pain

Befriending Your Pain (from October 10, 2021)

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“I want to say to you that most of our brokenness cannot be simply taken away. It’s there. And the deepest pain that you and I suffer is often the pain that stays with us all our lives. It cannot be simply solved, fixed, done away with. . . . What are we then told to do with that pain, with that brokenness, that anguish, that agony that continually rises up in our heart? We are called to embrace it, to befriend it. To not just push it away . . . to walk right over it, to ignore it. No, to embrace it, to befriend it, and say that is my pain and I claim my pain as the way God is willing to show me his love” (Henri Nouwen).

C. S. Lewis said that God speaks to us through our pain. Oftentimes, pain is the only way for God to get our attention, distracted as we are by our pleasures and pursuits. Living in a beautiful but broken world, it’s not hard to find pain. God simply uses that pain to speak to us, to gently remind us that He is near, to mold us into something closer to His likeness.

The growth itself is painful as well. The transition from selfish to selfless, from hateful to loving, from carless to caring is never easy and is never enjoyable, but it is necessary. All growth of any kind hurts. But more painful is to remain stunted and unfulfilled all your life and to never realize your full God-given potential. So basically, there’s no escape from pain.

But God is stronger than the pain. After the pain ends — and all pain must end eventually — God remains. God works all things together for good, even suffering, and makes it all more than worth it in the end.

Worship

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“As long as you notice, and have to count, the steps, you are not yet dancing, but only learning to dance. A good shoe is a shoe you don’t notice. Good reading becomes possible when you need not consciously think about eyes, or light, or print, or spelling. The perfect church service would be one we were almost unaware of; our attention would have been on God” (C S Lewis).

Back in the day, the battle was between hymns and praise choruses or traditional versus contemporary worship styles. After much deliberation, I’ve decided that the answer to the question is yes. I like both. Both can lead us to the throne room of God and both can become a hindrance if we focus on them instead of the God we’re supposed to be singing about.

These days, the production value and musicianship in a lot of churches is top notch, rivaling just about anything you’d see in a concert venue. The only problem with that is that if the Holy Spirit is absent, would anyone notice? Would anyone care?

I’m not saying that artistry is bad in worship music. I’m not against fog machines or stage lights or guitar solos. But that’s not what true worship is. Singing songs is a part of worship but not all of it. It begins with a surrendered heart and a captivated mind. Worship is essentially declaring the great worth of God no matter where you are or what you’re doing. Cleaning toilets can be as worshipful as singing about Jesus in a room of thousands.

I think it comes down to dependence. I think the best way to prepare for worship is to show up hungry for God. Musical worship is the overflow of a life of continual praying without ceasing and giving thanks in all circumstances. It comes from a Romans 12:1 mentality of presenting our very bodies and selves as living sacrifices for God to do whatever He wants with.

The best worship services aren’t the ones where all the songs are first rate or where every singer and musician sings and plays flawlessly. It’s one where God shows up in a way where we couldn’t focus on anything else but seeing Him and hearing from Him and committing to obey Him no matter what. That’s true worship.

Gaining Contentment

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“If we wished to gain contentment, we might try such rules as these:

1. Allow thyself to complain of nothing, not even of the weather.

2. Never picture thyself to thyself under any circumstances in which thou art not.

3. Never compare thine own lot with that of another.

4. Never allow thyself to dwell on the wish that this or that had been, or were, otherwise than it was, or is. God Almighty loves thee better and more wisely than thou dost thyself.

5. Never dwell on the morrow. Remember that it is God’s, not thine. The heaviest part of sorrow often is to look forward to it. ‘The Lord will provide’ (Edward Bouverie Pusey).

You could almost do away with all of this except for the last four words: the Lord will provide. Everything else is leading to that point and it summarizes the whole thing perfectly in a nutshell. I confess I get a little annoyed with the King James-style wording, but the gist is don’t complain and don’t compare. Don’t spend all your time fantasizing about how you wish your life could be or how it could have been or should have been. Definitely don’t focus on what might happen, which 99 out of 100 times never actually happens.

