mercy

God is Strong

/ Ragamuffingospelfan / 2 Comments

“Because of the extravagance of those revelations, and so I wouldn’t get a big head, I was given the gift of a handicap to keep me in constant touch with my limitations. Satan’s angel did his best to get me down; what he in fact did was push me to my knees. No danger then of walking around high and mighty! At first I didn’t think of it as a gift, and begged God to remove it. Three times I did tha…(tharr be more)t, and then he told me, My grace is enough; it’s all you need. My strength comes into its own in your weakness. Once I heard that, I was glad to let it happen. I quit focusing on the handicap and began appreciating the gift. It was a case of Christ’s strength moving in on my weakness. Now I take limitations in stride, and with good cheer, these limitations that cut me down to size—abuse, accidents, opposition, bad breaks. I just let Christ take over! And so the weaker I get, the stronger I become” (2 Corinthians 12:7-10, The Message).

When I am weak, then God is strong.

When I have come to the end of all my willpower and promises to stop this one bad habit and I say, “God, I can’t, but you can,” then God is strong.

When I see my weakness as an opportunity for God to come through big time, then God is strong.

When I see everytime someone abused me or made fun of me or ostracized me as a way for God to make me who I am today, then God is strong.

When I can boast in the fact that I am helpless and weak apart from Christ but in Christ I can do all things, then God is strong.

When I look at a track record of fear and failure and still believe that the next morning is a new day with new mercies, then God is strong.

When people see my life and say not, “How great Greg is,” but “How good God is,” Then God is strong.

When all I can pray is “God, help me” and nothing else, when even words fail and all I have are tears and sighs that cry out to God, then God is strong.

When those same people look at me and think that if God could use someone like me then God could use them, then God is strong.

When I see over and over where God picks nobodies and outcasts and throwaways to change the world (think of the 12 who turned the 1st- century world upside down) and see myself as one of those, then God is strong.

When my song though endless ages isn’t, “I did it my way,” but “Jesus led me all the way,” then God is strong.

There are two things I know (and that I heard in a song) that God loves me and He is strong. So tonight I am clinging to that Strong Love with everything that’s in me.

God is strong.

It’s Who You Know

/ Ragamuffingospelfan / 3 Comments

I’ve always thought it would be awesome to hang out with a celebrity. Maybe have a deep conversation with Bono or have tea with C.S. Lewis (this is my fantasy, so I make the rules and I can talk to famous dead people if I want to).

Since I moved to Nashville, I have had a few celebrity sightings. Heck, I even held the door open for Keith Urban and Nicole Kidman when they were walking out of Borders one time. She even said, “Thank you.” I think I spent the next 30 minutes walking around in a daze.

That’s good and all, but how about this? Who could I possibly meet or know that could ever be more important than the King of the Universe? Who could I ever talk to that would be higher up than the Creator of everything?

The beautiful part of the story is not that I know Him, but that He knows me. He knows my name. He knows absolutely everything I’ve ever done, good and bad. He knows the secret thoughts I keep that no one else knows about. He knows how many hairs are on my head.

Better still, He wants me. He wants me to talk with Him and to tell Him everything. He looked down and saw scrawny little me, destined to be the last one picked for kickball, and chose me. Not because He had to, but because He wanted to. He wanted me.

He loves me. He’s in love with me. He’s crazy for me. This God who has everything gave up everything to win my heart. The Great Romance of the ages is how God Almighty has wooed and won my affections.

He wants you, too. He sees you in your brokenness and bad choices and bitter thoughts and wants you. He knows those things you’ve done that you would give anything to undo and He wants you. He sees into the deepest, darkest part of your heart where you keep your secrets and lies and He wants you.

Christianity is not about avoiding bad sins. It’s not about not drinking or cussing or sleeping around. It’s not even about being moral and having godly habits. Christianity is simply that when you and I could not get to God, God came to us. Not to condemn us, but to change us by the most powerful element in the universe– love. It’s that God wants us to know Him.

