faith

Thoughts on Light and Dark

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“What we are telling you now is the very message we heard from Him: God is purelight, undimmed by darkness of any kind. If we say we have an intimate connection with the Father but we continue stumbling around in darkness, then we are lying because we do not live according to truth. If we walk step by step in the light, where the Father is, then we are ultimately connected to each other through the sacrifice of Jesus His Son. His blood purifies us from all our sins” (1 John 1:5-7, The Voice).

It struck me tonight how staggering the word picture of light and dark really is. I mean, you really can’t get more polar opposites than light and dark. It is literally a night and day difference.

John speaks of believers who formerly walked in darkness  who now walk in light.

That’s not about being a little nicer and a little more patient. That’s not about being a better and more improved version of yourself.

That’s about as radical a change as you can have. That’s about the difference between being dead and being alive.

It makes me wonder why there is such little difference between the lives of some believers and the lives of the unbelievers around them. If I’m truly walking in God’s light, how can I continue to act out of dark motives and desires?

I’m not suggesting that those who follow Jesus are supposed to be perfect. I am saying that they should look and sound different.

My favorite pastor once said that the problem that an unbelieving world has with Christians is not that they are too different from everybody else; it’s that they are too much the same. They speak a good game, but they don’t live the way they speak.

I can say that because I live that way too often. Too many of us are too good at being incognito Christians.

May God continue to lead us into a place where we strive to walk in the light and reflect the radical difference that comes from what only God can do.

 

Dear Abba

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“Dear Abba,

Ten thousand things are already vying for my attention. Wait, actually make that ten thousand and one. Some of them are shallow — like what shoes I will wear today — but some of them are legitimate: lunch with a friend, a doctor’s appointment, responding to a letter. Still, they are all earthly things. So startle me, I pray. Burst into the compound of my senses and steal me away from the urgent tyrannies already seeking to keep my eyes fixed on things below. You died for me. For me. That is the one thing; nothing else compares” (Brennan Manning).

That’s my prayer, too. That I would be startled away from the tyranny of the urgent in my own life, to have my eyes fixed on the reason for both Lent and Easter.

I think that says it all on this Saturday before we celebrate Palm Sunday.

 

 

Someone In Your Corner

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For Jesus is not some high priest who has no sympathy for our weaknesses and flaws. He has already been tested in every way that we are tested; but He emerged victorious, without failing God” (Hebrews 4:15, The Voice).

I saw something I thought was beautiful yesterday at the Youth Evangelism Conference last night.

After the invitation, I saw a young girl talking with an older woman, probably a youth leader or a youth parent. The young girl was obviously upset about something and crying and the woman was giving her best sympathetic ear.

That may not sound like much to you, but it spoke to my heart.

I’ve been in places before where the one thing I needed was to know that someone was in my corner, that someone believed in me enough to listen to what I had to say, crazy as it may have been.

Sometimes, you may not even want solutions. You just want someone  who will listen without judgment and who can say, “I know exactly what you feel because I’ve been there.”

The good news possible is that I have a high priest who understands. You have a high priest who understands. Jesus has experienced everything you and I go through, yet without failing like you and I sometimes do.

The best news is that Jesus isn’t someone who feels bad for us, which leaves two people feeling bad. He’s actually able to do something about it (credit to Mike Glenn for that one).

He’s actually able to take those stupid mistakes and bad decisions and to turn the outcome into something glorious. He’s more than able to redeem a life previously wasted and without meaning and make it count. Make it shine.

We have a High Priest who specializes in second chances and do-overs. That’s what I’m thankful for again tonight.

PS My time volunteering at the YEC was a blast (as usual) and God willing, I plan to be back next year for what I think will be my sixth year. Or maybe seventh. I’m really not good with the math.

 

Every Little Thing Matters

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“Lord, when I feel that what I’m doing is insignificant and unimportant, help me to remember that everything I do is significant and important in your eyes, because you love me and you put me here, and no one else can do what I am doing in exactly the way I do it” (Brennan Manning, Souvenirs of Solitude: Finding Rest in Abba’s Embrace).

That’s it.

As Mother Teresa once said, there are no great acts, but rather only small acts done with great love.

To put it another way, when done out of the right spirit, out of a genuine and abiding love for Jesus, everything you do and say can become an act of worship. Even cleaning toilets or scrubbing floors. All those menial tasks that don’t have much inherent value can be living prayers if they’re done as an offering to Jesus.

That makes all the difference in drudgery and delight, between surviving and thriving.

