Room in the Inn

Getting Out of Yourself

/ Ragamuffingospelfan / Leave a comment

I overheard someone say that this time of year can be the most difficult and depressing time for a lot of people.

The holidays, Christmas and New Year’s, are over and the real world has started back up in earnest.

Maybe you’re one of those feeling blue. Maybe you feel like everyone else has gone back to their lives and forgotten about you. Or maybe you feel like no one has ever noticed you.

Maybe you’re fretting about where you are in life and wondering if you’ll always be stuck there.

You spend a lot of time, maybe too much time, thinking about yourself and your problems.

The solution? Is it to get over yourself?

I think not.

I think the solution is to get out of yourself. Go and serve others who are in a worse position than you.

I volunteer at Room in the Inn, a ministry that gives homeless men a place to sleep and a warm meal on bitterly cold nights.

I don’t say that because I’m so sanctimonious and holy. I say it because I’ve often been the one who needed an adjustment in my perspective.

Here are men who have way less than me, who are dealing with struggles and issues that I’ve never even dreamed of, yet many of whom have a way better outlook on life than I do (most of the time).

Often in serving, you seek to bless only to find yourself the one being blessed. You seek to minister and find that you are the one being ministered to instead.

Those who complain and who are bitter are usually the ones who aren’t serving. The ones who are serving find they have little time to spare for griping and cynicism. They also find that you can never outgive God or bless more than you are blessed, and that has a way of changing your outlook.

Also, sometimes depression can be more than just being discouraged. Sometimes, it’s a chemical imbalance issue. Never be ashamed to get help. Never be ashamed to confess what you’re going through to trusted friends.

Remember that God is with you in this to the very end. And beyond.

 

Tim

/ Ragamuffingospelfan / 1 Comment

  

It’s one thing when you look at the statistics about homelessness in America, but it’s an entirely different matter when you get the chance to talk with someone who’s homeless. Putting a face on any issue automatically changes how you see it. 

I met Tim tonight at Room in the Inn. He’s a gregarious and friendly fellow who has probably never met a stranger. 

He also found out recently that he has stage 2 colon cancer.

He’s the one who can cheer up just about anybody with his off-the-wall, zany brand of humor. He can make anyone forget about their problems for a while. But who will be the one to cheer him up now that he’s facing an uncertain future?

I’m fairly certain that my 3-year old niece has more teeth in her head than Tim does in his. He won’t grace the cover of any GQ magazines anytime soon. But I’d rather hang out with him than with any superstar I could think of, because Tim is the real deal. 

 When you look at numbers on a page, it’s easy to say that people are homeless because they’re lazy and undisciplined. But when you meet someone and see that he or she’s not that much different than you, then the issue becomes a bit more complicated. 

I bet you’ve probably met some without realizing it because many of those who are homeless may look and act and talk just like you or me.

If you want to make a difference, you can never go wrong with a little compassion and a listening ear. 

Most of these guys want more than anything to be heard and to be acknowledged. And boy, do they have some good stories to tell if you’re willing to listen. 

 It’s only by the grace of God that I’m not sleeping outside tonight. Before I close my eyes on my soft pillow in my cozy bed, I’ll be saying a prayer for Tim and thanking God for another example of how His blessings so often come in disguise.

 

A Moment of Whoa!

/ Ragamuffingospelfan / 1 Comment

Joey_lawrence-whoa

I had a Joey moment. It’s one where I literally almost said “Whoa!” out loud. I did said it in my head.

One of the men staying with us at Room in the Inn said something that paused me in my tracks. Proverbially, since I was already sitting down, but it got me thinking. Here’s what he said:

Sin has the letter I right smack dab in the middle of it, while Jesus has the word “us” in it.

There’s an I in sin. Right in the middle, which puts me in the center of my life instead of God. Sin is all about me doing things my way and setting myself up as the ultimate authority.

There’s an US in Jesus. As in although Jesus saves us one person at a time, He puts us together in community, what we sometimes refer to as the body of Christ. Jesus never saves anyone to live out their faith on their own, but in the midst of other believers. Simply put, we are better together.

Sin leads to isolation and loneliness. And as just about anyone can tell you, you are much more prone to temptations and pitfalls when you’re fighting alone. Jesus leads us to accountability and encouraging and mutual bearing of burdens. When we are together, we compliment each other because where I am weakest, someone else excels, and where that person may fall short is where my gifts and calling lie.

