religion

The Pretender (Not Just a Great Song by Jackson Browne Anymore)

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Ok, I’m going to ask you a question and I want you to be as honest as possible. Here goes. Have you ever felt like you were pulling the wool over everybodys’ eyes, where they thought you had it all together and you really deep down inside felt like you had no control over anything and no clue whatsoever? Raise your hand if you have.

I know it feels dorky to be sitting alone in front of your computer monitor (or laptop) in the dark with your hand raised, but do it anyway. I just did. I felt really good (and a little bit awkward, too).

You are not alone if you feel like you are fooling everyone.

You are not alone if you feel like you’re pretending to be successful when you feel like you’re failing at every possible turn and messing up everything.

You’re not alone if you walk around with a grown-up exterior, but still feel like a scared little 1o-year old, still afraid of the same things and still believing the same lies you believed back then.

You are not alone if you have a fear deep down inside that someone will see though your saintly Christianity and expose all those sordid and angry thoughts you keep hidden inside.

You won’t be alone because I’ve been there, too. That makes two of us. And I would bet money that there’s more (but I’m Baptist, so I don’t believe in betting real money. Betting Monopoly money is OK in my translation of the Bible, though).

God knows. God sees all the fear and the anger. He sees what’s behind the curtain and what’s beneath the mask. He know your mess better than you do. And the real kicker? He loves you more than you could possibly imagine.

I heard someone say that Jesus didn’t come to accuse or condemn you, but to love you and transform you.

That’s good news. That’s worth being real and honest.

Some Things I Love

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1) I love downtown Franklin, especially at night and even better when it’s not so stinkin’ humid that you can hardly breathe. I love the history and the ambiance of the place.

2) I love when Sweet CeCe’s has red velvet as one of their frozen yogurt flavors. I forgive Sweet CeCe’s for all those times when my hopes were dashed and I had to settle for cable car chocolate or cake batter.

3) I love anything and everything put out by Hillsong. I especially love the fact that I got to see Hillsong United in concert and hear all these songs live.

4) I love that my cat likes to hang around with me and occasionally sleep on me. I feel privileged.

5) I love discovering anything new that broadens my horizons, like new music or books or movies or friends or places or foods. Anything that stretches me, ’cause when you get stretched, you never can go back to your original shape.

6) I love long weekends and vacation days and those days when you get to sleep in to some ungodly hour.

7) I love all things U2 and Coldplay.

8) I love the fact that God’s mercies are new every morning and that His love is unfailing and that He won’t stop wooing my heart until the day I die. And beyond that day.

9) I love the fact that just about every day a song I hear or something I read or a conversation I have will give me one more facet of the beauty and faithfulness of my God. I will get one more thing to be thankful for.

10) I especially love the fact that everything I see on the news that makes me sick to my stomach and breaks my heart will one day be put right. There will be no more hurt or injustice or pain or loss ever again. He will wipe away every tear from our eyes and we won’t be able to see for being bedazzled by the joy we find then.

11) I love most of all that my Abba is very fond of me and that He is also very fond of you, too!

A Letter to Bono

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First of all, I am one of the legions of fans who discovered U2 when the Joshua Tree blew up and sold a gazillion copies in 1987. I should have found about you guys earlier, but I wasn’t nearly as musically savvy as I am now.

I remember listening to that album and having my musical horizons not just broadened, but exploded. This was music that was ahead of its time with songs of politics and faith and love all meshed together in one glorious package. This was my soundtrack for the summer of 1987 and for many years after. In some ways, it still is.

Thank you for not just being another rock star. Thank you for using the platform of fame to fight for the causes that are dear to your heart. Thank you for not being ashamed to be both a man of faith and a man of activism (true faith should automatically lead to activism and good works, but that’s not always the case in this day and age).

I look forward to your albums they way I used to look forward to Christmas. Even the re-released remastered deluxe editions of your old stuff. Even the old songs sound new. Hardly anything sounds dated or like a time capsule to a bygone era. It all sounds fresh and relevant.

I hope you will stand strong in your convictions. I pray you will keep being a voice for those who cannot speak for themselves and a champion for the outcast who cannot defend themselves. I as a believer in Jesus know that one day He will come back and set all things right and bring justice and healing to the nations, but He has called us to be His hands and feet to the hungry and hurting and lonely right here and now.

PS I hope you will come back to Nashville one day in the near future. This time I won’t be a total doofus and I will get my tickets on the day they go on sale.

The Five Stages of Rearview Mirror Installation

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Recently, I had to reattach my rearview mirror after it fell off my window yet again. Trust me. You really haven’t lived until you’ve had to put your rearview mirror back on your windshield.

