peace

A Vacation From My Problems

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I’ve come up with a revolutionary new way to take a vacation. It goes like this:

1) You don’t show up for work. If you’re working, it’s not a vacation.

2) You stay home. You don’t spend insane amounts of money on plane tickets or gas or hotel rooms or any of that rubbish. You stay home, sleep late, go wherever you want, whenever you want.

I’m thinking of calling it a stay-cation. Catchy, eh? It’ll be the next big catch-phrase that all the hip young kids will be dropping in their sentences from now on.

The best kind of vacations are the free ones anyway.

The best kind of vacations are the ones where you get a break from everything that wears you out and holds you down. Like fear or doubt or worry. Like concerns about the future or haunting memories of the past.

I have a fantastic vacation package deal for you.

Tomorrow is the start of your vacation. Whatever is in your past is past. Whatever fears controlled you yesterday can’t touch you today. Whatever doubts you had are losing their hold on you.

Jesus promised that for those who believed that perfect love would cast out fear. He promised that to those who love Him He would work everything out for the good. He promised that every morning His mercies are new and His faithfulness is still great.

Your vacation is a clean slate. It’s freedom from the burden of trying to undo all you did wrong yesterday. It’s liberty to live today with no baggage.

Your vacation is a chance to be whatever Jesus wants to you be, to go wherever He leads, and to serve Him in the faces of every one you meet. It’s an opportunity to be blessed in giving yourself away, to find that you are now a conduit of blessing to others.

Your vacation starts at 12:01 am.

P.S. You still have consequences from past decisions and troubles to come, but you’re not held captive to them anymore. You’re free to face them as a blood-bought redeemed child of the King. You’re free in the knowledge that ultimate victory is yours. Just thought I’d add that in there for clarification.

As always, thanks for your  comments, especially the ones that point out to me my blind spots. It’s always good to get a new and fresh perspective on things every now and then.

Turning the big 4-Uh-Oh

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In less than six days, I turn 40.

Yes, I’ve heard that 40 is the new 30, and 20 is the new 10. I guess that makes 10 the new embryo.

I’m gonna be 40. Right now, I think I’m in denial. I’ve been telling everyone I am celebrating the 15th anniversary of my 25th birthday, which is true and sounds less ominous that the dreaded “turning 40.”

Am I where I thought I would be at 40? Not even close.

I’m not married. Or engaged. Or dating. Or even remotely close to dating (I’ve always heard that for dating to work you need to not only be attracted to someone, but that someone should also be attraced back. Funny how that always seems to be the case.)

Sometimes, if I let myself think about how far off-course I am from where I envisioned myself, it’s enough to make me uber-bummed.

But as I was reminded this week, God’s ways are not my ways and His thoughts are not my thoughts. As far as the heavens are above the earth, so His thoughts are that much higher than mine.

I see only a tiny part of the picture while He sees the whole thing. He knows where I need to be and He knows how to get me there when I am good and ready, and not one second before then.

Daily, it’s a fight to seek first the Kingdom of God and not my own itinerary. It’s hard to keep trusting in God when He leads me contrary to where everything in me tells me I should go.

Still, I know that even though I don’t know the way or how I will get there, I can trust the One leading me. I can look back at His proven track record and know that He’s got me.

I’m in Good Hands.

A Letter to Kim Kardashian

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Kim,

I don’t know if you will read this or not. Realistically speaking, I’m pretty sure you won’t, since you probably don’t have time to read blogs by people you don’t know who aren’t famous. But if by some extremely remote chance, you happen to stumble on this quaint little blog, I hope you know I’m rooting for you.

I know a lot of people will look at your decision to start a Bible study and question your motives. They will say you just want to hook up with Tim Tebow or give some other reason why you can’t legitimately want to read God’s Word for its own sake.

I am not one of those.

I hope you read the Bible and find all that God has for you in there. I hope you find God’s love letter to His people, including you, and how much He loved His people and what great lengths He undertook to win back His people lost to sin and death.

I hope you will find that true beauty is in what God says about you, not what some magazine or television producer says about you. God says, “I made you and that makes you beautiful, because I made you in My image.”

