grace

Thoughts on Job

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When I was little I used to pronounce the book of Job like it rhymed with rob. For Psalms, I made the s silent and called it Palms. I did some goofy things back then and it’s a good thing I’m past all that now (said with very heavy tone of sarcasm).

I read through Job again last night (and now I know it’s pronounced like Jobe as in Kari Jobe, the singer). It was not an easy read for me and most of the time, left me feeling more uncomfortable than uplifted.

In case you’re not familiar with the story, Job is a righteous and wealthy man. Satan taunts God and says that Job is only faithful because God has blessed him so much. “If you take all that away,” Satan told God, “your so-called servant Job will curse You to your face and be done with You.” So God allows Satan to take away Job’s possessions, then his children, and finally, his good health.

True, Job never curses God. Job never abandons God. But Job questions God’s motives and comes very close to maligning God’s character. That’s the part that makes me uncomfortable. Because I have asked some of the same questions and made some of the same accusations toward God.

I never bad-mouthed God in front of anyone or even out loud to myself, but in my head, I would have rants against the seeming unfairness of God’s ways. In my heart, I sometimes felt that God was not really for me and had something other than my best interests at heart.

The truth I have been learning is that God is big enough to handle my questions and accusations. He is not obligated to explain Himself to me. His ways are higher than mine and His thoughts way above mine. That comes with a finite mind trying to grasp what is Infinite.

I love Job’s final response, because it’s what I want to be able to say to God and what I’m striving toward in my daily walk of faith:

“Job answered God: “I’m convinced: You can do anything and everything.
   Nothing and no one can upset your plans.
You asked, ‘Who is this muddying the water,
   ignorantly confusing the issue, second-guessing my purposes?’
I admit it. I was the one. I babbled on about things far beyond me,
   made small talk about wonders way over my head.
You told me, ‘Listen, and let me do the talking.
   Let me ask the questions. You give the answers.’
I admit I once lived by rumors of you;
   now I have it all firsthand—from my own eyes and ears!
I’m sorry—forgive me. I’ll never do that again, I promise!
   I’ll never again live on crusts of hearsay, crumbs of rumor.”

God, I know that You are for me, with me, and in me, even when everything I see and feel and think says otherwise, because You promised You would be. If You say it, that settles it– whether I believe it or not.

I do believe. Help my unbelief.

A Letter to Kim Kardashian

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Kim,

I don’t know if you will read this or not. Realistically speaking, I’m pretty sure you won’t, since you probably don’t have time to read blogs by people you don’t know who aren’t famous. But if by some extremely remote chance, you happen to stumble on this quaint little blog, I hope you know I’m rooting for you.

I know a lot of people will look at your decision to start a Bible study and question your motives. They will say you just want to hook up with Tim Tebow or give some other reason why you can’t legitimately want to read God’s Word for its own sake.

I am not one of those.

I hope you read the Bible and find all that God has for you in there. I hope you find God’s love letter to His people, including you, and how much He loved His people and what great lengths He undertook to win back His people lost to sin and death.

I hope you will find that true beauty is in what God says about you, not what some magazine or television producer says about you. God says, “I made you and that makes you beautiful, because I made you in My image.”

I hope you will know that Jesus loves you just for you, not because of what you do or what you wear or who you know. I hope you can find joy in the fact that Jesus looked at you in your worst moments and thought you were still to die for.

I hope you fall in love with God’s Word and want it more than anything else. I hope you are transformed by what you read and that every time you read the Bible, you put it down a different person than when you picked it up. More than that, I pray you will take what you read and live it out in compassion for the needy and love for those whom God loves.

I hope you understand that no matter what you’ve done in the past, God has a purpose for you. He can work in and through you to do some pretty amazing things that will blow you away.

Like I said before, I’m rooting for you and hoping you find the peace you’re looking for.

Signed,

A Ragamuffin who is just trying to tell others about the grace of God that he’s found

PS It’s still not too late, no matter how messed up your life seems right now. Jesus can still turn your mess into something beautiful.

