spirituality

What If?

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questions

 

I went running today for the first time in over two weeks after I tweaked my knee. I felt great. My knee felt great. And I found out that I’m not the world’s slowest runner after all. There’s at least one person out there slower than me, and I know because I passed her.

But then I got to thinking. What if my knee had been messed up to the point where I couldn’t ever run again? Would I still be thankful?

Or what if I lost my health? Would I still be able to wake up in the morning with gratitude for another day of being alive?

What if I lost my friends and family? Would I still be able to worship with a sincere heart and sing about the goodness of God?

What if God took away from me everything and everyone that I daily take for granted? What and who would I have left? Would I have anything at all left?

Would I still be able to praise Jesus for saving me if he never did one more thing for me?

Could I live a life of thanksgiving to my God for who he is if I never saw another visible sign of his presence?

Is God and God alone truly enough for me?

I wish I could say yes, but I find myself leaning on other crutches when I get tired or stressed or upset. I find myself thinking more about other things and people than about God. Sometimes God feels like a last resort after all my other planning has failed.

The truth I need to remember today (and maybe you do, too) is that God is the only one able to save me. He’s the only one strong enough to hold my life together and to hold me when I’m falling to pieces. He’s the only absolute constant that I can count on who won’t ever leave or forsake me.

So all of this to say that I need to be more thankful for what and who I have in my life. I need to remember where it all comes from, too.

I’m thankful most of all that God is still working on me, making me a better man, son, brother, friend, husband (possibly one day), father (also possibly one day), friend, and follower of Jesus.

Just Another Sleepy Sunday

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I have been sleepy all day today. Maybe it’s because it’s been grey and overcast just about the entire day. Maybe because it’s Sunday. Maybe it’s because I didn’t take my customary Sunday afternoon, choosing instead to watch an old movie on TCM.

Regardless, I have a feeling I’ll sleep really good tonight.

I’ve never been more aware of my dire need for God than lately. I need him desperately every hour of every day, every minute of every hour, and every second of every minute. He’s the one who holds me together.

I’ve also never been more aware of the abiding peace of knowing that God is in control of my life. I don’t know what the days and weeks and months ahead hold for me, but I know God knows.

So instead of seeing problems and obstacles, I’m choosing to see blessings. Like the blessings of family and friends, good health, freedom of worship, and life. I hope I never get over the joy of celebrating each and every day as a gift and every person in my life as a blessing that I don’t deserve but I get anyway.

So many will go to bed hungry. So many will end the day alone. So many will have to wake up tomorrow without purpose or meaning or God in their lives.

I need to remember that I’m not blessed so I can grow fat and happy. I’m blessed so that I can in turn be a blessing to someone else who needs it.

So my questions to you are the same ones I’m asking myself. Who are you going to be a blessing to today? Who will you pray for? Who will you encourage? Whose lives will you speak into, whether through a phone call or a text or a facebook post?

If you woke up at all today, you’re blessed. If you had at least one meal today, you’re blessed. If you had shelter from the rain and a car to drive, you’re blessed. If you had family and friends to cheer you up, you’re blessed.

So, how will you pay it forward?

Mr. Irrelevant

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Today, I watched the last few rounds of the NFL draft. I know for some of you that sounds as exciting as watching paint dry or grass grow. But it was an interesting experience, nonetheless.

There’s a new tradition where the last player picked in the draft is deemed Mr. Irrelevant and bestowed with many mock honors in a week-long celebration. I realize that it’s all in fun and not to be taken overly seriously, but it got me thinking.

Have you ever felt irrelevant? Like you don’t matter?

Have you ever been through the process of looking for a job and been to interview after interview, only to be told a variation of, “We’re sorry, but we’ve decided to go with another candidate”?

Have you been at home reading about all the fun exploits everybody else is posting about on facebook and felt uninvited and unwanted?

Did you know that the God of the Universe would have sent Jesus to the cross if you had been the only one who needed saving? Do you realize that God chose you not out of some cosmic sense of obligation, but because he actually and truly wanted you?

I have trouble believing it sometimes, but it’s true. I think Max Lucado said that Jesus would rather go through hell for me than go back to heaven without me. That means that I matter. That means that you matter.

Don’t ever let anybody make you feel like you’re unwanted. Don’t ever let anyone tell you that you don’t matter. You’re wanted and you matter.

I may have already said something like this before, but I don’t care. I’ll keep repeating the same truths over and over until you and I both fully grasp that God is crazy in love with us and desires for us to know him more than anything.

