Imaginary Girlfriends and Other Odd Topics

Yeah, I heard about Manti Te’o’s imaginary girlfriend. I don’t know (and I don’t care) if he was in on the hoax or not. I’m not even sure what the point was. In fact, the more I think about it, the more it makes me want to lie down and take a nap.

But if I had an imaginary girlfriend, she’d look a lot like Zooey Deschanel. Or possibly Grace Kelly (if we’re allowed to use dead celebrities). And knowing my luck, I’d fool exactly no one. But she’d be pretty.

It seems to me that there are so much more out there that’s news-worthy. Imaginary girlfriend hoaxes strike me as being tabloid fodder more than actual news stories. But then again, I am not in charge of what is considered news.

That’s why I like my television to be as unrealistic as possible. Reality is too weird. I’ll stick to aliens and vampires and zombies and alternate universes. You know, the normal stuff. I avoid reality television shows like the plague and am drawn to shows like The X-Files and Charmed and Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Revolution (I do like some current series).

There’s not really a moral lesson in all this. Well, maybe this. I have enough trouble keeping my own life in line without worrying about other people’s issues. I certainly can’t cast any stones when I see my own long list of past mistakes and stupid choices.

I’m not quick to jump on the moral superiority bandwagon and bash those who’ve lied or cheated or messed up in some way. Who knows? I might have done the same or worse in a similar predicament.

I’d better end this quickly. My imaginary (and pretty) girlfriend just texted me and wants to set up a skype session. Now, I’m thinking she looks like Selma Hayek.

PS I’ve changed my mind again for the last time. Introducing my imaginary girlfriend whom I text every night. We are so very close, in a completely virtual way.

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It Runs in the Family

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When I was little, I used to love to go over to my grandparents’ house. One of my favorite things to do there was to find a pair of my granddad’s boots and walk around in them. They probably came up to my knees and were way too big for my little feet, but I didn’t care. Just the fact that I was walking in my grandfather’s shoes was enough for me.

Fast forward about 30 or so years. I’d been living in Nashville for 5 years and felt the time was right to complete the acclimation by purchasing a pair of cowboy boots. I mean, I’d already started listening to some country music (just not the kind where the girl thinks the tractor is sexy).

I looked at a lot of boots. There was one pair of Dan Posts (shown in the above picture) that I was drawn to the first place I looked. No matter how many other places I looked, I couldn’t find any others that seemed to call my name the way these did. I can’t explain it other than to say that these boots spoke to me.

I shelled over $230 bucks for these bad boys. I know in cowboy boot world, that’s not a lot. Boots can easily get up into the $3000 and up category, especially if they’re custom made. But that was a LOT of money for me to spend on shoes.

It turns out that my grandfather’s favorite kind of boots were Dan Posts. I didn’t find that out until after my purchase, but it was a kind of  confirmation for me that I had picked the right pair.

Now every time I put them on, I feel like I’m walking in his shoes, so to speak. And it feels good. It makes me grateful to have been a small part of a legacy of love.

 

Something Good to Remember on a Monday

Matthew 5:1 says, “Seeing the crowds, he went up on the mountain, and when he sat down, his disciples came to him.”

I’ve read past that a thousand or more times. I’ve rushed past those words to get to the Sermon on the Mount, the good stuff. But I think I’ve done myself a disservice by not paying attention to this verse, particularly the first three words: “Seeing the crowds.”

Did you catch that? He saw the people who came to see him. He didn’t see bodies. He saw faces lined with pain. He saw heartaches and anxieties and unrest. He saw people just trying to get through the day.

Just as he sees you and he sees me.

Do you ever feel unnoticed? Do you ever post on facebook and no one responds? Do you ever comment on someone else’s post and he or she responds to everyone else but you?

Do you often feel invisible in a crowd? Has the thought ever crossed your mind that no one would miss you if you were suddenly not there? Or like George Bailey, do you think the world would be better off if you’d never been born?

You may not feel like anyone knows you or the secret shame and pain you carry. Jesus does.

You may think that you don’t matter to anyone. You matter to Jesus.

