exhaustion

Follow Where He Places Us

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“God engineers our circumstances as He did those of His Son; all we have to do is to follow where He places us. The majority of us are busy trying to place ourselves” (Oswald Chambers, The Love of God).

I love the scene in The Chosen Season 4 where Gaius is having a conversation with Matthew. In response to Gaius asking Matthew about all the different things he needs to be concerned about, Matthew basically says that he has only one thing to do today — follow Jesus. The rest will take care of itself.

That sounds a lot like Matthew 6:33. If we seek God’s Kingdom first, the rest will take care of itself. I think the western mind thinks of a Kingdom as a territory or a castle or something physical, but to the Jewish mind, they would see it not as a place but as the action of ruling. By God’s Kingdom, we are seeking the active reign of God in our lives and in the world around us.

In my own life, I sometimes try to place myself where I think it will do me the most good. God is saying to focus on seeking Him, and He will place me where He wants me to go. 10 times out of 10, that place is way better than the place I would have picked. Actually, make that 100 out of 100. You get the point. There is never a scenario where I choose better than God. None.

There’s a lot less stress in following Jesus rather than trying to figure it all out. Anxiety comes from trying to put out a million mental fires with everything going on in your life. You can run yourself ragged almost literally trying to work out every possible outcome to every situation you’re in. It’s exhausting.

But following God means resting in what God has promised to His people. Not resting as in taking a nap (and I do like me some naps), but rest as a sort of calm that know that even in the midst of the ranging storm we have a Lord who walks on water.

My goal today is to follow Jesus. Period. My goal is to seek first God’s Kingdom. Period. The rest will take care of itself. The end.

Random Thoughts on a December Friday

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December2

I think I mentioned a few posts back that I was tired. I still am. That’s what working 10+ hour days will do to a person. Especially when you’re talking six days a week of those long hours.

The good news is I have a job and I have money. I’m no Donald Trump about to go buy another island, but I can pay my bills and not have to worry about the next meal. That’s what I call blessed.

I haven’t forgotten that half the world’s population lives on $2 a day or less. Most of them will go to bed hungry, malnourished, and sick from water-b0rn illnesses caused by drinking unsafe water. Half the world’s population has never made or received a phone call, something I take for granted on a daily basis. Who am I to complain about working a few extra hours here and there?

When I get tired, I get cranky. Sometimes, I get sarcastic, although I very rarely let those kinds of comments out into the open air. I’d probably have way less friends and even less of a chance of dating than I do now.

I also get way self-absorbed and a little paranoid. I don’t think so much that people are out to get me, but rather they’re out to abandon me at the first opportunity. Fears that seem irrational during the day can seem very real at night. In the same way, thoughts that I would never entertain for a second when I’m well-rested seem to take root when I am exhausted to think clearly.

It’s a good thing God loves me in all my moods and in all my phases of life and through all my ups and downs. His grace covers it all. That same God that meets me where I am and loves me where I am won’t let me stay there. I’m thankful I’m a lot less self-centered and fearful than I used to be.

I get to sleep in tomorrow. It may not seem like such a big deal to you and normally it wouldn’t to me, but when you’ve had to be at work at 6 am for the past three Saturdays, being able to sleep past 8 am is a welcome change.

I love that when I wake up in the morning, God’s mercies will be new and His faithfulness will be just as fresh as that dew on those flowers in the spring. God is good like that.

Great North Star, But I’m Tired

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I’m tired. When I left my temp job for the day, I was actually sore. I can’t remember the last time I was ever sore from a job, but I was today. Plus, I haven’t slept very well the last two nights.

I don’t think that will be a problem tonight.

I am reminded of the verse in Matthew where Jesus says, “Come to me, all you who labor and are weary, and I will give you rest.” It could also be rendered, “Come to me, all who work to the point of exhaustion, and I will give you rest.”

I think it can mean sleep. But more than that, it means that we cease striving so much. It means that we give up the ever-present need to always perform and to do and to acquire. It means that we are content with who we are and where we are in life.

It means that we know that ultimately it’s not up to us. God’s in control and he will take care of us. As simple as that sounds, we are a forgetful people who need reminding of the very simple and basic truths that we aren’t in control.

We need to remind ourselves that it’s alright to leave some things undone every now and then. It’s not the end of the world if every box isn’t checked on that to-do list. It’s no good accomplishing all your goals if the end result is burn-out and exhaustion. We need rest.

We need to cultivate times of quiet reflection where we can hear the still, small voice that refuses to speak over the continuous drone of our everyday lives. The voice that reminds us that we are not the sum of our possessions or our activity, but we are who God made us to be and who he calls us– beloved.

So take time tonight or some time in the morning to be still and know that God’s plans for you are good. Remember to find times of refreshment and rest and solitude.

That’s what I’m about to do.