up where I left off with #57.

57) Not feeling the need to be friends with everyone so you can have deeper friendships that have more meaning.

58) When you hear a sermon that speaks directly to you and feels like it was written specifically for you.

59) All the black and white episodes of The Andy Griffith show.

60) A well-timed pun.

61) Finally being comfortable in my own skin.

62) Being able to laugh at my own goofiness and not be bothered by the fact that I’m a goober 99% of the time.

63) That all the future promises of God are as good as done.

64) GPS that keeps me from getting lost on these hopelessly and gloriously confusing roads in and around Nashville.

65) That  nothing, absolutely nothing, will ever separate me from the love of God in Jesus Christ.

66) Taking all my size 34 jeans to Goodwill because they’re way too big for me now.

67) Scottish, Irish, and British accents.

68) The fact that I’m taller than Tom Cruise.

69) People who get me.

70) That the people who matter don’t mind and the people who mind don’t matter.

71) Reading through The Chronicles of Narnia and The Lord of the Rings every single year.

72) Ditto for The Hobbit.

73) My very,very red New Balance running shoes that are super-duper lightweight.

74) Anything Patty Griffin has ever or will ever record– even if it’s singing through the phone book alphabetically.

75) That no one is beyond the reach of God’s love and that it is never too late to start over.

76) The movie Elizabethtown– and anyone who has actually seen it and appreciates it the way I do.

77) Wearing my red chucks, i.e. my very red vintage-style Chuck Taylor Converse high tops.

78) Any worship song by Hillsong, Kari Jobe, or Chris Tomlin.

79) A good quote from Mother Teresa.

80) That I promise in the future I will try to think of better titles for these blogs.

Things I Love Part 2: The Most Unimaginative Blog Sequel Title Ever

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In continuation of a blog I wrote earlier called “Things I Love,” I present you with the horribly titled follow-up called ‘Things I Love Part 2.” I think I stopped with #32 so I’ll start with #33. How very creative of me.

33) Being able to enjoy moments and relationships for what they are and not constantly worrying about what they may or may not become in the future.

34) The smell of freshly-cut grass on a Saturday.

35) Candles and potporri around the Christmas season that always make me remember my childhood and relatives who are no longer with us.

36) Really old books that have that musty smell and have worn covers from being read so much.

37) When a plan comes together, like on the A-Team.

38) Being able to rejoice for my friends when they finally find their true loves.

39) The feel of soft grass on my bare feet at night.

40) Unexpected and encouraging texts from family and friends (all the more since my love language is words of affirmation).

41) My nephews and my niece.

42) Sand volleyball with good friends on a Sunday night.

43) Knowing deep down that I am forgiven and free from any condemnation.

44) Watching my cat curled up in my lap and sleeping soundly.

45) Any episode at any point from the TV show Friends.

46) Actually stopping and smelling the roses wherever I find them.

47) Knowing that in a world of constant change and turmoil Jesus Christ is truly the same yesterday, today, and forever.

48) Audrey Hepburn.

49) Singing a favorite song and turning on the radio to find the same song playing in the spot where I was just singing.

50) Being able to encourage a friend with just the right words whether through text or in person.

51) Breathing in the crisp cold air on an idyllic autumn day.

52) Bonfires and hotdogs and smores on a chilly autumn night.

53) Sitting on the patio of The Frothy Monkey in downtown Franklin, sipping on a White Monkey Mocha, and watching people all around me engaged in all sorts of conversations.

54) A good hike around Radner Lake.

55) The salty smell of ocean air when I’m near the beach.

Things I Love

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I was inspired to create this list by a book I’m reading called One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp. The goal is to see life and everything good in it as a gift from God. So here goes part 1 of the list:

1) The smell of the air after a thunderstorm.

2) Rain on a tin roof.

3) Sunsets on the beach.

4) My family– every single one of them.

5) My friends– all of them, too.

6) Life.

7) Downtown Franklin on a cool Saturday night.

8) The way a new bride glows on her wedding day.

9) The way a new groom’s face lights up when he sees his new bride in her wedding gown for the first time as she walks toward him down the aisle.

10) God’s heart for the orphans and the widows– basically, those without a voice.

11) My cat Lucy

12) Cheg-nog from Starbucks.

13) Chocolate chip cookies from The Frothy Monkey (whether they are truly gluten-free or not).

14) Good music.

15) Good movies.

16) Good books.

17) Savannah, Georgia.

18) Being a greeter every week on the Kairos greeter team with the best people in the universe!

19) My addiction to caffeine.

20) Fitting into size 29 jeans.

21) That my Abba Father is still very fond of me after all this time.

22) True love.

23) The feeling of taking off dress socks.

24) Swing dancing.

25) Ultimate frisbee.

