Poverty of Spirit

“What is my barrenness? It is the platform for His fruit-creating power. What is my desolation? It is the black setting for the sapphire of His everlasting love.

“I will go in poverty, I will go in helplessness, I will go in all my shame and backsliding, I will tell Him that I am still His child, and in confidence in His faithful heart, even I, the barren one, will sing and cry aloud.” (Charles Spurgeon)

That’s what it means to be poor in spirit, the very ones Jesus called blessed in the Beatitudes.

It feels very much counter-cultural, even in Christian circles.

While the Apostle Paul was proud to be able to boast in his weakness, knowing that’s where God’s power is perfected, we’re supposed to always present the happiest, shiniest version of ourselves. Just look at social media to see how well we’ve perfected the facade.

But Jesus longs for us to be our true selves. Come to me, He says, all who can finally admit that they’re weary and exhausted and overwhelmed by life, and I will give you the rest you crave.

I honestly had a good day today. But there are still times when I have to confess that I can’t do anything apart from God’s providential care. I need Jesus just as much on a good day as on those days where I can’t seem to do anything right.

I still do the prayer where as you inhale you proclaim, “Abba Father,” and as you exhale you say, “I belong to You.”

That’s still a good way to keep centered and remind yourself of Who’s really in charge of your day and your life. Spoiler alert: not you.

May we come to the place where we can finally take off the masks of perfection and performance and finally be our true selves, embracing and encouraging each other instead of envying and competing with each other.

Abba Father, we belong to You.

Thinking of Texas Tonight

 “Do not be afraid—I will save you.
    I have called you by name—you are mine.
When you pass through deep waters, I will be with you;
    your troubles will not overwhelm you.
When you pass through fire, you will not be burned;
    the hard trials that come will not hurt you.
For I am the Lord your God,
    the holy God of Israel, who saves you” (Isaiah 43:1-3, GNT).

I’m seeing pictures and hearing stories out of Texas about the complete devastation from the hurricane and flooding. So many people have lost everything. Some have even lost their lives. I know that the waters are rising and the rain never seems to stop.

It seems that natural disasters and tragedies like this have a way of snapping your priorities back into place. All those trinkets you chase after don’t seem nearly as important as before.

It brings back memories of when Nashville had its own flooding back in 2010. I can’t imagine watching helplessly as all your possessions and heirlooms are lost forever in the waters.

I do know that God Almighty has promised to be present with those in the midst of deep waters. No amount of storms or floods can ever separate any of us from the unfathomable love of Christ.

Lord, be with those who are wading through the deep waters tonight in Texas. Let Your peace that passes all understanding guard their hearts and minds tonight. May Your grace be sufficient for them and Your comforting presence be near to all whose hearts are heavy.

May all find that you are a Shelter in the midst of the storm, and a Strong Tower and Refuge to those in time of need. May all find that underneath are the Everlasting Arms that won’t ever let go.

May Your people be Your tangible presence as they go to where the need is keenest to be with the people who have lost everything. More than any money or material goods we can give, may we be the face of Christ to all those we serve.

Amen.

 

Radnor Lake and Patsy Cline


I think I picked a perfect evening for a hike at Radnor Lake State Park. Apparently, the rain earlier in the day scared off most people, so there were precious few hikers who were able to witness a picture perfect day for the woods.

It came within a hairsbreadth of fall weather. A few degrees cooler and it would have been autumn. Still, it made for an enjoyable walk. I saw 13 deer, so they had the same idea about getting out in the cooler weather.

On the way home, I had Patsy Cline playing in the car. I’m fairly certain that she wrung every ounce of emotion out of every song she ever sang. She didn’t have to write her songs to bring authenticity to them; she lived the songs.

I’m convinced that she was a once in a lifetime kind of talent that left us way too soon. Still, she left us with a treasure trove of songs full of heartbreak and loss and love found. If you don’t believe me, listen to her version of Faded Love, by far the most gut-wrenching version of the song ever recorded.

It’s been a good Monday. That almost seems like an oxymoron, but I still believe that any day can be a good day if you only choose to look for the good in it and thank God for it.

So, thanks to Radnor Lake State Park and the musical legacy of Patsy Cline, I’d call this Monday a win.