The next time you’re tempted to fantasize about meeting celebrities, remember this. You can know the Greatest Person who ever lived. His name is Jesus and He loves you. Yes, as I’ve said many times before, your Abba is indeed very, very fond of you.

Reminders for The Storm

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Sometimes you’re in a good place in life and everything goes right and people all like you and all your traffic lights are green at just the right time. Be thankful.

Sometimes you’re not in such a good place. Those old self-doubts creep back in and people you thought were friends are suddenly nowhere to be found. Nothing goes right and it takes all you have to make it out of bed in the morning. Remember these things.

1) God has not forgotten you. It may seem like it. It may feel like it. Everything you see may seem to indicate it. But God’s promise to never leave or forsake you is more real than what you feel or what you think. It’s as good as done.

2) God knows where you are and what you’re going through. He sees the other side of the pain when you can’t and He is with you when it seems no one else is.

3) God’s arms are still long enough to reach down to where you are and strong enough to carry you through. He’s for you in this. Don’t forget that.

4) Everything you go through will  make you stronger and will enable you to help those who are going through the same storms. Your pain becomes your ministry and you will be able to speak into people’s lives in a way that someone who has led a storm-free life never could.

5) Don’t think that just because your storm isn’t catastrophic and earth-shattering, it doesn’t matter. God uses the small inconveniences and the wearying days just as much to shape and mold you into His image.

6) Above all, remember that God’s goal is not your happiness, but your holiness. It’s not comfort and ease, but Christlikeness that He wants for you.

7) Know that you are not alone. You have people who will walk beside you through your storm.

8) As hard as it seems, if you keep a thankful spirit and a worshipful attitude, your storm won’t seem so bad. There’s always something to be thankful for. Always.

I hope this helped someone. I know for me personally, I had to remember that each new morning is a new start. I have to remind myself that all storms come to an end. God’s love will outlast any storm and He won’t ever quit on you. Ever.

 

 

Neediness is Good

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I as a recovering codependent can tell you that neediness is not a bad thing. In fact, it can be a very librerating and good thing. It all depends on where you take your needs to.

Other people can’t meet my needs all the time. Maybe some can meet some of my needs some of the time, but never all the time. Only God can meet every need every time.

So God, I’ve made a list of all that I need from You, because You said that if I lack I should ask from You.

1) Wisdom – life is hard and complicated and weird sometimes and I can’t navigate my way through all its unpredicable twists and turns without constant dependence on God for each step.

2) Relationships- I need so much help from You so I won’t say the wrong thing or put my foot in my mouth or generally be goofy and awkward. I can see how far You’ve brought me, but I know I still need You to speak through me and love people through me.

3) Witness- I can’t say enough how much I need You to shine through me every day so that people see You in me. I confess that if anybody has seen anything good in me ever, it has been You and only You.

4) Blogs- I can tell when a blog is from me and when God is in it. My blogs tend to be random and pointless. The blogs You give me always seem to speak to a need and help begin the healing process. I am still amazed that anything I write can do anything for anybody, but when You’re in it, it does.

I need God. I need my brothers and sisters in Christ to hold up my arms when I can’t. I need so much, but I am finding out every day that God is more than enough. Chris Tomlin, I think you should write a song about that. It would probably do well on the radio and get sung a lot in churches. Just sayin’.

Oh, and thank you for still reading these blogs. It means the world to me.

Still Amazed

/ Ragamuffingospelfan / 1 Comment

I had a good conversation with a friend of mine at Starbucks recently. During the conversation, I had two thoughts.

1) I’m amazed that the person I’m talking to wants to have a conversation with me. I’m even more astonished that this person wants to be my friend. After overcoming a lifetime of low self-esteem and codependency, it’s still hard to grasp that I was who God was talking about when He looked at what He created and said, “It is very good.”

I have an even harder time believing that God wants anything to do with me, much less wanting to use me in any way. It blows my mind that He can take my meager offerings, like the two fishes and five loaves of bread, and use them to bless so many (usually in ways that I am completely unaware of at the time).

