turning 40

Feelin’ the Love

/ Ragamuffingospelfan / Leave a comment

I know Facebook can at times be a complete waste of time. I myself have spent too much time in the past growing virtual crops and selling virtual pigs and cows for (unfortunately) virtual profit. But on my birthday, Facebook shows its usefulness. I love each and every time I get a post wishing me a happy birthday. Every one makes me smile and makes my day.

Tonight, at Chick-fil-A, my birthday cake was a brownie with a lit match stuck in it. I loved it. I was feeling the love.

But what about all those facebook friends who didn’t send me birthday greetings? What about all those people out there who aren’t as easy to love? Those who are too broken to love back at all?

If you only are friends with those who friend you back, that’s expected. If you only love those who love you back, there’s nothing special about that. Even those who believe in nothing do that.

But when you love the unloveable, the unloved, and the loveless, you show yourself to be a true follower of Jesus. When you are friends with those people who are outcasts and uncool and misfits, you are loving with the love of Jesus.

When a husband loves his wife because she loves him back or when a friend loves another friend because of what the second friend does for the first, that’s not really love. That’s a contract. You do for me, I do for you. Love is a covenant.

Jesus loved us when we were outcasts, strangers from the Promise, without hope, alienated from God, and broken beyond repair. He didn’t wait until we loved him to love us; He loved us first. He showed us that His love was strong enough to take the most broken parts and make even those whole again.

We really and truly love not when we love out of a need to be loved or recognized. but when we are complete in Christ and filled with His love and that love spills out onto those around us. We really and truly love when our love isn’t feeling or wishing, but acting for the better of the other. When we do everything in our power, regardless of cost, to help the other person be all that Jesus meant for them to be.

I want to love like that. I hope and pray you do, too. I hope we move beyond love as a feeling and choose to love every day, whether we feel like it or not.

By the way, thanks for all the birthday love. If I knew it would be like this, I’d turn 40 every day.

Turning the big 4-Uh-Oh

/ Ragamuffingospelfan / Leave a comment

In less than six days, I turn 40.

Yes, I’ve heard that 40 is the new 30, and 20 is the new 10. I guess that makes 10 the new embryo.

I’m gonna be 40. Right now, I think I’m in denial. I’ve been telling everyone I am celebrating the 15th anniversary of my 25th birthday, which is true and sounds less ominous that the dreaded “turning 40.”

Am I where I thought I would be at 40? Not even close.

I’m not married. Or engaged. Or dating. Or even remotely close to dating (I’ve always heard that for dating to work you need to not only be attracted to someone, but that someone should also be attraced back. Funny how that always seems to be the case.)

Sometimes, if I let myself think about how far off-course I am from where I envisioned myself, it’s enough to make me uber-bummed.

But as I was reminded this week, God’s ways are not my ways and His thoughts are not my thoughts. As far as the heavens are above the earth, so His thoughts are that much higher than mine.

I see only a tiny part of the picture while He sees the whole thing. He knows where I need to be and He knows how to get me there when I am good and ready, and not one second before then.

Daily, it’s a fight to seek first the Kingdom of God and not my own itinerary. It’s hard to keep trusting in God when He leads me contrary to where everything in me tells me I should go.

Still, I know that even though I don’t know the way or how I will get there, I can trust the One leading me. I can look back at His proven track record and know that He’s got me.

I’m in Good Hands.