fashion

Beauty and the Beholder

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Somehow, it seems to me that we’ve gotten it all wrong when it comes to romantic love. We look for the most attractive person we can find and hope that the attraction will lead to love.

But I think it’s just the opposite. Being loved makes you beautiful.

Think of the ultimate love that God has for us. His love calls out in us our best selves. His love calls out in us life and beauty and strength and wisdom.

If we are his children, then we can call those things out in each other, I think.

I heard a story of a guy who married a girl no one would ever have thought of as beautiful. But day after day, he called beauty out in her by telling her how lovely she was. In time, she came to be as lovely as he always said she was.

Ultimately, it’s not being lovable and lovely that brings us love. It’s in being loved that makes us lovable and lovely, as supremely evidenced in the transforming work of God’s love in us.

True beauty is beauty that lasts. It shows itself in kindness, gentleness, self-control, joy, peace, patience, and in so many other ways. It’s more than physical attractiveness which fades with the years. It’s about a beauty that’s within that shines out through a smile and a glowing countenance.

All this came from a movie. You may or may not have heard of it, but it’s called Enchanted Cottage and it’s about a man disfigured by war and a woman who is considered homely by just about everybody else, but love brings them together. Through looking with the eyes of their hearts, they come to see each other as handsome and beautiful.

That’s the way God has always seen you and me. May we as we grow in the love of God come to see each other that way.

An ordinary guy’s thoughts on pretty vs. beautiful

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grace kelly 2

I am pretty much going  way outside my areas of expertise on this one. I am not a fashion person. I have spent a long time watching and observing, and have come up with my own theories. Here’s one.

There’s a big difference to me between pretty and beautiful.

Pretty is common. I see a lot of pretty girls. Beauty is much rarer and harder to define, but you know it when you see it.

Pretty is what you put on, but beauty is what comes out of you. It’s not what you wear, but who you are. Pretty is cosmetics and beauty is character.

Pretty is something you see with your eyes, but beauty is something you find when you look with your heart. You have to have your eyes open to notice. To really be aware not just of how she looks, but how she acts and how she treats others.

Pretty fades. Gravity wins and time takes its toll. Beauty grows over time as the character inside blossoms and grows toward maturity and Christlikeness.

I decided again tonight that I want beauty, even if it means waiting longer and looking with a different set of eyes. To me, kindness and compassion in a woman are beautiful. Loving the unloveable and giving to those who can’t give back and socializing with those who are not like you is beautiful.

It means I have to be a man of character if I want a woman of character. That I continue to train my eyes to see women as princesses and not objects, as society tells us they are.

There you have it. I am no expert, but I know what I feel. I hope I’m not the only one who feels this way, but I am ok with it if I am.

What true beauty looks like (from a guy’s perspective)

/ Ragamuffingospelfan / 3 Comments

grace kelly

This may get me into trouble. I’m venturing out beyond my comfort zone into uncharted territory for me as a man. I am probably way out of my league on this, but here’s what I believe about true feminine beauty. So read it with a dash of salt and a touch of grace (or more like a whole heaping handful of grace).

True beauty is more about character than cosmetics. Instead of putting on the latest fashion, it’s about putting on “compassion, kindness, humility, quiet strength, discipline. Be even-tempered, content with second place, quick to forgive an offense. Forgive as quickly and completely as the Master forgave you. And regardless of what else you put on, wear love. It’s your basic, all-purpose garment. Never be without it” (Colossians 3:12).” Some questions I would ask any woman who wants to be known for her beauty are: 1) How do you treat those who are different than you? 2) Do you go out of your way to associate with those who are not in your social circles, and possibly beneath you in terms of societal rankings? 3) Have you given of yourself to someone you know will never be able to repay you?

In my opinion, true beauty means a woman need not always try to prove or justify herself. It means that she knows who she is, or better yet Whose she is. That she is a daughter of the King, a princess and knows how to act like one. It means that if I ever want to pursue and court her, I must treat her like the princess and child of God she is. True beauty means that if I took her and turned her over, I would see God’s signature as proof of her priceless worth (and yes, that one came from Mike Glenn, not me. Gotta give props where props are due!)

Charm is deceitful and beauty of the outer kind is vain and fleeting. But fearing the Lord is what makes a woman lovely. I have always thought that Grace Kelly was one of the most beautiful women ever, and I think it’s because you see gentleness and kindness in her eyes.

I’ve changed a lot in my views about what makes a woman beautiful. Now I think what makes her beautiful is her transparency, where Christ shines brightest through her. That’s what I want in a wife. That and a sense of humor, cause she’s pretty much gonna need it with me. And maybe Rachel Ray’s cooking skills. Ok, that last part was a joke. Maybe.

I’ve probably got a whole lot to learn about this topic, but I hope I’ve made a good start. Which is always being willing to admit how little you know about what you thought you had all figured out. That’s where I am.