11 years ago today, I had the idea to start writing blog posts and posting them to see what would happen. The goal is to discipline myself to write something every day, regardless of whether 1,000 people or just 1 person will read it.

Some days, the words flow like they’re coming from somewhere else and flowing through me. Some days, it feels like a chore to put anything together. On those days, it’s best to say, “I will try again tomorrow.”

That goes for most of life. Some days are good, some are not. Some days, you feel like everything goes right. The other days, you can’t do anything right. On those days, you can say, “I will try again tomorrow.”

That’s what courage really is. It’s not always heroic sacrifice or roaring. Sometimes, it’s that quiet voice that says, “I will try again tomorrow.”

I found this on a friend’s Facebook page and decided to “borrow” it because it speaks so powerfully and beautifully to the deep mystery of grief. I’m reminded of Queen Victoria who after her husband Prince Albert’s death, used to wrap herself in one of his old coats when she slept at night. I hope this little story of an orange cup will speak to those who are passing through the dark valley of the shadow of death over someone they loved:

“I washed the orange cup today.

‘The orange cup’ is not a metaphor. It’s a small, plastic cup—one of several in a multicolored set. It is small, and just perfect for the bathroom sink. It’s just big enough for a sip of water in the middle of the night, or to wash down daily meds. I had not washed it since before January 1st. Before you get too grossed out I had not used it either. You see, that little orange cup is the last thing in the house that Mark’s lips touched on January 1st, before he was loaded into an ambulance never to return.

I had picked up the orange cup several times before, thinking it was time to wash it and put it away. But each time it wasn’t. I would hug that little cup, cry a little (or a lot) and return it to the counter next to the sink. It wasn’t time to wash it—until today.

Today, I washed the cup.

When my mother died, her house coat (bath robe) was hanging on the back of the door in the bathroom. When my Dad died 5 years later, it still hung in the same spot. He had given away or tossed a lot of Mom’s items, but just not that house coat. Had he lived another 10 years, I think that it may still have been there… or maybe not.

Deep, profound grief is just weird. So, keep that in mind when you wonder why grieving people do (or don’t do) what you think they should do, or what seems normal. Grief is really weird. They’re just not ready to wash the cup” (Amy Boardman Rejmer).

That’s right, people. 59 days left until the official start of fall. Not that I’m counting or anything.

I’m tired of sweating so much. I’m tired of feeling I’m stepping into a sauna every time I step out the door. I’m tired of the rain only making it muggier instead of bringing refreshing coolness.

I’m ready to start wearing flannel again. I’m ready for a good bonfire with s’mores and hot dogs and crisp breezes. I’m ready for carving pumpkins and Halloween. I’m ready for carving turkeys and Thanksgiving. I’m ready for decorating trees and Christmas.

In the meantime, I’d settle for 75 degrees and low humidity. I’d settle for not sweating through my clothes after being outside for five minutes. God bless you if summer is your favorite, but please understand that you wearing a full-on sweater in 90+ degree weather is only going to make me sweat vicariously for you on top of the already profuse sweating I’m doing on my own behalf.

But there’s only 6 more days until August. That means school is starting back and the end of summer is nigh. Then September where we in Tennessee may or may not get a sneak preview or two of the upcoming fall season. Then comes pumpkin spice everything, whether it actually feels like fall outside or not.

But in the meantime, I hold out hope. 59 more days, people. We can do this.

“We believe that God forgives us our sins; but also that He will not do so unless we forgive other people their sins against us. There is no doubt about the second part of this statement. It is in the Lord’s Prayer; it was emphatically stated by our Lord. If you don’t forgive, you will not be forgiven. No part of His teaching is clearer, and there are no exceptions to it. He doesn’t say that we are to forgive other people’s sins provided they are not too frightful, or provided there are extenuating circumstances, or anything of that sort. We are to forgive them all, however spiteful, however mean, however often they are repeated. If we don’t, we shall be forgiven none of our own” (C. S. Lewis, The Weight of Glory).

In the prayer that Jesus taught to His disciples, He specifically mentioned that we pray that God will forgive us our transgressions as we have forgiven those who have transgressed against us. If we are of the mindset that we are unwilling to forgive others, it means that we have not experienced it ourselves. Not that I said unwilling, not unable. Only by the grace of the God who forgives us can we even hope truly to forgive anyone else.

Forgiveness is not an option for the believer in Jesus. Remember, He had way less reason to forgive us, yet chose the most extreme way to demonstrate that forgiveness in laying down His life for us. If He can do that, then we can choose to forgive.

Remember, forgiveness is releasing the other person or persons from the expectation that they can fix what they did to you, as I heard a pastor say more than once. It is not enabling them to continue to hurt you. It is not automatic and blind trust in that person. It’s simply releasing them from what they did to you.

The moment you choose to forgive, the one who walks in the most freedom is you. You are no longer bound by bitterness or animosity. You no longer live in captivity to the past where you were hurt.

It’s not easy. Jesus never promised to make obedience easy but to make it possible. He promised that if we are willing to follow Him and do what He said to do, He would enable us to do it. It may not happen overnight or even over weeks or months or years, but as God grows you into Christlikeness, you will find that you are able to love and forgive those Jesus has loved and forgiven. You will even be able to forgive those who aren’t loving or even sorry for what they did to you, just as He forgave the ones who were in the very act of murdering Him.

My philosophy is the more cringeworthy the joke, the better. In my old age, I’ve come to appreciate the fine art of the dad jokes. Even if I’m a cat dad, I think I’m still entitled to tell my fair share of bad jokes.

