christianity

It’s A Good Feeling When . . .

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Elizabethtown-Panerai

It’s a good feeling when you can finally be you– the real you– with no shame or embarrassment. That you can be a full-on goober and not care what anybody else thinks. That you can be the ultimate anti-hipster and go against all that is hip and trendy and not give a rat’s . . . tail.

It’s a good feeling when people walk out of your life and you can smile and wave goodbye and move forward. When you know the people who mind don’t matter and the people who matter don’t mind. The people in your life are God’s blessing to you. When He removes people from your life, it’s often a bigger– though underappreciated– blessing. You never really know what He protected and saved you from when He did that.

It’s a good feeling when you’re content with who you are and realize the best things in life can’t be bought or sold or even valued. When you hear your Abba’s voice and decide that that one voice speaks more meaningfully to you than all the other voices of popularity and fame and success.

It’s a good feeling when you can finally forgive yourself for not being all things to all people, for not being perfect all the time, for being a forgiven sinner and not a first-rate saint. It really is a good feeling when you can not only hear God calling you His beloved in whom He is well pleased, but receive it and live out of it and never ever get over it.

So go live boldly. Make big mistakes and fail ridiculously. As one of my favorite quotes from a movies goes, “Have the courage to fail big and stick around and make ’em wonder why you’re still smilin’.”

And most of all, go out and love being you because not even you can love being you as much as God does.

 

Random Musings on a Sunday in May

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may

I haven’t done one of these random blogs in a while, so I thought it was time. Also, I’m not exactly overflowing with brilliant ideas today.

First of all, I was reminded again how fallible we as humans are and how easily our relationships can be damaged or destroyed. So I have this to pass along to you– in case you’re tempted to write someone off, remember that one day you could be in their place. The way you treat them is the way someone else will treat you.

I’ve preached extending grace to others but haven’t always practiced what I’ve preached. I’ve learned that I can’t be friends with everybody and that not every friend is a friend for life. I do much better when I leave my relationships in God’s hands instead of trying to control and manipulate them myself (which incidentally never goes well. FYI).

Also, I’m glad it’s May. As much as I like winter and cold weather, I’m ready for a break from it. The forecast for the next few days looks lovely with temps in the 80’s and no rain in sight. For now.

I’d like to get back to Radnor Lake and Arrington Vineyards and anyplace else that’s outdoorsy. I am currently reviewing and accepting any offers for any of the previously mentioned venues.

I’m finally reminded yet again that the best place to be is in the center of God’s will. To have Jesus and nothing else is still better than to have everything except for Jesus. Kinda like having the whole world and losing your own soul. There’s something in the Bible about that.

I’m figuring this whole faith thing out on a daily basis, just like you are. Some days I do good, some days I just suck. But all the days I am covered by grace. Not a grace that excuses my bad behavior, but one that takes me as I am but won’t leave me that way. Grace that is making me more like the Giver of Grace.

Well, that’s my report for May. Look for another random and disconnected blog from me in the near future.

 

The Face of God

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mosaic
I get emails from the Henri Nouwen Society with daily meditations on them. I thought today’s was especially good and reminded me of a blog I’d written a few years back. This one’s better.

I love the imagery and the idea that every believer carries the image of God, but only collectively can the true imago dei of God be seen and truly appreciated.

“A mosaic consists of thousands of little stones. Some are blue, some are green, some are yellow, some are gold. When we bring our faces close to the mosaic, we can admire the beauty of each stone. But as we step back from it, we can see that all these little stones reveal to us a beautiful picture, telling a story none of these stones can tell by itself.

“That is what our life in community is about. Each of us is like a little stone, but together we reveal the face of God to the world.  Nobody can say: ‘I make God visible.’  But others who see us together can say: ‘They make God visible.’ Community is where humility and glory touch.”

I think that says it all. People do see God in us individually, but people see God best when we are living in community. That’s where our unique gifts, talents, passions, and abilities come together to form something that collectively is more than the sum of its parts. That’s the Church.

