Advice for the Healing

I have a word of advice for those in the healing process. Don’t rush it.

I know. It sounds a little odd. You’re probably wanting the pain to end as quickly as possible and to be able to move on with your life as close to normally as you were before.

But there is such a thing as healing too quickly. Kinda like when you have your wisdom teeth taken out and the incisions heal before the infection can get out (I borrowed that from Mike Glenn and Kairos).

You should want to be well and healthy and whole, not just functional and better.

You want Jesus to walk you through your pain, not give you a short-cut around it, so that at the end you can truly say that Jesus in you overcame that hurt and you will never have to deal with that particular issue ever again.

If you are dealing with something like approval-addiction, you may wake up one morning and feel like a million bucks. You may feel like the opinions of others don’t matter and you have finally conquered your demon.

But feeling like you’re healed and being healed are often two very different things. You can never trust feelings as a barometer for health, because feelings are fickle and influenced by so many things.

So, let Jesus take His time with you. Let others in on the process and let them speak life into you during this time. If you try to heal by yourself, you will never find true wholeness.

And believe Jesus when He said that He will finish what He started in you. You will be everything He made you to be one day soon and you will know what it’s like to live out of a wholeness that can only come from being hidden in Jesus.

That’s my advice for the day. And take two aspirin and call me in the morning.

Addictions: Lessons from Tonight’s Kairos

When you think of the word addiction, you probably think of the junkie with the needle in his arm or the guy staggering from a bar at 2 am, too drunk to even be able to walk in a straight line.

But maybe addiction looks like the man who works 80 hours a week every week or uses food as comfort to ease the pain he can’t handle. Maybe you’re like me and your addiction is the approval of others. Whatever it is, you’re not alone and there’s hope.

The story of recovery from addiction is the story of moving from slavery to freedom. The Bible says that you are a slave to whatever you choose to obey, whether that be God or a controlled substance or a relationship or a hobby or a career.

Whatever it is, it’s a form of idolatry. You are giving power to something or someone other than God to hold your life together. The thing is that nothing else has the power, the weight, to keep your life together and keep you from spinning out of control.

I loved what Mike Glenn said. He says that Jesus doesn’t stop by your unraveling life to inform you that you’re going to hell. He comes to you in your moment of greatest weakness and says, “You are Mine. You belong to Me. And you don’t have to stay here in slavery.”

You will never overcome addiction alone. You need someone else, whether that be an accountability partner or a 12-step group. It takes time and work.

Jesus died so you wouldn’t have to be beholden to anything ever again. He died to provide you a way out.

The hard part is that often Jesus will take you and walk you through the painful event or memory that you’ve been trying so hard to anesthesize or drown out or numb or run away from. He will take you through it rather than throwing you over it, and you face it and overcome it and never have to be afraid of it ever again.

If God is for you, who can ever be against you? No one. Nothing. And if God said it, that settles it, whether you believe it or not.

I have never been a drug addict or an alcoholic, but as a recovering approval-addict, I know that there is freedom and victory in the name of Jesus. I know what it is through His mighty name to overcome and triumph.

I am learning not to rush the healing process, but to believe that the healing is happening. There is joy in seeing the shackles and chains of addiction and strongholds fall away and you find that you are walking in freedom for the first time.

That’s what I pray for each of you– freedom.

Paying It Forward

There’s a story by Henry Van Dyke about a fourth wise man who gets a late start in his quest to find the Christ. In his journey to find Jesus, he is constantly delayed by stopping to help people in need. By the end of the story, though he never meets the Christ-child, he finds that he indeed was able to serve Jesus through all the people he touched.

In other words, he payed it forward.

How have you payed it forward today?

Maybe it’s sending someone an encouraging text for no reason at all other than you have been blessed by one.

Maybe it’s paying for your fast-food order and then picking up the tab on the person behind you.

Maybe it’s finding one of the homeless people on the street selling their newsletters and not only buying one, but giving them a cold drink on a hot day as well.

Maybe you make time for someone in your life that you’ve been too busy for lately and sitting down for a cup of coffee and conversation.

It could be any number of things. Whatever it is that God puts on your heart, don’t say, “I’ll do it tomorrow.”

No one is guaranteed tomorrow and that chance may never come again.

Don’t live with the regret of words left unsaid, encouragement not given, visits not made, and the blessings you missed out on because you didn’t act.

I’ve said it before but you will never have the time to be a blessing unless you make the time.

A special note for those who are going into ministry or missions: your calling is not just a future destination, but it’s on the way there. Your calling starts now with the people around you who need to see the Jesus in you.

So pay it forward today.

Judging

Have you ever felt like someone passed sentence on you and wrote you off based on something you said or did? Have you ever felt condemned by another because you messed up once too many times?

Then you know not to judge another in the same way.

You never know what a person’s been through. You never know the whole story of the journey that person has been through and all that God has called them to walk through. If you did, you would probably celebrate how far they’ve come instead of passing judgment.

I’ve been guilty far too often of judging. I’ve thought, “This person really needs to read this or hear this” or “I sure wish God would convict them of this particular issue.” Would I want someone else thinking the same about me?

