spirituality

When Your Brain is all Fuzzy

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I had the flu a few days ago and I am feeling better. I still feel a bit weak and my brain feels a little fuzzy still.

Like tonight, when I stopped to use the gas station restroom. I went to the men’s restroom and found it locked. I went up to the attendant to ask for a key. It never occured to me that the reason the door was locked was that there might be someone in there.

I’m blaming that one on the flu.

Sometimes, you and I have both done and said things that make us slap our foreheads and call ourselves things like idiot or dummy (or other names I won’t print here ). Sometimes, you and I have whole days like that.

The good news is that those moments and those days pass. The good news is that you don’t get zapped into ashes for those fuzzy moments or sent back 3 spaces. You don’t lose $200 or go directly to jail, courtesty of Mr. Moneybags (which for those who have lived in a cave is in a game called Monopoly).

It’s not that I love God so very, very much. It’s that He loves me. It’s not my great big hold on Jesus that will keep me saved, but His very great big everlasting hold on me that will.

Religion is how I can get to God and do enough good things to make me acceptable to Him. Christianity says I can’t, but that He did.

I have a hard time believing sometimes that all I have to do is believe in Jesus and what He did for me, taking my sin and paying for it and satisfying God’s wrath against that sin. How His life and His righteousness are now mine. How I am not an idiot or a dummy or a sinner or an enemy or a stranger anymore.

I’m a child of God, His Beloved.

Every person alive gets the chance to know that grace and forgiveness. It all starts with saying YES to Jesus.

Will you?

Waiting in the In-Between

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In The Magician’s Nephew, a great fantasy book by C.S. Lewis, the main characters find themselves in a “Wood Between the Worlds” kind of place. A place where nothing ever happens, with a warm and calming kind of quietness. A place where you can almost hear the grass growing and branches sprouting leaves.

I’ve felt like that. Like I’m waiting in a place between the now and the not-yet. I feel like time slows down in this place and the waiting seems to take forever and nothing ever really seems to change.

I check my facebook and see everyone else moving past while I’m stuck in the waiting. I see all the parties and social events I didn’t get invited to and I see people’s lives moving at breakneck speed while mine seems to trudge on at a turtle’s pace.

But I believe God’s word for those in the In-Between is simply to wait.

Don’t force the next chapter or the next step. Don’t try to pry open the door into the next part of your life. Being at the right place at the wrong time is still wrong.

We feel like what God wants from us is activity and busy-ness. What God wants from us is dependence and trust. And sometimes rest.

Waiting in the In-Between is not doing nothing. It is getting ready for the next part. It’s becoming the person you need to be to do what God is calling you toward. He’s the one who knows when you’re ready because He’s the one getting you ready.

Instead of a frenetic and feverish impatience to get on to the next big event, try a little deep breathing and deep trusting. Trust that although you may not know the way, you know the One who is leading you and you know that He knows the way and will get you there exactly when you need to be there.

Maybe this time I’ll take my own advice and just learn to enjoy the ride instead of waiting for the destination.

PS You don’t have to wait alone. Part of the blessing of being a part of the Body of Christ is that we not only worship and pray and laugh and weep together. We also wait together.

Hugo: Finding the Key to Life

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“Maybe that’s why a broken machine always makes me a little sad, because it isn’t able to do what it was meant to do… Maybe it’s the same with people. If you lose your purpose… it’s like you’re broken” (A quote from the movie Hugo).

I really liked the movie Hugo. It’s about a boy who lives in a train station and who is extremely adept at fixing things, trying to figure out how to fix one particular machine and retrieve his father’s last message to him. It spoke to me on a deep spiritual level, which is rare for anything that comes out of Hollywood.

If you believe the Bible (and I do), then you’ve read the part where we’re called sinners. All of us. It means we’ve missed the mark. We’ve set aside God’s agenda for our own. We’ve lost our purpose and we’re broken.

We each have a hole we’re trying to fill. Almost like the machine man in the movie Hugo that required a heart-shaped key. We need something (or someone) who can fill the hole and turn our hearts right-side up again.

Only the Creator knows His own creation and how best to fix it. Better yet, the Creator became one of His own creation to be the Key that fills the empty space inside all of us. Only the One who made us can truly name our future and call our purpose out of us.

I know I’m still broken and on some days, it shows. I also know my Creator is fixing me and restoring my identity and my purpose. I love that I get to be a part of Him fixing and restoring the broken lives of other people and helping them find purpose and meaning.

I still believe that no one is too broken for God to fix and there is no one that God can’t redeem and use to do amazing things. Look at me. Look at you. Look at any of the works in progress the Bible calls saints.

It’s not too good to be true. It’s too good not to be true. Believe it.

Strange Songs to Get Stuck in Your Head

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I have songs running through my head all the time. It’s better than listening to the radio. I never know what song will be next or where it will come from or what will inspire it. Like the one that’s in there now. It goes like

“My God is so big, so strong, and so mighty. There’s nothing my God cannot do for you.”

That’s the whole song. It’s deceptively simple and easy enough for toddlers to sing, but profound enough to blow the minds of the most seasoned believers.

