reconciliation

From Hostility to Hospitality

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“He is the embodiment of our peace, sent once and for all to take down the great barrier of hatred and hostility that has divided us so that we can be one. He offered His body on the sacrificial altar to bring an end to the law’s ordinances and dictations that separated Jews from the outside nations. His desire was to create in His body one new humanity from the two opposing groups, thus creating peace. Effectively the cross becomes God’s means to kill off the hostility once and for all so that He is able to reconcile them both to God in this one new body” (Ephesians 2:14-16, The Voice).

Chris Brooks brought another fantastic message to Kairos tonight that I much needed to hear. It was rooted in Ephesians 2:11-21 about how we were once hostile to God and everything He stood for, but through Christ we have been reconciled and brought into right relationship with God.

His mantra throughout the last few weeks has been “And you . . . but God . . . all grace.” As in and you were lost and far from the promise, but God made you alive and redeemed a sinner into a son and now your life is all grace.

He said something again that struck me. He said that maybe those Muslims that we keep hearing about aren’t the greatest threat to Christianity, but it’s greatest prize. Maybe what they need to see is not our retaliation with further hostility but our hospitality in welcoming them with the gospel message the way God once welcomed us through that same message.

Only through Christ can an enemy truly be transformed into a friend and a stranger become a brother. Only through the grace and mercy of God can so many different kinds of people previously estranged from each other be invited to the same table to sit together and enjoy each other’s company.

So many times churches and communities of faith have looked like people encircled with arms locked, facing inward and more determined to keep the wrong people out than to let the right ones in.

The true gospel of Jesus Christ calls us to stand outward with arms not locked but outstretched in welcoming those who feel disenfranchised and alienated from every other group to come sit at the table of fellowship. We offer the same Christ to others who brought us along from citizenship to family to living stones in the temple of God.

I love that the gospel of grace is still for those who don’t quite fit in and don’t have their acts together. The message of hope is still for those who continually mess up socially and financially and in every other way possible. The truth that still sets us free is still for the outcast and downtrodden and used-up and for those who are still in bondage to the lies and addictions that were sold under the guise of liberation.

The gospel is still for you and me. The gospel is for everyone.

 

God with Dirty Fingernails

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I posted this on Facebook a year ago and was still blown away by how powerfully it spoke to me. I hope it speaks to you in the same way.

“As I looked out over the shivering crowd, I suggested that perhaps Mary Magdalene thought the resurrected Christ was a gardener because Jesus still had the dirt from His own tomb under His nails. Of course, the depictions in churches of the risen Christ never show dirt under His nails; they make Him look more like a wingless angel than a gardener. It’s as if He needed to be cleaned up for Easter visitors so He looked more impressive and so no one would be offended by the truth. But then what we all end up with is a perverted idea of what resurrection looks like. My experience, however, is that the God of Easter is a God with dirt under His nails.

Resurrection never feels like being made clean and nice and pious like in those Easter pictures. I would have never agreed to work for God if I had believed God was interested in trying to make me nice or even good. Instead, what I subconsciously knew, even back then, was that God was never about making me spiffy; God was about making me new.

New doesn’t always look perfect. Like the Easter story itself, new is often messy. New looks like recovering alcoholics. New looks like reconciliation between family members who don’t actually deserve it. New looks like every time I manage to admit I was wrong and every time I manage to not mention I was right. New looks like every fresh start and every act of forgiveness and every moment of letting go of what we thought we couldn’t live without and then somehow living without it anyways. New is the thing we never saw coming – never even hoped for – but ends up being what we needed all along.

‘It happens to all of us,’ I concluded that Easter Sunday morning. ‘God simply keeps reaching down into the dirt of humanity and resurrecting us from the graves we dig for ourselves through our violence, our lies, our selfishness, our arrogance, and our addictions. And God keeps loving us back to life over and over.‘” (Nadia Bolz-Weber, Pastrix)

Forgiveness and Grace in January

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“Forgiveness is the name of love practiced among people who love poorly. The hard truth is that all people love poorly. We need to forgive and be forgiven every day, every hour increasingly. That is the great work of love among the fellowship of the weak that is the human family” Henri J.M. Nouwen).

Have you royally messed up with a friend (or at least felt like you have)? Have you ever had someone “let you have it,” verbally blasting you with a post or a text?

Maybe you deserved it. Maybe not.

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Or maybe you’re the one who did the telling off. Maybe you got way upset with someone and spoke in pure anger and frustration. Maybe that person deserved it.

I have some questions for you and me.

1) Since when is the life of a believer about giving people what they deserve? Isn’t it supposed to be about giving those in your life the benefit of the doubt and extending grace?