Revisiting Forgiveness

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“Forgiveness is the name of love practiced among people who love poorly. The hard truth is that all people love poorly. We need to forgive and be forgiven every day, every hour increasinly. That is the great work of love among the fellowship of the weak that is the human family” (Henri J.M. Nouwen).

When you don’t forgive and hold on to bitterness and anger, it’s like you’re drinking poison and expecting someone else to die. Whoever hurt you may be completely unaware that they did anything and living in blissful ignorance while you’re still stuck in the moment of your hurt.

When you forgive, you open wide the doors to the prison cell only to discover that you were the one being held prisoner all that time by the past and by the pain you held on to for so long. The shackles you unlock were your own, the chain you forged in life while you nursed the anger and bitterness and were held captive by your hurt.

Forgiveness is where you realize that the wrong done to you pales in comparison to the wrongs you did to God, and the debt owed to you is like pennies in comparison to the millions you owed. You could never have hoped to even begin to pay for the debts your sin incurred, yet God freely and completely forgave you. How can you not forgive someone else who has wronged you?

Forgiveness is not easy. In fact, it’s humanly impossible. Only a heart regenerated and transformed by Jesus can forgive. Only those who have experienced the amazing unmerited grace of Jesus can extend it to those who don’t deserve it. Only those who have been forgiven can forgive.

But if you call Jesus not only Savior, but Lord, forgiveness isn’t an option. Jesus taught us to pray, “Forgive us our debts as we have forgiven our debtors.” In the parable of the ungrateful slave, Jesus points out that we get forgiveness only as much as we are willing to give it.

Learning to forgive is a lifelong process that we never really master. Some things and some people take longer to forgive because the hurt runs deeper and the scars are more fresh. But if you have been truly forgiven, then you will seek to forgive others. Sometimes, the hardest person you will have to learn to forgive is yourself.

Lord, give us each day more and more of Your heart that loves the unloveable and extends grace to those who need it most but deserve it least. Help us to forgive.

Trust

/ Ragamuffingospelfan / 4 Comments

Trust is so easy to talk about, but not as easy to live out, particularly in the arena of faith.

I pay all sorts of lip service and sing about how much I trust Jesus, but in the moments when I can’t see my way, that trust is hard to find.

It’s in those moments when friends seem most distant and my dreams seem unreachable that I find out how much I trust and in what or whom my trust is placed.

If I’ve learned anything lately, it’s that God is trustworthy. God alone is trustworthy. If I put my trust in those around me, they will let me down. If I put my trust in an expected outcome, it either won’t come to pass or I will get what I sought after only to find it wasn’t what I really wanted after all.

Jesus alone has been worthy of my trust and proved Himself to me over and over. He has a history of coming through for me in just the right moment, when I needed Him most but often expected Him the least.

So I ask you? Do you trust Jesus? Do you trust Him in the dark as well as in the light? Do you trust Him when everything in you is telling you not to?

Maybe you think you can’t. Maybe you can’t find it in you right now.

Maybe the only thing you can do is simply say the words, “Jesus, I trust you with my life.”

They might sound phony in your own ears and you might not feel any differently. Keep saying those words over and over. Make them the mantra of your heart.

If you don’t have the whole faith thing figured out, neither do I. We mess up more often than not in this walk toward maturity in Christ and often turn to anything and everything but Jesus in our neverending search for meaning and significance and fulfillment.

I may not always trust what I see and feel. I may not trust in my own abilities or in the way I’m going. But I can most assuredly trust in the One who is leading and know that He will never lead me astray.

So can you.

 

Still Thankful for Grace

/ Ragamuffingospelfan / 1 Comment

On the days when I’m feeling spiritually strong and I am seeking God with all my being, I need grace.

On the days when I barely make it out of bed before I fall into temptation and the rest of the day is spent digging out of one trap after the next, I need grace.

On the days when I hear God speaking to me though His word and I feel my purpose more clearly, I need grace.

On the days when I read a bunch of words that I forget the moment I put my Bible down, when I feel like my existance is pointless and futile, I need grace.

When I’m asking for forgiveness for something I’ve already done, or worse yet, something I’m about to do, I need grace.

