adultery

Pointing Fingers and Passing Blame

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“If my sinfulness appears to me to be in any way smaller or less detestable in comparison with the sins of others, I am still not recognizing my sinfulness at all. … How can I possibly serve another person in unfeigned humility if I seriously regard his sinfulness as worse than my own?” (Dietrich Bonhoeffer)

I think we all know that when you point the finger at someone, there are typically four fingers pointing back at yourself. Then there’s the story in the gospels where the religious leaders bring a woman caught in the act of adultery. They’re all about to stone her to death and expecting Jesus to give them the go-ahead, but Jesus instead says “Let him who is without sin cast the first stone.”

That’s a genius answer. Obviously, Jesus isn’t condoning her behavior (or the behavior of whoever was the other party in the act of adultery), but he’s saying that their sin of pride is just as evil in the sight of God as her act of adultery. They don’t get to make the call on the woman’s destiny. God does.

It’s easy to point the finger at public figures whose lives are on display. True, many of them have made dubious and questionable choices. To cast aspersions on their characters when we are just as fallen as the rest of humanity would be the height of hypocrisy.

I believe calling out sinful behavior is biblical, as long as it is done in love and humility from the perspective that I could have done the same or worse given the same circumstances.

What did Jesus do for us when we were at our worst? He demonstrated His love for us by dying for us. He paid the ultimate price so that we could be free from the sin that held us captive. He sent His Spirit so that we could have the power to live the kind of holy lives that please God.

When it comes to serving, it helps to remember the line from Philippians to regard others as better than ourselves and not to seek to vaunt ourselves at the expense of others. Love as God defines it seeks the best for the beloved as God did for us. Instead of pointing fingers, may we always point to Jesus.

That June Post

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“Our culture has accepted two lies. The first is that if you disagree with someone’s lifestyle, you must fear or hate them. The second is to love someone’s means you believe with everything they believe or do. Both are nonsense” (Rick Warren).

Yes, it’s June. These days they have created something called Pride Month where we are supposed to celebrate all things LGBTQ, etc. The thinking goes that if you love someone, you will love and endorse just about everything about them, and if you disagree with someone on any point, you must hate them.

That’s not true. I know and love people who are in the rainbow lifestyle, but I don’t endorse or agree with their lifestyle. I don’t hate them. I don’t wish them harm. I do pray for them and wish them true happiness.

I also don’t happen to see sexual sin as any worse than living together outside of marriage or adultery within the context of marriage. I don’t think someone else’s struggle with homosexuality is worse than my struggle with the sins of pride and envy.

Jesus loved people in the middle of their messes but didn’t leave them in their messes. He called prostitutes, tax collectors, and other sinners to follow Him. The best part is that when He was finished with His work, they weren’t prostitutes, tax collectors, or sinners any more. They were disciples. That was their new identity.

Did they still sin? Absolutely. But Jesus still loved them.

One of my favorite quotes that sums up the kind of love Jesus had for them (and for us) goes like this:

“Love loves unto purity. Love has ever in view the absolute loveliness of that which it beholds. Therefore all that is not beautiful in the beloved, all that comes between and is not of love’s kind, must be destroyed. And our God is a consuming fire” (George MacDonald).

For those of you in the LGBTQ lifestyle, my prayer is first and foremost that you fall in love with Jesus and surrender to Him fully. I don’t want you in heterosexual marriages as much as I want you to be fully devoted disciples of Jesus who confess and repent daily of their sins and let Jesus’ love transform them to be more like Jesus.

Ultimately, your identity is not your sexuality or your skin color or your ethnicity or your nationality or your tax bracket or your ancestry. Your primary identity is one made by God who bears the image of God, called into relationship with God to be a son or daughter of God.

Out of Control

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Has there ever been a moment in your life when you felt out of control? Like when you stopped and looked around and wondered how in the heck you got there and how you’d ever get out of the mess you’d made?

I think EVERYBODY has felt that way to some degree or other. Kinda like King David, who started out lusting after a neighbor’s wife and ended up with not only adultery but lying and mass murder thrown in. It took a bold prophet named Nathan to get David out of his downward spiral.

You will at some point get yourself into a hot mess. You will wonder how you could have been so STUPID. You may well wonder if escape is even a possibility.

I love what I heard someone say: it’s never too late on this side of heaven to become what you might have been. It’s never too late to become the dream God had when He thought you up and gave you a purpose before anything was made. That gives me hope.

That means that those days that seem wasted, those years that seem lost have really served a purpose– to get you to where you are, with all your life experiences, good and bad, all your successes and failures– to be the person God can use to do what NO ONE else can do, to the calling only YOU can fulfill.