So you see there really are no Mr. Irrelevants after all.

The One Constant

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When I started this little blog roughly 2 1/2 years ago, I had no idea what would happen. I didn’t know if it would blow up or dry up.

It turns out that I have gained a loyal following, not very big by blogging standards, but quite enough for me. Hey, I’m happy if one other person besides me reads my blogs. It really is very therapeutic and I’d still do these even if I were the only one who read them.

Quite a bit has changed since I started this journey. I lost my job, started new medication, gained some new friends, and basically grew up quite a bit. But one thing hasn’t changed. God remains faithful.

In the mist of seemingly daily global chaos, God remains constant. He truly is the same yesterday, today, and forever.

I heard a pastor say that one of the meanings of the word glory is weight. And only Jesus is strong enough to be able to hold all the bits and pieces of your life together to keep you from falling apart. Not relationships, not careers, not healthy living and exercise, not even religious activities.

While all these things are good things, they can’t ever be the only thing. Only God can be that. Only God deserves our utmost affection, attention, and devotion. Anytime we give that to anything or anyone else, that’s idolatry.

It would take too long for me to recount all the times I’ve committed idolatry in my life. Let’s just say I’d have to use more than my fingers and toes to count them all.

But even then, God is faithful. While I go chasing after the next god, he remains constant. He’s still for me and waiting for me to come back. No, better than that. He’s wooing me back in the midst of my infidelity.

So just remember God is the only one worthy of worship. After all, he’s the only one big enough, strong enough, tender enough, and loving enough to get you through.

A Slice of Blogging Life

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Here I am, sitting at a table in the middle of a Connection Cafe at Brentwood Baptist Church that’s full of people and conversations and laughter and . . . well, life. While I was bashing my brains (not literally) trying to come up with a fresh blog topic, I thought, “Why not just describe where I am?” I mean, after all, if this blog fails spectacularly, it’s not like I don’t have 988 others to fall back on. The world won’t end.

I’m in a good position to witness a lot of the interaction going on around me and do what I love to do but don’t normally do unless I’m at the mall: people-watching.

I sometimes like to step outside of life for a bit and observe it. Not in an OCD, note-taking kind of way, but just in a general non-threatening, non-creepy kind of way. I love seeing families and married couples and throngs of teenagers and all the ways they mesh together.

It’s good to slow down and really appreciate this simple things in life. To appreciate family and friends, good health, freedom, the Church with all her beauty and faults, and life. There’s that life stuff again. I guess it boils down to being grateful for being alive. Life isn’t guaranteed. It’s a gift handed to us each day for which most of us– including me– taking for granted most of the time. But not today.

Today I am aware that I could very well not be here tomorrow. Neither could you. No one is guaranteed a tomorrow.

So if you get anything out of this rambling mess of a blog, take this. Take time to appreciate all the miracle and mystery and madness that is life. Take time to be thankful for the gift of being alive and being able to enjoy it.

That’s all. Now you can go back to watching re-runs of Swamp People.

Me Too

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I think that sometimes the most powerful words you can ever say or hear from a friend are, “Me too.”

It means that you’re not alone in your struggle. In your fear. In your doubt.

It means that at least one person knows what you’re going through and you’re not the freakish weirdo out of the whole human race who has your particular issue.

It means that two are more of you are gathered together and that’s where God really shows up.

When I heard a speaker say that he fears when people find out what he’s really like, they will abandon him, I said in my heart, “Me too.” He had named my fear almost verbatim the way I would have named it.

That was comforting. To know that a well-known speaker has the same fear I do was good to know, but that another human being shares that phobia meant the world to me.

So remember you’re not alone in your struggle. You are not a freak of nature. Others are walking the same road that you are, even though you may feel like the only one.

There’s a website called nomorevoices.com where you can name what the voices are telling you. The only response will be, “Me too.”

So remember when you’re in the depth of your struggles that you are not alone. Others are in the same place you are.

And most of all, God knows.

 

A Prayer For All My Friends Who Run

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I may have mentioned this a time or two before, but I’ve gotten back into running. At least before I tweaked my knee. I’m probably the slowest runner ever and would probably get easily passed by power walkers, but I try. I can see how running could easily become an idolatrous obsession. At least for me, anyway. So here’s my prayer for all my friends who run, with the Country Music Marathon in mind.

Lord, I pray for my friends who will be running in the race this coming Saturday.