The art of the bad joke is in the telling. You really have to sell it to make it funny, i.e. less painful. And the fact that tomorrow’s Friday makes it less painful.

Also, I’m always on the lookout for more bad, corny jokes. You can post them in the comments or you can email them to me at gmendel72@icloud.com. The more, the merrier.

And, as always, you’re welcome.

I read something interesting and thought-provoking in an email I received today. It centers around philosopher Blaise Pascal and something he said when it comes to disagreements. Rather than try to put it in my own words, I’m copying and pasting it here:

“Philosopher Blaise Pascal was best known for his so-called ‘wager’ that believing in God is the smartest decision, even if you’re not sure God exists. What many don’t know is that Pascal was a pioneer in the psychology of persuasion.

Heated disagreements are common in social media, writes Olivia Goldhill at ‘Quartz.’ But Pascal suggested centuries ago that if you want to convince someone of your position, you don’t begin by telling them they’re wrong. You understand where they’re coming from, admit ways they’re right, but suggest they maybe haven’t seen the whole picture

‘No one is offended at not seeing everything,’ wrote Pascal. ‘But [they don’t] like to be mistaken.’

Another tip? Lead people to the answer, but let them discover it on their own. ‘People are generally better persuaded by reasons they have themselves discovered than by those from the minds of others.’

These are great tips, especially for Christians, who are entrusted with the most important truths there are, and who are to speak those truths in love.”

I think an additional aid in persuasion is listening to understand and not merely to reply. When the other senses that you care enough to take in what they are saying, they will be much more likely to listen to you in return. When they sense you’re interested in cultivating a relationship over time and not merely in preaching to them, they will be open to what you have to say.

Here’s the link to the article in full:

https://breakpoint.org/66206-2/?_hsmi=142074218&_hsenc=p2ANqtz-9U1A-PZtI8peh0UCBguhyn1yH8mAjkoQlC4JPOjj0nKZPTzN3Ksvze9kQvyOdsGxq1l0bdwrqSNeiOQxzzYa66Zc5riw

Recently, I rediscovered an amazing talent named Eva Cassidy. She was (and remains) as hard to classify and categorize as ever. She had a beautiful, angelic voice that felt right at home with folk, blues, jazz, and just about any other genre of music you can think of.

She was adamantly true to her vision of music, unwilling to compromise for the sake of record deals and popularity. She remained in obscurity during her lifetime and only attained to stardom and fame after her untimely passing at t he age of 33 from cancer.

She is known for the recordings of her concert at Blues Alley from 1996. Sadly, she would pass away 10 months later, never knowing the full impact of her music. In 2001, one of her albums unexpectedly reached #1 on the charts in Britain.

Her music was pure and honest, without any gimmickry or auto-tune or overdubs or anything that smacked of fake. Her vocal range was incredible and she had the ability to belt or to sing softly and sweetly. Either way, her voice was mesmerizing.

If you want, you can go to Youtube and type in Eva Cassidy. It will bring up videos of her live recordings as well as most of her studio output. Regretfully, there’s not a lot out there, but what exists is beautiful.

Thank you, Eva, for sharing your gift with us. We are better people for it.

“I’ve read the last page of the Bible, it’s all going to turn out all right” (Billy Graham).

Some days you need to know that the story has a happy ending. Some days aren’t necessarily the worst or best ever. They’re just somewhere in the middle kind of meh days.

No matter what, you need to know that because of the resurrection, the worst part is never the last part. Your story doesn’t end with ashes and defeat.

Even on good days, there’s a hint that something’s missing, like it’s almost perfect but could be a little better. Even the joy is tinged with a little bit of sadness.

I like the quote that says that everything will be fine in the end. If it’s not fine, it’s not the end. Because of the empty tomb, it’s true.

There she is. Just a tortie thinking deep tortie thoughts. Contemplating the unfathomable mysteries of all things feline. Perhaps dreaming of her next snack.

Man, I’d give just about anything to be a cat for a day. To sleep all day and have people bring me snacks and pet me and tell me I’m a good little boy. I settle for watching Peanut when she’s napping. It’s one of the most peaceful and calming things to watch a cat sleeping, with no cares or worries.

I may not be a cat, but I can learn how to rest with no cares or worries. Jesus said for me to take His yoke, for it is light and easy to bear. He said to cast all my cares and worries on Him because He cares for me. He said to come to Him when I am weary and overburdened and I will find real rest for my soul.

I may not can transform into a feline, but over a lifetime I can learn the unhurried rhythms of grace and how to slow down and to rest in my Father’s care.

“THE EARLIEST REFERENCE to the Resurrection is Saint Paul’s, and he makes no mention of an empty tomb at all. But the fact of the matter is that in a way it hardly matters how the body of Jesus came to be missing because in the last analysis what convinced the people that he had risen from the dead was not the absence of his corpse but his living presence. And so it has been ever since” (Frederick Buechner, The Faces of Jesus).

It matters that there is a ton of evidence to support the resurrection of Jesus. Of course there’s an empty tomb where the body of Jesus had been laid previously.

But the biggest evidence is the transforming presence of the risen and living Jesus. That’s what led those disciples from hiding out in an upper room to being willing to risk everything — including their lives — to spread the news of the Messiah to all the known world. That’s what led that small ragtag group of followers to completely turn their world upside down for the sake of the gospel. That’s the hope that we have in the world.