Beware of anything that leads you away from fellow believers. I understand that not all of us are extreme extroverts and some of us like times to be alone. But no one should spend all their time alone, away from others who can watch out for them and warn them of imminent dangers they might otherwise walk blindly into or possibly speak that word of encouragement that enables them to go on for one more day.

There’s an I in sin and and US in Jesus. It’s that simple.

whoa (1)

Ac-Cent-Tchu-Ate the Positive

/ Ragamuffingospelfan / Leave a comment

image

Sometimes, life will hand you lemons. You could make them into lemonade, but without sugar and water to go with it, your lemonade is really going to suck. Or you could freeze those lemons and throw them at all those people who really annoy you. Just a thought.

Maybe it’s a friend who really disappointed you and wasn’t around when you needed them. Maybe it’s a long work week where you seem to have not only two left feet but two left hands as well. Maybe it’s just a general sense of discouragement at where you find yourself compared to so many others.

Here’s the cure. Focus on the good things in your life, or as the old song says. accentuate the positive.

Here are some of my positives which may or may not inspire you to find your own (or you could just steal mine if you like):

1) I woke up this morning and got out of bed and got dressed and went to work. It may not seem like much, but I know a lot of people who didn’t get that privilege today.

2) I greet on Tuesdays at Kairos (a young adult worship experience) with some of the most amazing people, each of whom I am blessed to know and to call friends.

3) The three C’s essential to any early morning– coffee, chocolate, and caffeine. All three are marvelous.

4) I can pull out my Bible (or pull out my iPhone or my iPad and bring up my Bible app) and instantly be encouraged and motivated and strengthen at any time of day or night.

5) Instead of lamenting about how far I am from where I need to be, I can celebrate how far I’ve already come and who I am now versus who I used to be.

6) If I look through eyes of faith, I can always find blessings and joys stashed throughout my week and choose to live out Eucharisteo in every moment.

7) No matter how bad my day may suck, it will never last more than 24 hours. No matter how bad the week seems, it will never have more than 7 days. And that includes Friday and Saturday.

8) My cat Lucy is always happy to see me when I come home and loves to tell me how her day went. Ok, not really. She’s more the silent type, but still her presence is a great comfort to me.

9) I love seeing how my nephews and niece are discovering this great big world and their place in it. They are becoming who God made them to be and I love the previews I get of what that will look like.

10) I have my favorite places that always make me happy: my corner of the couch in the morning, downtown Franklin, serving at Kairos and Room in the Inn, and being around my family and friends.

Joy is a choice that I must make every single day. If I want my life to matter and if I want the people I live with and work with and play with to see a difference in me, the only way is me living out of joy and gratitude and thanksgiving at the never ending goodness and mercy and steadfast love of God.

And there’s those three C’s.

Learning to Listen Well

/ Ragamuffingospelfan / Leave a comment

image

I love serving at Room in the Inn at my church during the colder months of the year. It helps more than anything to get me out of myself and into a more others-centered mind frame.

Tonight, I went to a dinner where Dr. Ken Corr, Congregational Care Minister at Brentwood Baptist Church, spoke about how to effectively minister to the homeless. One of the takeaways for me was empathetic listening.

Empathetic listening seeks to understand what the person speaking is feeling. It’s where you step into that person’s shoes and hear the story from their side.

It’s not about giving advice or trying to fix their story to make it better. It’s not even about offering to give their story a better outcome. It’s certainly not about formulating your response (as I have so often done) so that you will come across as wiser and kinder than you really are.

For someone to tell you their story is a rare and precious gift. They are inviting you into their private world, letting you in to a place that few people have been allowed. You should value that trust and respect the gift.

But also, the gift of truly listening is equally a special gift to someone. You’re saying to that person, “You are not invisible, because I see you in your struggles and triumphs, joys and pains. You are not alone, because I am a witness to your story and I know where you’ve been and what you’ve been through.”

You earn the right to speak life and blessing into a person’s life by listening to not just their words, but the feelings behind those words. Many times, the person will be unable to understand their own feelings related to their story. You can share what their story made you feel and in that way help them understand their own emotions.

I want to be a better listener. I want to learn to listen to what you have to say, for that is one of the ways God often speaks to me. May we all learn to listen well.