writing

Why I Write These Things

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Recently, I checked the stats on my WordPress blogsite. I discovered that my latest blog got a grand total of six views for the entire day.

It didn’t ruin my day but it was a bit depressing. For a little while.

Part of me still likes the idea of maybe one day getting thousands of readers. Part of me still thinks an all chocolate diet would be a good thing.

I write these blogs ultimately for me. Really and truly, I’m surprised that anyone other than me reads them. But if no one else but me read them, I’d still write them.

I have to remind myself periodically about a few things like 1) God’s unconditional love for me, 2) it’s okay to be me with all my quirks and flaws, and 3) I write these blogs because I need to read them. So you can look forward to seeing something similar to this post in about 6-9 months. Lucky you.

So maybe I’ll never become an elite blogger. Maybe I’ll never set any records for most views in one day. Maybe. Maybe not.

But for me it doesn’t matter. I want to keep being as authentic and honest and transparent as I can because someone out there might need to hear– or read– what I have to say. So even if I put in all that effort for one person, it will have been more than worth it. Even if that one person was me.

The Creative Process

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Well, I confess that I’m once again stumped as to what to write about. I can’t think of a single interesting topic. As the saying goes, I cannot brain today; I has the dumb. True indeed. I has the dumb.

So maybe I thought I’d give you a bit of insight into the creative process that goes into writing a daily blog. In case you were wanting to try your hand at it.

My process is this: I ain’t got one.

I usually pay attention during the day and at some point, something will strike me: a bit of a conversation, a lyric from a song, a line from a movie. Just about anything.

Sometimes, I have no idea what to write about until I actually start writing. Like tonight. Sometimes I will borrow from something I’ve read that speaks my heart and mind better than I could.

They won’t all be the best blog ever written. Some will suck. But for me, the goal is writing something every day, whether anybody else reads it or not.

I’m still thankful for anyone else who reads these. I hope you’ve had as much fun reading them as I have in writing them.

That’s all. Good night (unless you’re reading this in full daylight, then I say “Good day!”

My Nothing Blog (Again)

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When you write a daily blog, chances are very good that some days you’ll have the ol’ blogger’s block. I’ve written almost 1,300 of these, so I’m allowed to have the occasional off-night.

I’m thinking that in my experience, nothing ever quite works out exactly like you want, but more often than not, what you get is better than what you originally expected. Try working that one out in your head.

Sometimes, you say goodbye to people you thought would always be around. Some people pop into your life unexpectedly and stay for a while. Very few will be in your life for the long haul.

I’m thankful for all the people in my life, whether they were there for one hour, one day, one week, one month, or one year. Some have gone and some are still around. Some were blessings and some were lessons.

If you’re reading this, I’m thankful for you. I don’t take you for granted.

Hopefully, I’ll have something better to write about tomorrow.

My Dear John Letter to Microsoft (Or Should It Be Dear Bill?)

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Microsoft/Windows/PCs in general,

I am breaking up with you. It’s just not working out. I could say the whole “It’s not you, it’s me” line, but that wouldn’t be true. It’s not me, it’s you.

There’s always that imminent threat of the almighty blue screen of death, of the hard drive crashing at any point and me losing everything I’ve typed and scanned so hard for. Not forgetting the ever-present looming viruses and malware that could strike at any time.

There are the smaller crashes, the freezes, the annoyingly eternal hourglasses, the increasing slowness. I just can’t take it anymore.

So I’m leaving you.

I’ve found something that will take better care of me and better meet my needs.

It’s a MacBook Pro.

It may take me a while to save up the money, but once I get it, I’m not looking back.

Don’t expect me to come crawling back on hands and knees. Don’t try to entice me with your wristwatches and expandable memory. I’m done with you.

It was real and it was great. And it was really great. But I gotta go.

PS The irony that I’m typing this on a Sony Vaio laptop is not lost on me. But when I do get my Mac, my blogs will automatically be 57% more user-friendly and artsy and 68% all-around better. I will be 74% cooler and hipper and look 53% better when sitting in Frothy Monkey with my steamy beverage.

That is all. Good day.

New Year’s Rockin’ Eve? Maybe

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So far, my mailbox isn’t exactly stuffed with invitations to parties and soirees for the end of the year. My phone isn’t blowing up with texts or messages or calls– or anything for that matter.

To borrow off the old TV western, “Have Chips and GPS. Will Travel.”

Likely, this will be a subdued year’s end. I’m not one for crazy shenanigans anyway. I prefer a few friends to a crowd any day. And I’d much rather be inside on a cold night like this anyway.