I hope you will know that Jesus loves you just for you, not because of what you do or what you wear or who you know. I hope you can find joy in the fact that Jesus looked at you in your worst moments and thought you were still to die for.

I hope you fall in love with God’s Word and want it more than anything else. I hope you are transformed by what you read and that every time you read the Bible, you put it down a different person than when you picked it up. More than that, I pray you will take what you read and live it out in compassion for the needy and love for those whom God loves.

I hope you understand that no matter what you’ve done in the past, God has a purpose for you. He can work in and through you to do some pretty amazing things that will blow you away.

Like I said before, I’m rooting for you and hoping you find the peace you’re looking for.

Signed,

A Ragamuffin who is just trying to tell others about the grace of God that he’s found

PS It’s still not too late, no matter how messed up your life seems right now. Jesus can still turn your mess into something beautiful.

What Maturity in the Faith Looks Like

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I had some random thoughts on the concept of maturity as a believer and what that should look like. Not that I’m so very mature or perfect, but I’m beginning to catch glimpses of what the finished product will look like.

It means that I am finally comfortable in my own skin. I’m not wishing I were taller or shorter or better looking or 5 to 10 pounds lighter. It means I look in the mirror and really like the person looking back.

It means I am at peace with the silence and don’t need constant noises to distract me from my own inner monologue. It means I can be alone and not always have to be in a crowd or with people all the time.

It means that I am finding my completeness in Christ and not looking for something or someone to validate my existence or give my life meaning. I am not defined by a relationship or the lack thereof, by my income level, my living situation, or anything else but by what God has told me and who He has said I am.

It means there is not a person out there that I can’t learn something from. It also means that I never reach the point where I will finally have all the answers and have God figured out neatly into a tidy doctrinal box.

It means that I am strong enough to be weak, and more than that, to boast in my weaknesses, so that the power that raised Christ from the dead, that resurrection power, can work best in me.

It means I have learned that some of the most important words are “I’m sorry. I was wrong. Forgive me” and “I will choose to forgive you.” When speaking to God, the two most important phrases are “Help me” and “Thank you.”

It means that you look for the best in others and always give the benefit of the doubt and never, never, never, never give up believing in or praying for those in your life who are trying to do right.

It means that I can love as God loves, giving without expecting anything back. It means that I become a vessel always being filled with the love of Jesus and always running over and always overflowing on to those around me, so that God is truly loving those people through me.

Finally, it means that I am already who God said I would be. I am perfect and holy and righteous because He declared it to be so.

Ok, I lied. One more. It means that no matter how hopeless or bad or forlorn my situation looks like, I can know that it will turn out for the best, because God will finish what He started in me. One day, sooner than later, it will all have been worth it and there will not have been any part of my story that God didn’t turn into something beautiful.

 

More Random Things I’m Thankful For

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I mentioned some of the things I’m thankful for a couple of blogs back and I decided to add these to the list:

1. Getting to sleep in on certain Saturdays. It’s nice to be able to look at 5:30 am on the alarm clock and roll over and go back to sleep.

2. Good stories that make me lose track of time, whether they be in books or movies or TV shows.

3. That who I am is who God tells me I am, not who I or anyone else tells me I am. Not what I’ve done. Not my mistakes or failures or even my good deeds. I am God’s beloved.

4. That this is not one of those essays that has to be 500 words or else I get counted off on my grade.

5. The peace that transcends all understanding and comes when I least expect it and need it most.

6. Grace.

7. That I know so many awesome people who have inspired me and challenged me and loved me and made me want to be more like Jesus.

8. That the best things in life are still free.

9. That when I press “publish” some little men inside my computer box will make this go out over that great and mysterious internet to people I may never meet but who may be inspired to find something of their own to be thankful for and find the God from whom all these blessings flow.

Seeking

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“What I’m trying to do here is get you to relax, not be so preoccupied with getting so you can respond to God’s giving. People who don’t know God and the way he works fuss over these things, but you know both God and how he works. Steep yourself in God-reality, God-initiative, God-provisions. You’ll find all your everyday human concerns will be met. Don’t be afraid of missing out. You’re my dearest friends! The Father wants to give you the very kingdom itself” (Luke 12:29-32).