It was going so well. I got my kit, prepped the window, glued the metal part, and tried to attach the mirror. It wouldn’t go. Then I asked myself the dreaded question: “Did I actually put the metal part on backwards?” It involved a five step process that you might or might not recognize.

1) Denial: “No, this is the way it goes. It can’t have gone the other way. This stupid rearview mirror is just being a pain. If I keep at it, it will eventually lock into place and all will be right with the world again.”

2) Anger: “Stupid, stupid mirror. Why can’t you just fit and not give me a hassle? Why does this have to be so complicated?”

3) Bargaining: “God, if you just let this work, I’ll always let other cars pull out in front of me. I’ll never say another unkind word about the driver who cuts me off ever again.”

4) Depression: “Well, I suppose life isn’t that bad driving a car with no rearview mirror. At least I still have both side mirrors, right?”

5) Acceptance: “Ok, I’m done pouting. I’ll drive the two miles and pay the extra $5 for another kit and start the process over.”

That’s kinda how it went. Why, you ask, should I alone have the privilege of having to reattach my rearview mirror multuple times? Just lucky (or blessed, if you’re Baptist).

Life is back to normal. I can back up and change lanes without throwing up a Hail Mary. My car looks normal again.

Most things in life are like that. Just because something’s not easy doesn’t mean it’s not possible. And screwing up the first try doesn’t mean the end of civilization as we know it. Sometimes you just need a second chance.

That’s all.

Worship

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Tonight at Kairos the subject was worship. I am a fan of worship, but I think I tend to make it too much of an event and not enough of a lifestyle. Worship isn’t just singing or great music. That’s part of it, but there’s so much more to it.

The takeaway from tonight that really blew my mind is  this: everything is worship. Every single thing I do and say is me worshipping, whether that be God or something else. Everything. John Calvin said that the heart is an idol factory, always offering up a god for me to worship other than the one true God.

How well I live out my worship doesn’t just affect me. There are many people watching my worship, determining their view of Jesus by what they see of me. I may be the only Jesus some ever see, the only Bible some will ever read. That should give me pause.

God is the only true object worthy of worship. Even if God only saved me and never did one thing more for me, I would still owe Him an eternity’s worth of worship.

Will you make worship an event or a lifestyle? Will you make it a one day, one hour a week thing or a 24/7 everyday kind of thing?

God, make us true worshippers of You who will truly worship you in spirit and in truth by everything we say and everything we do. May our worship be a witness of just how good You are.

Amen.

The Simple Life (and the Simpler Arcade Game)

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When I was in Ohio for my friend’s wedding, we had our wedding rehearsal dinner at Dave & Busters’. An excellent choice, but I digress. The point is that I finally found an arcade game that I’m good at (unless you count skeeball). The game is called Gone Fishing.

The premise is simple. A polar bear stands with a wooden club over a hole in the ice where fish periodically jump out of the water. The point of the game is to whack the fish with the club at just the right angle to send the poor cod flying. The further he goes, the more points you get. Genius.

I can handle that. It’s simple. And I like simple.

I think life should be more that way. We make our lives too complicated and too cluttered. We end up doing a lot of things marginally well instead of a few things exceptionally. We end up feeling like Bilbo Baggins, who described himself as feeling like butter scraped over too much bread, thin and worn out.

Jesus said that the whole law could be summed up in loving God with all your heart, mind, soul, and strength, and loving your neighbor as yourself. Life in a nutshell is loving God and loving others. That’s it.

Sometimes, life gets complicated when we don’t have a purpose. Or when we have several conflicting and confusing goals instead of just one.

Christianity gets overly complicated, too. I really like how Henri Nouwen simplified the faith. When asked to describe the faith in one sentence, he said, “You are the beloved of God.” That’s it. The whole story is about how God became one of us and died in our place because He loved us too much to leave us in the mess we were in.

I tried playing Call of Duty: Black Ops, but ended up being cannon fodder (or in this case, machine gun fodder). I was really bad. I think I’ll stick to much simpler games like Gone Fishing.

I think I am just one more person to find out that the simple life really is the good life. Getting there may be hard, but I think it’s worth it.

 

You are the Beloved (A Henri Nouwen Quote)

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I had to post this because it spoke so powerfully to me just now. Here it is in its entirety from Henri Nouwen.

“Over the years, I have come to realize that the greatest trap in our life is not success, popularity, or power, but self-rejection. Success, popularity, and power can indeed present a great temptation, but their seductive quality often comes from the way they are part of the much larger temptation to self-rejection. When we have come to believe in the voices that call us worthless and unlovable, then success, popularity, and power are easily perceived as attractive solutions. The real trap, however, is self-rejection. As soon as someone accuses me or criticizes me, as soon as I am rejected, left alone, or abandoned, I find myself thinking, “Well, that proves once again that I am a nobody.” … [My dark side says,] I am no good… I deserve to be pushed aside, forgotten, rejected, and abandoned. Self-rejection is the greatest enemy of the spiritual life because it contradicts the sacred voice that calls us the “Beloved.” Being the Beloved constitutes the core truth of our existence.”