I’m currently accepting offers for New Year’s Eve 2014. Apparently, that beats waiting until the last minute like this year.

Here’s something to think about as you ring in 2014: “Write it on your heart that every day is the best day in the year”
(Ralph Waldo Emerson).

Now is the best day to be alive, to be thankful for being alive, and to live.

Don’t wait until 2014. Start now.

That’s all.

Oh, and happy new year!

One Second and One Year Later

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“What was intended to tear you apart, God intends it to set you apart. What has torn you, God makes a thin place to see glory” (Ann Voskamp, The Greatest Gift).

I just realized today that it’s been exactly one year today since I got hit by that car. And for those who weren’t keeping up with my blogs or my Facebook posts then, I got hit by a car. FYI.

I was crossing the street in downtown Franklin, ticket in hand to see The Perks of Being a Wallflower. I didn’t look both ways before crossing and stepped in front of a Ford Mustang. Hey, I only get hit by the finest American-made vehicles.

I actually only got side-swiped. It was enough to knock me down and to take off the side-view mirror of the car.

I felt worse for the young girl driving the car than for me. She was so apologetic and remorseful. And it really wasn’t her fault. I was the one crossing where there wasn’t a crosswalk, walking without looking.

Even now, it’s easy to wonder what would have happened if I’d waited one second. Just one second.

I’d have seen that movie. I’d have skipped a few hours in the ER. I’d still have roughly $1,600 in my pocket.

I’m sure you’ve done that.

Maybe it’s a word or a phrase spoken in the heat of the moment out of frustration or anger.

Maybe it’s a bad decision made in haste or out of desperation or anxiety or exhaustion.

Maybe it’s the friendship you ruined or the family member you drove off with an insensitive remark or unkind word.

Maybe it’s one false step on a slick spot in the garage or on a slippery patch of ice on some stairs.

You wonder what it would be like if you could just have that one second back to do over.

I know two things: 1) if you could go back, you’d erase every good thing that’s happened since, and 2) you can’t go back anyway (at least not without a 1985 DeLorean or some other time-travelling device).

What you can do is:

1) Be thankful that you’re still here and that you’re still alive and blessed with life and friends and comforts and (best of all) God Himself.

2) Remember that God can turn even the worst moments of your life into stories worth hearing, stories that make people want to know more about your God.

3) All really and truly is grace (something I borrowed from Ann Voskamp). Nothing that happens to you is in vain or needless. God works everything– and I mean EVERYTHING– together for your good and His glory.

I finally got to see that movie. My finger looks a bit funny but it still works. I look both ways EVERY time before crossing the street now. Life is still good, God is still great, and I am still very much blessed.

A Multiple Choice Quiz About My Life

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Surprise! Professor Greg is giving you a pop quiz about his fascinating life. Hint: all the answers to all the following questions will be d) all of the above. Keep your eyes on your own paper, no talking, and no gum chewing. Here goes:

1) I was recently interested in a fellow Kairos greeter until I found out a) she’s interested in someone else, b) she’s WAY too young for me, c) I’m perfectly content to be her friend for as long as God allows, and d) all of the above.

2) Tonight at Kairos, I learned that a) love is an action, b) Jesus calls me His friend, c) He calls me to love and forgive those who aren’t easy to love or forgive, d) all of the above.

3) My eventual demise will come from a) tripping over my cat, b) choking on a spoonful of Wendy’s Frosty, c) in a very non-heroic and non-graceful manner, d) all of the above.

4) True or False: Greg is one of the most awesome people alive. Hint: the answer is True.

5) Today, I’m glad that a) I woke up, b) I didn’t fall down, c) I am still forgiven and loved and held by my Abba Father, d) all of the above.

6) Jesus’ love for me is a) unconditional and unending, b) amazing, c) not meant for me to hoard but for me to share, d) all of the above.

7) Kairos is a) a worship event at Brentwood Baptist Church, b) at 7 pm every Tuesday night, c) something you need to attend weekly, d) all of the above.

8) Multiple choice tests are a) a pain, b) given by teachers too lazy to create real tests, c) a crapshoot, d) all of the above.

9) I always get ice cream at Chick-fil-A after Kairos because a) it’s ice cream, b) it’s free, c) it’s free ice cream (thanks to the Foursquare app on my iPhone), d) all of the above.

10) You are a) fearfully and wonderfully made, b) amazing and unique and beautiful and special, c) someone I am thankful for (and not just because you’re reading this blog and taking this quiz), d) all of the above and then some.