In this passage, Jesus is telling His disciples to seek the Kingdom rather than after food and clothing and other needs and wants that tend to crowd our lives. I heard a really good sermon today about what seeking in that context looks like.

To seek after something is to set your heart on it and make it the most important thing in your life. When you seek after things, whether they be possessions or money or relationships or any other material things, then you tune your hearts to worry.

Are you setting your heart on a relationship or the possibility of a relationship?

Are you setting your heart on money or how to get more money?

Are you setting your heart on gaining influence and privilege and power? On making a name for yourself? On knowing and being seen by the right people?

There are so many things that can be good things that can lead to worry and frustration if they become the main thing. A good thing that you make the most important thing is an idol if that is anything other than seeking after God and His kingdom.

If you seek the Kingdom of God, His complete rule over your life and all that He is and does for you, then you will find that He takes care of the very things you were worried about before. You will find all your needs have been met without you  having to scramble all around after them.

You can tell what you’re seeking by what and where your treasures are. You can tell what you treasure most by two things: your checkbook and your day planner. If you’re like me, you just got very convicted at the thought without even having to look. You know what and where your treausures have been, and they have been anything but heavenly.

But tomorrow is a good day to start over and start seeking the right things, like God and His kingdom. Or better yet, today is an even better place to start. Like I’ve said before, it’s never too late to turn around and start over and be who God made you to be. Never.

Takeaways from Kairos Tonight

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I feel like I blew it the last few days. I said and texted and posted some stuff that I now wish I could take back. In fact, there are whole sections of the last day or two that I wish I could have a do-over on. Today, I let fear and worry take over and I listened to them instead of the voice of the One who calls me Beloved and says good things about me.

In Kairos, I was reminded that the Gospel is about God’s YES rather than God’s NO. While the world and those around you may be telling you all the things you are not: not skinny enough, not pretty enough, not rich enough, not talented enough, etc. Sometimes, even you feel that you don’t measure up or have what it takes.

The Gospel doesn’t start with how bad off you are. The Gospel isn’t about how much of a sinner you are and how wide you’re going to bust hell open. The Gospel starts, “For God so loved the world.” For God so loved YOU that He gave His only, unique, one-of-a-kind, never-to-be-another Son, so that if YOU believe in Him, YOU will not perish but YOU will have eternal life.

On those days when what you want to say sounds right in your head but comes out totally wrong out of your mouth or through your text, God loves you. When you completely give in to the anger and frustration and completely lose your religion, God still loves you. When you forget who you are in Christ and start trying to find someone or something to define you and make you complete, God still loves you. And He always will.

Brennan Manning said, “Tragedy is that our attention centers on what people are not, rather than on what they are and who they might become.” God sees not what we are not and all we lack, but who we are, His sons and daughters whom He loves and died for. He sees who we will be and He reminds of our future selves who are fully complete and mature and just like Jesus. That’s what we’re becoming.

All that from a sermon I heard tonight at Kairos. I’d say I needed to hear it. I hope you did, too. If nothing else, remember what I always say: Your Abba is very fond of you and is not even close to giving up on you, even if others are or even if you are. That’s the truth. Live out of that.

 

To Be Known and To Know

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I had a dream when I was in grade school where I walked into the wrong classroom on my first day of school and everyone stared at me like I had three eyes and antennas growing out of my head. It was not a good dream. I was very glad to wake up from that one.

I also remember in the past longing with everything in me for someone who would really know me and still want to be my friend. I’ve had a lot of surface friendships, but very few with people who really, really knew me.

I think just about everyone deep down wants to be known.

I think everyone wants someone who knows them for who they really are, with flaws and insecurities and fears, and still chooses to stick around.

I believe that everyone wants to be able to be themselves around someone, to be free to say dumb and awkward stuff occasionally and not be ostracized for it.

I feel that all of us want to be able to take the mask off, to not have to always respond to “How are you doing?” with “Oh, I’m fine,” but to really give the honest answer along the lines of, “I’m not doing so well today . . . .”