No matter how faithful or faithless I’ve been in the last 24 hours, I still need grace.

I will need grace to sustain me and save me every single day for the rest of my life.

The more I see my need for grace, the more thankful I am for it and the more willing I am to extend it to others around me who need it as much as I do. The more I see that I just can’t do it alone and that I need brothers and sisters who will walk beside me and encourage, challenged, rebuke, and spur me on to continue in the faith.

May you see your need of grace all the more each day and come to be thankful that where you are weak, His grace is still very much sufficient. May you see that at the end of the day, all that you can say that got you through will have been grace and only grace. May you not only reach out to take it, but also to extend it to those around you who certainly don’t deserve it, but need it just the same.

Kinda like you and me.

What Maturity in the Faith Looks Like

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I had some random thoughts on the concept of maturity as a believer and what that should look like. Not that I’m so very mature or perfect, but I’m beginning to catch glimpses of what the finished product will look like.

It means that I am finally comfortable in my own skin. I’m not wishing I were taller or shorter or better looking or 5 to 10 pounds lighter. It means I look in the mirror and really like the person looking back.

It means I am at peace with the silence and don’t need constant noises to distract me from my own inner monologue. It means I can be alone and not always have to be in a crowd or with people all the time.

It means that I am finding my completeness in Christ and not looking for something or someone to validate my existence or give my life meaning. I am not defined by a relationship or the lack thereof, by my income level, my living situation, or anything else but by what God has told me and who He has said I am.

It means there is not a person out there that I can’t learn something from. It also means that I never reach the point where I will finally have all the answers and have God figured out neatly into a tidy doctrinal box.

It means that I am strong enough to be weak, and more than that, to boast in my weaknesses, so that the power that raised Christ from the dead, that resurrection power, can work best in me.

It means I have learned that some of the most important words are “I’m sorry. I was wrong. Forgive me” and “I will choose to forgive you.” When speaking to God, the two most important phrases are “Help me” and “Thank you.”

It means that you look for the best in others and always give the benefit of the doubt and never, never, never, never give up believing in or praying for those in your life who are trying to do right.

It means that I can love as God loves, giving without expecting anything back. It means that I become a vessel always being filled with the love of Jesus and always running over and always overflowing on to those around me, so that God is truly loving those people through me.

Finally, it means that I am already who God said I would be. I am perfect and holy and righteous because He declared it to be so.

Ok, I lied. One more. It means that no matter how hopeless or bad or forlorn my situation looks like, I can know that it will turn out for the best, because God will finish what He started in me. One day, sooner than later, it will all have been worth it and there will not have been any part of my story that God didn’t turn into something beautiful.

 

Some Things I Wish You Could See

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The media and the culture of the day tell you all the things you are not. They remind you constantly of all that you don’t have, all that you lack, all that you should be, etc. If you listen to the television and the radio and read the internet and magazines, you feel like you aren’t worth very much and that you’re not pretty enough or rich enough or suave enough. In short, you’re not enough.

But I am telling you a different story. I want you to hear it here, even if you’ve never heard it anywhere else. It’s not really my story, but the one God told me that I am telling you now.

God says you are enough. God says, “I made you and when I was done, I didn’t say, ‘Close Enough’ or ‘That’ll have to do,’ but ‘It is very good.’

Paul talks about how you are God’s masterpiece, created to do the great things He planned for you to do long ago. He made you perfect and He made you with a purpose. That means you are exactly who God wanted you to look like. That means you are not a waste of space or meaningless, but priceless.

I wish you could see yourself through God’s eyes. I wish you could see that Jesus thought you were to die for and worth all His precious blood. I wish you could see not all your shorcomings and failures and inadequacies, but the image of God in you. I wish you could hear not all the names you’ve ever been called in anger or frustration, but the name God calls you in love: BELOVED.

The media will lie to you. What you read and hear and see all around you will lie to you. Sometimes, even what you think and feel will lie to you. But God never will. What He says is true and trumps whatever anybody has ever or will ever say about you.