Maybe you’re not exactly in the high-profile career you thought you’d be in by now. Maybe you’re not pulling down the big bucks.

Then again maybe your job is to make a difference in the lives of those people in your office. Maybe your best gift is to be quite possibly the only positive light to someone who otherwise only exists in darkness.

Maybe you don’t have to go to seminary and get ordained to have a ministry. Maybe your ministry is you showing up every single day and giving your absolute very best for eight hours.

Maybe if you’re faithful in the little things over time, God will entrust you with bigger things down the road.

Or maybe you’ll get to the end of your life and realize that all those little things done with great love really were the big things after all.

 

Jesus Loves the Little Children

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The Gospel of Mark tells a very interesting story of Jesus and children.

By the way, when John-Mark brings up children, what he has in mind isn’t our highly idealized view of children as cherubic and precious, but the ancient culture’s view of children as those who couldn’t yet contribute, so therefore weren’t worth very much.

In other words, when Jesus welcomed those children, He welcomed the disenfranchised and marginalized. He welcomed those who were outcasts and nobodies to most people’s eyes.

Jesus often sought out those overlooked by everyone else. He sought out those on the fringes of society, those who often got overlooked and ignored.

That’s good news for those who have never felt like we belonged anywhere, to those who always feel on the outside looking in.

Jesus is for you. No matter what you’ve done or where you’ve been or who you’ve been with, Jesus is still for you. He wants to be with you, to be your peace and your strength.

That leads to the next question: who are you speaking for in your life who has no voice? Who are you standing up for who can’t stand up for themselves? Who are you using your gifts and talents to be Jesus to marginalized and ostracized people the way Jesus was to you?

These are some questions that Chris Brooks brought up at Kairos. The main question of the night was this: is your faith childlike or childish? That’s a question that will probably hit close to home for a lot of us (including me).

The childlike faith is one that still has doubts but know where to take them. It doesn’t necessarily claim to have all the answers but knows Who does. It may not always get what it wants but is never deterred in its trust in the God who ultimately always comes through with all His promises to us.

That’s the kind of faith I want.

Judges: A Book Review

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So here I am, reading through the Bible again. I just finished the book of Judges. In my opinion, that has to be the most depressing book in the Bible.

In the first few verses of the book, it tells us that after the generation that claimed the Promised Land died out, the very next generation that came after didn’t know the Lord or what He had done for His people.

That didn’t take long.

There is a familiar pattern in judges, repeated ad nauseum. The people run after the next available god, fall into sin, get into trouble, and call on God. God sends a deliverer who bails them out and there is peace in the land — until another cheap idol shows up.

I read the Bible and I see the people of God by and large acting like anything but the people of God. It can be very frustrating.

Then I remember that I am one of those people of God. I find myself falling into familiar patterns of sin over and over, despite the guilt that remains from the last time. I find myself renewing the old promise of “never again,” which lasts until the next opportunity presents itself.

So I can relate.

I’m not excusing my (or anyone else’s sin). I’m just saying that doesn’t have to be the end of the story. It doesn’t have to be the familiar refrain.

I’m thankful for a grace that goes deeper and longer than any sin. I’m also thankful for a God who refuses to let me wallow in my self-destructive sin, but will provide me a way out. He won’t rest or quit with me until I am 100% sin-free.

I know that my story is your story. It’s the story of every child of God. But I also know that story doesn’t end with sin. It ends with grace.

 

 

Kairos 2.0

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I think I’ll like the new Kairos. I liked the old one with Mike Glenn and I’m 99.9% certain that I’ll like the new version with Chris Brooks.

There’s still some fantastic worship music from a band that lots of people would pay good money to see if they decided to go on tour. There’s some spot-on expository teaching that always hits home and is both comforting and convicting.

Tonight was no exception.

The text was Mark 7 where Jesus healed the man born deaf and dumb. Chris made the point that a lot of us trouble speaking the Gospel because we’ve gotten to where we can’t really hear Jesus speaking to us.

We have a spiritual speech impediment because we’re deaf to what God has to say to us. What people hear from us about Jesus says more about us and where we are than it does about who Jesus actually is.

My prayer for both you and me is that Jesus can again open our ears to hear Him speaking. I suspect that if we ever get to the place where we truly hear God speaking to us, our message might be very different than the morality sin management message that gets passed around a lot these days.

What turns people off isn’t necessarily the message, but the disconnect they see between what we speak and how we live. When our eyes and ears finally are open to what Jesus wants to say to us, then our lifestyle will line up with our lips and we will not only talk the Gospel but walk it as well.

