I was watching a movie where the main character loved to walk in the rain at night on the streets of Paris. I think I would really like that, too. But that wouldn’t be the best thing.

The best thing to me is this: not that I am all hoorah for God, but that God is for me.

It’s not so much that I am all sold-out on fire (fill in your appropriate spiritual cliche here) in love with God, but that He is totally in love with me.

Truly, I am for God and I love God, but my love is not pure. It’s rife with selfishness and ulterior motives and self-love. Mostly, I am for me and my stuff and my needs.

The part that baffles and amazes me is that God’s love is as pure as God Himself is true. At any given point, His love is just as strong and complete and perfect as it will ever be. His emotion of being in love never wavers or falters like mine does.

But the best part, the most remarkable thing, is the fact that GOD is the one who loves me. You know, the King of the Universe, Creator of everything, Omnipotent, Omnipresent Being. That one. He out of all the people He could have chosen to love for all their beauty or intelligence or talents, chose me.

I still scratch my head sometimes trying to figure out why. I may not ever know why. All I have to do, my job here on earth, is just accept it and pass it on. To be a conduit through which His love passes, a clear vessel filled with the brilliance of the glory of God.

I still think I would like to take a late-night walk in the rain through the streets of Paris one day (preferrably though the older parts). I know that wherever I go, I walk showered in the love of my Abba Father, whose love for me is my life and breath and food and drink and everything else.

That’s pretty freakin’ awesome!

Recently, I heard a sermon based on Judges 2:6-15. Apparently, the nation of Israel as a whole was having a bad hair day. Well, they were pretty much having a bad-all-around day. They had forsaken the Lord and gone after the Baals and Ashtaroths. In only one generation, they had forgotten everything they had been taught about God and His way of living.

The result was a return to slavery and defeat. The last part of verse 16 is telling of their situation apart from God: “And they were in terrible distress.”

It’s easy for me to look down on these Israelites and wonder how they could have been so blind. Then I realize that they didn’t have the completed Revelation of God written down in Scriptures like I do. I also realized the many times I have forgotten God and fallen back into my own version of slavery and defeat to temptation and sin.

It only takes one generation to forget. That’s why it is so very important that we pass our heritage of faith to the next generation. We can’t assume they will automatically believe because we believe. Just as we were shown the way to eternal life, we must also be as deliberate in pointing the way to them.

Fathers, the best way to raise godly children is to live a godly life, to love your wife sacrificially, to cherish the Words of God, and to tell your children who they are and Whose they are.

Mothers, the same goes for you. Life a quiet, godly life, love your husband above all others, and love God above your husband, living out your faith in front of your children daily.

I would admonish you to remember, as a pastor said today, that the best legacy is not what you leave to them, but in them.

As for me, I would do best to remember that I am also prone to forget and to wander. I am bent toward idolatry of any and every kind. I need God and the gospel every minute of every day to remind me of who I am and Whose I am, lest I fall back into slavery and defeat.

Thank you, God, that You are always faithful to remind Your Children who they are and Whose they are. Help us to live like we belong to You and You only. Thank you for the mercy of a fresh start each and every day. Thank you that not slavery and defeat, but freedom and victory have the final word.

You are God and I’m not. That’s really good news. That means I can stop trying to do Your job and let You do it. I can just focus on doing my part. That’s also really good news.

Today, I saw my first Woody Allen movie in a theatre. The movie was Midnight in Paris, about a guy who through some odd loop in time gets to go back to the ’20s and hang out with Ernest Hemingway, F. Scott Fitzgerald, Pablo Picasso, Gertrude Stein, and Cole Porter, among others.

He almost gets to where he prefers the past to the present. If he could only live in that golden age, he would be happier. But this is where Woody Allen the theologian kicks in.

The main character finds out that some living in that ideal time wish they could go back to an earlier time they feel to be a golden age. He learns that given enough time, a so-called golden age loses its luster and has its own set of problems.