I know I’ve done and said and texted and posted enough to get me booted off people’s Christmas card lists. I certainly have done enough to warrent being voted off the island and having people write me off and give up on me. That’s why I never write anybody else off or give up on them.

Mike Glenn spoke at Brentwood Baptist Church this morning about how everybody’s got a list of people the world would be better off without. Before you make your list, remember that you are most likely on someone else’s list.

I love what Max Lucado said: “I choose gentleness… Nothing is won by force. I choose to be gentle. If I raise my voice may it be only in praise. If I clench my fist, may it be only in prayer. If I make a demand, may it be only of myself.”

Who knows? Remember you may not have done as well in someone else’s shoes. You might not have survived. And you may still yet be facing someday what that person has already faced and overcome.

So, I choose gentleness and grace and understanding over judgment and condemnation. I choose to bless rather than curse, to encourage rather than to criticize, and to be a blessing to somone instead of seeking blessings from that person.

What will you choose?

Taking Every Thought Captive

“But the voice of truth tells me a different story
The voice of truth says, “Do not be afraid!”
And the voice of truth says, “This is for My glory”
Out of all the voices calling out to me
I would choose to listen and believe the voice of truth” (Casting Crowns)
Lately, I’ve been really convicted about my sin in not taking every thought captive and submitting it to the Lordship of Christ. Here I am committing to doing just that, with you as my witnesses to hold me accountable.

 I am naming these thoughts for what they are so that they will not only be taken captive, but lose their power over me once and for all:

1)     “My friends can make time for everyone else, but they don’t have time for me.” I renounce that as a lie from the father of lies, because I choose to believe the best about my friends and the God we both serve.

2)     “I’ve blown a friendship and my friend will never again want to hang out with me or see me again.” Nothing is ever as bad as my fears make me think and God is not only able to save me, but take care of me and sustain my friendships.

3)     “I am too weird and messed up to expect my friends to stick around.” I may not be normal (and I’ve never claimed to be), but in my God’s eyes I am exactly who He made me to be and He sees the perfection of Jesus in me.

4)     “Maybe if I try hard enough, people will like me more, and the harder I try, the more they will like me.” It’s not about trying harder or pleasing people, but about being the best me possible and pleasing God. If I seek Him and His reign in my life, everything else will be taken care of.

5)      “My  friend used to comment on my posts on facebook and text me more. Then it got less and less and now they never comment or like or text me anything. That must mean they don’t like me anymore.” It just means that maybe that person is going through a period of extreme busyness or a season of dealing with their own issues. Not everything is about me (thank God for that!)

Maybe you are believing different lies, or maybe you’ve believed the same lies I have. Don’t for one more second let these thoughts have dominion over you. Renounce them and name them as lies and rebuke their author in the name and the blood of Jesus.

I choose to listen to and believe the Voice of Truth. Will you?

What Do You Want?

At Kairos tonight, Mike Glenn posed this question: Suppose God shows up in front of you and asks you want you want, no limits and no restrictions. What would you ask for?

The Bible relates that happening to King Solomon. He could have asked for the death of his enemies or vast wealth. He probably didn’t need any more wives, so I imagine that wasn’t an option.

He chose wisdom.

What would you choose? What would I choose?

I want my answer to be as much of God as I can handle. I remember the verse in Matthew that says to seek first the Kingdom of God and all His righteousness, and everything else will be added.

That’s not saying that I will strike it rich or that a fabulously wealthy uncle that I’ve never heard of will kick the bucket and leave his gazillions to me. That’s saying that I will get what I need when I need it.

My growing desire these days is to hunger and thirst after God more than anything else. Before you start thinking how super-spiritual I am, let me rephrase that statement. I want to want to hunger and thirst after God more than anything else.

Happiness fades. As soon as I’ve found what I think will make me happy, the feeling wears off.

I want joy. I want the kind of joy that comes from being grounded in the truth of who Jesus is and who I am in Christ. I want joy that outlasts seasons of happiness and sadness, sunshine and rain (now you’re probably humming that song from the early 90’s), bliss and pain.

I want to be able to say (and mean it) that the Lord gives and the Lord takes away and my joy is the same, regardless.

What a lost world needs to see isn’t happy Christians, but believers so full of joy that nothing and no one can touch or take away. May we be so full of the joy and love of Christ that it can’t help but spill out onto those around us who need it.

 

 

Cutting Hearts

I spent my evening doing something that I honestly never thought I would ever do again in this lifetime. Something I hadn’t done in a very long time.

I spent it cutting out paper hearts. It was part of preparation for Vacation Bible School we’re doing down at Set Free Church, a ministry that helps homeless men find their way back and helps heal families.

Then I got to thinking. Isn’t that sort of what God is doing with my own heart?

I don’t mean that God is using literal scissors, although at times that’s what it feels like.

I mean that God is in the process of reshaping and remolding my heart into one that can He can use to reach out to the people around me.

Sometimes, that means my heart gets broken. I’ve had countless times where my love for another went unreturned. I’ve had times when a dream I cherished got dashed to pieces.