If you can keep your eyes fixed on Jesus and not on you or your circumstances, you’re a lot better off. Those crashing waves can make us forget that there’s Someone walking out to us on the water, ready to rescue us when we go under. The remedy was in place before we asked for it. Our provision was provided before we had a need. The same God who was with you through a multitude of trials and is with you in your need is also ahead of you in a future that you can’t see yet with His answer that you can’t even fathom or grasp just yet.

Once you let go of your preconceived notions about how life should go and how God should act, there’s peace. Once you stop trying to figure it all out and finally surrender to God and His Kingdom, then there’s perfect peace. The worst that can happen is that you die and go to heaven to be with Jesus. The best that can happen is that Jesus is with you in the midst of whatever good or bad befalls you. Either way, you win because God wins.

More Amy Carmichael Wisdom

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“Let us end on a very simple note: Let us listen to simple words; our Lord speak simply: ‘Trust Me, My child,’ He says. ‘Trust Me with a humbler heart and a fuller abandon to My will than ever thou didst before. Trust Me to pour My love through thee, as minute succeeds minute. And if thou shouldst be conscious of anything hindering that flow, do not hurt My love by going away from Me in discouragement, for nothing can hurt so much as that. Draw all the closer to Me; come, flee unto Me to hide thee, even from thyself. Tell Me about the trouble. Trust Me to turn My hand upon thee and thoroughly to remove the boulder that has choked they river-bed, and take away all the sand that has silted up the channel. I will not leave thee until I have done that which I have spoken to thee of. I will perfect that which concerneth thee. Fear thou not, O child of My love; fear not.’

And now…to gather all in one page:

Beloved, let us love.

Lord, what is love?

‘Love is that which inspired My life, and led Me to My Cross, and held Me on My Cross. Love is that which will make it thy joy to lay down thy life for thy brethren.’

Lord, evermore give me this love.

Blessed are they which do hunger and thirst after love, for they shall be filled” (Amy Carmichael).

All I can say after that is that you need to go right away and find as many Amy Carmichael books as you can, as well as any biographies (especially the one by Elisabeth Elliot). Or better yet, read good books by missionaries who have invested lifetimes in the field for the Lord. Those are just about always worth it.

Rebuilding the House

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“Imagine yourself as a living house. God comes in to rebuild that house. At first, perhaps, you can understand what He is doing. He is getting the drains right and stopping the leaks in the roof and so on: you knew that those jobs needed doing and so you are not surprised. But presently He starts knocking the house about in a way the hurts abominably and does not seem to make sense. What on earth is He up to? The explanation is that He is building quite a different house from the one you thought of – throwing out a new wing here, putting on an extra floor there, running up towers, making courtyards. You thought you were going to be made into a decent little cottage: but He is building a palace. He intends to come and live in it Himself” (C. S. Lewis, Mere Christianity).

That changes everything, doesn’t it? What if the painful and the hard stuff were really God rebuilding us into a dwelling place fit for a King? What if what seemed like chaos was actually a reconstruction of sorts — God reshaping our lives into ones that live for more than just a paycheck or a retirement but instead for eternity?

We want the family and the white picket fence. God has a plan for all the nations that they might know and praise His name. His plans are so much bigger and better than ours. And the best part is that we get to be a part of it. God is working His grand plan for the universe and for mankind through His own people — you and me.

Whatever the hurt, whatever the cost, once we see the end result, will have been worth it. That’s why we can praise God in advance for what He’s promised in the future. It’s as good as done right now.

The Process of Holiness

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“We have seen what we are not, and what God wants us to be, but are we willing to be battered into the shape of the vision to be used by God? The beatings will always come in the most common, everyday ways and through common, everyday people. This means living the realities of our lives in the light of the vision until the truth of the vision is actually realized in us” (Oswald Chambers, My Utmost for His Highest).