Longing for the Word

“Christians are persons who no longer seek their salvation, their deliverance, their justification in themselves, but in Jesus Christ alone. They know that God’s Word in Jesus Christ pronounces them guilty, even when they feel nothing of their own guilt, and that God’s Word in Jesus Christ pronounces them free and righteous even when they feel nothing of their own righteousness…

Because they daily hunger and thirst for righteousness, they long for the redeeming Word again and again. It can only come from the outside. In themselves they are destitute and dead. Help must come from the outside; and it has come and comes daily and anew in the Word of Jesus Christ, bringing us redemption, righteousness, innocence, and blessedness. But God put this Word into the mouth of human beings so that it may be passed on to others. When people are deeply affected by the Word, they tell it to other people. God has willed that we should seek and find God’s living Word in the testimony of other Christians, in the mouths of human beings. Therefore, Christians need other Christians who speak God’s Word to them. They need them again and again when they become uncertain and disheartened” (Dietrich Bonhoeffer).

One question: when last did you long for the word of God? When did you last hunger and thirst for Scripture?

These are questions not meant to guilt you into picking up your Bible, but to gauge where you and I are spiritually. I know for me if the Bible is the last thought in my mind when I have some down time, it means that I am in a spiritually vulnerable place.

May God grant each of us a desire for His word that outweighs all other appetites, even physical ones, so that we can search the pages of His word and find Him there.

Amen.

 

This Life Matters

I volunteered today through Walk of Love to serve food to the surrounding community of low-income housing. 

First, we put together the bags of snacks in a well-organized and efficient yet completely fun way. Then we took to the streets and the homes to hand them out to anyone who’d take one.

As I was walking, a thought occurred to me. We talk an awful lot about how black lives matter or how police lives matter, but how many will look at someone living in poverty and say, “This specific life matters”?

When you put a face to the issue instructor of keeping it on a theoretical level, it changes everything. It becomes about serving Jesus in His most distressing disguise, as Mother Teresa once said.

It’s about repenting of the notion that the people I’m serving are somehow lesser or beneath me, like I’m condescending to meet their needs, but rather understanding that we’re both broken and just as much in need of saving grace as anyone who ever lived. It’s knowing that we both equally bear the Imago Dei, the image of God.

I love how the Walk of Love ministry is right in the middle of the community, getting to know the people and listening to their stories, working with them instead of merely doing things for them.

That’s the kind of service that changes lives and communities. That’s the kind of love that changes the world.

A Low-Key Friday Night

You ask, “So how did you spend your Friday night? Were you out painting the town red? Did you have thrilling escapades? Do you have exciting tales to tell?”

Well, I spent my Friday night hanging out with my 4-month old kitten and completing mock drafts for my company’s upcoming fantasy football league draft on Sunday.

How exciting is that?

Oh, I almost forgot. I had my fine dining experience at Taco Bell, followed by some time spent rummaging and searching for treasures at Goodwill.

All in all, it was a low-key Friday night, which I needed after a 4-day work week which seemed a lot longer because I felt I was scrambling to catch up the whole entire week.

Again, I could complain or I could choose to see that I still have gainful employment and actually accomplished something of value this week.

I feel like I’m ready for the draft. My last three mock drafts got A+, A+, and A grades. My strategy is starting to come to fruition. As Hannibal Smith from the A-team used to say, “I love it when a plan comes together.”

Don’t worry. I have more ambitious plans for the rest of the weekend. I just thought it’d be good to have one evening of chillaxing. I’d definitely call the evening a success.

 

A Bigger Bravery

“…[It’s been a ] long day & you’ve had big, hard things coming at you. You may not even be saying it out loud — but really? It’s hard to keep showing up when it’d be easier to give up.
But can you hear Him this evening?
‘Just Call to Me. I guarantee I will answer you.
*I will make you strong & brave.*’ (Ps.138:3MSG)
Ask Him — He will come & make you strong & brave for the Hard Things.
So that’s the plan as we look to the weekend: Be Brave.
And do not pray for the hard thing to go away.
But pray for a Bravery to come that’s *bigger than the Hard Thing.*” 
#JesusMakesMeBrave (Ann Voskamp)

Why is it that 4-day work weeks always seem longer and harder than the regular 5-day versions? Maybe it’s because you feel like you’re expending all your energy in a futile quest to catch up from what you missed on that one day off.

Honestly, it wasn’t a hard week for me. It just felt looooong. And there’s one more day to go.

The flip side is that I received the incredible gift of a day off so I could witness a solar eclipse that I probably won’t see the likes of again in my life time. I still have a job for the 4 days, and the tired I’m feeling is the good, productive kind of tired.

The hard things generally don’t tend to go away. They seem to always morph into some other shape, but the difficulties remain. The good news of the Gospel isn’t that you can have your best life now, free from any trials or hardships, but that while you endure much in this life, the best is still yet to come (in the words of ol’ Blue Eyes himself, Frank Sinatra).

So hold on. Friday’s almost here. The best is still yet to come.