 

Gravy

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Waking up, breathing in, and breathing out. That’s the gift. Everything else is gravy.

I had quite the interesting evening.

It started off as a normal Thursday. I stopped by Best Buy and browsed a bit. I stopped by Barnes & Noble and browsed a bit more.

I ended up at Maniacs for dinner, which seemed easier and more convenient than trying to turn left onto Mallory at 6 pm.

The trouble started when I got in my car to drive home. I put my key in the ignition and turned. Nothing.

I tried it again. Nothing.

I waited a bit and tried once more. Nothing.

One of the guys who worked there tried to jump-start my car. Nothing.

I ended up calling AAA. The guy who showed up tried the same thing. Nothing.

Then he did something I’ve never seen before. He took a long wooden pole and jabbed it at something in my engine while the jumper cables did their thing.

I almost felt like burning incense and chanting to help out. It felt that mystical.

Whatever he did, worked. I was able to start my car and drive to Advance Auto Parts, where further testing revealed that my battery, starter, and alternator were all fine and dandy, thank you very much.

I still don’t know what happened. Maybe I’ll never know.

I do know that sometimes God is trying to get me to trust in the dark. It’s not enough to trust Him when all my prayers are answered and when all my dreams come true.

Perhaps the best place is trusting no matter what. Even if my car doesn’t start, even if my life doesn’t make complete sense, even if I never see another tangible sign of God, I still have more than enough reason to praise Him. I still have more than enough reason to trust Him.

Can you trust God if the job offers don’t come? Can you trust God if the spouse you’re praying for doesn’t get well? Can you trust God if the money doesn’t come through to pay those bills? Can you trust God even if you can’t see any hope that God will ever bring that significant other into your life?

Ultimately, God is enough. When you finally get that, you can trust Him no matter what. I think I got one step closer to that tonight.

 

I Hate Goodbyes

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I hate goodbyes.

Even though part of me knows that the ending of one thing often brings the beginning of something new and better, I still want to hold on to the old.

Even though part of me realizes that nothing on this side of eternity can last, I still want little pockets of my life to stay the same, for certain people in my life to always stay the same age and never get older. That’s probably the same part of me that still thinks fat ol’ Santa climbs down the chimney to bring me my presents.

Goodbyes are never easy. Tonight was no exception.

We said goodbye to Mike Glenn as Kairos pastor. I understand that it was time for a change. I understand that Kairos needed fresh blood and a new vision. I understand that you can’t keep doing things the same old way year after year and hope for different outcomes.

That doesn’t mean I don’t think it sucks.

People who have been out there in the dating world know how hard it is to say goodbye to relationships. Sometimes even to the dream of a relationship. It’s gut-wrenchingly hard to say goodbye to loved ones who pass away, like aunts and uncles and parents. I can’t begin to imagine what it’s like to say goodbye to your child.

The part that I keep holding on to when unexpected (and sometimes unwanted) change comes is that there is no goodbye in God’s love for me. There is no end to that enless love that won’t let me go. It even holds on to me when I’m doing everything in my power to let go of it.

I can’t envision a scenario in any future where goodbye will ever be an easy word to say. I don’t want to ever get used to saying goodbye.

I know when it comes to my Abba Father and His unconditional extravagent love for me, I never will.

 

 

More Musings About Music

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So, I hear there was some kind of awards ceremony tonight for the music industry. Something called the Grannies? The Grammys? Something like that.

Anyway, I skipped it like I’ve skipped the last few. To my ears, the music that gets played on the radio sounds like a lot of ear candy– sorta like cotton candy set to a beat. If you like current top-40 music, more power to you. It just isn’t for me.

I like my music more off the beaten path. One of my favorite singer-songwriters is Lori McKenna, whose album Lorraine is (in my opinion) a clinic in what good songwriting sounds like. I highly recommend it. Now if I can only find it in my considerable collection of music.

I also like to go back and revisit music that I listened to in the past. I find that I hear it with a different set of ears and that I appreciate it in a new way.

I still think that nothing is more powerful than a song that tells my story and that speaks my thoughts. It’s sometimes almost like having my diary set to music. Sometimes it’s a little scary how close they get.

That’s why I think if I had to choose between movies, books, and music, I’d probably go with music. Music is the only media that affects every area of the brain. Or so I’ve read on the internet, so it must be true.

PS I found that Lori McKenna album. It will probably find its way into the rotation on my homeward commute at some point in the very near future.

More to come later on what I’m discovering and listening to in the wonderful world of music.