You are not alone. You have an advocate, someone who is on your side, who fights for you, who roots for you, who won’t abandon you in the dark or in the storms. His name is Jesus.

I didn’t come up with this, but it’s still true: if you had been the only one lost and in need of a Savior, Jesus still would have gone through every bit of the cross just for you. He loves you that much.

If your Monday’s been awesome, that’s great. God rejoices with you. But if your Monday was horrible and couldn’t end soon enough, this promise still holds true.

This is from a ragamuffin who needs daily reminders of the goodness of God as much as anyone else. God is faithful, even when it seems he is absent. He is good, always.

 

Haunted

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I spent some time yesterday at some land that’s been in the family for a while. We affectionately call it The Farm, although it hasn’t really been used for farming in a very long time.

Still, for me it brings back so many memories. I remember coming there every summer as a child and playing with my sister and cousin. That was back when I was sure I’d find a secret cave or a buried Confederate treasure. I never did, but the memories I have of those days are much more valuable than any old coins I could have found.

More than anything, I’m haunted by the memory of people who I miss. I still expect to see them there, like they’re as much a part of the place as the old buildings and trees.

I expect to see my uncle ambling down the road, wondering what funny story he had for me.  Or my other uncle coming down the gravel driveway in his Ford Bronco. Or maybe my grandmother sitting on the porch, smiling and singing an old hymn. I’d give anything to be able to go outside in the middle of the night with my cousin and do nothing but look up at the sky lit up with stars.

I especially miss when the whole family would get together once a year for a family reunion and the food would taste better and the conversations would be sweeter on that day than any other.

Every blade of grass holds a memory and every leaf is a reminder of days passed. I can pass through those gates and feel exactly like I did when I was 10 years old and still obsessed with old coins and baseball cards.

I think C.S. Lewis was the one who said that a pleasure is not fully consummated until it is remembered. It’s too bad I couldn’t fully appreciate those days and the people for what they were– a gift. But I have memories now that make me smile. And that’s enough.

 

 

What Are Christians For?

I was finishing up season 1 of Downton Abbey when a facebook post caught my eye. It was entitled “A Christian’s View of Downton Abbey.” I had to read, though I feared what the result would be.

My fears were realized. The reviewer condemned the series after watching part of an episode.

I’m not here to say the assessment was wrong. You have the right to your opinion and I have the right to mine. What bothered me was that this is yet another example of how we as believers are known for what we’re against, rather than what we’re for.

I still remember how Christians came out against the Harry Potter books and movies, even though most of them had not read one word of the books or seen any part of the movies. I even saw Christians attack Twilight and try to tie the series to teenagers wanting to become vampires. As if Twilight was the only vampire franchise in town.

How does any of this attract people to Christ? How does any of this show love? I’m all for personal convictions, but I’m not about to impose my personal convictions on someone else. I’m not about to condemn someone else who has different convictions than mine.

I choose to show what I’m for rather than what I’m against. I want people to know I’m for Jesus and all he stands for. That’s love, forgiveness, second chances, repentance, belonging, renewal, and –best of all– life abundant.

I don’t believe in condoning sin or sinful behavior. But I believe in loving the sinner.

Above all, I know how many times I mess up in a single day. I’m not about to pick up a stone to throw at anybody, because I know that I can’t say that I am without sin. I’ve been the recipient of grace from God and so many people over the years and now it’s my turn to pay it forward and show that grace to as many people as I can as much as I can.

This isn’t written by someone who’s figured it all out and is preaching at you from on high. As the old saying goes, “I’m just one beggar trying to tell other beggars where to find bread.” I’m just a sinner saved by grace who fell in love with Jesus and wants every single person to know that.

That’s all.

A Book Review In Progress Of A Book I’ve Already Read

importance

“The great mark of a Christian is what no other characteristic can replace, namely the example of a life which can only be explained in terms of God” (Cardinal Emmanuel Suhard).

I’m re-reading a Brennan Manning book, The Importance of Being Foolish: How to Think Like Jesus. I started off not sure of whether I’d read the book or not, but soon started recognizing that I had indeed read it before. No matter. It’s worth a second (or third or fourth) read because it still speaks the same truth it did the first time around.