Give them a beautiful day to run in and may they feel Your pleasure over them as they run, knowing that the ability to run came solely for You. May they run only for Your glory.

Keep them from injuries and accidents and may their feet be swift and their hearts be overflowing and their joy be boundless.

May they be reminded every time they run about the Great Race that we’re all in, following in the footsteps of Jesus, who ran His race perfectly. May they keep their eyes on the Ultimate Prize, which is Jesus Himself.

Regardless of whether they have a chance of winning or not, may they finish well.

May we all run our race, not give up, and finish well.

In Jesus’ name,

Amen.

Questions for the Upcoming Week (Based on Something I Saw on Facebook)

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This week is already upon us and the dreaded Monday is nearly three hours away (if you’re in US Central Standard Time). You’re probably already figuring out all that you have to get done and where you will need to be this week. Which begs a few questions:

1) Are you going to look for the positive in your week or automatically assume the worst about everything and everybody?

2) Will you seek to be a blessing to somebody each day this week?

3) Will you randomly encourage a family member or friend who you know needs it right now?

4) Will you open yourself up for all that God has for you and not be hemmed in by fear?

5) Will you make the first move to reconcile a relationship that you know isn’t what it used to be?

6) Instead of living for Friday, will you live each day like it is a unique gift that will never come again?

7) Will you do a random act of kindness for a stranger who will never be able to repay the favor?

Seven questions for seven days. You can pick one question per day or tackle them all at once or put them all in a hat and randomly draw one out whenever you feel like it. It’s up to you. Just remember this: instead of wanting things to be different in your life, be the difference in someone else’s life and see how your life changes.

 

What I Learned About Grace From Swing Dancing

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I went swing dancing tonight. There was much fear and trepidation at first, and quite honestly, I expected to be a one-and-done and convince myself once and for all that I can not dance.

It started rough. I did well with the lessons part, but once it came to the actual dancing, I panicked and forgot everything. I even was going to use my knee as an excuse not to dance anymore tonight. But a friend convinced me to give it another try. I realized I was stepping too far back at one point and seriously throwing off my rhythm.

Once I got that part corrected, it was like my confidence went through the roof. Or at least to the rafters. I even enjoyed myself.

Then I got to thinking. Swing dancing is more than just doing steps. It takes grace.

Life’s a lot like that. Relationships are a lot like that.

When I have friends who do and say things that I don’t quite understand and seem hurtful, I need to give grace.

When friends seem to withdraw and aren’t as friendly as before, I need to give grace.

When I find myself falling back into old fears and doubts, I need to give myself grace.

Giving grace simply means that there’s more to the story than I know. It means that I would probably do much worse in that other person’s shoes.

So, I plan on going back in two weeks to swing dance again. And I plan to be better at giving grace to those around me, including myself, who need it most.

My question to you is this: who in your life deserves for you to shut them out but who needs grace from you instead? Is it you? Is it a friend who has messed up with you lately? (OK, that’s three questions. I cheated. Sue me)

Grace makes everything more beautiful and is itself beautiful because it is undeserved, unexpected, and always needed.

Once again, I choose grace.

Thoughts About the Boston Bombers

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I know there are some people out there that are celebrating the capture of the two individuals who allegedly set up the bomb devices that killed three and injured so many at the end of the Boston Marathon. I know many people out there want these two to die slowly and painfully so that they feel all the suffering they inflicted on their victims.

But I wonder how many out there will pray for them? I wonder how many out there really believe that Jesus really died for EVERYONE and that God’s love is truly UNCONDITIONAL. Even for terrorists and criminals.

I think so. Just ask the Apostle Paul.

I also wonder what might have happened if either of these two men had seen the love of Jesus lived out before them. If someone had come alongside of them years before and said, “I’m your friend,” not out of a need to convert somebody but out of a genuine love that expects nothing back in return.

I wonder who will mourn the tragic tale of two lives gone horribly wrong and how they got so blinded that they willingly embraced the lies and the hate that could only lead to nothing but destruction and despair.

I am saddened at the lives lost– all of them. I am glad that justice is served, but that doesn’t mean that I rejoice over death. Even God doesn’t rejoice in the death of the wicked (see Ezekiel 18:23 and Ezekiel 33:11).

Faith shouldn’t ever be about us versus them. It should be about us and God. It should be about who we are and who we would have been apart from the grace of God. It should be about seeing the best in people, not the worst, and helping them to see it, too. It should be about holding on to the Love that is stronger than Evil and Death and Hell and believing that this Love ultimately wins out in the end.