feelings

Feeling Something

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“It is quite right that you should feel that ‘something terrific’ has happened to you (It has) and be ‘all glowy.’ Accept these sensations with thankfulness as birthday cards from God, but remember that they are only greetings, not the real gift. I mean, it is not the sensations that are the real thing. The real thing is the gift of the Holy Spirit which can’t usually be—perhaps not ever—experienced as a sensation or emotion. The sensations are merely the response of your nervous system. Don’t depend on them. Otherwise when they go and you are once more emotionally flat (as you certainly will be quite soon), you might think that the real thing had gone too. But it won’t. It will be there when you can’t feel it. May even be most operative when you can feel it least” (Collected Letters of C.S. Lewis Volume III, C.S. Lewis).

The problem with a faith based on feelings is that those feelings are fickle and subject to change. I mean, have you ever tried to sustain a single emotion over a 24-hour period? You can’t. You can’t make yourself feel anything indefinitely.

Also, I’ve learned that feelings can lie. What you feel at any moment can stem from something you ate yesterday that didn’t agree with you. I’ve noticed I might trend more toward negative emotions when I am tired or hungry or bored. Typically, I can’t trust what I’m feeling when I haven’t slept well the night before. I especially have learned from experience not to post any social media or respond to any social media or emails late at night. A good night’s sleep and some time have a way of miraculously changing my attitude and perspective.

But the life of faith does have an emotional component to it. You just don’t put feelings in front. That’s where faith comes in. Feelings should be the caboose of your spiritual journey, present but not leading the way.

God is real even when I don’t feel Him. God’s promises are true even when I can’t see them. Obedience is acting in loving ways even when I don’t feel loving and following God’s commands when I don’t want to.

I’ve always loved the idea that my security as a believer doesn’t depend on how tightly I hold God’s hand but how He won’t ever let go of me.

Being in Love

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I decided to take the night off and let someone else do the heavy lifting. Here are some profound thoughts on being in love from one Mr. C. S. Lewis:

“What we call ‘being in love’ is a glorious state, and, in several ways, good for us. It helps to make us generous and courageous, it opens our eyes not only to the beauty of the beloved but to all beauty, and it subordinates (especially at first) our merely animal sexuality; in that sense, love is the great conqueror of lust.

No one in his senses would deny that being in love is far better than either common sensuality or cold self-centredness.

But, as I said before, ‘the most dangerous thing you can do is to take any one impulse of our own nature and set it up as the thing you ought to follow at all costs’. Being in love is a good thing, but it is not the best thing.

There are many things below it, but there are also things above it. You cannot make it the basis of a whole life. It is a noble feeling, but it is still a feeling. Now no feeling can be relied on to last in its full intensity, or even to last at all.

Knowledge can last, principles can last, habits can last; but feelings come and go. And in fact, whatever people say, the state called ‘being in love’ usually does not last” (C. S. Lewis, Mere Christianity).

While being in love may not last forever, choosing to love can. You may not always feel love but you can always choose to act in love. Love in the truest sense is a verb– it is an action, an act of the will, something intentional that you do.

Sorry if I ruined your romantic rom-com fantasies about the happily ever after. I truly believe that the real thing, though not as pretty and picturesque, is far far better.

“This is the embodiment of true love: not that we have loved God first, but that He loved us and sent His unique Son on a special mission to become an atoning sacrifice for our sins” (1 John 4:10, The Voice).

A Good Night

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So I inadvertently recycled my sunglasses tonight.

I was in the process of depositing several plastic bottles into one of the recycle containers in the Connection Center of Brentwood Baptist Church (also known as The Place Where They Have Kairos on Tuesdays).

I’m still not exactly sure of the order of events (or even 100% positive of the sunglasses part) but I believe that when I bent down to beautify the planet by not adding to the already overflowing landfills and being green and all that, my sunglasses slipped off my shirt and into the container (along with one unopened water bottle that I fully intended to drink).

Something a guy I work with came to mind: if that’s the worst thing that happens to me tonight, I’m having a good night.

Later, the main speaker, Chris Brooks, said something that arrested my attention. He said that while emotions can be very real, they aren’t always reliable. Immediately, my mind went to Jeremiah 17:9 where the heart, the seat of all emotions, is described as “most devious and incurably sick.”

I’ve learned that one the hard way over the years. Trial and error have taught me never to trust my emotions when I’m fatigued or hungry (and especially not when it’s a combination of the two).

While feelings can be legitimate, they can be misleading. I remember something a friend said once that I’ve never forgotten– feelings can lie to you, so you go with what you know.

In my case, I remember that Jesus promised that everything would turn out fine in the end (and if it’s not fine, it’s not yet the end). Jesus promised that He’d work all things together for good. Jesus promised never to leave or forsake me.

I cling to these promises when my feelings tell me they have failed. I hold fast to what Jesus said over what I feel because while my feelings come and go, Jesus’ words are eternal and secure.