 

 

More Lucy Memories

Lost in all the hoopla about the solar eclipse, Monday, August 21, marked two months since my Lucy crossed the rainbow bridge. While I have Peanut, my lovable and playful kitten to heal my heart, I still find myself at times missing the old gal fiercely.

Tonight, I stood at the railing overlooking the stairs. I remembered how Lucy used to look up from the bottom, see me, and come running up the stairs to me. Every single time. Even when she was older and couldn’t run as well, she still willed herself to run to me, greeting me with her friendly chatter.

I remember how when I got home and found her in one of her usual napping spots, the first thing she did when she saw me was let out the hugest yawn ever. I believe it wasn’t because she found me incredibly boring but rather because she was completely relaxed and at ease with me.

I’m finding out these days that it’s possible to carry around two conflicting and completely opposite emotions at the same time. For me, it’s joy and grief, peace and longing. Sometimes, it’s hard to know where the one ends and the other begins.

It’s another reminder of the “now and not yet.” Sure, there’s good to be found here and we can have the peace of Christ, but we wait the perfect consummation of all our hopes and joys. We know that we were made for another and better world — heaven– and we have a longing and a desire that nothing earthly can satisfy.

I do wish that rainbow bridge had visiting hours. I’d go see my Lucy every chance I got. I bet she’d come running up to me and greet me with that ginormous yawn of hers. I would expect nothing less.

Gracefully Broken

“Here I am, God
Arms wide open
Pouring out my life
Gracefully broken” (Matt Redman).

The prayer from tonight’s Kairos went something like this: Lord, into your hands I commit my brokenness.

That’s a good prayer for those of us who know that we are broken. After all, all of us are broken, but it’s more apparent in some. Not all of us are quite ready to admit it.

Some hide it and pretend it isn’t there.

Some make light of it and pretend that it doesn’t matter.

Some will act as if there’s nothing wrong with it the way it is.

The best way is to acknowledge it and give the pieces to Jesus.

There’s a kind of Japanese pottery called Kintsugi that takes broken vessels and mends them, using lacquer dusted or mixed with powdered gold. That way the cracks and imperfections aren’t hidden, but rather enhanced.

Rather than seeing beauty as flawless perfection, they see it as something that emerges out of a long history of suffering and survival.

Scars are what happens when the wounds of our broken places heal. Again, some will try to hide their scars and pretend they don’t exist.

My favorite writer, the one these blog posts are named after, one said, “On the last day, Jesus will look us over not for medals, diplomas, or honors, but for scars” (Brennan Manning).

Jesus chose to keep His scars in His resurrected body. He ascended into heaven with them. That says something about the honor and beauty of scars.

One quote from Kairos that stood out to me also came from an unlikely (at least to me) source, Ernest Hemingway. He said, “The world breaks every one and afterward many are strong at the broken places.”

I like that.

Brokenness and scars not only can become beautiful, but in the nail-scarred hands of Jesus, they are beautiful.

PS Much of the credit for this blog post goes to Chris Brooks, Kairos pastor, and to the good folks at Google for providing the information on Kintsugi that I “borrowed.” It’s a good thing this isn’t a term paper, or I’d be in serious trouble.

 

The Apoc-eclipse Has Come!

Today, August 21, 2017, will be known as the day that I officially saw a solar eclipse. With my solar eclipse glasses firmly in place, of course. Going blind from retina damage is definitely not on my bucket list.

It started around 11:58 with the total eclipse part coming in at 1:30. It was amazing. It helped that my viewing location was at my sister’s neighborhood pool.

The verse in the Psalms comes to mind about the heavens declaring the glory of God and the skies proclaiming the work of His hands, and I can’t think of any other time when that was more evident than today. Truly, it was as much a work of art as it was a natural phenomenon.

I’m not sure I can fully explain all that goes into an eclipse, or what it happens. I can say that I’m thankful to have seen it at least once in my life time.

One element that will stick with me is the phenomenon known as shadow snakes. Just before and just after the moon covers the surface of the sun, apparitions can sometimes appear on the ground that look to the casual observer like snakes crawling away. To me, they looked more like reflections of rippling water in a pond.

I’m sure my new kitten Peanut was confused by it getting dark in the middle of the day. Or possibly she used it as a good excuse for taking a nap– the Johnson tradition.

I’m also thankful that my boss decided to give us all the day off to experience this phenomenon with our friends, family, and other loved ones.

PS On a sad side note, I realized today that it’s been exactly two months since my beloved Lucy crossed the rainbow bridge. I still miss her and think about her at some point every day. I still wish that rainbow bridge had visiting hours.

I will always love and miss you, Lucy.