Which leads to my second question:

2) Would I want Jesus treating me as I deserve? Would I even stand a chance?

I know the answers to the second question are: no, not long, and a snowball’s chance in hell.

Maybe I need to drop that stone in my hand and look in the mirror. I may look just like that person I intend to cast that proverbial first stone at. I may not struggle with the same sins, but my sins would make me just as guilty in the eyes of a holy God if not for grace and Jesus.

It’s one thing to call out a person in love when their actions don’t match their professed beliefs. It’s another to blast someone and assume sinful motives, which I’ve done too many times. And in this case, once is one time too many.

You will lose friendships through misundestandings. You will have “friends” who show their true colors when you act in the slightest unloving way or slip in the least. You will have those who will stick with you even when you yourself would have bailed on you.

I’m glad God doesn’t ever give me what I have coming to me or treat me as my sins deserve. Even on my best days, I’d still be in trouble. Because of my favorite word– grace– God looks at my filthy rags of good intentions and best efforts and sees the perfection of Jesus.

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Gosh, I do so love grace!

PS You will need to forgive yourself at some point. All of the above still applies if it’s you needing the forgiveness from yourself.

Texting, Dating, and the Lordship of Jesus Christ

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OK. Calm down. This isn’t any hellfire-and-brimstone blog. Don’t get your boxers in a bunch. Or panties. I just have some thoughts I’d like to share.

Have syou been pursued romantically by someone lately? How did you go about deciding if said someone was right for you? Did you go by gut intuition? Cues? Feelings? How about this one? Did you pray about it?

By praying about it, I mean did you earnestly seek  God’s will? Were you willing to submit to whatever Jesus told you? After all, if Jesus is Lord of your life at all, then He’s Lord of every aspect of your life, including your relationships, including who you do and don’t go out with.

Another question: have you been romantically interested in someone? In the course of pursing or being pursued by that person, did you ask Jesus’ permission? How can you possibly hope to find God’s mate for you if you’re not seeking His will over each and every potential dating relationship?

It goes without saying (but still needs to be said) that if you’re dating with the intent of possibly marrying this person, then you want to know God’s will on the matter and be willing to submit to it.

I’m not trying to be a killjoy. I just don’t want you to find out six months into the relationship that you’re dating the wrong guy or girl or that you’re stuck in a relationship that doesn’t work or where you end up with someone who doesn’t share your dreams and passions and (worst of all) faith.

In a totally unrelated matter, I’m still not sure what to make of this whole texting thing. Have you ever texted someone and gotten no response? If your phone is like mine, then it shows that the person read your message but chose not to respond. It’s almost like if you came up to me and asked me a question and I nodded like I heard you but instead of answering, I just stared at you. That would be creepy.

This is my take and I only expect myself to do this. I ALWAYS respond to EVERY text. I think it’s common courtesy. Good manners. I know if you’re one of those people who gets inundated with texts, it’s hard, but doing the right thing isn’t always easy. And I do understand that people lead busy lives and can’t always whip out their phones and text back, but hopefully within 48 hours you have some down time to respond back.

As far as relationships are concerned, when there are misunderstandings, it’s easy to find fault with the other person. Sometimes you need to do two things: 1) look in the mirror and make sure you’re not looking at a speck in the other person’s eye through a log in your own eye. 2) Sometimes you need to be the bigger person in the relationship and make the move toward making the relationship right again. For the sake of the relationship, it’s not as important to be right in your own eyes as it is to be reconciled.

There. I do these soapbox blogs periodically, so you’re off the hook probably until sometime in the fall. Or if I have a really good summer, maybe next winter.

Fear and Faith

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I’m not alone when I say that I have known fear and anxiety. Lately, I’ve heard several of my friends talk about their own fears and worries. I’m pretty sure that everybody deals with fear on some level.

But the question of the day is this: will you let fear run your life or will you step out in faith? Will you put your foot out into the air, not knowing if there will be ground underneath for it to land on? I know your mind just went to that scene in Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade. Mine did. That’s exactly what the step of faith looks like. It means either God comes through or you will crash and burn.

I think for a lot of people, their fear of failure is stronger than their desire for success. They want to avoid failing more than they want to succeed, and the result is that they will fail from not trying. Failing is not failure, but not trying is.

I truly believe that God reveals himself as we obey. As we can take those steps of faith, God knows we are ready to handle a much greater revelation of himself. We know much more of God’s ability to come though in the clutch when we go out on a limb for him.

So my advice is to do what you’re afraid of. Ask her out. Apply for that job. Make that call to your estranged friend. Share your faith with a co-worker. Quit that dead-end job and pursue your dream.

