Friends And All That

I love the TV show Friends. I’ll admit that. I love the characters and how they interact and how while relationships and love interests come and go, that core group of friends remains intact. Well, at least it did for 10 seasons. But it seems that just about everything good comes to and end on this side of heaven.

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about friendship. I know I am still a novice when it comes to being in a friendship that goes beyond the surfacy “How you doin” kind of relationship. I don’t always get it right. Sometimes I try too hard and say the wrong thing or press too hard.

I’m starting to see that not every friendship will last forever. Not every relationship should.

I don’t mean that the relationships are bad or toxic or destructive. I don’t mean that something bad will happen to mess up a good thing.

What I mean is that sometimes God puts people into our lives for a limited time. Some are there for 5 minutes, some for 5 months, some for 5 years and some for 50. That’s just the way God intended it.

I may only have one or two meaningful conversations with you and never see you again, but walk away a better person because of those conversations. That relationship has served its purpose.

It’s not up to me to sustain every one of my relationships. If that person is meant to be in my life, God will keep him or her there. He or she will be around. That’s not to say that I can’t do my part to be supportive and encouraging and a good listener. But I don’t have to worry constantly about ruining the relationship.

Honestly, that epiphany has lifted a proverbial weight off my shoulders. I don’t have the anxiety of worrying if my friends will desert me after they find out what a humongous goober I am. At least I have a lot less anxiety in that regard.

I can only do my part and be the best friend I can. I can’t worry about how the other responds or about how much or how little of an impact I have on the other person. I can try to be Jesus and leave the results to God.

I have an awkward confession to make. I took one of those “Which Friends Character are You Like?” quizzes on facebook a couple of years ago. I was sure I’d be like Ross or maybe even Chandler or possibly Joey. I ended up being most like Phoebe. I never saw that one coming. But I can see that spontaneous free-spirit sometimes. And I do so like smelly cats.

So I can watch re-runs of Friends and be grateful for the friends I have while I have them. So can you.

Ready for Fall

I have had enough of summer weather. There. I’ve said it. No more 95 degree temps, please.

I want some crisp autumn breezes. I want to see leaves changing colors. I want hot apple cider and hot cocoa and bonfires and all those things that come with fall weather.

Not that I don’t like summer. Usually for about 2 weeks, then I start getting tired of being hot and sweaty all the time. And believe me, I do sweat a lot, so it’s not fun.

I think the reason I love fall so much is that it triggers so many good memories for me. I go back to all those marching band trips and high school football games and youth retreats of yore. I remember all those fun Halloweens when I was growing up. I recall Gatlinburg in October when it was cold enough to finally wear a jacket.

I won’t lie. If I could live in a place where the temperature was a steady 72 all year round, I could go for that. Especially someplace near the beach, like San Diego. That would be awesome.

But part of me likes the changing seasons. It’s probably the ADD in me that likes the change.

Most of all, autumn reminds me that after all the leaves have fallen and that winter’s on its way, there will be a spring and a rebirth of all things green. Just like one day there will be a new heaven and a new earth. I hope the new earth has leaves that change colors and fall every year.

I like fall because I am a fan of hope. And fall reminds me that my hope in God won’t be in vain. One day, God will set things right and everything in my life will make sense. One day I will finally be all that God created me to be.

Until then I make do with trusting God for today and enjoying the fall-ish weather we’re having in the Greater Nashville area. It’s lovely.

 

Etch-A-Sketch Theology

 

Raise your hand if you’re old enough to remember the Etch-a-Sketch. I am. I was never very good at the controls but I had fun with one of those back in the day. I was reminded of them when I saw Etch-A-Sketch art for sale at a Greek festival I attended.

The only problem with that is when you shake the device, whatever you’ve created is erased and you’re left with a blank slate.

Some people have what I like to call Etch-a-Sketch theology. It works just fine until some tragedy or loss shakes them, then their whole belief system vanishes.

Usually the theology that gets rattled is the kind based on feelings and circumstances.  The kind that looks at God as a cosmic genie bound to give us whatever we want and to make our lives easy and comfortable with no sickness or pain of any kind. The kind that sees sins to avoid rather than people to love.