26) Kindness lived out and grace extended.

27) Waking up to a new day with new mercies and a clean slate.

28) The unguarded joy of children over the smallest things.

29) The Advent season with its gaudy decorations and cheesy songs and the reminder of Immanuel– God with us still.

30) That every time a bell rings, an angel gets its wings.

31) That I can fail big and stick around and make ’em wonder why I’m still smilin’!

32) For more lists to come in the future.

Fear and Faith

/ Ragamuffingospelfan / 1 Comment

I’m not alone when I say that I have known fear and anxiety. Lately, I’ve heard several of my friends talk about their own fears and worries. I’m pretty sure that everybody deals with fear on some level.

But the question of the day is this: will you let fear run your life or will you step out in faith? Will you put your foot out into the air, not knowing if there will be ground underneath for it to land on? I know your mind just went to that scene in Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade. Mine did. That’s exactly what the step of faith looks like. It means either God comes through or you will crash and burn.

I think for a lot of people, their fear of failure is stronger than their desire for success. They want to avoid failing more than they want to succeed, and the result is that they will fail from not trying. Failing is not failure, but not trying is.

I truly believe that God reveals himself as we obey. As we can take those steps of faith, God knows we are ready to handle a much greater revelation of himself. We know much more of God’s ability to come though in the clutch when we go out on a limb for him.

So my advice is to do what you’re afraid of. Ask her out. Apply for that job. Make that call to your estranged friend. Share your faith with a co-worker. Quit that dead-end job and pursue your dream.

God will honor you. He hasn’t failed you yet and he’s not about to. Remember, as I heard recently, that if God is calling you out, he has already given you the victory there. You only have to step out and claim it.

Perfect, complete, mature love, i.e. the love of God, casts out fear completely.

Friends

/ Ragamuffingospelfan / 1 Comment

As I’ve stated many times before, I am still trying to figure out this whole friendship thing. Sometimes I do good, sometimes . . . not so much. I’ve had good friends who I still count as friends and I’ve had some that I probably creeped out a little and who aren’t as friendly to me anymore.

I’ve learned in my life not to beat myself up over the friendships that I feel like I’ve botched. It’s not up to me to carry every single one of my relationships. God is more than able to keep people in my life that need to be there. It’s so much less stressful that I can relax and be myself and not have to worry if that will be enough for people to like me.

I’ve learned to always give the benefit of the doubt and to see my friends in the best possible light. Essentially, I’ve learned to give them grace, because God knows I sure need it. Often.

To my friends who have stuck around, I’m thankful. I don’t deserve you, but I’m glad to have you in my life.

To my friends who I’ve run off or weirded out, I hope you give me grace and a second chance. But I don’t blame you if you don’t. I am still very much a work in progress and though I am at a much better place mentally, spiritually, and physically than I’ve ever been, I still have some broken places and hidden hurts that surface from time to time.

To all my friends, whether you were only around for a few weeks or are still here after many years, thank you. You bless me more than you know. You encourage and support me, you pray for me, you keep me honest, you love me, and you show me Jesus every single day.

I hope one day I can finally be the friend that I’ve always wanted. And with God’s help, I believe I will be.

Raise Your Hand: A Blog About Relationships

/ Ragamuffingospelfan / 2 Comments

Ok. Informal survey. See if any of these scenarios fit you. Here goes.

Raise your hand if you’ve ever been interested in someone and gone to the place where he or she works or hangs out in the hopes of “accidentally” running into him or her? And technically, that’s not stalking. It’s only stalking when you know for sure that person will be there.

Raise your hand if you’ve ever posted something on facebook in hopes that a certain someone would read it. Because that always works. Not. Of course, I’ve NEVER done anything REMOTELY like that. I’ve NEVER found out the hard way how completely futile that is.

Raise your hand if you’ve ever judged the health of a relationship based on how many times the other person likes or comments on your statuses and posts on facebook. Yeah, I seem kinda hung up on the whole facebook thing, but play along with me. Maybe you see the absence of response to your posts and texts as a lack of interest on the other’s part, or even an indicator that that person is upset with you or doesn’t like you. Again, I can say that I’ve never . . . . ok, I’ve been there, done that, thrown the pity party. Now I take pills and I do much better.

Raise your hand if you’ve ever obsessed over the next time you might see that certain someone and rehearsed in your mind what you would say to them. You even got the script down perfect. The only problem is that real life never follows those rehearsed scenarios and real people tend not to want to stick to your script.

What little I know about relationships is this: there are no perfect relationships because there are no perfect people. You can’t make any one person your life or build your future on the hopes of a relationship. To put another person on that kind of pedestal is to put that person in the place of God and put a burden on them that they were never meant to bear.