I’m sure you’ve heard of the song about how everyone wants to go to heaven but no one wants to die, right? Well, this one’s called “Everyone Wants to be Holy, but No One Wants to Pay the Price for It.”

Not quite as catchy. But most believers want to be like Jesus. At least most say they do, including me. But far fewer are willing to do what it takes. More accurately, far less are willing to submit to the process that God uses to shape us into holy people.

The process looks a lot like taking a block of stone and chiseling it into Michelangelo’s David. Or when a silversmith purifies silver by sticking it into red-hot flames. Or when God puts hard circumstances and unkind people into our lives to teach us perseverance and patience.

I want to be used by God, but I’m less keen on being battered into shape for it. I’d rather skip right to the usefulness part and skip all the unpleasant part about God molding me into somebody useful.

A lot of it has to do with perspective. The way I look at the interruptions, delays, inconveniences, and hardships in my life says a lot about where my maturity level is. If I see them as hindrances, then maybe I need to grow up a little more. If I see them as the hand of God shaping and guiding me toward a greater purpose, then I’m getting closer to becoming who God created me to be in the first place.

“I’ve learned by now to be quite content whatever my circumstances. I’m just as happy with little as with much, with much as with little. I’ve found the recipe for being happy whether full or hungry, hands full or hands empty. Whatever I have, wherever I am, I can make it through anything in the One who makes me who I am” (Philippians 4:11-13, The Message).

The Purpose of Prayer

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“Every time we pray our horizon is altered, our attitude to things is altered, not sometimes but every time, and the amazing thing is that we don’t pray more” (Oswald Chambers, in The Place of Help).

Oswald Chambers also said something else that I’ve thought a lot about over the years. He said that prayer doesn’t so much change the things around me as it changes me and I change things. I think maybe I’d say that when I pray for God to change my circumstances, what I really want is a shortcut out of the difficult season. God wants me to endure the season so that I am changed by it.

It’s like the old story of the cocoon and the butterfly. If you “help” the caterpillar out of the cocoon rather than watch it struggle, you deprive it of the strength it needs to fly. When we pray for God to take us or those we love over an obstacle rather than through it, we are robbing ourselves of sweetness of learning to know God deeper through the struggle and coming out of it more like Jesus.

I don’t think my problem is not praying enough as much as it is praying the wrong way. I still pray to God like I used to write to Santa Claus back in the day. I have my list of what I want, and when the list is over, I’m done. But prayer really is so much more than getting from God as it is getting to know God. And getting to know myself in the process.

“Prayer is not getting things from God. That is a most initial stage; prayer is getting into perfect communion with God: I tell Him what I know He knows in order that I may get to know it as He does”(Oswald Chambers, Prayer: A Holy Occupation).

Turning the Wine Back into Water

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“Next to the Blessed Sacrament itself, your neighbor is the holiest object presented to your senses (C. S. Lewis, The Weight of Glory).

I’m guilty all the time of looking at people like they’re ordinary. I think that’s the default setting for the human race. We rarely if ever see anyone and see the image of God in him or her. We just don’t take the time to see beyond the surface labels of pretty, plain, fat, skinny, tall, short, etc.

I wonder what would happen if we could see people the way Jesus saw people. He didn’t see a stereotype or a caricature. Every time, He saw a unique individual with a story like no one else’s. He created each person with a one-of-a-kind purpose and plan that no one and nothing else can do.

He looked at you and me and thought we were worth dying for. Even at our worst moment in those times we wish we could take back or do over, Jesus still chose to go to the cross and lay down His life for us. While we were still sinners, the Bible says, Christ died for us.

I’ve been guilty of prejudging people before I’ve even had the chance to get to know them. Sometimes, I see the way they interact with others or maybe the expression on their faces. I’m sure I’m not the only one, but I’m also sure glad that Jesus didn’t judge me like that. He saw the absolute worst version of me and still loved me.