I’m not saying that I have the perfect theology and that everything I believe is spot-on. I freely admit there’s a lot that I don’t know and have to leave up to God. I’ve had my doubts and fears along the way, but God has proved stronger than any of those.

The kind of theology that stands all kinds of weather is the kind that comes from immersing yourself in God’s Word. It comes in hanging around godly people who have survived their own storms and made their fair share of mistakes and learned a lot. It comes from a humble and teachable spirit.

I hope you find a theology that’s built not on shifting sands or prevailing winds but on a solid foundation. Or as the old hymn says,  “My hope is built on nothing less than Jesus’ blood and righteousness.”

Safe in the Storm

I’m sitting here typing contentedly away on my laptop and listening to the rain lash against the window of my bedroom. I hear the thunder rumbling in the distance. I love it.

I don’t love storms when I’m driving in the middle of them and can barely see the road through my windshield. But when I finally make it home, I can breathe a huge sigh of relief.

I think it was John Piper who describe the fear of God kind of like being in a storm from a safe place. You’re able to witness the power and majesty of the storm while protected from the dangers of it.

I think we forget that God is all-powerful and all-present sometimes. We focus on the loving aspect and forget sometimes that He is also a holy God. Well, I do, anyway.

It is a good feeling to know that this God who could destroy me with one word from His mouth calls me His child. He has promised that He won’t leave or forsake me and that He will finish what He started in me.

He’s promised to bring me safely through those storms that come into my life. Not only that, but I will come out stronger on the other side.

I am learning what it means to fear God. I am learning that if you fear God, you need fear nothing else, for if God is for you, who could ever be against you? This fear of God isn’t a trembling terror, but more of a reverential awe of a God who is bigger than all that is and has existed before anything was. This same God who knows my name and the number of hairs on my head.

I pray you find that fear of the Lord that leads to wisdom. I pray you know that God is holy, but that He loves you more than you can possibly imagine. By the way, the storm has passed, as all storms do. But God remains.

 

 

There Be Dragons in the Book of Revelation

I started attending a new Bible study led by Mike Glenn, pastor of Brentwood Baptist Church and lead teacher at Kairos on Tuesday nights. It’s all about the mysterious book of Revelation. Yeah, that scary book at the end of the Bible before you get to the maps.

It’s really not about how things are eventually going to turn out one day. It’s about how they already are. It’s not about how one day Jesus will ascend to the throne, but how He’s already there.

I confess I’ve missed the point of the book in the past. It’s not about who the anti-Christ will be or what day the end will come. The reason John wrote the book was to encourage believers who were facing intense persecution by a very hostile and anti-Christian government.

It’s about how evil forces in the world will try to rise up against God and His people, but how God in Christ has already overcome the enemy. The outcome is not in doubt. Jesus has already won the battle at Calvary.

The best takeaway from tonight’s study was that this book was written in worship to communities of worship about whom to worship. Not Caesar, but Christ.

Revelation is a reminder that the ending to my story is already written and it is a happy ending. No matter what I’m currently facing or how hopeless my situation seems sometimes, the best really is yet to come.

So I suppose I really will be spending a lot of time in that last book of the Bible. I could read all the commentaries and bible study guides and Tim LaHaye books in the world, but I’d be much better off just reading the book itself. Only God’s Word is living and active. Only God’s Word is God-breathed.

There will be more about those dragons and seven-horned beasts and other special guest appearances from the Book of Revelation in blogs to follow. I’m looking forward to it.

 

A Disciple

I’ve been thinking quite a bit about what being a disciple of Christ really looks like. I think it looks like more than someone who is a fan of Jesus, who likes Him on facebook. It’s more than someone who goes to church every Sunday and reads the Bible every now and then.

Back in the day, if you wanted to be a disciple of a rabbi, you would literally leave your family and your job and go live with the rabbi. You would eat your meals when he ate his, go wherever he went, and sit at his feet and hang on every word he spoke. You would try to become just like the rabbi you were a disciple of.

That’s what it means to be a disciple of Jesus. You leave everything else behind and immerse yourself in Jesus’ words. You spend as much time with Him in His Word and in prayer as it takes. Which honestly is a lot more than I typically spend in either of those things. More than knowing about Jesus, you want to know Him and follow Him.