I ended up making a late night run to Kroger’s and picking up another pair of shades just like the ones I accidentally discarded. Next time, I hope I’ll be a little less careless when saving the planet.

 

God Can Do Anything 

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“God can do anything, you know—far more than you could ever imagine or guess or request in your wildest dreams! He does it not by pushing us around but by working within us, his Spirit deeply and gently within us. Glory to God in the church! Glory to God in the Messiah, in Jesus! Glory down all the generations! Glory through all millennia! Oh, yes!” (Ephesians 3:20-21)

Repeat after me: God can do anything.

Repeat it again: God can do anything.

Once more with feeling: God can do anything.

Got that?

Nothing is impossible for God. Nothing. And your circumstances are not the exception to the rule. You are not the odd man out, the freak that God looks at and says, “I can’t do anything with this one.”

No matter what you’re facing, God is stronger. No matter how dark it gets, God can still see you. No matter how long it seems to take, God has not stopped working.

I remind you yet again of what a pastor said: “What seems impossible to us is not even remotely difficult for God.”

If God can create the universe in seven days, then He can create order out of your chaos.

If God brought Jesus back from the dead, then He can resurrect the ashes of your dreams into something far more glorious and beautiful than you ever dreamed possible.

If God loved you enough to save you at your worst, what makes you think He will stop loving you now?

Don’t trust your feelings. They lie. Anything and everything affects them, from eating too much spicy food to way too much caffeine late at night.

Make this your mantra: God works all things together for those whom He loves.

Even when your feelings, your senses, your intuition tells you other wise, this is still true. It will always be true.

 

Sign of the Times

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“You’re going to find that there will be times when people will have no stomach for solid teaching, but will fill up on spiritual junk food—catchy opinions that tickle their fancy. They’ll turn their backs on truth and chase mirages. But you—keep your eye on what you’re doing; accept the hard times along with the good; keep the Message alive; do a thorough job as God’s servant” (2 Timothy 4:3-5, The Message).

“because a time will come when some will no longer tolerate sound teaching. Instead, they will live by their own desires; they’ll scratch their itching ears by surrounding themselves with teachers who approve of their lifestyles and tell them what they want to hear. They will turn away from the real truth you have to offer because they prefer the sound of fables and myths. But you must stay focused and be alert at all times. Tolerate suffering. Accomplish the good work of an evangelist, and complete the ministry to which you have been called.” (2 Timothy 4:3-5, The Voice).

Here’s the thing. Lots of people are determining their theology by whether it feels right or not. If it feels good, it must be true; if it makes me uncomfortable, it must be not I but that doctrine or belief that needs to change.

I don’t claim to understand it all. I don’t claim to have all the answers. I do know this– Feelings are fickle and changeable. Feelings will (and often do) lie to you.

If I put my feelings over the Word of God, then I make myself the final judge of what is or is not true. But if I determine my feelings by what the Word of God says, then I’m submitting to God’s authority.

I really would like everything that’s true to feel good all the time. But I know that I (and the rest of us) are fallen human beings. Our emotions, our minds, our thought processes are affected by the Fall.

I trust God. I trust His Word. Even when it makes me uncomfortable.

 

 

What’s It Worth?

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“Calling the crowd to join his disciples, he said, ‘Anyone who intends to come with me has to let me lead. You’re not in the driver’s seat; I am. Don’t run from suffering; embrace it. Follow me and I’ll show you how. Self-help is no help at all. Self-sacrifice is the way, my way, to saving yourself, your true self. What good would it do to get everything you want and lose you, the real you? What could you ever trade your soul for?'” (Mark 8:34-37).

God is not your co-pilot. If He is, it’s time to switch seats.

But enough of cliches. This is the gospel. It’s not about prosperity and happiness. It’s about following Jesus, no matter what, even if it hurts.

Sometimes where Jesus leads is pleasant, but not always.

Sometimes, it feels good to follow Jesus, but sometimes it feels like swimming against the current.

Sometimes, you’ll really feel like saying yes to whatever Jesus asks of you, but sometimes you will have to say yes when your feelings are saying no.

It’s about letting Jesus lead, wherever He takes you and through whatever He brings you.

As much as I love my comfort and convenience, that’s not the road that Jesus took.

His road was marked with suffering and pain.

His road was definitely the road less traveled, the narrow road that few find that leads to life eternal.

His road was the road that led to you and me in our worst moments, where He invited us to follow and find out what a different and better life could look like.

What good would it do me to get everything I’ve ever wanted and dreamed about, everything on my Amazon wish list, everything on my bucket list, and lose my soul in the process?

If I have everything else and no Jesus, I have nothing. If I have nothing else but Jesus, I have everything.

The end.

 

The Theology of Tired

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Have you ever been somewhere and suddenly have the overwhelming feeling of being tired? Like you could go sleep for 18 hours straight?

I had that feeling tonight. I went from fine to tired in 0.6 seconds. At least, that’s what it felt like.