God will honor you. He hasn’t failed you yet and he’s not about to. Remember, as I heard recently, that if God is calling you out, he has already given you the victory there. You only have to step out and claim it.

Perfect, complete, mature love, i.e. the love of God, casts out fear completely.

Matthew 5:23-24 In My Own Words

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“This is how I want you to conduct yourself in these matters. If you enter your place of worship and, about to make an offering, you suddenly remember a grudge a friend has against you, abandon your offering, leave immediately, go to this friend and make things right. Then and only then, come back and work things out with God”

This is my interpretation:

If you’re in the middle of a worship service and remember that someone has offended you or upset you, or if you need to make the relationship right, don’t even finish the song you’re singing. Don’t wait one minute, but go to that person immediately and do everything in your power to make it right.

Wherever you are, whatever you’re doing, if you see that you haven’t been as good a friend or brother or sister or parent as you could have been, go make it right. If you realize you’ve been taking a relationship for granted, go make it right. If God brings to your attention someone you’ve been neglecting, go to that person and make it right again.

After that, you can truly worship. You can truly raise your hands to God in praise. Then you’ll be ready to see God work in your life.

God’s YES

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“Whatever God has promised gets stamped with the Yes of Jesus. In him, this is what we preach and pray, the great Amen, God’s Yes and our Yes together, gloriously evident. God affirms us, making us a sure thing in Christ, putting his Yes within us. By his Spirit he has stamped us with his eternal pledge—a sure beginning of what he is destined to complete” (2 Cor. 1:20-22).

So many people think that Christians are all about what and who we’re against. And honestly, we  haven’t done a very good job in dispelling that sentiment. We’re sometimes too eager to condemn the sin and not nearly as willing to love the sinner.

But I have to look at a guy like Adam Lanza and say with all honesty, “That could have been me. But for the grace of God and different circumstances, that could have been me.”

That scares me and comforts me at the same time.

It scares me because it means that I’m not nearly as good as I sometimes think I am. It means that I am just as in need of a Savior now as ever and just as prone to wander from the One I love as ever.

But it comforts me because God has promised to stick with me through everything. He’s stamped his YES on me through Christ and nothing will ever change that.

I think we would do better to show love instead of judgment. We’d do better to reach out to those in trouble instead of later saying thing like “I could have told you that boy would end up like this. I could see it coming a mile away,”

While we were yet sinners, while we were at our most unlovable worst, Christ died for us. He reconciled us to God and now gives us a chance to be a part of reconciling others, too.

I don’t know about you, but I want people to know what and who I’m for. More importantly, I really want people to know that God is for me and for them and has a new start for anyone who’s willing to take him up on it.

That’s all.

 

Forgiveness

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Tonight, Mike Glenn talked about forgiveness at Kairos. He said forgiveness is releasing the other person from the expectation that they can fix the wrong and the hurt they caused you. He said forgiveness is when you are no longer defined by the pain and the hurt and the grudge, but by the love of Jesus.

He added that Jesus said to him once, “You can hold on to the hate for the person who hurt you or you can hold on to My love, but you cannot hold on to both.” When Jesus whispered, “Father, forgive them for they don’t know what they’re doing,” He was praying for those who hurt you. He was also praying for you.”

We are called to forgive. Jesus said the Father would forgive you as you forgave others. When you don’t give forgiveness, you can’t receive it and you stunt the work of the Spirit in your life. Every single one of us needs to forgive and be forgiven.

But what if the person you most need to forgive is yourself? What if the person you need to learn to live with is you? What if you’re scared to death that if someone else ever knew you like you knew yourself and knew all the dirty, petty, angry thoughts you keep hidden, they would walk out on you for good?

I have been way too hard on myself in the past and projected on to other people my own self-rejection. I thought that no one could ever really know me and still like me. But the love of Jesus broke through and changed me and changed how I saw myself. It transformed how I saw others, no longer through my own insecurities, but through the grace of God.

The key is to believe what God says about you. It’s to believe that God loves you and chose you and calls you BELOVED. The key is to receive God’s forgiveness. If God chose to forgive you of something you never in a million years could have paid for, then it’s time to forgive yourself.

You have a choice. You can choose pain and holding grudges or you can choose forgiveness and freedom and love. I think Anne Lamott said refusing to forgive is like drinking poison and expecting someone else to die. You only hurt yourself. Forgiveness is freedom to love and be loved and mostly, to be wrapped up by the love of Jesus.

I choose forgiveness every time. Lord, grant me and all those reading this forgiving hearts and fill us up with your love so there’s no more room to carry the hurts anymore.

Amen.