I have found myself wishing I could have lived in a earlier era, thinking how much easier it would be. I’m learning that even if I got my wish, I ultimately wouldn’t be satisfied. The grass really isn’t all that greener on the other side. That place or that person or that position you so desperately want won’t be a panacea fix-all to all your problems.

The best cure is to embrace where you are and live there. Love the people you’re with and pray for open eyes to all that God is doing around you.

Ferris Bueller was right. Life is short. If you don’t stop and take time to look around, you could miss it. You could miss the beautiful sunsets and sunrises, rainbows, flowers blooming, changing leaves, and so many small wonders.

Learn to be thankful that you are where you are. If you can name ten things each day that you’re thankful for, pretty soon you’ll have a different outlook.

Thanks, Woody Allen, for that life lesson. Thank you, God, for blessing me and loving me right where I am in the middle of my mess and my confusion. Wherever You are is where I want to be from now on.

I look at most of the people who call themselves Christians (including me) and I immediately have a question. What is this Jesus that we claim to love and serve so much actually worth to us? How much are we willing to sacrifice to follow Him?

For the most part, Christianity is a facebook status. Born again means being politically conservative. Faith for the most part is hypothetical and theoretical, but hardly ever lived out.

If I am all about Jesus on Sunday, but all about me on Monday, what does that say about how much I love Jesus? We may not think so, but the chasm between the way we speak and the way we live speaks volumes and people are listening.

So many times, we look at sin as a line not to cross. We are so obsessed with how close to the line we can get without actually going over. The famous example is always how far a couple can go when dating but not actually have sex. Or how much can we drink without getting drunk and it still be acceptable?

At the same time, we look at Jesus and ask, “What is the minimal effort I need to have a relationship with Jesus? How much do I need to read my Bible to be able to mark that off the checklist and how much do I have to pray for that to count in my favor?”

That outlook betrays where our hearts are. It shows that we love sin more than we love Jesus. If we loved Jesus more, we would see how far we could stay from the line of sin and how much we could do to be more like Jesus and know Him more.

There’s good news in this. God won’t ever abandon or forsake His people, whether their passionately seeking Him or straddling the line of sin. The best answer is this: give up. Quit trying to fix yourself and manage your sin and make yourself better. You can’t. Only God can.

If you see only your own sin and failure, you’ll be tempted to give up. But if you see how good and faithful God has been and keep your eyes on that (and Him), you will be encouraged and strengthened.

But you can’t play both sides anymore. It’s either following what society and culture and the media and the masses say, or following what Jesus says. You can’t follow both.

As for me and my house, I will follow Jesus, only by His help and the support of His people. We do need each other.

 So how much is Jesus worth to me? Maybe not what He should be worth to me, but more than He was to me yesterday. Definitely more than a month ago, or a year ago. And that’s the important part.

As I am writing this, I am well aware of my lack of expertise in this area. For me as a single, never-married person to blog about divorce is like a vegan telling someone the best way to baste a rack of ribs.

I do know this. God hates divorce. Not in the way so many fundamentalist Bible-bashing believers have led you to believe. God hates what it does to you and to your children. No one comes out scot-free. Everyone leaves wounded and scarred.

I’m not going to say that the Bible ever condones divorce. I will say that it is not the unpardonable sin. Not even close.

I think that if you’ve been down this road, you shouldn’t be punished forever for a mistake you made once (or that someone else made that hurt you).

I know that for a marriage to work, there have to be both spouses willing to work for it. You can’t make the other care if he or she doesn’t want to. One person alone can’t save a marriage. But God can. It’s never too late for Him to change or save or redeem anything. Period.

I do think that no one should stay in a marriage where they or their children are in physical or emotional danger. Staying in that case does no one any good. Get out.

I know that God is a God of second, third, and fourth chances. He’s a God of 1,000,000th chances. You never run out when you come to Him seeking Him.

I know I have done and said and thought things that should have gotten me booted for good from God’s good graces. I should be in hell for all my sinfulness. The same goes for anyone who ever lived, if they are honest.

That’s why I am one of the biggest fans you will ever find of grace and forgiveness. No one is ever beyond the reach of God extending either of these to them. Never. At any time.