I’m astonished and amazed and grateful every single day.

2) If I can come from pretty much hating myself and thinking most everybody wanted nothing to do wih me to being able to hold normal converations, anyone can. If God can use me, He can use anybody. The God who heard the cries of His children in bondage in Egypt heard my cries in the middle of the night when I felt alone and abandoned. And He hears your cries, too.

I love this testimony and I’ve borrowed it for my own. I am just a nobody trying to tell everybody about Somebody who can save anybody. That really is all you need to know about me. I’m just a vessel that God uses. Many times, I’m amazed at what God can do through cracked vessels like me.

Remember tonight that your Abba is very fond of you. He knows where you are and what you’re going through. He hears your cries, even when they have no sound. He heard you calling His name even when you can’t speak. He has His everlasting arms underneath you and He is singing over you. I hope you can hear it.

Mostly, I hope you never will cease to be amazed at what God does in and though and around you. I for one never will.

What Do I Know?

/ Ragamuffingospelfan / 1 Comment

What do I know? Apparently not much. I wake up every day and feel like I know less than I did before. It seems like I find out on a regular basis that there is so much more that I had no clue about. But I still know a few things. None of them are new or original, but I think I needed the reminders today.

1) Jesus still loves me like no other and thinks that I’m still to die for.

2) God’s not even remotely close to being done with me.

3) Sometimes blessings do come in disguises and answers to prayers rarely look like what you expected or come when you expect them to.

4) Cats are funny animals. Especially mine. She cracks me up all the time. She probably looks at me and thinks, “Dude, you seriously need a hobby or a girlfriend or something. Go away.”

5) Friends are the best. I never cease to be amazed at how Jesus speaks to me though my friends and how much of Him I see in them.

6) Family is good, too. Gotta give ’em props since they gave me life and all.

7) It’s still impossible to mess up so badly that you are beyond saving and too broken that God can’t fix you. God is still the best at making brokenness into something beautiful.

8) I don’t have to apologize for who God made me or for the way my life is unfolding. I don’t ever have to be ashamed of who I am or what I believe. I is good people.

9) Life is short. If you don’t stop every once in a while and look around, you could miss it. Ferris was right.

10) No matter how crappy the day was or how badly and how often you screwed up and put your foot in your mouth, tomorrow is a new day. It comes fresh with new mercies and the the faithfulness of God that just won’t quit. You never run out of second chances.

An Apology From An American Christian

/ Ragamuffingospelfan / 1 Comment

I am an American and I am a Christian. That being said I have a few apologies to offer on behalf of me and all my fellow believers.

I’m sorry that we’ve shown you more anger and hate than love. I’m sorry that all you ever see from us is what we’re against and what groups we hate more than what we are for and who we love.

I’m sorry that we’ve complicated something that is really very simple. God loves you and wants you to know Him through Jesus.

I’m sorry that we’ve put barriers between you and Jesus, telling you that you need to get your life strightened up or get rid of your sins or start living right before you can come to Jesus. The truth is that you can come just as you are, no matter how messed up or broken or lost you are.

I’m sorry that we’ve turned God into a political platform and a means of getting our people into office and getting our laws passed. God is beyond Democrats or Republicans, liberals or conservatives, and is more concerned with the “the weak, the vulnerable, the useless” and the least of these than those with deep pockets and political connections. God loves and blesses those who know they have nothing to offer in return.

I’m sorry that I didn’t go out of my way every day to show you Jesus and just how amazing He is and how He changed my life. I was afraid and ashamed and silent.

I’m not sorry that we profess that Jesus is the way, the only way, to heaven. I will proclaim that every other religion is about getting to God, but Christianity is how God came down to us in Jesus.

I believe that God loves and uses imperfect people. He pours out His love through broken vessels. Ultimately, it’s not about me showing you how strong I am or how great my faith is, but being a living example of how God’s strength is made perfect in my weakness and how He can move mountains with my mustard seed-sized faith.

