This is not how fall was supposed to work. It should be cold enough for flannel. There should be an abundance of pumpkin spice everything, as well as apple cider and all those other colder weather beverages that just don’t taste right when it’s above 80 degrees.

But there I was, mowing the lawn in 85 degree heat, sweating like the pig that’s about to become bacon and wondering why it was so hot. I didn’t sign up for this. I want my seasons.

I understand how seasons work in Tennessee. They never arrive when they’re supposed to. Only summer seems to get here early and doesn’t want to leave even when he’s clearly outstayed his welcome. He’s like the houseguest or relative that comes over to stay and simply won’t leave (which thankfully, I nor my family have no experience with).

I am delighted and grateful to see all the festive Halloween decorations going up in yards, but it feels wrong to be setting up spooky decor in a t-shirt, shorts, and sandals. It takes away a tiny bit of the mystique.

Supposedly, actual honest to goodness fall weather is coming next week. I for one can’t wait to put on a jacket for the first time since April and possibly even turn the heater on in my Jeep. Then I can play my Charlie Brown Halloween record and feel right about it.

Summer, you’ve had your time. You need to move on and let Autumn have a turn. You get to come back next year and be just as hot, so quit being a nuisance and go away. I need some crisp fall weather, stat!