Sometimes when you’re tired, your mind can play tricks on you. It will tell you that you’re all alone, that no one really understands you– or really wants to. That maybe they’d be better off without you.

It’s easy to take small things that mean nothing– a particular turn of phrase or remark– and make it seem monumental.

You have to remind yourself that your brain doesn’t function at its best when you’re tired. Sometimes, the best thing– the most spiritual thing– you can do is physically rest. Take a nap. Go to bed early.

The longer you let those tired thoughts play out in your head, the more attractive they become. You can even be to the point of wanting to give up on everything and everybody for no good reason. All because you’re tired.

As I learned once and have mentioned before more than once, what you think and what you feel will lie to you, so you go with what you know.

You remember that God is faithful and He’s got His eye on you tonight. You’ll be alright in the end. And all those overblown scenarios that play out in your head won’t ever come to fruition.

God is in control. You’re not. That’s a very good thing.

More Nouwen on Being Loved

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“In my own life I well know how hard it is for me to trust that I am loved, and to trust that the intimacy I most crave is there for me. I most often live as if I have to earn love, do something noteworthy, and then perhaps I might get something in return.

This attitude touches the whole question of what is called in the spiritual life, the “first love.” Do I really believe that I am loved first, independent of what I do or what I accomplish? This is an important question because as long as I think that what I most need I have to earn, deserve and collect by hard work, I will never get what I most need and desire, which is a love that cannot be earned, but that is freely given.

Thus, my return is my willingness to renounce such thoughts and to choose to live more and more from my true identity as a cherished child of God” (Henri Nouwen).

I think that sums up my feelings rather perfectly.

Dis con ect ted

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There’s a movie I really like that you’ve probably never heard of. In this movie, a woman is shopping and trying on a new dress. Suddenly and inexplicably, reality shifts and no one can see or hear her anymore. As much as she frantically shouts and begs for people to notice her, no one does.

Do you ever feel like that? Do you feel like you have days when you feel disconnected from the rest of the world?

As someone who’s been there, done that, I have a few reminders.

1) Just because you feel it doesn’t make it true. Feelings don’t always tell the truth. They mean well, but they can be so very misleading, especially when you’re tired or hungry or if you have an upset stomach or a headache. Anything like that can affect your feelings.

2) Even if it were true that no one knew you were there (which is highly unlikely), God would know. There’s a verse in the Psalms that says that He knows when you make your bed in hell or when you’re dancing in the heavens. Or something like that. The point is that God always knows where you are and what you’re going through.

3) Those who matter will notice. Those who don’t, won’t. It really is that simple.

4) Use those days to find someone else who looks left out and reach out to them. Use your own feelings to identify with them and help them know they’re not alone either. Sit next to a lonely stranger and strike up a conversation. Offer a smile to the one whom no one else notices. It could be a world of difference for them.

Everyone has those disconnected days. Even you crazy extroverts. But take heart. These days only last 24 hours, just like all the other days. And in my own experience, there are very few things that a good night’s sleep and a fresh start won’t fix.

 

 

Forgiveness and Grace in January

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“Forgiveness is the name of love practiced among people who love poorly. The hard truth is that all people love poorly. We need to forgive and be forgiven every day, every hour increasingly. That is the great work of love among the fellowship of the weak that is the human family” Henri J.M. Nouwen).

Have you royally messed up with a friend (or at least felt like you have)? Have you ever had someone “let you have it,” verbally blasting you with a post or a text?

Maybe you deserved it. Maybe not.

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Or maybe you’re the one who did the telling off. Maybe you got way upset with someone and spoke in pure anger and frustration. Maybe that person deserved it.

I have some questions for you and me.

1) Since when is the life of a believer about giving people what they deserve? Isn’t it supposed to be about giving those in your life the benefit of the doubt and extending grace?

Which leads to my second question:

2) Would I want Jesus treating me as I deserve? Would I even stand a chance?

I know the answers to the second question are: no, not long, and a snowball’s chance in hell.

Maybe I need to drop that stone in my hand and look in the mirror. I may look just like that person I intend to cast that proverbial first stone at. I may not struggle with the same sins, but my sins would make me just as guilty in the eyes of a holy God if not for grace and Jesus.

It’s one thing to call out a person in love when their actions don’t match their professed beliefs. It’s another to blast someone and assume sinful motives, which I’ve done too many times. And in this case, once is one time too many.

You will lose friendships through misundestandings. You will have “friends” who show their true colors when you act in the slightest unloving way or slip in the least. You will have those who will stick with you even when you yourself would have bailed on you.

I’m glad God doesn’t ever give me what I have coming to me or treat me as my sins deserve. Even on my best days, I’d still be in trouble. Because of my favorite word– grace– God looks at my filthy rags of good intentions and best efforts and sees the perfection of Jesus.

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Gosh, I do so love grace!

PS You will need to forgive yourself at some point. All of the above still applies if it’s you needing the forgiveness from yourself.