truth

For Those Who Have Doubts: From Kairos Tonight

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I love the question John the Baptist asked. He was in prison for speaking the truth against Herrod and he send his disciples over to Jesus to ask, “Are you the One or should we look for someone else?”

I love that question because that’s somethng I’ve wanted to ask at times but never been brave enough or honest enough to admit it.

I’ve had my doubts. So have you, probably. Jesus is big enough to handle our doubts and answer the questions we have.

His answer to John the Baptist was this, in essence: “Yes, I’m the One. I’ve made lame people walk, blind people see, given poor people hope, and raised dead people to live.”

I think His answer to you and me would be something like this

“For those who have staked their very lives on Me, I prove Myself to be the Supply to your every need, the Comfort to your every pain, the Deliverance in your every trial, and the unquenchable hope in each and every circumstance you have ever or will ever face.

I am the God’s YES and AMEN. I am the fulfillment of every one of His promises. I am the One who holds you together and keeps your hope alive. I am your Hope.

Your doubt doesn’t negate my Sovereignty. Your weakness doesn’t negate my Strength. Your failings don’t negate my ultimate victory.

I am the Ultimate Promise Keeper and my ultimate promise is to complete what I started in you, to make you whole and healed and free, to see you become all I meant for you to be when I made you.

Trust in me when circunstances tell you not to, when common sense tells you not to, when your own senses and feelings tell you not to. They may lie to you, but I never will.

I have set My affections on you and My love for you is stronger than your weakness or doubt. It’s stronger than your fear. It’s stronger than any foe you will face or any obstacle that blocks your way. My love for you is even stronger than death.

I will get you Home.”

 

Voted Off The Island??

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For the record, I have never watched a single episode of Survivor. Not even part of one. That may be what goes on my tombstone. “Here lies Greg Johnson. He never watched even a single episode of Survivor. What was wrong with him?”

I do have days when I feel like I got voted off the island. You know, those days when you post something clever or witty or profound on facebook and the only response you get back is the sound of crickets chirping in the field?

Or the days when you feel like you’re the odd man out in a gathering of people?

I’ve had days when I felt invisible, when it seemed like people looked through me, but never at me, and never saw me. It is true that you can be in a crowd and be alone, because I’ve been there plenty of times.

I keep coming back to the words of Jesus: “I will never leave you or forsake you.” Those words are just as true on the days when you are cracking the jokes that make everyone laugh and on the days when you have trouble forming complete sentences.

The words are true whether you feel them or not. Whether you feel Him or not.

The old footprints in the sand poem is a bit corny, but true. Even when you only saw one set of footprints in the sand, it was not because you were ever truly alone, but because you were being carried.

People are human beings (wow, what a revelation) with human frailties and with problems of their own. They may not see your pain because they are too busy dealing with their own. And everyone I have ever met has secrets and scars and shame. No exceptions.

Remind yourself when you feel alone that you’re not alone, for God is with you.

Oh, and by the way, I prefer Gillian’s Island to Survivor. I like my television as unrealistic as possible. But you would think that if the Professor could make a radio out of a coconut, he could fix a hole in the S.S. Minnow, right?

Singleness of Purpose and Action: A Confession

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It’s time for another one of my soul-cleansing confession blogs where I ‘fess up to messing up. Better that than me eventually winding up on Jerry Springer right after the gay, cross-dressing nympho Quakers. That would be awkward.

Lord, I confess that I’ve spent way too much time and energy striving to be noticed and liked and appreciated. I haven’t spent nearly as much time trying to be faithful and righteous and God-honoring.

I confess that I’ve attempted to impress others with my Bible knowledge, yet I’ve hardly picked up my Bible except to parade it around so that others think of me as oh-so-very-super-spiritual.

I confess that I’ve been trying to knock down the doors that You closed on me for a very good reason. I’ve been fighting You for something I don’t really want rather than taking what You give that I need (to borrow from the great theologian Rich Mullins).

I confess that You’ve become a means to my own ends instead of my Ultimate End and Joy.

I confess that I’ve trusted in what I think and what I feel instead of trusting in what I know to be true of You and Who You have proved Yourself to be to me over and over. I’ve listened to my fears way too many times instead of waiting for the Still Small Voice that says good things about me and speaks peace into my chaos.

I confess that I have put myself in the spotlight that only You deserve and my goal has been for others to make much of me instead of making much of You.

I confess that I am weary from chasing rabbit-holes and dead end paths and roads that go nowhere but lead back to themselves. I confess that I have lost my first Love.

Help me to hunger and thirst for Your Word more than any meal and to seek You with all my heart and soul and strength and mind.

Help me to have a singleness of purpose and of action so that people see in me what it looks like to truly honor God and they find out the greatness of this God and are drawn not to me, but to Him.

Chances are, this is your prayer, too. Chances are you’ve fallen into the same trap of self-worship that I have. I hope you know that you’re not the only one who struggles with this from time to time.

My hope is that we can encourage each other to follow hard after Jesus and to seek purity of heart in everything we say and do.

Amen.