There’s so much truth here if you let it sink in. If you dismiss it as a simple children’s song, you miss out on some very deep truths.

God is so big. He’s bigger than you, bigger than your dreams, bigger than what you’re afraid of, bigger than what you’re facing. He’s bigger than what the world says you can’t do or be or overcome. He is so big.

God is so strong. He’s strong enough to reach down to wherever you are, no matter how low, and pull you out. He’s strong enough to break through any barrier or stronghold or even the hell you’re in to find you and rescue you. He is so strong.

God is so mighty. He’s mighty enough to keep you safe and secure from all alarms. He’s mighty enough to finish what He started in you and make you into the person He created you to be. He is so mighty.

There is nothing, absolutely nothing, that God cannot do for you. What’s impossible for you is not even remotely difficult for God (yes, I stole that from a good sermon I heard, but I don’t think he’ll mind).

If you had these words running through your mind all day, imagine how much more confidence and courage you would have. If you believed it enough to step out off the ledge in a leap of faith. If you went to the dangerous and messy places that Jesus went to in order to bring a cup of cold water and a message of hope to the lonely, the broken, the hurting, the outcast, and the thrown-aside.

My God is so big, so strong, and so mighty. He’s stronger than cancer. Stronger than divorce. Stronger than unemployment. Stronger than moral failure. Stronger than addiction. Stronger than the death of a child. Stronger than depression. Stronger than chronic pain. Strong enough to get you through anything and make you stronger on the other side.

There’s nothing my God cannot do. For you.

The YEC: Coming Full Circle

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I got a chance to volunteer over the weekend at the Youth Evangelism Conference at the Nashville Municipal Concert, hosted by the Tennessee Baptist Convention.

It was like coming full circle for me. I was one of the students at the YEC a long, long time ago. This time, I got to see it from the other side. It was an amazing experience.

I saw hundreds of youth walk forward to place their faith in Christ. Not inherited or intellectual faith (as the speaker put it), but real, intimate faith in a real, living Christ. It was one of those moments I hope I never forget any part of. May we see many more such movements of the Holy Spirit on the next generations (and on all generations, for that matter).

I ran into a guy I went to high school with who told me his brother, who graduated with me, had been transformed by the grace of God. Once he had a wild streak and was a partyer. Now he’s a missionary to India getting ready to be in charge of reaching an unreached people group. Only God could do something like that!

I walked aound the Municipal Center, looking at poster-sized replicas of old concert tickets. Apparently in 1978 and 1979, you  could see Bob Dylan and Jackson Browne and other great live acts for $7.50. What I would do for a working time machine.

I probably saw more Christian t-shirts in two days than I’ve seen in the previous year. My favorite one was one that said “This shirt doesn’t have a Christian message,” but on the back it said, “But I do.” That’s how it should be. Our witness should be in our walk and our talk more than in what we wear.

I hope to volunteer again next year and do more. I hope to see God’s Spirit move in power again. I hope that never gets old for me.

Speaking Life

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A bit of a conversation I had earlier today is still ringing in my ears. A well-turned phrase won’t let go of my mind.

We speak into each others’ lives. As believers, we call life out of each other and bring out the best in each other.

I can see in you what you can’t see in yourself. I can speak beauty and faithfulness into your life and you can speak the same into mine.

The best example I know of this is a man who married a woman many considered unattractive and plain.  Over the years, he spoke beauty into her life, telling her she was more lovely and telling everyone he met how beautiful she was. Eventually, she became the beauty he always said she was.

Only God can speak creation out of nothing. Only God in us can speak hope into hopelessness, love into apathy, courage into fear, and life into death.

What are you speaking into the lives of those around you? Who is speaking into your life?

I know many times people saw things in me I couldn’t see in myself and helped me to see myself through God’s eyes.

One of the reasons for this little blog is so I can hopefully speak life and hope and peace and love into your lives and more importantly, help you to hear what God is speaking into your life right now.

May He speak beauty into your ashes, a testimony into your trials, compassion into your pain, and a minstry into your scars. May you ever hear the voice of your Abba singing over you nightly, calling you Beloved.

And may we encourage each other daily and spur each other to love radically, serve sacrificially, and be no less than Jesus to everyone we encounter wherever we go.

Amen.

Who’s the Greatest?

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Who is the greatest in the Kingdom of Heaven? That’s the question that got the disciples all hot and bothered and mad at each other? It’s a question that we ask today, though none of us ever admit it.

Is it the one with the golden voice and the great oratory skills who packs in the crowds with his great speaking ability? No.

Is it the one who can sing like an angel and who can hit notes other mortals only dream about who inspires fervant worship from the masses? No.

Is it the one with all the leadership skills who has read every John Maxwell book ever written? No.

Who is it then?

According to Jesus, the greatest in the Kingdom of Heaven is the one who is like a little child.

Not our westernized romanticized idea of children as sweet and innocent and perfect.

When Jesus said we should be like little children, he meant the children who can’t do anything for themselves and who are dependent on others for everything.

Only when we get humbled like that can we see God do great things in and through us.