Even if you’re an 80-year old backwoods shepherd like Moses. Or a nobody sitting in a prison like Joseph.

God can take nobodies and confound all those who think they’re somebodies. He uses the lowly and the nothings in the world to shame all those who think they’re hot stuff. That’s my take on 1 Corinthians 1:25-30. Or as one translation puts it:

“You can count on this: God’s foolishness will always be wiser than mere human wisdom, and God’s weakness will always be stronger than mere human strength.

Look carefully at your call, brothers and sisters. By human standards, not many of you are deemed to be wise. Not many are considered powerful. Not many of you come from royalty, right? But celebrate this: God selected the world’s foolish to bring shame upon those who think they are wise; likewise, He selected the world’s weak to bring disgrace upon those who think they are strong. God selected the common and the castoff, whatever lacks status, so He could invalidate the claims of those who think those things are significant. So it makes no sense for any person to boast in God’s presence. Instead, credit God with your new situation: you are united with Jesus the Anointed. He is God’s wisdom for us and more. He is our righteousness and holiness and redemption.”

 

Frump Girl and God’s Grace

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Ian Miller: I know this great place… Zorba something… anyway, I’d love to take you there if you’d like to go.
Toula Portokalos: Uh, that place, Dancing Zorba’s…
Ian Miller: Dancing Zorba’s!
Toula Portokalos: My family kinda owns that place.
Ian Miller: [looking at her closely] I remember you. You’re that waitress.
Toula Portokalos: Seating hostess.
Ian Miller: I remember you.
Toula Portokalos: Look, I was going through a phase. . . up until now. I was Frump Girl.
Ian Miller: I don’t remember Frump Girl, but I remember you. (from My Big Fat Greek Wedding).

I love that last line. What Ian is saying is that he saw past the awkwardness and the insecurity to the inner beauty waiting to be revealed. An inner beauty that he had a hand in unveiling.

Sometimes with God, I feel like saying, “God, remember me? That promise-breaker? That doubter? That worrier?”

God’s response would be, “I don’t remember Promise-Breaker or Doubter or Worrier, but I remember you.”

You might remind God of a past addiction to pornography or alcohol or status. You might throw in adultery (like David), or deceit (like Jacob), or outright lying (like Abraham). You might show God Polaroids of the wreck your life used to be. God doesn’t see that.

What does God see?  Thanks to the cross, God sees you as though you had never sinned, never broken a promise, never doubted, never wavered in your faith at all.

He looks at you and sees the finished product, the stunning reveal. He looks at you right now and sees Jesus in all His perfection and glory. And He likes what He sees.

Better yet, He’s wildly in love with what He sees.

I know the mirror’s not a fun place to look at 5:30 am on a Monday morning. There can be some scary critters looking back.

But remember God not only has claimed you and renamed you, but He has redefined your past. Once you were an enemy, now you are an heir and a child of God. Your past no longer dictates your future. God does.

Just think about that and see how it changes your week.

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More Lessons from Kairos

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Tonight, Mike Glenn spoke about King David, literally the runt of the litter who became the most famous king in the history of Israel. You know it’s bad when you’re father forgets about you when counting his own sons and has to be reminded about you.

There are several ways to define David as a man and as a king. You could define him by his military successes and his lengthy reign as king. You could also define him as someone who made several tragically bad choices, starting off with gazing a bit too long at Bathsheeba in the buff. If you haven’t read the whole story, I’ll keep it brief and just say that the story involved adultery, bribery, lying, more bribery, more lying, and (to top it all off) murder. Not to mention a cover-up that would would have made national headlines even today.

But the Bible defines David a different way. David is spoken of as a man after God’s own heart. Not as an adulterer, not as a murderer. But a man after God’s own heart.

It took God’s prophet speaking some fairly harsh words to get David’s attention, but all you have to do is read Psalm 51 to see what true brokenness and repentance looks like. David wasn’t just sorry for his sins. He didn’t just feel bad and promise never to do those things again. From that point on, he was a different man.

To be sure, his sin had consequences. He had strife within his kingdom and even within his own family from then on. But he knew where to go when the troubles and storms came. God was his safe refuge in the tempest, a strong fortress, a cleft in the rock for him to hide in.

You may have a dirty secret you don’t want anyone to know about. You may have made horrendously poor choices and have lingering regrets that you live with on a daily basis. That doesn’t have to define you. That doesn’t have to dictate who you are or where you’re going.

Let God’s love define you. Let God’s forgiveness dictate your future. May you hear the voice of your Abba Father calling you the Beloved and may you not only hear it, but believe it and live in it every single day.