letter

Dear Abba

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“Dear Abba,

Ten thousand things are already vying for my attention. Wait, actually make that ten thousand and one. Some of them are shallow — like what shoes I will wear today — but some of them are legitimate: lunch with a friend, a doctor’s appointment, responding to a letter. Still, they are all earthly things. So startle me, I pray. Burst into the compound of my senses and steal me away from the urgent tyrannies already seeking to keep my eyes fixed on things below. You died for me. For me. That is the one thing; nothing else compares” (Brennan Manning).

That’s my prayer, too. That I would be startled away from the tyranny of the urgent in my own life, to have my eyes fixed on the reason for both Lent and Easter.

I think that says it all on this Saturday before we celebrate Palm Sunday.

 

 

One More Letter to My Future Wife in 2016

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So, here I am again, writing to you. It’s been a while.

I confess that sometimes I wonder if you aren’t a figment of my imagination, if you really do exist out there at all.

Still, I keep holding out hope and praying for you.

I pray that you won’t let discouragement overwhelm you.

I pray that you know that the love of your Abba Father is exponentially greater than all the romantic loves in all the books, songs, and movies combined.

I pray you know your worth isn’t based on whether or not you have a ring on your hand or children in the back seat of your car. It isn’t based on your income or job title or net worth.

The Father has declared you to be priceless. Jesus has shown tangibly that you are worth dying for. That is your true worth, and I hope you remember it when every other voice tells you how cheap you are.

I hope and pray that you know that the waiting will be worth it. I know in my own heart that in my waiting I have come to see more and more that God is truly enough. I’ve come to know and understand that I won’t need you to complete me and you won’t need me to complete you. God is truly enough for both of us.

I also hope and pray you will treasure each day that you’re alive as a gift. I hope you can learn to be fully present to the present and not fixated on what’s past or what may yet happen. I pray you will find all that God has for you right here in this very moment.

Keep praying for me as I will keep praying for you. I still can’t wait to meet you one day.

 

House Hunters International: Narnia

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Aslan-and-lucy

I recently watched an episode of House Hunters International on HGTV, where a couple was looking to move to Scotland. I was sold after hearing the real estate agent’s accent, as I am a sucker for a good Scottish accent.

It got me thinking. What if they did an episode of House Hunters International set in Narnia? I do know that Narnia isn’t real in the same sense as Scotland or Germany or any of the other countries that you can actually find on a world atlas.

But just the thought of choosing a home in Narnia would be a cool concept. Maybe Mr. Tumnus could be the real estate agent. And the biggest selling point? A chance to meet Aslan.

In case you’ve ever wondered who Aslan really is, C.S. Lewis once received such a letter from a young fan. He responded thus:

“As to Aslan’s other name, well I want you to guess. Has there never been anyone in this world who (1.) Arrived at the same time as Father Christmas. (2.) Said he was the son of the great Emperor. (3.) gave himself up for someone else’s fault to be jeered at and killed by wicked people. (4.) Came to life again. (5.) Is sometimes spoken of as a Lamb…. Don’t you really know His name in this world. Think it over and let me know your answer!”

I’ve said it before, but I really believe Heaven will be a lot like Narnia. Or maybe I should say that Narnia is the best representation of what Heaven will be like that I’ve seen (or read). And the idea of it being like the first day of summer after the school term has ended perfectly captures that overwhelming feeling of joy.

So I think House Hunters International: Narnia is a winner, followed possibly by House Hunters International: Hobbiton.

 

Another Letter to Myself

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Last year at Kairos, Mike Glenn instructed us to take pen to paper and write ourselves a letter, to be place in a self-addressed envelope and mailed back, to us at some point in the future. The point was that you could see where you were back then and where you are now and how far you’ve come.

Mine came back today. Here’s what I wrote way back in 2014:

“Dear Me,

You probably feel like your life is headed toward a dead end. You feel like everything will always be as it is right now. You feel like you’ll never move out on your own or go on a date, much less ever get married. You feel like you’ll always be behind, trying to catch up.

Remember, God can take anything in your life and turn it to good. What seems impossible to you right now isn’t even remotely difficult for God. One day, you will look back and see God was preparing you for a future only He could see. Remember that you kept putting one foot in front of the other, trusting that God knew what He was doing when you didn’t.

God is good. His promises are always true, in sunshine and rain, joy and pain, good and bad, in daytime and nighttime, as long as forever lasts.