I wonder what would happen if we loved people like that. Maybe we wouldn’t have to hunt high and low for gospel conversations and opportunities to share our faith. Maybe people would seek us out and want to know more about this Jesus they see in us, even if they can’t put a name to what they see.

In the Furnace

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“One day we took the children to see a goldsmith refine gold after the ancient manner of the East. He was sitting beside his little charcoal fire. (‘He shall sit as a refiner’; the gold- or silversmith never leaves his crucible once it is on the fire.) In the red glow lay a common curved roof tile; another tile covered it like a lid. This was the crucible. In it was the medicine made of salt, tamarind fruit and burnt brick dust, and imbedded in it was the gold. The medicine does its appointed work on the gold, ‘then the fire eats it,’ and the goldsmith lifts the gold out with a pair of tongs, lets it cool, rubs it between his fingers, and if not satisfied puts it back again in fresh medicine. This time he blows the fire hotter than it was before, and each time he puts the gold into the crucible, the heat of the fire is increased; ‘it could not bear it so hot at first, but it can bear it now; what would have destroyed it then helps it now.’ ‘How do you know when the gold is purified?’ we asked him, and he answered, ‘When I can see my face in it [the liquid gold in the crucible] then it is pure’ (Amy Carmichael, Gold Cord).

Some of you are in the furnace right now. It might be the furnace of affliction, suffering, and pain. It might be the furnace of rejection and loneliness. Or it might be the furnace of unfulfilled hopes and dreams. Whatever it is, you can probably think of a million places you’d rather be than in that furnace.

But remember in the furnace is where you’re purified and sanctified. As much as I want it to be true, holiness doesn’t come from happiness. All those glorious spiritual mountaintop experiences aren’t what make you more like Jesus. It’s trudging through the valley where you learn and grow and become who God made you to be.

In one of my favorite books, Hinds’ Feet on High Places, the main character Much Afraid is sent out on a quest by the Shepherd and given two companions to help her on her way. Their names are Pain and Suffering. At first, she recoils and almost rejects them, but after some thought and reflections on the goodness of her Shepherd, she accepts their guidance. In the end, they are as much transformed as she is.

God takes what the world means to destroy us to strengthen us. He takes what was meant to set us back to move us forward. He takes what the enemy meant for evil, and He turns it for good (as the worship song goes). He’s working all things together for your and my good (even the crappy sucky stuff we’d rather move past and not have to deal with).

The end goal is for Jesus to see His likeness in us. For God to see His reflection in us and for the world to see God’s reflection in us as well. Then we know that we are truly being purified.

Live Gladly

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“The greatest honor we can give Almighty God is to live gladly because of the knowledge of his love”(Julian of Norwich).

I think one of the biggest turnoffs to faith is people who profess Christ but spend most of their days with sour faces and unpleasant dispositions. If you truly have been made alive by the grace of God, shouldn’t you be filled with joy?

I get that people have bad days, but even on the bad days there is good. Even the worst days have a little bit of good in them. I don’t think people should fake being happy when their lives are falling apart, but I think that people who know the peace of Jesus should live like it and live like it matters because it does.

I knew a man once who was a former pastor and a greeter at a church event I attended weekly. I found out that he was dying from cancer, but every time I asked him how he was doing, he would say he was fine. He never complained or whined. He showed up as long as he was able and served with a smile because he knew that cancer would not have the last word.

Looking back, I feel a bit ashamed because I know I probably complained about my life to a man who was in a battle way worse than anything I’ve ever faced. Still, he was gracious to me. He showed me Jesus in the midst of his own pain and suffering.

My prayer is that I can be like that. I hope I can exude joy so that people around me who don’t know Jesus will want to know where that joy comes from. That’s actually my prayer for all of us. May we be living billboards of grace whose lives preach just as good of a sermon as any words we could ever use. May our words and deeds (not one or the other but both) tell of a good God and a gracious Savior who can save anybody at any time.