So I’ve learned to trust God. And pray a lot. And take deep breaths. And not freak out. The other person most likely is just as scared and intimidated and nervous and self-conscious as you are. They just have different ways of showing (or hiding) those things.

By the way, I bet you feel pretty silly sitting in front of your computer all by yourself with your hand raised in the air. You can put it down now.

My 1000th Blog!!!

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It’s true. I’ve written 1,000 blogs since I started this 2 1/2 years ago (it will be 3 years in July). I never thought I’d be mega-popular or successful, although I occasionally had moments of delusions where I was hoping to see massive readership. But that’s just not my style.

It’s mostly a way for me to get my feelings and thoughts out there. It’s been very therapeutic for me and, hopefully, for you as well. I stand by my statement that if I were the only one who read my own blogs, I’d still write them. It would still be worth it.

Who knows? One day I might get Jon Acuff-like numbers. I doubt it, but in this crazy world, just about anything’s possible.

My process is still usually to take a topic or a phrase that grabs my attention and run with it. I could hear a song or a speech or watch a movie and be inspired that way. Sometimes I sit down at my laptop and have no idea what’s going to come out.

I still do very little revisions or rewrites. It’s still basically a one-take deal. That might not work for everybody and it’s probably not the way professionals do it, but it’s what I’m comfortable with and it works for me.

I’m still so grateful for anyone who reads these things. I’ve been astounded and amazed by the people who tell me that what I write means so much to them. I usually have no idea. But I’m so blessed to have so many who faithfully keep up with me.

I hope you will continue to read these and pass them along to others you think might benefit from them. I will continue to write them as long as God allows. It’s not about numbers, it’s about putting what’s on my heart on these blogs. That’s all.

Here’s hoping there’s 1,000 more.

 

Just Another Sleepy Sunday

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I have been sleepy all day today. Maybe it’s because it’s been grey and overcast just about the entire day. Maybe because it’s Sunday. Maybe it’s because I didn’t take my customary Sunday afternoon, choosing instead to watch an old movie on TCM.

Regardless, I have a feeling I’ll sleep really good tonight.

I’ve never been more aware of my dire need for God than lately. I need him desperately every hour of every day, every minute of every hour, and every second of every minute. He’s the one who holds me together.

I’ve also never been more aware of the abiding peace of knowing that God is in control of my life. I don’t know what the days and weeks and months ahead hold for me, but I know God knows.

So instead of seeing problems and obstacles, I’m choosing to see blessings. Like the blessings of family and friends, good health, freedom of worship, and life. I hope I never get over the joy of celebrating each and every day as a gift and every person in my life as a blessing that I don’t deserve but I get anyway.

So many will go to bed hungry. So many will end the day alone. So many will have to wake up tomorrow without purpose or meaning or God in their lives.

I need to remember that I’m not blessed so I can grow fat and happy. I’m blessed so that I can in turn be a blessing to someone else who needs it.

So my questions to you are the same ones I’m asking myself. Who are you going to be a blessing to today? Who will you pray for? Who will you encourage? Whose lives will you speak into, whether through a phone call or a text or a facebook post?

If you woke up at all today, you’re blessed. If you had at least one meal today, you’re blessed. If you had shelter from the rain and a car to drive, you’re blessed. If you had family and friends to cheer you up, you’re blessed.

So, how will you pay it forward?

The One Constant

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When I started this little blog roughly 2 1/2 years ago, I had no idea what would happen. I didn’t know if it would blow up or dry up.

It turns out that I have gained a loyal following, not very big by blogging standards, but quite enough for me. Hey, I’m happy if one other person besides me reads my blogs. It really is very therapeutic and I’d still do these even if I were the only one who read them.

Quite a bit has changed since I started this journey. I lost my job, started new medication, gained some new friends, and basically grew up quite a bit. But one thing hasn’t changed. God remains faithful.

In the mist of seemingly daily global chaos, God remains constant. He truly is the same yesterday, today, and forever.

I heard a pastor say that one of the meanings of the word glory is weight. And only Jesus is strong enough to be able to hold all the bits and pieces of your life together to keep you from falling apart. Not relationships, not careers, not healthy living and exercise, not even religious activities.

While all these things are good things, they can’t ever be the only thing. Only God can be that. Only God deserves our utmost affection, attention, and devotion. Anytime we give that to anything or anyone else, that’s idolatry.

It would take too long for me to recount all the times I’ve committed idolatry in my life. Let’s just say I’d have to use more than my fingers and toes to count them all.

But even then, God is faithful. While I go chasing after the next god, he remains constant. He’s still for me and waiting for me to come back. No, better than that. He’s wooing me back in the midst of my infidelity.

So just remember God is the only one worthy of worship. After all, he’s the only one big enough, strong enough, tender enough, and loving enough to get you through.