So think about that the next time you’re gathered together with believers. You’re not just a group of people, but a work of art– a mosaic– displaying the great worth and glory of God.

4 Years Later

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Nashville-Flood-2010

A friend’s post reminded me that it’s been 4 years since the floods hit Nashville. If my memory serves, it was May 1-2 of 2010. Then again, my memory does tend to double-fault a lot these days [insert rim shot here].

I remember not being able to get to work because of flooded streets.

I remember seeing one of those big trailer school rooms floating down the interstate.

I remember hearing about people who had to be rescued from their cars and homes and who lost their possessions and homes due to flood waters.

It doesn’t seem like 4 years. In some ways it seems like yesterday and in some ways it seems like 20 years ago. If that made sense, then we probably share a brain.

I remember an inscription on the garage door in a neighborhood I was helping to clean out. It said, “Storms End, Love Shines, We Survive.” Or something like that.

And here we are, 4 years after the storm ended. Nashville is still standing. In fact, in many ways the city is better and bigger and stronger than it was then. Not to mention too many restaurants to keep up with.

It didn’t seem like that would be the case back then. There have been times in my own life when it didn’t seem like things would ever get back to being good again. I’m sure you’ve felt that way.

But somehow things get better. God has a way of taking the crap in your life and working it into something much better. Like maybe a garden. Or a new beginning.

The prophet Isaiah nailed it when he wrote: “When you face stormy seas I will be there with you with endurance and calm; you will not be engulfed in raging rivers. If it seems like you’re walking through fire with flames licking at your limbs, keep going; you won’t be burned.
Because I, the Eternal One, am your God. I am the Holy One of Israel, and I will save you” (Isaiah 43:2-3).

Whether it’s flood, fire, or difficult circumstances, your saving God is there. Remember that.

 

Throwing Rocks 2

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robin-wright-as-jenny-curran-in-forrest-gump

It almost always happens when I write one of these blogs that I will remember something I left out. In this case, it was when I woke up in the middle of the night around 2 am that I remembered what specifically I left out.

Maybe the person who needs your forgiveness the most is you.

Even if someone else did the wounding, it’s easy to blame yourself for letting it happen. Especially if the abuse went on for some time. You stayed and made excuses and didn’t run when you had the chance. So a part of you feels that you deserve what you got.

First of all, you don’t.

And second, you survived. You’re still here, which counts as a win in my book.

Sometimes, you just need to forgive yourself for not living up to your own unrealistic expectations. Or to the expectations that the culture and society has hoodwinked you into believing were essential to your success.

You need to know that God’s plan for you is your own and no one else’s. Maybe you’re not where everyone else seems to be at this point in your life. But you are where God put you. Where God wants you to be. Where God is using you and molding you and making you more like Jesus. And that is by far the best place to be.

I know I’d rather have Jesus and nothing else than to have everything else and not have Jesus.

So everything I said about laying those rocks down and building that altar still applies, even the person who you’re aiming at is your own reflection in the mirror. Let the altar be as a reminder of the time when you stopped letting your failures or unmet expectations or your shame define you. When you started to let your Creator define you.

I think that pretty much covers it.

Throwing Rocks

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10-Jenny-throwing-rocks

“I’ve been tryin’ to get down
to the Heart of the Matter
But everything changes
And my friends seem to scatter
But I think it’s about forgiveness
Forgiveness
Even if, even if you don’t love me anymore” (Don Henley).

Kairos was fantastic as usual tonight. Amy Jo Girardier spoke on forgiveness, which probably is something that doesn’t come easy to any of us. Especially those who carry the scars of wounds and words from those who were supposed to nourish and protect.

For some reason, I thought about the scene from Forrest Gump where Jenny is throwing rocks at her old house. It’s the place where her own father abused her for years, where all her woundedness came from. After she throws the last rock, she collapses on the ground into weeping. Forrest Gump say a line which I think is the best line in the whole movie: “Sometimes there aren’t enough rocks.”

jenny2

Unforgiveness is like carrying rocks. You visualize confronting the person or persons who cut you with their words, who betrayed your trust, who let you down, who deserted you in your time of need, who feigned friendship while sticking the knife in your back. You imagine what it would be like to use the rocks to wound them like they wounded you.

