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I Hate Goodbyes

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I hate goodbyes.

Even though part of me knows that the ending of one thing often brings the beginning of something new and better, I still want to hold on to the old.

Even though part of me realizes that nothing on this side of eternity can last, I still want little pockets of my life to stay the same, for certain people in my life to always stay the same age and never get older. That’s probably the same part of me that still thinks fat ol’ Santa climbs down the chimney to bring me my presents.

Goodbyes are never easy. Tonight was no exception.

We said goodbye to Mike Glenn as Kairos pastor. I understand that it was time for a change. I understand that Kairos needed fresh blood and a new vision. I understand that you can’t keep doing things the same old way year after year and hope for different outcomes.

That doesn’t mean I don’t think it sucks.

People who have been out there in the dating world know how hard it is to say goodbye to relationships. Sometimes even to the dream of a relationship. It’s gut-wrenchingly hard to say goodbye to loved ones who pass away, like aunts and uncles and parents. I can’t begin to imagine what it’s like to say goodbye to your child.

The part that I keep holding on to when unexpected (and sometimes unwanted) change comes is that there is no goodbye in God’s love for me. There is no end to that enless love that won’t let me go. It even holds on to me when I’m doing everything in my power to let go of it.

I can’t envision a scenario in any future where goodbye will ever be an easy word to say. I don’t want to ever get used to saying goodbye.

I know when it comes to my Abba Father and His unconditional extravagent love for me, I never will.

 

 

More Musings About Music

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So, I hear there was some kind of awards ceremony tonight for the music industry. Something called the Grannies? The Grammys? Something like that.

Anyway, I skipped it like I’ve skipped the last few. To my ears, the music that gets played on the radio sounds like a lot of ear candy– sorta like cotton candy set to a beat. If you like current top-40 music, more power to you. It just isn’t for me.

I like my music more off the beaten path. One of my favorite singer-songwriters is Lori McKenna, whose album Lorraine is (in my opinion) a clinic in what good songwriting sounds like. I highly recommend it. Now if I can only find it in my considerable collection of music.

I also like to go back and revisit music that I listened to in the past. I find that I hear it with a different set of ears and that I appreciate it in a new way.

I still think that nothing is more powerful than a song that tells my story and that speaks my thoughts. It’s sometimes almost like having my diary set to music. Sometimes it’s a little scary how close they get.

That’s why I think if I had to choose between movies, books, and music, I’d probably go with music. Music is the only media that affects every area of the brain. Or so I’ve read on the internet, so it must be true.

PS I found that Lori McKenna album. It will probably find its way into the rotation on my homeward commute at some point in the very near future.

More to come later on what I’m discovering and listening to in the wonderful world of music.

 

What Love Is

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“Moons and Junes and Ferris wheels
The dizzy dancing way you feel
As every fairy tale comes real
I’ve looked at love that way

But now it’s just another show
You leave ’em laughing when you go
And if you care, don’t let them know
Don’t give yourself away

I’ve looked at love from both sides now
From give and take, and still somehow
It’s love’s illusions I recall
I really don’t know love at all” (Joni Mitchell)

It’s Valentines Day, a. k. a. Single Awareness Day. It’s great for those who are in relationships (or who still have great hopes of relationships). For those who are perpetually single who spend way too much time with their cats? Not so much.

Still, I’ve been around enough to know what real love is and is not. So I thought I’d share some of my thoughts on the matter.

Love is not a feeling. Well, it is, but it’s so much more than that. I heard a pastor today say that love involves the head, the heart, and the hands. Love is primarily a choice, an act of the will– that’s the head. It’s also emotions– that’s the heart. It always leads to acts of selflessness– that’s the hands.

Love is not just romantic. There’s brotherly love and comfort love and– best of all– that unconditional love that always starts and ends with God.

If I say I love someone, that means more than a warm fuzzy feeling or a Hallmark sentiment. It is a decision to place that person’s welfare above my own, to do everything in my power to help that person realize all their potential and help them to become everything God created them to be.

That’s love.

If you want to define love, you begin and end with God’s ultimate expression of Himself in the person of Jesus. He gave up absolutely everything for you and me. His sacrifice forever set the tone of what true love should look like.

I believe love isn’t Romeo and Juliet dying for passion, but the old couple down the street growing old together. it’s the man with arthritis painting the toenails of his wife who has Alzheimer’s and can’t begin to repay him, much less express thanks for what he’s done.

Love is always sacrifice. Ultimately, love means you give without expecting anything in return. The final word on love is Jesus dying on a cross for people who would ultimately reject His sacrifice and many more who accept it and then take it for granted. Yet, that love perseveres.

That’s love. I don’t completely understand all of it, but I know that I can only love someone else if God first loved me and His love in me flows out to the other person.

I definitely know I want more of it.

 

 

John 3:16

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“For God expressed His love for the world in this way: He gave His only Son so that whoever believes in Him will not face everlasting destruction, but will have everlasting life” (John 3:16 VOICE).