Don’t let your past define you. Don’t let failure define you. Don’t let other people (or even you) define you. Let the Abba Father who calls you His Beloved be the one who defines you both now and forevermore.

A slightly wiser version of you”

 

A Third Letter to a Way Younger Me

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charliebrown_writing

Remember that day you thought was your worst day ever? Remember how you felt like you were having a nervous breakdown? You weren’t. Just for the record.

Remember how you thought you’d made the biggest, most colossal blunder in the history or blunders? You didn’t.

As I learned tonight, the worst day ever can be the beginning of your best day yet to come.

You fin that the dreaded worst case scenario did not come to pass. No one stoned you. No one ostracized you. Nothing was lost that wasn’t replaced eventually by something 10,000 times better.

As Joseph put it, even when the worst got thrown at you, what people meant for evil and harm, God used for good. God took all those rough patches to make you who you are now and to help you start to realize all that God could do in and through you.

Even the worst days end. They are 24 hours long, just like your best days and your so-so days. You didn’t croak or kick any buckets. You are still here and those supposedly insurmountable problems and obstacles aren’t. Just you remember that.

It really is darkest before that proverbial dawn. It does get better and you will eventually wonder why you made such a fuss over it.

As I said before, naps are good. You don’t get a rollover plan on those naps, so take them early and often while you still can.

A Letter to a Younger Me

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measkid

Right now, you don’t like yourself very much. You don’t think anybody else does, either. You don’t like being you and sometimes you wish you could be somebody else. Anybody else. Or maybe it would be better if you didn’t exist at all.

You’re wrong.

You’d be surprised at how many people really do like you. You’d be even more surprised at how many people don’t think badly of you, because they’re too busy with their own pain and insecurity and doubt to have time to think about you that much.

If I could tell you one thing, it would be this: you be the best you possible. Those who matter won’t mind and those who mind don’t matter. It’s that simple.

You daring to be you is a beautiful thing.

You choosing to be yourself makes God smile because He made you that way and He never makes anything ugly or second-rate or worthless.

So take time to laugh at yourself and be a little crazy, a little goofy, a little uncool. Remember that everything really will be fine in the end, and if it’s not fine, it only means it’s not the end yet.

A Lenten Prayer by Brennan Manning

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dearabba

I just found this and it reminded me why Brennan Manning is one of my favorite writers of faith.

“In my first-ever experience of being loved for nothing I had done or could do, I moved back and forth between mild ecstasy, silent wonder, and hushed trembling. The aura might be best described as ‘bright darkness.’ The moment lingered on in a timeless now, until without warning I felt a hand grip my heart. It was abrupt and startling.

The awareness of being loved was no longer tender and comforting. The love of Christ, the crucified Son of God, took on the wild fury of a sudden spring storm. Like a dam bursting, a spasm of convulsive crying erupted from the depths of my soul. Jesus died on the cross for me.

Dear Abba,

Ten thousand things are already vying for my attention. Wait, actually make that ten thousand and one. Some of them are shallow — like what shoes I will wear today — but some of them are legitimate: lunch with a friend, a doctor’s appointment, responding to a letter. Still, they are all earthly things. So startle me, I pray. Burst into the compound of my senses and steal me away from the urgent tyrannies already seeking to keep my eyes fixed on things below. You died for me. For me. That is the one thing; nothing else compares.”

Two thoughts: 1) I must find out where  I can get this book and 2) I hope Easter Sunday doesn’t arrive to find me comfortable or complacent, taking God’s love for me for granted. I want it to shake me to my very core and radically disrupt my life. I want to be stirred out of comfortable ruts and compelled into a deeper, wilder, more passionate love for Jesus who didn’t not negotiate percentages on the cross, but gave absolutely 100% of Himself for me.

The Real Dirt on Relationships

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someone

No, this isn’t another one of those blogs on dating. Yeah, I know the typical cliche topic whenever you go to a singles group or Young Adult Bible Study is dating, relationships, and– the holy grail of all singles– marriage.

This is not one of those.

“If someone wants to be a part of your life, they’ll make an effort to be in it. Don’t bother reserving a space for someone who doesn’t make an effort to stay.”

I know we’re all busy. We have lives and jobs. Some of us have marriages and kids. Some of us have pets. We all have a plethora of activities and groups and social events we’re a part of. There’s still only 24 hours in a day and that’s not going to change any time soon.

