Ohhhhhhhh, Fudge– Yet Another Monday Morning in Perspective

December 2, 2013December 2, 2013 / Ragamuffingospelfan / Leave a comment

This was one of those kind of Monday mornings that make you want to say, “Ohhhh, fudge.” At least it did for me. And yes, I mean the kind of fudge like in the movie A Christmas Story.

I was happily rolling along. . . well, at 5:30 am, it was more like sleepily rolling along to work. Then I looked up. It was either an 18-wheeler or large bus coming toward me, hugging the yellow lines. So I did what any red-blooded male would do.

I panicked.

I went to give the behemoth vehicle a wide berth and went too wide. My tires hit the edge of the pavement. It sounded like the whole side of my car was being shredded.

I managed to get to the side of the road. I was expecting to see gory car wreck carnage. Thankfully, all I saw was one fatally punctured tire.

I called AAA because I am mechanically challenged even when it comes to changing a tire. In my defense, those lug-nuts were on that wheel tight.

What was supposed to take 45 minutes or less took almost 1 1/2 hours. So I was late to work.

But after that, it got better. And I have to keep a few things in mind:

I’m sooo glad I had my AAA road service paid up.

I’m thankful I have a car to almost (but thankfully not) wreck.

I’m blessed to have a job to go to even if it occasionally starts at 6 am.

I’m grateful for a very understanding boss.

Most of all, I’m thankful every day that I don’t get what I deserve. I get grace instead.

PS don’t suppose cussing in your head merits having to wash your mouth out with soap, right?

Pre-WordPress Writings Part 4

December 1, 2013 / Ragamuffingospelfan / Leave a comment

God forgive me for being nice

God, forgive me for being nice and polite and when I should have been taking risks and living. Forgive me for trying to be what everyone else wanted me to be and not being me. Forgive me that I am just beginning to learn who that person is. Forgive me for thinking I had to beg people to like me and earn their approval. Forgive me for trying to define myself by what some girl or some group or some status, but not believing that You defined me and said that I was good. No. More than good. I am your masterpiece. Forgive me that I am going to check to see if anyone read this note and if they liked it. If no one reads it but me and you, it was worth it. If anyone had any doubts before, this will set the record straight. I am a broken man who has found grace in Jesus and wants the world to know that He can take broken lives and make them whole again. I am no longer a nice guy. I am a godly man. I am a warrior. My Abba is very fond of me!

This note is for people who will never read it (got your attention now?)

My greatest fear is that if people ever really find out who I am and what I am like, they will leave me and want nothing else to do with me. That I am not good enough. That I do not have what it takes.

So I live to please others. I become whoever I think they want me to be. I strive constantly to prove myself to others, so they can tell me who I am. That I do have what it takes. I feel that if I can make them like me, then I am worthy and not a cosmic *$#-up.

But I can’t make anyone like me or be interested in me. I can only let God love me and let that Love define me. If I let people tell me who I am and define me, they will get it wrong. If I make pleasing people my purpose, they will fail me every single time.

Lord, you are telling me that I am someone beautiful who has meaning and is worthy. I am good enough and I do have what it takes because I have you. I believe what You say about me. Lord, I do believe. Help my unbelief.

A Frosty December Night in Franklin

November 29, 2013November 29, 2013 / Ragamuffingospelfan / Leave a comment

I was having Downtown Franklin withdrawals, so I decided to remedy that in the only way I know how– make a trek to all my favorite places and see all my favorite people.

I started off by visiting McCreary’s Irish Pub, where I ran into three of my favorite people– Art, Ashley, and Cassie. Plus, the food there ain’t too shabby. If you ever want to go there, ask me what to get– I’ve been there enough times and tried just about everything on the menu. Better yet, you could invite me and I could introduce you to all the awesome people who work there.

My next stop was . . . you guessed it . . . Frothy Monkey. I know, I know. I’ve gotten into a rut when it comes to Franklin. But it is such a tasty rut. A tasty and comfortable rut.