It seems like the natural thing to do. You have every right to be angry, to hurt, to want justice– even revenge.

But maybe what God is calling you to do is to take those rocks and build an altar. On that altar, you sacrifice your right to be angry. You give up expecting that the person can fix what they did to you. You let go of hatred and of wishing them harm. Instead you learn to pray for them and even eventually love them.

Then you realize you’re not the only one wounded. The person who hurt you was acting out of his own woundedness. He’s continuing the cycle of violence, of cutting words, of lashing out, because it’s all he knows.

Forgiveness breaks the cycle. Forgiveness opens the door of the prison of hate and anger and bitterness and the person who walks out is you. You are the one set free when you choose to forgive.

rocks

One of my favorite quotes from C. S. Lewis deals with forgiveness and the high cost that comes with it:

“To be a Christian means to forgive the inexcusable because God has forgiven the inexcusable in you.

This is hard. It is perhaps not so hard to forgive a single great injury. But to forgive the incessant provocations of daily life – to keep on forgiving the bossy mother-in-law, the bullying husband, the nagging wife, the selfish daughter, the deceitful son – How can we do it? Only, I think, by remembering where we stand, by meaning our words when we say in our prayers each night ‘Forgive our trespasses as we forgive those that trespass against us.’ We are offered forgiveness on no other terms. To refuse it is to refuse God’s mercy for ourselves. There is no hint of exceptions and God means what He says.”

Forgiveness is hard, but in my experience, not forgiving and carrying the weight and burden of all that anger, bitterness, and hurt is harder.

altar

Spring Storms

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image

This is the time of year for what I like to call spring. Actually, I’m sure everyone calls it spring.

It’s also the time for changing weather patterns and all those fun storms that come out of nowhere around this time of year.

Today was no exception. I think I saw warnings for tornados, thunderstorms, and flash floods, but I didn’t personally witness anything much more than some heavy rain.

I remember the old adage that April showers bring May flowers. Paul wrote something in Romans that echoes those words:

“And that’s not all. We also celebrate in seasons of suffering because we know that when we suffer we develop endurance, which shapes our characters. When our characters are refined, we learn what it means to hope and anticipate God’s goodness. And hope will never fail to satisfy our deepest need because the Holy Spirit that was given to us has flooded our hearts with God’s love” (Romans 5:3-5).

All the bad stuff we go through is not in vain. It makes us better people. Not only that but it leads to better things down the road.

There’s nothing bad that happens to any of us that God can’t turn into something good. Nothing. That’s one reason why I love God so much. I’ve seen many examples of that in my own life.

As always, I believe. Lord, help my unbelief.

Peter and Paul

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peter-and-paul movie_73

I remember watching a mini-series when I was a kid, probably 8 or 9. It was about the lives of the apostles Peter and Paul. It was titled, creatively enough, Peter and Paul.

I remember ever since then that whenever I read the words of Paul in one of his letters, I always hear Anthony Hopkins’ voice. I guess that means that the series had an impact on me.

I watched it again 30something years later. It’s not 100% accurate to the account of the Acts of the Apostles, as penned by Luke, but it gets the important stuff right. I’m reminded that the early believers paid a dear price for proclaiming their faith.

They were persecuted and belittled. Some were even tortured and killed. All for the name of Jesus. All for saying that Jesus, and not Caesar, is Lord.

I don’t have any reference to compare that to. I’ve never faced any real persecution for my beliefs. I’ve never face the choice of recanting or dying. I’ve never lost anything for professing what I believe.

I do think that at some foreseeable point in the future, we as American believers will have to sacrifice for our beliefs. It may cost us our jobs, our homes, our relationships. Even our lives and the lives of those we love.