Sorry Seems to Be the Hardest Word

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“Forgiveness is the name of love practiced among people who love poorly. The hard truth is that all people love poorly. We need to forgive and be forgiven every day, every hour increasingly. That is the great work of love among the fellowship of the weak that is the human family.” (Henri Nouwen)

I’ve posted and blogged and mentioned multiple times before how the hardest person to forgive is often yourself. You know yourself too well and you know your own weaknesses because a certain adversary reminds you of them every single day.

I know I’ve blown it with a friend and the friendship won’t ever be the same again. We used to hang out and be good friends but now she won’t even sit on the same side of the room as me and we feel like really good acquaintances.

There are one or two (including that one at Starbucks) who have taken to actively disliking me and nothing I say or do will change that. For me, I have to remember that I can’t be friends with everyone and that it’s not my job to make every single person like me. It’s my job to be the best me possible.

But forgiveness isn’t optional. Not with others and especially not with ourselves. How dare I choose not to forgive myself when God (who incidentally knows me better than I do) has freely forgiven me? And why would I want to live under a cloud of condemnation when I don’t have to?

No one does relationships well. We mistrust each other. We read too much into silences and jests. We say the wrong things and fail to say the right things. Most of us have gotten used to the taste of shoe leather from sticking our feet in our mouths so often.

But real friendship between two believers is the Jesus in me communing with the Jesus in you. It’s practicing forgiveness and grace and blessing, giving these abundantly because we know our desperate need for all of the above.

You are not your past. Or your mistakes. You are not the names you’ve been called or that you’ve called yourself.

You are:

Redeemed

Forgiven

Blessed

Child of God

Beautiful

Beloved

To Die For

The One Your Abba Is Still Very Fond Of

May we speak not hurt but life, not wounds but blessings into each other. May we always look to see the best in ourselves and in others and call out the beautiful and glorious in each other. May we learn to love others and ourselves the way God has always loved us.

Learning to Listen Well

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I love serving at Room in the Inn at my church during the colder months of the year. It helps more than anything to get me out of myself and into a more others-centered mind frame.

Tonight, I went to a dinner where Dr. Ken Corr, Congregational Care Minister at Brentwood Baptist Church, spoke about how to effectively minister to the homeless. One of the takeaways for me was empathetic listening.

Empathetic listening seeks to understand what the person speaking is feeling. It’s where you step into that person’s shoes and hear the story from their side.

It’s not about giving advice or trying to fix their story to make it better. It’s not even about offering to give their story a better outcome. It’s certainly not about formulating your response (as I have so often done) so that you will come across as wiser and kinder than you really are.

For someone to tell you their story is a rare and precious gift. They are inviting you into their private world, letting you in to a place that few people have been allowed. You should value that trust and respect the gift.

But also, the gift of truly listening is equally a special gift to someone. You’re saying to that person, “You are not invisible, because I see you in your struggles and triumphs, joys and pains. You are not alone, because I am a witness to your story and I know where you’ve been and what you’ve been through.”

You earn the right to speak life and blessing into a person’s life by listening to not just their words, but the feelings behind those words. Many times, the person will be unable to understand their own feelings related to their story. You can share what their story made you feel and in that way help them understand their own emotions.

I want to be a better listener. I want to learn to listen to what you have to say, for that is one of the ways God often speaks to me. May we all learn to listen well.

Blog #1,161

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I still write these blogs as reminders to myself of how good God’s been to me. I am so very forgetful and prone to wander, prone to leave the God I love, prone to return to broken cisterns of doubt and fear.

I write about grace so much because I love it so much, and I love it so much because I’ve needed it and found it at just the right times. Left to myself, I can very clingy and needy, very co-dependent, and self-absorbed. I am an approval-addict. An affirmation junkie.

But that grace of God found me. And it did not leave me where it found me. I found that Jesus’ amazing love for me makes me loveable. I discovered that it’s more than okay for me to be myself. It’s the best form of worship I can offer. Just me loving being me. Me refusing to be conformed to what everybody else says I should be, to what the media tells me I need to be to matter.

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I will never stop telling the story of how Eucharisteo forged my miracle, how a lifestyle of joy and gratitude and thanksgiving opened my eyes to manifold blessings and allowed me to open closed fists to receive more of God’s riches.

I am blessed. Even if I never have a six-figure salary. Even if I am ever more the friend and never the love interest, the guy girls want to marry. Even if I never get another blessing or another visible reminder of God’s presence.

Here’s to 1,000 more posts to remind forgetful me of how good my life is and how great God is. Here’s to all of you who keep encouraging me, challenging me, and blessing me in ways I will never be able to repay.

Thank you.

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