I had a hot chocolate that was as closed to heavenly as you can get on this side of heaven. And that’s no lie. And not much of an exaggeration.

I got treated to another organ concert at St. Paul’s Episcopal Church. Well, it was the organ dude practicing what I assumed would be the music for next Sunday. I sat down, took off my coat, took some deep cleansing breaths, and listened. I think God speaks through music as much as through anything else and He was speaking to me tonight.

I’ll hopefully be back to my regular Thursday visits and definitely want to experience the Christmas Parade on December 7 and A Dickens of a Christmas on either December 14 or 15 (or possibly both).

I have to be at work at 6 am, so I suppose I should wrap this up. But not before I leave you with this cutesy picture of my cat curled up in a Christmas wreath.

Fire Bad, Tree Pretty, Me Sleepy

November 26, 2013November 30, 2013 / Ragamuffingospelfan / Leave a comment

After working 23 hours in two days and having two nights of sleep where I feel like I woke up every 30 minutes, I am bone tired. Like to the point where I’m not exactly functioning on a higher brain level. Mostly my brain tells me to go to bed.

I’m hoping for a better night of sleep than the last two nights. I had weird dreams and like I said earlier, I woke up like clockwork, not because I wanted to or because I was so worried about anything. I just did. Rude.

But I wanted to tell you before I do call it a night that I’m thankful for you reading this and all my other blogs. It really does mean a lot to me that you take time out of your crazy schedules and choose my posts out of all the posts in the world to read.

So thank you.

Fire bad, tree pretty, me go sleep now.

Giving Thanks In Every Circumstance

November 24, 2013November 24, 2013 / Ragamuffingospelfan / Leave a comment

I know you’re not supposed to give thanks FOR everything. That would be just plain weird. I mean who gives thanks for losing a loved one or getting fired from a job or for finding out you have a terminal illness?

But you can give thanks in the midst of those things, if for nothing more than God’s promise to work all things, even those things, together for good for those who love Him.

I’ve learned a few places where you can give thanks that don’t really seem to be places where gratitude is naturally found:

I can give thanks when my job involves long hours and tedious moments because I remember what it was like to not have a job and to not have money and to not feel productive or useful.

I can give thanks when a friend gives up on me or withdraws from me because it makes me not take for granted those who have stuck with me through dark days and low moments.

I can give thanks for delayed pay checks and not having a lot in the ol’ checking account because my eyes are opened once more to true riches of relationships and health and life and contentment and I find that I am wealthy in what really matters.

I can give thanks when the people I care about move away or simply disappear because I learn to treasure the time I am given with the people I am given and to be a blessing to the people in my life while it’s still called today because tomorrow is never guaranteed.

I can give thanks that bad days make the good days better, that rainy days make me appreciate sunshine more, that bitterly cold weather makes me love wool coats and fleece scarfs all the more, and that the meds keep me reminded that am not perfect or normal or self-sufficient but that I am always loved in spite of all these things. No, because of these things.

Gratitude is a habit that is learned one day at a time and joy is an lifestyle of slowing down and opening your eyes to see the small daily miracles all around you called blessings.

Don’t forget to be thankful for those small furry babies who love you unconditionally (even when you step on their tails for forget to feed them periodically or accidentally shut them in garages or closets). I just thought I’d throw that one in for free.

PS I am thankful every day that Jesus never gave up on me until He found me, rescued me, and brought me into His family. I am thankful that my weaknesses prove His strength, my sin shows the power of His grace and forgiveness, and my failures showcase His ability to make masterpieces out of messes.

Those Times

November 23, 2013 / Ragamuffingospelfan / Leave a comment

I’ve been living my miracle. I’ve been counting my blessings and finding joy in the everyday minutiae of life. But sometimes . . . .

You know the feeling. It happens when you’re tired or hungry or by yourself– or all three.

You feel like your friends will all eventually abandon you. Little things, like someone not responding to a text or someone else who usually liked and commented on your posts not having done so for a few days, seem like proof that you’re not really wanted or desired.