Meditate on that for a while and see if that doesn’t change the way you see yourself.

Known for your YES

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I passed a church parking lot today and the first thing that caught my eye was the NO in No Parking. I know what they meant, but I also know that too many tims the American church is too often known for it’s NOs.

We make a big deal about what we’re against. I heard a pastor say that when he was growing up, his old church would get together on Sunday to talk about all the things they didn’t do. As if that automatically made for spiritual maturity.

I think if we’re in line with Jesus, we should be know for our YES. Not just giving up the bad stuff (although what we’re against isn’t necessarily bad, but just what goes against our cultual upbringing and preferences). We should be known for what we are for.

I am for Jesus. I am for His grace and mercy. I am for seeking to look a little more like Him daily. I am for trying to please Him in all I do.

Focusing on the negatives only makes a person bitter and resentful. No one is attracted to a faith where all the talk is about denial. What atracts people is that by giving up these things, we are gaining a thousand times more. We get Jesus.

We get each other, too. We get to walk through life together and carry each other’s burdens. We get to encourage each other and push each other to be more like Jesus. To me, that’s way better than anything I’m giving up.

C.S. Lewis said, “Aim at Heaven and you will get Earth thrown in. Aim at Earth and you get neither.” I think that if you’re only about sin-avoidance, you miss out on the point. If you’re about seeking and falling in love with Jesus, you end up avoiding the sin and getting a whole lot more in the bargain.

That’s what I think. I want to be known for my YES. I hope you do, too.

Awkward Moments

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I’ve lived long enough to have my share of awkward moments, as any of you probably have. I think you really haven’t passed the initation into true adulthood until you’ve had at least one really awkward moment of your own doing.

I remember one from when I was a kid. I remember my sister used to take ballet and I would wait outside. This one time, I decided to race her to the car. So when I saw her I took off running and got to the car and sat down. Then I looked around. I thought, “Hey, this isn’t our car. This isn’t my sister.” I had raced someone I didn’t even know and gotten into a strange car. I think that qualifies as a shared awkward moment for both me and for them.

There was also my storied tap dancing career which lasted all of one awkward dance recital. The legacy of Fred Astaire is safe for now, at least for me.

I think the key to those awkward moments is to learn to laugh at yourself and to realize that those are not your defining moments. Life goes on after awkward moments. It really does. Trust me on that.

And I think grace isn’t just for the really bad and really stupid stuff. It’s for awkward stuff that you wish you could take back the moment it happens. Grace isn’t just for the other person. Sometimes you need to extend grace to yourself, too.

Let’s just say that  the extent of my dancing is watching old Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers movies. I tried the ballroom dancing thing, but my problem was I never knew which of my two left feet to lead off with. One day, I will trying again and pray for the miracle of grace and better coordination.

So, hooray for the awkward moments. They keep us humble and remind us of how much we still need God and each other. And thankful for grace.

 

Little Victories

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Today, I had one of those little victories. Kinda like the 7.5 ounce cans of Dr. Pepper. All the sugary goodness, only in a smaller container. That’s how I look at little victories.

It wasn’t a eureka moment. It was just a moment when I realized that a couple of years ago I would have been panicked or angry or severely discouraged and I wasn’t any of these things. I had a bad moment at work where I found out I did something wrong and I didn’t freak out.

I did some slow breathing and short prayers and realized that the world wasn’t going to end. Score Greg 1, Panic 0. A small victory.

It may not seem like anything, but to me it’s something. Most people prefer the epic Braveheart-style victories, but the smaller ones are more likely to happen in real life. Usually, the battle isn’t won in a sweeping triumph all at once, but in a series of small victories. Like today.

You may find yourself reacting for once out of understanding and not anger. You might find forgiveness in your heart for someone who wronged you. You may say no to the cheesecake and yes to the salad. Those are small victories.

Small victories are a reminders of the ultimate victory yet to come. They are a reminder that God is in the details as well as in the grand scheme. You see in that moment that God was with you all along, even when it seemed that you fought alone.

I am a fan of small victories. I am also a fan of those small cans of Dr. Pepper and especially the tiny servings of Ben and Jerrys that come with the tiny spoons. I guess I need to work on that salad thing.

Don’t discount the small things. God shows up in the little victories and most often sends blessings in the form of little moments of joy and small graces. Most of all, His preferred manner of speaking is a still, small voice.

I guess good things do come in small packages.