We long for someone who will see our brokenness and not shun us, who will see our weaknesseses and not treat us like lepers. Someone who will walk alongside us during the hard days and the tough times and will gently guide us back onto the path when we’ve strayed.

Jesus is the friend who sticks closer than a brother. He’s the one who knows our innermost being, including the deepest, darkest secrets we keep and the places we hide that no one else knows about.

I really and truly believe that to be known in that way requires two things. First, that we seek to know others in the same way and second, that we are brave enough to be that open and honest and transparent to let people inside.

My prayer is that you can be truly known for all of who you are and loved, first by knowing the God who made you and knows you better than you know yourself and loves you completely and perfectly, and then by people God will bring into your life who will inspire you and touch you and leave their footprints permanently etched in your heart.

The One Jesus Loved Dearly

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I’m in the middle of reading through the Gospel of John. That probably would earn me bonus points until I point out the fact that I am reading out of The Message version. So much for the bonus points. FYI Just kidding about the whole bonus points thing. You only get bonus points if you can read out of the original Greek.

In John 13, John refers to himself as “the disciple Jesus loved.” I really like how the Message renders it– “the one Jesus loved dearly.” That got me thinking. How do I see myself most of the time and how do you see yourself most of the time?

As the one who can’t go through a single day without making a stupid mistake?

As the one who opens his or her mouth and inserts his or her foot repeatedly?

As the one who runs friends off and who always hears about great parties but is never invited to any?

As the one who has already blown your 2012 resolutions to smithereens?

As the one who couldn’t save the marriage or stay clean or hold back the words spoken in anger that drove someone away or keep the vows you made?

I could go on and on and on. The list is endless. I’m sure you could add many to the list.

John the Apostle could have probably added his own list of names– such as the one who lost his temper a lot, or the one who wanted Jesus to smite those Samaritans, or the one who deserted Jesus in his hour of greatest need.

Yet the one John chooses to call himself, the one he refers to himself as, is the one Jesus loved dearly.

That’s you. Once Jesus found you and saved you, you were no longer owned by any of the names you gave yourself or the names your father or mother or anyone else gave you. Your identity was changed forever to the Beloved, the one Jesus loves dearly.

It’s good to remind yourself of this fact when you have screwed up for the 55th time and it’s not even lunchtime. It’s good to remember this when you have spoken words that you immediately wish you could pull back and say differently. No matter what you’ve done, these words are still true and nothing you do will change that.

You are and will always be the one Jesus loves dearly.

More Thoughts on 2012

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Ok. We’re 2 days into 2012, so it’s time for a little self-evaluation.

Are you keeping those resolutions or have you already given up on half of them and said something to the effect of “Just wait until 2013. That’s gonna be a banner year for my resolutions”?

Are you doing better at being patient and slow to anger? Are you exhibiting more grace toward those who aren’t as easy to get along with? Are you handling adversity and trials and most of all, those little annoying things that seem to get under your skin?

I think I lasted about 30 minutes into my first day back at work before I was ready to go back to bed. It was that kind of day. So I thought I would pass along a few reminders that you may or may not need at this point, but that I definitely do.

1) If all you can say is that you’re still here, then that qualifies as a success. No matter what got thrown your way, you survived, and that’s something to celebrate, even if it’s the only thing.

2) God is still the same God who promised never to leave you or forsake you. The same God who promised to complete the good work He started in you.

3) There’s nothing you will face that He can’t overcome in and through you. No matter how big the obstacle, God is bigger. No matter how strong the foe, God is stronger. No matter how hard the journey or the process, God is up to it.

4) Tomorrow everything starts over. The score will be 0-0 and your slate will be clean. No matter how badly you messed up or how big a fiasco you made, you still get new mercy and fresh grace and unlimited steadfast love, courtesy of your Heavenly Father.

5) Nothing seems as hopeless after you’ve had a good night’s sleep. Or even a decent night’s sleep.

If you need to, you can read this again tomorrow night. And the night after that. Even if you don’t, do remember the promises of God are always for you and always as sure as the God who made them. Just remember that and you’ll be fine.