God, we need you every day. We are hopelessly lost without you. Only You can make our lives shine and turn our brokenness into beauty. God be God in us.

A Prayer on a Good Day

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God, I had a good day today. Thank you. I found myself tuning in to Your voice more and in to my fears less.

Even on days like today, I realize that I need You just as much on the good days when everything goes right as on the bad days when it feels like I’m falling apart. I need You every waking moment, especially in those moments when I feel like I’ve got it under control and I can handle everything.

I read that self-discipline doesn’t lead to a continous prayer life nearly as much as realizing that I am poor in Spirit. I have nothing without you. I am helpless without You.

I know without You, my life will turn into a first-class fiasco.

Help me to remember that You are so much bigger than my little world. The truth is that You have invited me to be a part of something that is way bigger than me. Your plan involves people from every part of the world calling on the name of Jesus.

I am absolutely desparate for You. Fill every part of me with every part of You and use me however You will. Show me where You are working and help me to be the hands and feet of Jesus there.

Most of all, show me again how to come to You as a child, holding back nothing but bringing my messes to you. Remind me to come just as I am and not worry so much about cleaning myself up or polishing up my vocabulary or choosing what I think You want to hear.

On the days when I still listen to my fears, remind me that You have already conquered them. Help me to hear Your still small voice whispering my name. Remind me again that I am Your Beloved.

Lord Jesus, have mercy on me, a sinner.

A Letter from Jesus Christ

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This was written by a sixteenth-century Catholic monk named John of Landsburg. This spoke volumes to me today when I read it in A Praying Life by Paul E. Miller.

“I know those moods when you sit there utterly alone, eaten up with unhappiness, in a pure state of grief. You don’t move towards me but desperately imagine that everything you have ever done has been utterly lost or forgotten.  This near despair and self-pity are actually a form of pride. What you think was a state of absolute security from which you’ve fallen was really trusting too much in your own strength and ability. Profound depression and perplexity of mind often follow on a loss of hope, when what really ails you is that things simply haven’t happened as you expected or wanted.

“In fact, I don’t want you to rely on your own strength and abilities and plans, but to distrust them and to distrust yourself and to trust me and no one and nothing else. As long as you rely on yourself you are bound to come to grief.  You still have a most important lesson to learn; your own strength will no more help you to stand upright than propping yourself on a broken reed. You must not despair of me. You may hope and trust in me absolutely. My mercy is infinite….”

If I could add anything, it would be that the economy of faith, weakness and dependence are good things. Utter helplessness leads to desparate prayers which God hears. As long as we’re self-sufficient, we will never really and truly pray. Only when we come to the end of ourselves do we reach out.

I’m learning it’s okay to be weak and dependent and helpless because that’s where I find that God is my strength and my source and my ever-present help. And for the record, all of this is from A Praying Life, which you should go buy and read now.

 

Ten Years Ago Today

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It’s been ten years ago today. Really? Ten years? I can hardly believe it’s been that long.

Ten years ago my boss called me into his office where the television showed the first images of the first building being hit by the plane. No one knew what was happening and it all seemed so surreal.

Ten years ago I remember being shellshocked at something like this acutally happening on American soil and so many people losing their lives.

Ten years ago, everything changed and we knew even then things would never ever be the same.

Ten years ago, we found something to unite us all as Americans.

Ten years ago, those of us with eyes to see caught a glimpse of the vulnerability and temporal nature of earthly kingdoms. No kingdom of this world lasts forever.

Ten years ago, God was still on His throne and still in control. Ten years later, He still is.

Ten years ago, the final page in God’s own Book had been written and it hasn’t changed since then.

One day, whether it be tomorrow or ten days or ten years or ten thousand years, this world will end.

One day, Jesus will come back.

One day, everything wrong will be put back right and everything we’ve lost will be restored. One day, the good and pure and just will triumph for good.

Remember this. No terrorist or weapon or army or anything else in this world can separate us from the love of God. Not even death can keep God’s love from us.

That was true ten years ago and that’s still true today and that will be true ten years from now. And forever.