Life. That’s what it’s all about.

Finding it. Living it. Sharing it.

I’ll be honest. I wouldn’t have chosen to insert all of John 3:16. I’m quite fond of the part about everlasting life. I’m all for that.

It’s the part about everlasting destruction that I would have left out. It’s not my favorite part.

Some have chosen to omit that part from their theology. It makes them uncomfortable. It rubs them the wrong way.

Here’s the thing. If you want the true Gospel of Jesus Christ, you have to take all of it. The good, the bad, and the parts that make you uncomfortable.

Here’s another thing. Those that get everlasting destruction choose it. C. S. Lewis once said that some will say to God, “Thy will be done,” and God will say to some, “Thy will be done.”

In other words, God will respect whatever decision a person makes, whether that is for or against Him. It’s called free will.

I don’t pretend to fully understand why God operates the way He does, but to say that God would never do something because I would never do it is to put myself in a position above God, to be His judge. I know I don’t want that responsibility.

So there it is. If you take anything away from this, it’s that the Gospel of Jesus Christ is all about a choice. It’s not your parents’ choice or your friends’ choice. It’s yours.

Decide today whether or not you really want to follow Jesus and surrender everything to Him. I chose Jesus because He chose me first long before I was born. But that’s another topic for another day.

The end.

 

Words That Create (More Goodness from Henri Nouwen)

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“Words, words, words. Our society is full of words: on billboards, on television screens, in newspapers and books. Words whispered, shouted, and sung. Words that move, dance, and change in size and color. Words that say, ‘Taste me, smell me, eat me, drink me, sleep with me,’ but most of all, ‘buy me.’ With so many words around us, we quickly say: ‘Well, they’re just words.’ Thus, words have lost much of their power.

Still, the word has the power to create. When God speaks, God creates. When God says, ‘Let there be light’ (Genesis 1:3), light is. God speaks light. For God, speaking and creating are the same. It is this creative power of the word we need to reclaim. What we say is very important. When we say, ‘I love you,’ and say it from the heart, we can give another person new life, new hope, new courage. When we say, ‘I hate you,’ we can destroy another person. Let’s watch our words” (Henri Nouwen).

Choose your words carefully. Speak life and not death. Speak hope and not despair.

Even your lack of words can have tremendous power. Your choosing to ignore someone sends a more powerful message than any words of hate ever could.

So choose words that head and not harm. Choose words that will build up and not tear down.

That’s all I have on this Thursday evening in February.

 

An Unexpected Detour

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Im-Lost-Ive-Gone-To-Look-Inspirational-Life-Quotes

I have my homeward trek fairly down pat by now. At least you’d think I had it down after all the times I’ve made the afternoon commute.

Today, for some reason known only to God, I took I-40 East instead of I-40 West. Immediately, I knew I’d messed up.

Still, I looked for anything familiar and found the exit for Stewarts Ferry Pike and the Tennessee School for the Blind, which I pass every morning on my morning commute to work.

It was probably a bit out of the way, but I got back to where I started (almost) and made it home from there. All it took was finding something familiar.

I think all of us get lost on our spiritual journeys. We get to where nothing looks familiar and wonder how we got to the place where we find ourselves. We wonder how to get back to what we know.

I truly believe God will give familiar signposts to those who have lost the way and seek to find their way back. He will send an old friend or a familiar Scripture or a song from the past.

Many times, we find that Jesus will show us that He Himself is the way back. For those who are lost, the best way back is to return to the trust and obedience we knew before we got off-track.

I know that for those who get lost when driving, nothing is more comforting than finding that familiar landmark. Suddenly, you know where you are and you can navigate from there.

I believe that just as much as His lost children long to return to places they know, the Father longs to get them there. The Father longs to see them running down the dirt road into His arms, just as that prodigal son did all those years ago.

If there are people in your life who have lost the way, maybe you’re the signpost that will get them finally headed in the right direction again.

PS I survived day one of my Lent fast from social media. I resisted the urge to check my Facebook page several times throughout the day. So far, so good.

Forgiveness on Repeat

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“Nothing worth doing is completed in our lifetime; therefore, we are saved by hope. Nothing true or beautiful or good makes complete sense in any immediate context of history; therefore, we are saved by faith. Nothing we do, however virtuous, can be accomplished alone; therefore, we are saved by love. No virtuous act is quite as virtuous from the standpoint of our friend or foe as from our own; therefore, we are saved by the final form of love, which is forgiveness” (Reinhold Niebuhr).

“Forgiveness is the fragrance that the violet sheds on the heel that has crushed it” (Mark Twain).

“Forgiveness is the answer to the child’s dream of a miracle by which what is broken is made whole again, what is soiled is made clean again” (Dag Hammerskjold).

I’m still a big fan of forgiveness, because I still need it very much every single day.