I honestly hope I’d be brave enough to still profess Jesus as Lord, but I know me too well. Only by the grace of God given in that moment would I be able to hold fast to my faith in that hour. And no, I don’t think God gives me that strength to bear until the time when it is needed. Grace for the moment.

I do think that God asks us to be faithful in smaller matters so that when the big tests do come, we will be ready. If we’re faithful in the little things, God can entrust us with the larger matters.

Ultimately, it’s not about how strong my grip is to hold onto Jesus, but how strong His grip is to hold onto me. That’s what will get me though.

 

Expensive Mistakes, Shame, and other Random Tuesday Night Thoughts

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elizabethtowncap

Have you ever made an expensive mistake?

Immediately, I think of the movie Elizabethtown and the character Drew Baylor. He created a shoe which ended up costing the company he worked for close to $1 billion. It was, in his words, a fiasco.

There’s a great line from the movie:

“As somebody once said, there’s a difference between a failure and a fiasco. A failure is simply the non-present of success. Any fool can accomplish failure. But a fiasco, a fiasco is a disaster of mythic proportions. A fiasco is a folktale told to others, that makes other people feel more… alive. Because it didn’t happen to them.”

Maybe you’ve been there. Maybe your mistake wasn’t worth $1 billion. Maybe it was worth $10,000. Or maybe it just ruined a relationship. Or a reputation.

Maybe you feel the familiar nagging sensation of shame, never overpowering but always there, lurking nearby.

Tonight’s guest speaker at Kairos spoke of how two different people in the Bible dealt with shame in radically different ways:

Judas betrayed Jesus and ended up hanging himself, while Peter denied knowing Jesus and ended up hanging around. Not only that, the shame turned into an opportunity for God to use him in ways he probably never would have thought possible.

The speaker said something that I’ll never forget. He said something to the effect that Judas hung himself by his shame because he didn’t know that Jesus hung on the cross for his shame.

The cross means that shame has no more power over your (or my) life ever again. Shame has lost the power to speak into our lives because Jesus took those failures, those fiascos, those worst moments upon Himself on the cross. He took them to the grave, but when He arose on Easter morning, He left them behind, utterly defeated and powerless.

You are not defined by your fiascos or those moments of shame any longer. You are defined by what Jesus did for you and by who you are now in the power of His resurrection. You are defined as beloved child of God in whom He is well pleased.

Shame is all about your past. Jesus wants you to go forward and live in the future He has for you, not in that past any longer.

 

Easter Season Liturgy Part V

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ko1

“O God, Creator of heaven and earth:  Grant that, as the crucified body of your dear Son was laid in the tomb and rested on this holy Sabbath, so we may await with him the coming of the third day, and rise with him to newness of life; who now lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, for ever and ever. Amen.”

So I did the whole downtown Franklin thing again. It always does my heart good to be back there, revisiting my favorite haunts and breathing in the perfect spring night air.

I don’t really know what to do with the Saturday between Good Friday and Easter. It seems so low-key compared to the tragic drama of Friday and the joyful triumphant victory of Sunday.

But I know what’s coming. I wonder what those disciples were thinking and feeling. Or the Marys. It must have seemed like the lowest point of their lives. All of their hopes and dreams and been awakened and they had only just begun to hope, then it was dashed and broken to pieces beyond recognition.

The one they thought would save them was dead in a tomb. They had seem the bloodied body, seen the moment when the spear went into Jesus’ side and both blood and water poured out. There was no doubt.

I’m glad I’m on this side of history and I know what’s coming. I know with the next sunrise comes Sunday and the empty tomb and a risen Christ. That’s where my hope lies.

I can’t imagine people whose faith won’t allow for miracles or resurrections. Would that even be faith at all? What if Jesus’ death were only an example and the only way He lived was in the memories of His followers? What kind of hope would that be?

Only a literal resurrection can give true hope. Only a Jesus who’s really and truly alive, with the wounds in His hands, feet, and side, could inspire the joy of Easter. That’s why I can’t wait for tomorrow and the celebration that comes with it.