The book resonates with me because it is all about getting the Christian faith back to the basics. Actually, one basic: knowing Jesus. Not just in a ecclesiastical or theological way. Not knowing facts about him or memorizing his words to spout off in an argument. It’s about knowing Jesus, celebrating how he chose a nobody like me (or anyone else) to love and rescue and save.

This Jesus isn’t the feel-good type who’s telling everybody to be nicer to each other. He’s not only a wise teacher trying to make us better people with better morals and better ethics. He’s God in the flesh who says, “I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father but through Me.”

It’s both comforting and convicting. It’s comforting in that it’s about knowing a Person, not following rules and being good enough. It’s convicting, because I can’t know Jesus and stay the same. I can’t follow Jesus and not have to change radically.

I love this quote of Manning’s (from another book he wrote):

“The gospel is absurd and the life of Jesus is meaningless unless we believe that He lived, died, and rose again with but one purpose in mind: to make brand-new creation. Not to make people with better morals but to create a community of prophets and professional lovers, men and women who would surrender to the mystery of the fire of the Spirit that burns within, who would live in ever greater fidelity to the omnipresent Word of God, who would enter into the center of it all, the very heart and mystery of Christ, into the center of the flame that consumes, purifies, and sets everything aglow with peace, joy, boldness, and extravagant, furious love. This, my friend, is what it really means to be a Christian.”

That’s what I’m after. Are you?

 

 

Borrowed Thoughts

I think a part of me would very much like to sleep until noon every day. That part of me would love to gorge myself with chocolate as much as possible and only eat foods that while being extremely tasty, are extremely bad for me.

I remember what a pastor said once. He said that no one ever wakes up in them morning and thinks, “Hey, today I’m gonna screw my life up beyond all recognition.” It all starts with choices.

I’ve never woken up thinking, “Today I’d like a heaping helping of humility and trials and crappiness in my day. I want everything to go wrong and to feel like the day is never going to end.

Just like the Israelites probably never thought, “Gee, I’d like to wander around in a desert for 40 years, eating some strange pastry that falls from the sky and drinking water out of rocks. That sounds like my cup of tea.” But that’s what they got.

God doesn’t often give us what we want as much as he gives us what we need. I may want non-stop chocolate, but I need to be healthy and not weigh 800 pounds. I may want to sleep late every day of my life, but I need to spend time with God in the morning to get my bearings put right.

I heard that discipline is getting us to a place we would have never thought to go on our own. On my own, I’d never think to develop a constant prayer life and a complete dependence on God. But when I find myself in places where my way just doesn’t work and I have no more answers, I find myself praying to and depending on God a lot more.

I’m grateful now looking back that I didn’t get a lot of what I asked God for in prayer. I thought I knew what I needed, but it was only what I thought I wanted at the time.

A perfect illustration is looking at a 1-year old. He may think he knows what he needs and what is best for him, but he doesn’t. He has to be told what is and what is not good for him. The father may have to discipline him to get him to see what he wants and what is best for him aren’t always the same thing. I’m a lot like that little boy.

May you and I come to embrace the hard days as well as the good ones, because they remind us of how much we really do need God every day. May Jesus use the trials and troubles we face to develop in us a constant faith and a undying hope and a love that won’t quit.

 

Tips for Getting Fit

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As of today, I’ve lost 30 pounds (insert Monty Python “Yay” sound effect). I feel much better. The only downsize is that none of my jeans fit anymore. Almost all of them are too big for me now.

How did I do this? Well, here are a few tips I’ve learned along the way that have helped.

1) Give up soft drinks. If you’re from the South, that means giving up Cokes. If you’re from anywhere else, that equates to no more soda/soda pop/carbonated beverages. Even the diet sodas (you’ll be amazed at how much the craving for sweets goes down once you’ve quit the Diet Dr Peppers and Diet Mountain Dews). It’s not easy, but as I can attest after nearly 9 months without them, it can be done. Giving up these soft drinks has helped me more than anything else I’ve done to lose weight.

