be yourself

Bearded Brawny Men and Other Ridiculousness

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paul-bunyan

Apparently, beards are in. I see guys wearing beards, growing beards, basically reveling in facial hair. I’m not so sure I’m a fan of it.

I don’t say that because my own facial hair is scanty. It takes me forever to grow anything close to resembling a beard, but I’m okay with that. I’m really not bitter about being beardless.

I just think it’s one thing to grow a beard and another to go for the Paul Bunyan look. I mean, what’s up with all the long scraggly beards? Is there a cult out there looking for another David Koresh?

I heard someone say that she was looking for bearded and burly in her men. I guess the blue ox and the red plaid shirt are optional. Hopefully the axe isn’t a requirement.

All that to say this. You be you. Don’t do something because everyone else is doing it. Don’t grow a beard because it’s suddenly fashionable. Life is way too short to live it for the sake of pleasing others.

If you really and truly want to grow a beard down to your knees, don’t listen to me. You go for it and you grow it. If you want to be clean-shaven, you do that.

I’ve been around long enough to know that these trends never stay very long. The more trendy you are today, the more likely it will be that your children will one day look at photos of you and laugh and say things like, “You actually went out in public dressed like that?”

So once again, you be you. Be yourself. In the words of one E. E. Cummings, “To be nobody but yourself in a world which is doing its best day and night to make you like everybody else means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight and never stop fighting.”

Don’t ever stop fighting to be you. Ever.

Philip Seymour Hoffman and the Struggle for Authenticity

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image

I was deeply saddened when I read of the passing of Philip Seymour Hoffman, one of the best character actors around. I like many of you was shocked to find out that drugs, and more specifically heroin, were the culprit for his demise.

I thought, “Why in the world would a guy as successful and talented as that need to medicate with drugs? What could possibly be so bad about his life?”

Then I read a blog or two about him that opened my eyes. I’ll do my best to simplify what I read there without plagiarizing anything or anyone.

Sometimes, character actors can lose themselves in their roles. They almost literally become the characters they’re portraying. Which is all well and good until it comes time to be yourself again.

I wonder if Philip had forgotten how to live in his own skin as himself? Or maybe he didn’t like who he was and preferred to live as someone else?

I know like so many addicts, he probably at some point chose the drug, but after a while it stopped being a choice. Unless the drug was the one who chose him.

I’m sure he hated the drug that he craved at the same time. Maybe he felt he was too far gone to save, too deep in his addiction to find a way out. Maybe he didn’t feel like he could let anyone into his battle with drugs and felt like he had to fight alone.

I’m speculating a lot here.

But I do know this. Jesus came to set the captives free.

He came for the addict. He came for the self-abuser. He came for those who don’t like what they see in the mirror and who don’t like themselves very much.

I’m not going to speculate as to whether Mr. Hoffman knew Jesus or not. Many believers get just as caught up in addictions and have just as many character flaws as anyone else.

I will say that God is close to the broken-hearted and those who are crushed in spirit. He’s near to those who cry out of desperation and deep need.

If you’re trapped in addiction, get help. Don’t fight your demons alone. And know that God is the champion of the downtrodden and distraught, the losers and underdogs, those who just can’t get their messes cleaned up or their lives figured out.

Last of all, remember that it’s only by the grace of God that it’s not you or me lying dead in a bathroom with a heroin-filled needle stuck in our arms. Only the grace of God keeps any of us alive and wakes us up in the morning.

Yeah, I still love the grace of God.

Rainy Thursday Night Reminders

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uncle billy

Side note: I thought about titling this “The You-niqueness of You,” but decided against it, because I actually want people to read it.

I think sometimes we have a “one size fits all” theology when it comes to how God operates in people’s lives. Testimonies have to be bloody and dramatic and have a pivotal moment when the main character hits absolute rock bottom and has no where to go but up.

But not all testimonies are like that. Some people grow up around church and get saved at an early age, but it took just as much of a miracle to save them as it did the drugged-up alcoholic who comes to Christ after a near-death experience. Both are equally valid testimonies and both can reach people.

Jesus never healed people the same way twice. Every call for people to follow him was as different as the individuals he called. God’s plan for your life is as unique as you are.

Don’t ever let people force God’s call on their lives on you. Don’t let other people define your life by their (or some other arbitrary) standard. Your life and your ministry are your own.

I love a story I read in Johnny Cash’s autobiography. He relates a story about how a music executive was looking for the next Randy Travis. Johnny Cash basically told him straight up, “What’s wrong with the Randy Travis you have?”

You are not called to be the next Billy Graham and save millions of souls. You are not called to be the next Mother Teresa. You are called to be you, just as I am called to be me.

Honestly, sometimes I get discouraged because my life doesn’t look like someone else’s. But God’s plan for me is my own. It may not look like your’s or anybody else’s, but it’s still mine.

The only question is this. Will you be faithful to God’s call on your life? Will you obey what you know God is calling you to do right now at this very moment? Will you accept where God has you as a gift and an opportunity to reach out to the people he’s put in front of you?