You find it’s much easier to wallow in that old mire of self-pity and entitlement than to fight for the joy and to consciously bring to mind the blessings. Sometimes it does feel good (but not in a good way) to feel sorry for yourself and believe that no one truly understands or cares about you. Lies are sometimes easier to believe and more comforting than the truth. Well, most of the time.

It’s at those times when you want to lean on what you’re feeling as a gauge for how you’re doing. It’s times when you want to use your understanding as a crutch for figuring out your life at that particular moment.

But just remember this familiar verse:

“Lean on, trust in, and be confident in the Lord with all your heart and mind and do not rely on your own insight or understanding [or feelings]. In all your ways know, recognize, and acknowledge Him, and He will direct and make straight and plain your paths” (Proverbs 3:5-6. Amplified)

I added that part about feelings, in case you wondered. But it’s implied in the Hebrew.

Trust God, not in how you feel or what you think. Those things (thoughts and feelings) aren’t always trustworthy. But God is.

And I know from experience your friends aren’t nearly as ready to abandon you as you think they are. Sometimes, they just get caught up in life, their own pain, crazy work or school, etc. They haven’t forgotten or left you.

Remember even if one or two has left you, God never will. He’s promised with an oath as sure as Himself to be with you, no matter what, not only up to the end, but beyond.

That should help you get past those times.

The Golden Ticket

November 22, 2013November 22, 2013 / Ragamuffingospelfan / Leave a comment

I love the movie Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory. It’s dated and I’m pretty sure everybody in it has a combover of some kind. Even the little boy Charlie. The Oompa Loopas look like victims of bad tanning bed experiences and the songs are more than a bit annoying and preachy. And what’s up with their pants?

But there’s just something lovable underneath all the weirdness of Willy Wonka. Plus, who doesn’t love the concept of winning one of five golden tickets to get a lifetime supply of chocolate?

I can’t help thinking that grace is a lot like a golden ticket. I don’t mean you can buy it or earn it even by eating lots and lots of chocolate bars. And it is not limited to five people.

But think about it. In the end, Charlie gets a lot more than just chocolate. He gets everything that belongs to Willy Wonka. The factory, the candy, all the candy-making secrets, and even those creepy Oompa Loompas.

If I belong to Jesus by grace through faith, then I get salvation. But I get so much more.

I get life to the fullest that lasts forever. I get joy. I get peace. I do have troubles and suffering but I get Jesus to go through all of it with me. I get everything I need to be everything Jesus created me to be. I get not just God’s gifts but God Himself.

Above all, I get to be a part of the amazing work God is doing in rescuing His created universe and His children. I get to share God’s heart for everything He made and, best of all, I get to know God and to love Him and be loved by Him. I get to be one of the coduits through which His power, grace, love, and healing flow to hurting and needy people.

By the way, I can’t help thinking Mike Teevee grew up and became Jay Leno. They both get on my nerves (said in Christian love and mostly in jest).

That’s How You Know

November 21, 2013 / Ragamuffingospelfan / Leave a comment

“When you wake up one morning surprised to see the world exists
And your eyes ain’t full of tears
Your heart ain’t full of bitterness

That’s how you know, that’s how you know
That’s how you know, that’s how you know

When you’re thankful that you ever knew a love this strong
When you finally find the courage to write this song

That’s how you know
That’s how you know
That’s how you know
You’re moving on………” (Lori McKenna)

Growth is hard to detect on a daily basis. That wound may not look like it’s healing on an hour-to-hour basis. But here is some of the evidence that I’ve started growing and healing:

1) When a friend seems to so silent on me, i.e. doesn’t comment on my posts nearly as much or quits responding to texts, I don’t freak out and assume the worst. I don’t automatically go to defcon-4 and wonder how I’ve horribly offended the person. I breathe deeply a few times and let it go and choose to believe the best.

2) Rejection doesn’t bother me nearly as much as it did even last year. I’ve learned to let it go and move on and appreciate the people who do want me around. It’s less tiring that way.