More often than not, it means a snip here and there. I lose a bit of my selfishness and make room for doing for others without expecting anything in return. I lose the need to always be acknowledged and loved and learn to love and serve those who may never be able to repay me.

Ultimately, it’s about my heart looking like God’s own heart. It’s about my heart beating with His heartbeat and feeling His feelings and loving those He loves with His own perfect love.

It’s a lifelong process that involves Him chiseling away at my hard heart while softening it at the same time.

That’s my prayer for you, too. That you would have God’s own heart beating within you to love the unloveable and reach out to the hopeless and helpless and show the world that no one is beyond the reach of God’s power to heal and change and transform.

I know, because I was one of those hopeless ones at one point. So were you.

Lost

“Only love has saved me now

Turned my fear to holy ground

I was lost but now am found

Only love has saved me now”

I was lost.

I was the lost sheep that the Shepherd left the other 99 to go and find. I was the one who wandered away, who thought I knew better than the very Shepherd who had led me all the way to this point. Still, He came for me.

I was the lost coin that the woman turned the house upside down to find. In my own eyes, I wasn’t worth very much but in her eyes I was worth every bit of effort it took her to find me.

I was the younger son who ran away and blew my inheritance. I wanted out and to be on my own. I was the one who finally came to his senses and made my way shamefully back home, rehearsed speech in hand, only to have my own father that I denied and disowned come running up to me and throw his arms around me and love me more than ever.

I was the older son who stayed, but rebelled in his heart. I dutifully kept the rules and thought that entitled me to something. I was so caught up in doing the right thing that I missed grace when I saw it with my own eyes.

I am found.

I am learning what it means to be valued in God’s eyes. I am finding out what it means when He calls me Beloved and tells me I was worth every bit of what He paid to win me back.

I am learning to see other people the same way. Not as those who can meet my needs and make me feel validated, but those whom God has placed alongside me for me to bless and encourage and be Jesus to every step of the way.

I once was lost but now I’m found.

Amen.

5 Minutes

I’ve been trying to lose weight and get in shape. Lately, that means putting in an hour on the elliptical. For me, that’s a lot.

Some mornings, I feel there’s no way I can last that long. So I try for the first 5 minutes. After that, I try for 10. And so forth. If I break an hour down into 5-minute segments, it’s not nearly so bad.

Life is like that.

Some days, you think there’s no way you can survive for the next 24-hours. You feel completely and utterly overwhelmed. Don’t try. Just take the next 5 minutes and breathe deeply and slowly and think to yourself, “I can survive the next 5 minutes.”

Sometimes, you are held captive by your fears telling you that you’ve really messed it up this time and that friend is gone for good. It’s tempting to try and fix what really isn’t broken (which never works, by the way). Or you take the next 5 minutes and are able to start seeing the cracks in the fabric of that lie.

You can do anything for 5 minutes. You can pray or be silent or wait. You can breathe slowly and deeply. You can remember one blessing God has given you and dwell on that.

When I’m stressed out and can’t sleep, 5 minutes of meditating on the goodness of God can make all the difference. It can take me from almost falling back into my old approval-addiction, “nobody likes me” trap to remembering that I am still blessed with family and friends who surprise me all the time in unexpected ways with grace at every turn.

So set your stopwatch or your phone for 5 minutes. It may be a small start, but sometimes all Jesus needs in your life is the smallest place to start. Then He can do amazing things in your life.

I am living proof of that.

 

Questions to Ponder

I’m still thinking about Kairos Roots and some of the questions asked that night. I know with it getting up to 109 today, it’s probably still too hot to do any serious pondering, but here’s a few questions to mull over (if you still have the energy).

1) Who are you imitating? Who do you see on your television or in your social circles that you want to be like? I know a few people who have impacted me in such a way that I want to be more like them. Some are older, some are younger. The main thing for me is that I see aspects of Christ in them that I want more of in me.

2) How do you spend your time and who do you spend it with? Are the people you hang out with driving you to or away from Christ. Do they bring out the best or the worst in you? Do they bring out the Jesus in you?

3) Who do you take great pleasure and joy in? There are a few people in my life that whenever someone mentions their name, I automatically smile and my heart warms inside me. I thank God everytime their names come to mind.

4) Who are you investing in right now? Who is better off for knowing you and being around you? Are they more like Jesus from knowing you? Are they drawing closer to Christ through your influence?

5) Who is imitating you (and would you knowingly want them to imitate you)? When I say “imitate,” I mean they copy not just your best behavior when you’re really trying to impress people, but all your behavior, including what you say and how you act when life doesn’t go your way and you don’t get any breaks.

Some of the questions are more convicting than others. It’s easy to find people to imitate and who bless and encourage you, but much harder to be the kind of person you want people around you imitating. It’s not as easy to be the person who seeks to be a blessing and encourager more than seeking blessing and encouragement.

I have to remember this. Growing up is a lifelong process and if you don’t have it all down right now, you can be encouraged that at least you’re taking baby steps in the right direction. I will always be rooting for you and believing the best for you.

You can count on that.