I’m no worse than anyone else, but I also have a front-row seat to my own bad choices, bad motives, and poor decisions. I know that God has a lot to forgive in me, and I’m forever grateful that He still does.

My question for me is this: what has anyone ever done to me that tops what I’ve done to God? If God can forgive me for a billion dollar-sized debt of failures and regrets, how can I not forgive what amounts to a few measly dollars (in comparison) of those who’ve wronged me?

I forgive because I fail. I know there will be too many times when I will need that forgiveness not just from God but also from others. So I forgive.

Holding back forgiveness doesn’t hurt the other person. It does hurt you. It holds you back. It keeps you from growing and moving forward. The best illustration is that unforgiveness is like drinking poison and expecting someone else to die from it. Ultimately, that kind of bitterness is fatal to only one person– you.

So forgive, not because the other person deserves it– or even asks for it– because you need it for peace of mind and resolution. So you can finally move on and embrace the next place God has for you.

The end.

Changes 2.0

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Once again, I find myself facing changes that I’m not ready to face. But then again, when am I really ever completely ready for changes when they happen?

Next week is Mike Glenn’s last week as Kairos Pastor. It still doesn’t seem real. I can’t begin to imagine Kairos without Uncle Mikey. But starting February 16, it will be a reality to which I’ll have to adjust.

I’ve had friendships that ended because the other person moved away or simply drifted out of my life. Even now, I wish I could go back and do things differently for some of them. Still, life moves on. Maybe our paths weren’t meant to stay parallel forever. Maybe God has something different and better for the other person that neither of us can see right now.

I’m reminded once again that the only constant in this life is that everything will change and nothing will ever stay the same.

Well, not exactly.

Jesus is the same yesterday, today, and forever. He is the constant in a world of change.

That’s what I’m holding on to when I face new circumstances. It’s what I cling to when I feel like I have nothing solid to hang on to in my life.

So beside death and taxes, one more thing is sure. Jesus will fulfill all His promises in and through me. I can count on that.

With that in mind, I can look forward to the future with great confidence. Kairos is in good hands with Chris Brooks. I am in good hands with Jesus. There is no mistake, no tragedy, no loss that Jesus can’t redeem and transform into something way better than I or anyone else ever dreamed possible.

That’s a good thought to send me off to sleep tonight. I hope it will be for you as well.

 

A Good Sunday

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All in all, it was a good Sunday. The Church at Avenue South was packet to capacity again as Doug Jones, the campus pastor for The Church at Woodbine, stepped in and filled in for Aaron Bryant, who is currently on a short-term mission trip in Israel.

Based on what I heard today, I’m excited for The Church at Woodbine and the direction they are headed. After several years of declining membership, they are finally back on the upswing.

I think the temperature got up into the 70s. That’s about 20 degrees higher than normal for this time of year in Middle Tennessee. Do you hear me complaining? I don’t think so.

I was supposed to lead a small group tonight, back at Ave South. I was expecting maybe about two others to show up. I was wrong. It ended up being just me sitting in the dark at Ave South watching music videos on Facebook, thanks to the most bodacious wi-fi the church offers.

Was it a waste of my time? Probably. Another way to look at it is I got a chance to get in some quality alone time in a very peaceful and serene setting. Plus, I had good music to get me there and back home, so that’s a win.

As usual, perspective goes a long way. The glass is either half full or half empty. You can choose to focus on the bad or see the good. I choose to be a half full, see the good kind of guy. Life’s a lot more fun that way.

Better yet, the way to look at life is to see it as a glass always brimming over because that’s what the life of faith through grace looks like. God is always good and we are always blessed and there is more than enough for those who know how and where to look.

That’s what I choose.

 

A Very Simple Note

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Every now and then, it’s good to go back to the classics and read what has stood the test of time. These words were penned by Amy Carmichael and I believe God still speaks through them today:

“Let us end on a very simple note: Let us listen to simple words; our Lord speak simply: ‘Trust Me, My child,’ He says. ‘Trust Me with a humbler heart and a fuller abandon to My will than ever thou didst before. Trust Me to pour My love through thee, as minute succeeds minute. And if thou shouldst be conscious of anything hindering that flow, do not hurt My love by going away from Me in discouragement, for nothing can hurt so much as that. Draw all the closer to Me; come, flee unto Me to hide thee, even from thyself. Tell Me about the trouble. Trust Me to turn My hand upon thee and thoroughly to remove the boulder that has choked they river-bed, and take away all the sand that has silted up the channel. I will not leave thee until I have done that which I have spoken to thee of. I will perfect that which concerneth thee. Fear thou not, O child of My love; fear not.’

And now…to gather all in one page:

Beloved, let us love.

Lord, what is love?

Love is that which inspired My life, and led Me to My Cross, and held Me on My Cross. Love is that which will make it thy joy to lay down thy life for thy brethren.

Lord, evermore give me this love.

Blessed are they which do hunger and thirst after love, for they shall be filled” (Amy Carmichael).