physical attractiveness

All Those Celebrity Crushes

/ Ragamuffingospelfan / 1 Comment

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It seemed so harmless. You know. The game where you name your celebrity crushes? How can there be any harm in it?

But I started thinking more about it today. Probably more than I should have. After all, one of my spiritual gifts is over-thinking things.

I think the problem is this. When we get involved in those crushes, we are buying into the world’s definition of beauty. And it is a very superficial, surface kind that only goes as deep as the glossy 8X10 paper it’s printed on.

Dr. Michael Easley, one of my favorite teachers, always says, “Don’t let the world teach you theology.” I say, “Don’t let the world define beauty for you.”

Beauty is more than body shapes and skin tones. For me, beauty isn’t what’s on the outside transforming the inward, but what’s on the inside coming out on the outside. In other words, a woman whose heart is at rest and who is comfortable in who she is as a woman will show a kind of beauty that make-up and cosmetics can’t touch. A man who is confident in how God made him and who knows who he is in Christ will have a kind of handsomeness that is more than chiseled abs and sculpted arms.

Beauty is who you are more than what you look like. Beauty is character– joy you can’t contain spilling out of every pore and coming out as kind of a glow. You know it when you see it. And like I’ve said before, you have to look with a different set of eyes to see it. You have to be able to look at others the way God looks at you.

Another thing. Celebrity crushes feed into distorted and unrealistic expectations and standards. Girls don’t want a nice guy. They want a nice guy who looks like Ryan Gosling. Guys want a sweet girl who looks like Kate Upton.

The problem is that no one looks like that. Not even those celebrities. There is always photoshopping and touching up that goes into the image. Not to say that physical attractiveness isn’t important, but hopefully what you find attractive in a person will be kindness and grace as much as looks.

So I’m currently deleting all my celebrity photos. Most of all, I’m going to start praying that God transforms my character into one that will attract the woman He has for me. I’m praying you won’t get so caught up in looking for the perfect man or woman that you miss that imperfect person who could make you perfectly happy. I’m praying you will let God choose, for God always gives the very best to those who leave the choice with Him (thanks to Elisabeth Elliot for that one).

I think I’m looking for a face to call home.

 

Beauty and the Beholder

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Somehow, it seems to me that we’ve gotten it all wrong when it comes to romantic love. We look for the most attractive person we can find and hope that the attraction will lead to love.

But I think it’s just the opposite. Being loved makes you beautiful.

Think of the ultimate love that God has for us. His love calls out in us our best selves. His love calls out in us life and beauty and strength and wisdom.

If we are his children, then we can call those things out in each other, I think.

I heard a story of a guy who married a girl no one would ever have thought of as beautiful. But day after day, he called beauty out in her by telling her how lovely she was. In time, she came to be as lovely as he always said she was.

Ultimately, it’s not being lovable and lovely that brings us love. It’s in being loved that makes us lovable and lovely, as supremely evidenced in the transforming work of God’s love in us.

True beauty is beauty that lasts. It shows itself in kindness, gentleness, self-control, joy, peace, patience, and in so many other ways. It’s more than physical attractiveness which fades with the years. It’s about a beauty that’s within that shines out through a smile and a glowing countenance.

All this came from a movie. You may or may not have heard of it, but it’s called Enchanted Cottage and it’s about a man disfigured by war and a woman who is considered homely by just about everybody else, but love brings them together. Through looking with the eyes of their hearts, they come to see each other as handsome and beautiful.

That’s the way God has always seen you and me. May we as we grow in the love of God come to see each other that way.

Are You a 10?

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This morning on my favorite radio show, they were all participating in a beauty contest of sorts. It had to do with an iphone app that rated you on physical appearance on a scale from 1-10.

That reminded me of a time at band camp. A girl had a notebook in which she rated all the guys from 1-10. It got confiscated by one of the guys, who proceeded to read the list out loud.

I remember thinking something like, “Please don’t let it be a negative number. Anything but a negative number.”

I think my rating was a 5 or a 6.

How do you rate yourself? Probably if you’re like most people you will probably rate yourself too low. After all, you’re the one who sees that reflection staring back at 5  in the morning after 3 hours of sleep.

You probably have a list of things you wish you could change about your appearance. You may not even like the way you look and mirrors may be something you avoid like the bubonic plague.

But God thinks you’re a 10. Honest. For three reasons.

1) He created you with His own hands exactly the way He wanted you to be. You are His masterpiece.

2) He bought you back with the highest price possible– the life of His own dear Son. He didn’t consider even that too high a price to pay for you.

3) When He sees you, He sees the finished product of what you will be. He sees Jesus in you and is very pleased.

He doesn’t just love the Final you. He loves the Work-in-Progress you. He loves the you that feels invisible sometimes, the you that screws up a lot and says the wrong thing too many times.

You may not think much of you, but God does. He thinks you’re beautiful and dazzling and radiant.

He still thinks you’re to die for.