I know that God is for you, no matter what you’ve done or what’s been done for you. He won’t ever stop rooting for you, cheering for you, singing over you, and loving you wildly. That’s who He is.

I know that when I get married, it won’t be something I enter into lightly. It will be “all in”. and if I can’t be “all in”, then I probably need to stick with my cat. Marriage is a beautiful picture of God’s love for His people and it takes a buttload of work.

I pray you will read these words as one finite fallen man’s thoughts on the subject. I know I still have a lot to learn, but I am more and more convinced that my God is worth everything, every cost and every sacrifice, to know and make known. He’s just that good.

Sometimes, your thoughts are like a child that won’t lie down and go to sleep. You can’t quiet your mind and find rest. That’s me tonight, for some reason.

I don’t normally blog twice in less than 24 hours, but if I don’t, I will be up all night.

Have you ever had friends that you talked to or texted with or facebooked with that, for whatever reason, have stopped talking back?

Do you feel like sometimes that person suddenly decided you weren’t worth the effort anymore?

I have had those feelings, too.

Do you know that God looked down and thought you were worth whatever effort it took to win your heart?

Do you understand that in the times when He’s seemingly gone silent on you and quit responding to you, He’s giving you more than an answer. He’s giving you the precious gift of Himself.

He’s promised never to bail on you. Even when the world turns its back on you, He never will. That’s as good a promise as God is good.

I also have come to realize that those people I used to think had bailed on me or given up on me hadn’t. They just had their own lives to live and problems to solve and fears to face. Like the fear of abandonment.

Sure, some will bail on you. Let them go. The ones worth having are the ones who stick around and refuse to leave when your world comes unraveled. Like Jesus.

And if I am anything like Jesus, I won’t hit the back door when troubles knock on your front door. I won’t duck down the alleyway when storms come down your street. A good friend sticks around, regardless.

Ok, I’m going to try this sleep thing one more time. But I leave you with this: don’t make up your mind about anybody or anything when you’re tired. Trust God enough to leave it in His hands. Then you can sleep like a baby.

I am re-reading Radical a chapter at a time as I facilitate a group study on the book (me and 2 others counts as a group, right?) Again, I find myself convicted by the book at how very much un-radical I am in my faith, to coin a new word. This is not a book review, but more of a review of how the book is impacting me.

I’m thinking of the SS United States, built as a troop carrier, but used as a luxury liner. I think how Platt parallels that to the present American Church (for the most part). How we are called to a battle, but live as though we’re on a cruise.

I’m thinking about all those people who went to dangerous places to take Jesus to people who hadn’t heard His name before. Some suffered. Some even paid with their own lives. One missionary couple was killed and cannibalized, but the next missionaries saw the entire tribe come to faith in Christ.

What will it take for me to stop talking and writing about faith and then going AWOL on that faith so often. What will it take for us to really live Jesus to the world. Not live out a list of what and who we think God hates, or the how breaking these certain rules and secret codes will land you in hell, but real, revolutionary, radical grace and mercy.

But the Jesus who did not think His own life too high a price to pay for His enemies, so that they could have peace with God.

Not a Christianity that says. “God loves you and has a wonderful plan for your life where you get to be the focus,” but one that says, “God loves you and has invited you to join Him in His advancing His own kingdom over all the earth and making His name glorious in every part of the world.”

I want that. Deep down. Underneath all the other things I chase, but once I catch them lose their appeal. I need God to change my heart to beat with His heartbeat.

Again, I ask, “Who is with me? Who wants to stop going to church and playing religion, and start being the Church and showing love and mercy and grace that the world so desparately needs.

I close with something Jesus said. I like the way the Message renders it. I’m not exactly sure where it is located in the gospels, but here it goes:

“Jesus, overhearing, shot back, ‘Who needs a doctor: the healthy or the sick? Go figure out what this Scripture means: ‘I’m after mercy, not religion.’ I’m here to invite outsides, not coddle insiders.'”