That’s what I wish you could see and believe and hold on to in the hard times. Because that’s the truth, and the truth will set you free.

Lessons from Joseph

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I’ve been reading in Genesis about the story of Joseph. If you’ve been around Sunday School when you were little, you probably know the story. Joseph is one of 12 brothers who was thrown in a pit, then sold into slavery. He ended up in a high-ranking officer’s home, until that officer’s wife tried to seduce him and then when her efforts failed, accused him of rape and had him thrown in prison.

The story concludes with Joseph’s ability to interpret dreams landing him in a very high position in the Egyptian government, second in command only to the Pharoah himself. His brothers come to him in the midst of a famine, hats in hand and begging for a handout. When they learn who he is, they’re sure he will have them enslaved. But then some of the most beautiful words in the Bible:

What you meant for evil, God meant for good.

The very worst the brothers could do to Joseph ended up being the means God used to bring about a chain of events that led to the saving of an entire nation. Joseph could have been bitter and vengeful– he had every right to be– but instead chose to be thankful and grateful and to forgive because He was able to see God’s hand at work in his life.

No matter what’s been done to you or what you’ve done to yourself, God can turn it into something beautiful. No matter how much of a wreck your life has become, it is never at any point past redeeming or saving.

Paul later stated that God works all things together for good to those who love Him and are called according to His purpose. Even the very worst that people could dream of or inflict on you.

I love what one pastor said: “God can take the worst moment of your life and make it the first line of your testimony.”

That’s true. God took the very worst that humanity could do to His Son Jesus and turned it into the salvation of man. In fact, that was God’s plan all along to have His Son tried unjustly, beaten, mocked, and crucified so that those enemies could become sons and daughters of God.

Let Joseph remind you of the power of forgiveness and love to change anything. Let it remind you that with God, all things are possible.

More Random Things I’m Thankful For

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I mentioned some of the things I’m thankful for a couple of blogs back and I decided to add these to the list:

1. Getting to sleep in on certain Saturdays. It’s nice to be able to look at 5:30 am on the alarm clock and roll over and go back to sleep.

2. Good stories that make me lose track of time, whether they be in books or movies or TV shows.

3. That who I am is who God tells me I am, not who I or anyone else tells me I am. Not what I’ve done. Not my mistakes or failures or even my good deeds. I am God’s beloved.

4. That this is not one of those essays that has to be 500 words or else I get counted off on my grade.

5. The peace that transcends all understanding and comes when I least expect it and need it most.

6. Grace.

7. That I know so many awesome people who have inspired me and challenged me and loved me and made me want to be more like Jesus.

8. That the best things in life are still free.

9. That when I press “publish” some little men inside my computer box will make this go out over that great and mysterious internet to people I may never meet but who may be inspired to find something of their own to be thankful for and find the God from whom all these blessings flow.

Random Things I’m Thankful For

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I am thankful for the following (not in any kind of  sane or logical order):

1. The existence of chocolate (just knowing it’s out there makes my day better)

2. Ditto for caffeine.

3. I’m thankful for the days that I’m just glad to get to 4:30, because they make the good days seem even better.

4. Lost on blu ray (I’m up to season 3, in case you’re wondering).

5. Friends who have stuck with me all this time and still want to be my friends.

6. Ditto for family.

7. Jesus who is the same yesterday, today, and forever.

8. Friday. No matter how long or short the week seems, every calandar I’ve ever seen has plenty of Fridays on it, and I’m always glad to see each and every one.

9. All those things I routinely take for granted like good health, access to food and clean water, shelter, etc.

10. That you people are still reading these blogs after 6 months and 520 blogs.

11. That I don’t have to limit these lists to 10. I can go to 11, ’cause I’m a rebel.

12. Ditto for #11.

13. And I’m not superstitious, either.

14. 12-year old mildly psychotic cats named Lucy who climb up in my lap and go to sleep (I can feel my blood pressure getting lower even thinking about it).

15. That tomorrow when I wake up God’s mercies will still be new and His grace will still be amazing and His plan for my life still unfolding and His faithfulness will still be great.