3) I don’t get caught up in rehearsing what I will say to this person or that person if I see them. I don’t obsess over what somebody meant by a throwaway phrase or something that hit me wrong. I try to focus on the present and all the blessings there.

4) I don’t feel the need to be appreciated or noticed all the time. I can simply enjoy the moment quietly. Also, I’ve decided that since I’ve stopped trying so hard to be witty and humorous, I’m a lot funnier. At least in my own head.

I heard something I like a lot: time doesn’t heal all wounds; only Jesus does that. Remember that the next time, but also remember He’s still the best Physician when it comes to broken hearts and lives.

A Multiple Choice Quiz About My Life

November 19, 2013November 19, 2013 / Ragamuffingospelfan / Leave a comment

Surprise! Professor Greg is giving you a pop quiz about his fascinating life. Hint: all the answers to all the following questions will be d) all of the above. Keep your eyes on your own paper, no talking, and no gum chewing. Here goes:

1) I was recently interested in a fellow Kairos greeter until I found out a) she’s interested in someone else, b) she’s WAY too young for me, c) I’m perfectly content to be her friend for as long as God allows, and d) all of the above.

2) Tonight at Kairos, I learned that a) love is an action, b) Jesus calls me His friend, c) He calls me to love and forgive those who aren’t easy to love or forgive, d) all of the above.

3) My eventual demise will come from a) tripping over my cat, b) choking on a spoonful of Wendy’s Frosty, c) in a very non-heroic and non-graceful manner, d) all of the above.

4) True or False: Greg is one of the most awesome people alive. Hint: the answer is True.

5) Today, I’m glad that a) I woke up, b) I didn’t fall down, c) I am still forgiven and loved and held by my Abba Father, d) all of the above.

6) Jesus’ love for me is a) unconditional and unending, b) amazing, c) not meant for me to hoard but for me to share, d) all of the above.

7) Kairos is a) a worship event at Brentwood Baptist Church, b) at 7 pm every Tuesday night, c) something you need to attend weekly, d) all of the above.

8) Multiple choice tests are a) a pain, b) given by teachers too lazy to create real tests, c) a crapshoot, d) all of the above.

9) I always get ice cream at Chick-fil-A after Kairos because a) it’s ice cream, b) it’s free, c) it’s free ice cream (thanks to the Foursquare app on my iPhone), d) all of the above.

10) You are a) fearfully and wonderfully made, b) amazing and unique and beautiful and special, c) someone I am thankful for (and not just because you’re reading this blog and taking this quiz), d) all of the above and then some.

A Conversation with David

November 18, 2013November 18, 2013 / Ragamuffingospelfan / Leave a comment

I was sitting outside of Starbucks minding my own business and being all unobtrusive when a guy walked up and started a conversation with me. Well, he did most of the talking.

He noticed my very green Bible and wondered what I was reading in it. He asked if I was in seminary. He proceeded to give his thoughts on God, a brief synopsis of his faith history, a sad tale of his previous two vehicles, and the weather report. Ok, I’m just kidding. About that last one.

If ever God presented me with a golden opportunity to share my faith, this was it.

I can’t say I passed with flying colors. I left out some stuff I should have said. A great deal. But I did invite him to Kairos. I did my best to listen. Truly listen. Not wait to respond or listen to correct his theology, but listening to try to feel what he was feeling.

After he left, I prayed for him. I’m still praying. I’m praying that he took away something from our conversation more than my words. I’m praying he caught something in my expression or my countenance that even I didn’t know was there. Maybe he saw Jesus in me and maybe he will be drawn to that.

I’m praying for more conversations, more opportunities where I can be bolder and more eloquent about what I believe. Maybe I can share my own faith story. All I know is that unless the Spirit is in it, nothing I say or do will matter– even if I start spouting off verses in Hebrew and Greek.

Most of all, I’m praying for my eyes to be open to more people like him and I will see these people not through my own narrow set of eyes, but through God’s widescreen vision.

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