But the harsh truth is this: if someone means something to you, you will find time for them. If you can’t (or won’t) find time for them, it means that they don’t matter. You may tell them they matter, but if your actions speak otherwise, that’s what the person will hear. Actions do speak far louder than words.

If someone doesn’t respond to your texts or posts, the same thing applies. I understand that you might not have time to reply in that instant, but if you care about the other person at all, you will find the time to respond. Even if it’s just “I got your text” or “Thanks, but no thanks” is better than nothing at all. To not respond at all is perceived as ignoring the person, and as we all know, my or your perception may not be reality, but it’s all we have to go on.

You do have to learn to let those people go who won’t make the effort to be a part of your life. And making an effort means making or finding time. Always. Embrace those who stick with you through your moments of temporary insanity, through when you’re not as easy to be around. Those are rare gems that don’t come along every day.

I should add that not every single relationship will be like this. Some healthy relationships involve people who won’t see or hear from each other for a long time, but when the two get together, it’s like no time at all has passed. My advice is to always in every relationship give the other person grace and the benefit of the doubt.

As I’ve said before, you can’t be friends with everyone. At least not in the sense of investing in people and cultivating meaningful relationships with them. You will either have many shallow relationships or fewer but deeper friendships that last.

Most of all, hold all of your relationships with an open hand and a surrendered heart. God will put some people in your lives for 5 minutes, 5 hours, 5 days, 5 weeks, or 5 years. Sometimes, you only get one conversation. Sometimes, you get years of companionship. Don’t try to hold onto someone God has only put into your life for a short time.

That’s all I have for tonight, just some things that have been ruminating in the old noggin of mine for quite some time.

A Letter from Jesus to His Church

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Disclaimer: If you’re looking for something warm and fuzzy and feel-good, this is not it. You can skip to the next blog, which will be about fuzzy bunnies and cute kittens.

I was wondering if Jesus wrote a letter to one of his churches, particularly the post-modern trendy churches popping up all over the place, I’d bet it would go something like this:

“I came to one of your services and sat in the back row. I felt unwelcome and unwanted. Nobody turned around and greeted me. Nobody even so much as acknowledged my presence there.

They sang songs about me with great enthusiasm, about how great I am to save and how mighty God is. The preacher spoke at great length about how important it is to know me. But I walked in and out of the building and no one even saw me.

You have an amazing facility with some of the latest technology. You have some of the best singers and musicians leading the worship and one of the best speakers to motivate my people. But if there’s no real love behind it, it’s all just noise. And I didn’t see much love.

I came as one of the least of these. The outcast, the loser, the nobody. The ones you say you love, but your actions prove otherwise.

Get back to loving the unlovely. Don’t just associate with the popular and the trendy and those who have it all together. Take time for the ones who are sitting by themselves, who are  socially awkward, who can’t do anything for you and probably can’t even say “Thank you.”

When you serve one of the least of these, you serve me. When you ignore them you ignore me.

Remember that I loved you when you were one of these. I loved you when you hated me, when your life was a wreck and you were hopelessly lost. Remember how that love felt and how it made you come alive. Then go and share it with someone who needs it most.

 

A Christmas letter to my future wife

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image

I’m still waiting for you. And did I mention the whole “not good at waiting” part? More accurately, how badly I suck at waiting? I’m getting better, but I am still very impatient 95% of the time. But I know that this waiting will not have been in vain when I meet you.

I keep thinking of our firsts– first kiss (obviously), first snow to hold hands and walk together through, first night in front of a roaring fireplace, first time we’re both snuggled under the same blanket. . . . so many firsts that are yet to come. The best part will be that we didn’t give up and settle, but held out and found out that miracles do still come true.

I am leaning to stop looking for you with my eyes, and look for you with my heart. I will look for you not through my own eyes, but more and more through God’s eyes. I want to fall in love with your compassionate heart and your tender spirit. Your beauty will be Jesus inside you shining through for the world to see. Or at least for those who have eyes to see.

Remember no matter what anyone tells you you are, you are a daughter of the King. You are royalty– a princess. Don’t let anyone ever treat you as less. You were worth every drop of Jesus’ blood not because of anything in you, but because Jesus set His heart on you and declared you worthy.

I think I am slowly but surely becoming the man who will capture your heart and be worthy of your love. I have bad days when I strive and fail and I have days full of grace when I am finally weak enough to let Jesus do it all. That’s all I can do.

I am thanking Jesus for you in advance and thanking you in advance for being faithful to Jesus and never giving up on me. I’ll be thinking of you a lot this Christmas.