A Reminder to Myself

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I wrote this a couple of years ago as a declaration of sorts. It was mostly for me so that whenever I got discouraged or felt like giving up or got off track in my priorities, I could remind myself of who I’m really chasing after and serving. It’s my own version of Habakkuk 3:17-18.

Though my plans disintegrate and my aspirations die, though my dreams shatter and my goals are thwarted, even if no woman ever is romantically interested in me and all my friends leave me, though I never have another visible reminder of God’s presence or spiritual comfort, if all I have in life is God and only God, I will lift my hands up to Heaven and proclaim that my Yahweh is good to me. My Yahweh is AWESOME!!!

I challenge you to write your own version to remind yourself of the goodness of Yahweh so that when everything seels to be going wrong and it feels like everyone has turned their backs on you and left you, you can have the reminder of God’s faithfulness. Of course, the original is the best and it speaks volumes to me every time I read it. I may not have crops or livestock, but the truth contained is just as relevant for me as it was for the original hearers way back when.

No matter what happens, God remains faithful. Even when all my worst fears come true, He’s still worthy of the best of my praise and worship. If nothing comes out like I planned or hoped it would, God is still God and He’s still in charge.

Remember that in the good and bad days, in the sunshine and in the storms, because it’s what will sustain you through all the seasons.

Some Things I Wish You Could See

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The media and the culture of the day tell you all the things you are not. They remind you constantly of all that you don’t have, all that you lack, all that you should be, etc. If you listen to the television and the radio and read the internet and magazines, you feel like you aren’t worth very much and that you’re not pretty enough or rich enough or suave enough. In short, you’re not enough.

But I am telling you a different story. I want you to hear it here, even if you’ve never heard it anywhere else. It’s not really my story, but the one God told me that I am telling you now.

God says you are enough. God says, “I made you and when I was done, I didn’t say, ‘Close Enough’ or ‘That’ll have to do,’ but ‘It is very good.’

Paul talks about how you are God’s masterpiece, created to do the great things He planned for you to do long ago. He made you perfect and He made you with a purpose. That means you are exactly who God wanted you to look like. That means you are not a waste of space or meaningless, but priceless.

I wish you could see yourself through God’s eyes. I wish you could see that Jesus thought you were to die for and worth all His precious blood. I wish you could see not all your shorcomings and failures and inadequacies, but the image of God in you. I wish you could hear not all the names you’ve ever been called in anger or frustration, but the name God calls you in love: BELOVED.

The media will lie to you. What you read and hear and see all around you will lie to you. Sometimes, even what you think and feel will lie to you. But God never will. What He says is true and trumps whatever anybody has ever or will ever say about you.

That’s what I wish you could see and believe and hold on to in the hard times. Because that’s the truth, and the truth will set you free.

More Random Things I’m Thankful For

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I mentioned some of the things I’m thankful for a couple of blogs back and I decided to add these to the list:

1. Getting to sleep in on certain Saturdays. It’s nice to be able to look at 5:30 am on the alarm clock and roll over and go back to sleep.

2. Good stories that make me lose track of time, whether they be in books or movies or TV shows.

3. That who I am is who God tells me I am, not who I or anyone else tells me I am. Not what I’ve done. Not my mistakes or failures or even my good deeds. I am God’s beloved.

4. That this is not one of those essays that has to be 500 words or else I get counted off on my grade.

5. The peace that transcends all understanding and comes when I least expect it and need it most.

6. Grace.

7. That I know so many awesome people who have inspired me and challenged me and loved me and made me want to be more like Jesus.

8. That the best things in life are still free.

9. That when I press “publish” some little men inside my computer box will make this go out over that great and mysterious internet to people I may never meet but who may be inspired to find something of their own to be thankful for and find the God from whom all these blessings flow.

Who Believes In You?

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Maybe you’ve had the kind of day where all your mistakes pile up and come crashing down on you like an avalanche. Maybe you feel buried underneath all the weight of your mistakes and bad decisions and failures. Maybe you believe in your heart that you’ve screwed up one too many times and exhausted all your grace cards.

Maybe some of the people in your life have quit believing in you or that you will ever amount to anything. Maybe your friends have quit believing in you and moved on. Maybe your family quit believing in you that there is any hope left that you will ever amount to anything. Maybe you quit believing in yourself.

I am here with some very good news.

God still believes in you. God hasn’t quit believing in you nor will He ever. He believes in what He’s doing in you, in the work He started so very long ago, before you were even born or were even a glimmer in your parent’s eye.

When you’ve given up hoping and believing that you will ever amount to anything, God knows that when He’s done with you, you will look just like Jesus. When you’ve just about thrown in the towel on all your hopes and dreams for a better future, God still has dreams for you that are so much bigger than the wildest, craziest dreams you ever dared to dream for yourself

When you’ve lost all hope, remember that God invented hope. As long as God is alive and on your side, you always have hope. Not a wishful thinking, “I hope my team wins on Sunday” kind of hope, either. This hope is as sure as the promises God made to you, and as certain as the God who made them.

God believes in you. God loves you more than your mind will ever be able to comprehend. No matter what anyone else tells you, no matter what you have told yourself in the darkness of your room when you’re alone, God speaks a better word. His word trumps any other word ever spoken to or about you.