Only when we trade in our ruler mentality for a servent mentality. Only when we like Paul see ourselves as the worst of sinners saved by the best of God’s grace.

Only when we become like Jesus, who thought equality with God nothing to be clung to, but Who made Himself nothing. Who became a slave obedient to the point of death. Who died a criminal’s death on a scandalous cross for you and me.

That’s what it means to be the greatest. To lay down your life for your friends and become the slave of all and count others as better than yourself and love till it hurts (and past that point) and take up your cross daily.

It’s the opposite of what sells books and what you see in a lot of leadership positions in churches and Christian organizations.

But it’s the only true way to greatness, according to Jesus.

 

For Those Who Have Doubts: From Kairos Tonight

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I love the question John the Baptist asked. He was in prison for speaking the truth against Herrod and he send his disciples over to Jesus to ask, “Are you the One or should we look for someone else?”

I love that question because that’s somethng I’ve wanted to ask at times but never been brave enough or honest enough to admit it.

I’ve had my doubts. So have you, probably. Jesus is big enough to handle our doubts and answer the questions we have.

His answer to John the Baptist was this, in essence: “Yes, I’m the One. I’ve made lame people walk, blind people see, given poor people hope, and raised dead people to live.”

I think His answer to you and me would be something like this

“For those who have staked their very lives on Me, I prove Myself to be the Supply to your every need, the Comfort to your every pain, the Deliverance in your every trial, and the unquenchable hope in each and every circumstance you have ever or will ever face.

I am the God’s YES and AMEN. I am the fulfillment of every one of His promises. I am the One who holds you together and keeps your hope alive. I am your Hope.

Your doubt doesn’t negate my Sovereignty. Your weakness doesn’t negate my Strength. Your failings don’t negate my ultimate victory.

I am the Ultimate Promise Keeper and my ultimate promise is to complete what I started in you, to make you whole and healed and free, to see you become all I meant for you to be when I made you.

Trust in me when circunstances tell you not to, when common sense tells you not to, when your own senses and feelings tell you not to. They may lie to you, but I never will.

I have set My affections on you and My love for you is stronger than your weakness or doubt. It’s stronger than your fear. It’s stronger than any foe you will face or any obstacle that blocks your way. My love for you is even stronger than death.

I will get you Home.”

 

Voted Off The Island??

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For the record, I have never watched a single episode of Survivor. Not even part of one. That may be what goes on my tombstone. “Here lies Greg Johnson. He never watched even a single episode of Survivor. What was wrong with him?”

I do have days when I feel like I got voted off the island. You know, those days when you post something clever or witty or profound on facebook and the only response you get back is the sound of crickets chirping in the field?

Or the days when you feel like you’re the odd man out in a gathering of people?

I’ve had days when I felt invisible, when it seemed like people looked through me, but never at me, and never saw me. It is true that you can be in a crowd and be alone, because I’ve been there plenty of times.

I keep coming back to the words of Jesus: “I will never leave you or forsake you.” Those words are just as true on the days when you are cracking the jokes that make everyone laugh and on the days when you have trouble forming complete sentences.

The words are true whether you feel them or not. Whether you feel Him or not.

The old footprints in the sand poem is a bit corny, but true. Even when you only saw one set of footprints in the sand, it was not because you were ever truly alone, but because you were being carried.

People are human beings (wow, what a revelation) with human frailties and with problems of their own. They may not see your pain because they are too busy dealing with their own. And everyone I have ever met has secrets and scars and shame. No exceptions.

Remind yourself when you feel alone that you’re not alone, for God is with you.

Oh, and by the way, I prefer Gillian’s Island to Survivor. I like my television as unrealistic as possible. But you would think that if the Professor could make a radio out of a coconut, he could fix a hole in the S.S. Minnow, right?

Epic Phone Fail

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For those of you who are unaware, my Samsung Strive phone has officially given up the ghost. It is no more. It has ceased to be (to borrow from an old Monty Python skit).

I’m reduced to using an old phone with only the numeric keypad. Texting is such a pain and several times I have thought very unbaptist thoughts while trying to text.

That said, if anyone would like to sell (or donate) me phones they aren’t using, that would be great. I will probably end up going the refurbished phone route to tide me over until I can switch to Verizon in July.

If that’s the worst problem I have, I’m doing good. So many others have it way worse than I do. So many others lost their homes and possessions and in some cases, the lives of friends and family members.

I can’t imagine that kind of loss. I can’t begin to empathize with these people. All I can do is pray for them. It sounds like my religious cop-out answer, but it’s the best that I can do.

I’m blessed. Even if I don’t have everything I want, I have everything I need. I may not be where I want to be or think I should be, but I’m exactly where God wants me to be and I’m exactly where God can step in and do amazing things in and around and through me.

I can survive with a lame phone. It may take me 5 minutes to text one simple sentence, but it can be done.

I love the image one pastor used. He said that if God showed him his box of blessings and told him it was empty because he had used up all those blessings, he would say back to God, “I’m good.”

If God never did one more thing for me other than save me from hell and place His stamp of love on me, then I’m good. I’m blessed.

How about you?