2) Deliberately park further away. It seems people want to wait 15 minutes for a spot that is 5 minutes closer, but if you want to get fit, buck that trend and park further away than usual. That means you have to walk further. It may not seem like much, but every little bit counts.

3) Take the stairs instead of the elevator whenever possible. Unless of course you’re going up to the 99th floor in a 100-story building.

4) Buy a reusable water. I have a Camelbak insulated water bottle with a filter that I got on sale, but any BPA-free water bottle will do. I truly believe that if you have one of these, you will drink more water.

5) I’d recommend finding an affordable pedometer. It’s not essential, but it does help to see how many steps you take during an average day. A good pedometer will also take into account how long your stride is and will also tell you how many miles you’ve walked and how many calories you’ve burned.

The key is to do something. You don’t have to start right away with a grueling 2-hour workout session the very first day. Just turn off the TV and go outside for a walk. The important thing is consistency, doing something every day. Every single step matters, because it gets you one step closer to where you want to be.

In shape.

“Vermont. . . I Mean Tennessee should be beautiful this time of the year, all that snow”

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I really don’t mind cold weather. Or snow. Or even ice.

I don’t mind them as long as I don’t have to drive in them. Or scrape them off my windshield for 20+ minutes, which is what I found myself doing after work tonight.

I’d really like one good snow for the year. Maybe a foot or more. I may be dreaming about getting 12 inches of white stuff, but I’d take even an inch or two. Just as long as I don’t have to drive in it. Especially when it turns to sleet and ice.

It really is fun to watch as it falls and covers the ground. I like watching the earth disappear underneath all those snowflakes. It reminds me of Isaiah 1:18: “though your sins are like scarlet, they shall be as white as snow.”

Snow covers up a lot. It hides dead brown grass, along with the “presents” that the neighbor’s dogs leave in the yard. Everything is a blanket of white. And when the sun comes up, how brilliantly it dazzles.

Grace covers up a lot, too. You and I probably have a lot we wish we could hide. Harsh words spoken, dirty thoughts, petty actions taken. Friendships ruined, families broken, work relationships destroyed. The list goes on and on.

But grace means that when God looks at us, he doesn’t see those things. He doesn’t see your worst moment when you were at your weakest. He doesn’t see the litany of sins that stain your soul.

He sees the blood of Jesus that has washed you whiter than snow. He sees perfection, the very perfection of Jesus. He sees you and calls you his Beloved and says that he is very pleased with you.

Remember that the next time you see snow falling and be thankful for grace and second chances. I know I certainly am.

Downton Abbey, Or Why I Fell for All The Hype

DowntonAbbey

I didn’t know what to make of the show Downton Abbey. At first, I kept thinking it was Downtown Abbey, which sounded like one of those murder-mystery series featuring a crime-solving nun (who would also happen to have quite the British wit about her).

But I borrowed the first two seasons from a friend and now I’m hooked. It’s a little like all those period films like Howard’s End and Gosford Park, but the storyline is unique. And Maggie Smith is completely fantastic as always.

My favorite part is when Bates throws his leg brace into the lake. He had been going about his business, grimacing a lot and telling the others that he was perfectly fine. He was not.

I wonder how many times I’ve done that, carrying around a lot of secret pain and guilt and telling everyone who asked, “Oh, I’m fine.”

Or maybe it’s a secret struggle that you carry around. One that you’re sure you’re the only one who’s ever had to wrestle with. It could be a shameful mistake you can’t forgive yourself over. It could be words better left unspoken (or maybe words left unspoken that you wish you’d said).

The best part is that you don’t have to carry this load alone. You can find others who understand and share your burdens. Best of all, God already knows what you’re trying to hide. He’s known it all along. And that thunderbolt of judgment hasn’t struck you yet.

Confession really is good for the soul. I don’t mean blabbing your troubles to a stranger on the street. I do mean finding a good trusted friend and letting him or her know what you’re going through. I do mean being honest to God in prayer about it all.

I love the saying that goes something like this: “Griefs shared are divided, while joys shared are multiplied.”

May you find this to be true for you in the days to come.