And this is His word to you now: I believe in you and I am very fond of you and when I’m done, you will be everything I meant for you to be. You will be just like Jesus.

Takeaways from Kairos Tonight

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I feel like I blew it the last few days. I said and texted and posted some stuff that I now wish I could take back. In fact, there are whole sections of the last day or two that I wish I could have a do-over on. Today, I let fear and worry take over and I listened to them instead of the voice of the One who calls me Beloved and says good things about me.

In Kairos, I was reminded that the Gospel is about God’s YES rather than God’s NO. While the world and those around you may be telling you all the things you are not: not skinny enough, not pretty enough, not rich enough, not talented enough, etc. Sometimes, even you feel that you don’t measure up or have what it takes.

The Gospel doesn’t start with how bad off you are. The Gospel isn’t about how much of a sinner you are and how wide you’re going to bust hell open. The Gospel starts, “For God so loved the world.” For God so loved YOU that He gave His only, unique, one-of-a-kind, never-to-be-another Son, so that if YOU believe in Him, YOU will not perish but YOU will have eternal life.

On those days when what you want to say sounds right in your head but comes out totally wrong out of your mouth or through your text, God loves you. When you completely give in to the anger and frustration and completely lose your religion, God still loves you. When you forget who you are in Christ and start trying to find someone or something to define you and make you complete, God still loves you. And He always will.

Brennan Manning said, “Tragedy is that our attention centers on what people are not, rather than on what they are and who they might become.” God sees not what we are not and all we lack, but who we are, His sons and daughters whom He loves and died for. He sees who we will be and He reminds of our future selves who are fully complete and mature and just like Jesus. That’s what we’re becoming.

All that from a sermon I heard tonight at Kairos. I’d say I needed to hear it. I hope you did, too. If nothing else, remember what I always say: Your Abba is very fond of you and is not even close to giving up on you, even if others are or even if you are. That’s the truth. Live out of that.

 

The One Jesus Loved Dearly

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I’m in the middle of reading through the Gospel of John. That probably would earn me bonus points until I point out the fact that I am reading out of The Message version. So much for the bonus points. FYI Just kidding about the whole bonus points thing. You only get bonus points if you can read out of the original Greek.

In John 13, John refers to himself as “the disciple Jesus loved.” I really like how the Message renders it– “the one Jesus loved dearly.” That got me thinking. How do I see myself most of the time and how do you see yourself most of the time?

As the one who can’t go through a single day without making a stupid mistake?

As the one who opens his or her mouth and inserts his or her foot repeatedly?

As the one who runs friends off and who always hears about great parties but is never invited to any?

As the one who has already blown your 2012 resolutions to smithereens?

As the one who couldn’t save the marriage or stay clean or hold back the words spoken in anger that drove someone away or keep the vows you made?

I could go on and on and on. The list is endless. I’m sure you could add many to the list.

John the Apostle could have probably added his own list of names– such as the one who lost his temper a lot, or the one who wanted Jesus to smite those Samaritans, or the one who deserted Jesus in his hour of greatest need.

Yet the one John chooses to call himself, the one he refers to himself as, is the one Jesus loved dearly.

That’s you. Once Jesus found you and saved you, you were no longer owned by any of the names you gave yourself or the names your father or mother or anyone else gave you. Your identity was changed forever to the Beloved, the one Jesus loves dearly.

It’s good to remind yourself of this fact when you have screwed up for the 55th time and it’s not even lunchtime. It’s good to remember this when you have spoken words that you immediately wish you could pull back and say differently. No matter what you’ve done, these words are still true and nothing you do will change that.

You are and will always be the one Jesus loves dearly.

My New Year’s Wish for You in 2012

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This poem, written by Dietrich Bonhoeffer, seems just as appropriate and relevant today as it did in 1945 when Bonhoeffer wrote it while in a Gestapo prison in Berlin. This poem is my prayer for you this first day of 2012 and every day after.

“With every power for good to stay and guide me,
comforted and inspired beyond all fear,
I’ll live these days with you in thought beside me,
and pass, with you, into the coming year.

The old year still torments our hearts, unhastening:
the long days of our sorrow still endure.
Father, grant to the soul Thou hast been chastening
that Thou hast promised the healing and the cure.

Should it be ours to drain the cup of grieving
even to the dregs of pain, at Thy command,
we will not falter, thankfully receiving
all that is given by Thy loving hand.

But, should it be Thy will once more to release us
to life’s enjoyment and its good sunshine,
that we’ve learned from sorrow shall increase us
and all our life be dedicate as Thine.

Today, let candles shed their radiant greeting:
lo, on our darkness are they not Thy light,
leading us haply to our longed-for meeting?
Thou canst illumine e’en our darkest night.

When now the silence deepens for our harkening,
grant we may hear Thy children’s voices raise
from all the unseen world around us darkening
their universal paean, in Thy praise.

While all the powers of good aid and attend us,
boldly we’ll face the future, be it what may.
At even, and at morn, God will befriend us,
and oh, most surely on each new year’s day”