A disciple is someone who belongs to Jesus. Oswald Chambers put it best when he said, “If any man come to me and does not hate his father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters, yes, and his life also, he cannot be My disciple,” not, he cannot be good and upright, but, he cannot be one over whom Jesus writes the word “Mine.” Any one of the relationships Our Lord mentions can compete with our relationship with Him. I may prefer to belong to my mother, or to my wife, or to myself, but if that is the case, then, says Jesus, you cannot be My disciple. This does not mean I will not be saved, but it does mean that I cannot be ‘His.'”

A disciple is willing to stand up to both political parties and hold them both accountable to what the Word of God says. Not what FoxNews or CNN or MSNBC say, but what God in Scripture has already said. A disciple is willing to stand up for the unpopular truths that will get him or her possibly ostracized and ridiculed and thought of as old-fashioned and narrow-minded and out of touch with reality.

If those are some of the qualifications of a disciple, then I’m not there yet. I still love my comfort way too much and I have too many allegiances and loyalties to people and things other than Jesus. Probably the majority of Christians, especially in America, would be in the same category.

Lord, make us disciples who are willing to forsake everything to follow You, no matter what.

A Good Reminder to Myself

I talk to myself sometimes. Out loud. I tend to use a British accent so it’s more fun and less creepy.

Sometimes, I have to remind myself of certain things. Repeatedly.

1) You are not your job (or lack of one). You are not your salary. You are not a title or a profession. You are exactly who God made you to be. And He said you were good.

2) God’s in the past where you messed up and where you got hurt, healing your wounds so they no longer bleed into your present (thanks to Mike Glenn for that one. He’s right there with you in your present. And He’s already in your future, waiting on you with plans that will blow your mind.

3) It’s okay to feel scared and unsure. It’s okay to have doubts because faith by its very nature comes with doubting. If we knew with 100% certainty, we wouldn’t need faith.

4) If you are loved and if you have friends, you are not a failure. If God loves you and calls you friend, then you have already won.

5) Whatever happened today, be it good, bad, or ugly, tomorrow is a new day filled with fresh possibilities and a clean slate. You can start over.

Maybe you’re having a great day and you’re loving life and everything is going your way. That’s wonderful. Maybe not. But everybody will at times go through storms. Everyone will go through deserts where your faith seems dead. Everyone will go through dark nights where God seems impossible to find.

No matter what your feelings or senses tell you, no matter what your circumstances tell you, God is there. He has not left you. He has not forgotten you. And He never will.

By the way, this blog is best read with a British accent. It sounds so much more sophisticated that way.

A Place to Belong

“That’s plain enough, isn’t it? You’re no longer wandering exiles. This kingdom of faith is now your home country. You’re no longer strangers or outsiders. You belong here, with as much right to the name Christian as anyone. God is building a home. He’s using us all—irrespective of how we got here—in what he is building. He used the apostles and prophets for the foundation. Now he’s using you, fitting you in brick by brick, stone by stone, with Christ Jesus as the cornerstone that holds all the parts together. We see it taking shape day after day—a holy temple built by God, all of us built into it, a temple in which God is quite at home” (Ephesians 2:19-22).

That’s what everybody is looking for, isn’t it? A place to belong? A place where we feel welcomed? I think so. We all want to be a part of something that is bigger than our individual selves.

No one likes to feel left out or unwanted. No one wants to feel ostracized and rejected.

That’s the beautiful part of the Gospel. God wants you to be a part of what He’s doing in the world. He wants you. Once you say YES to Him, you’re no longer a stranger or an alien or an outcast. You belong. You matter. You are now a child of the King.

That’s what the Church really is. A community of nobodies that God chose and gave a new name and purpose to. Strangers who now belong to God and to each other.

Maybe you know what it’s like to be picked last for a kickball team (or not picked at all). Maybe you know what it feels to be the only one not invited to a party. Maybe you know what it’s like when it seems like everyone is talking to everyone else in a group but you.

You have a purpose. You have a God that picked you because He wanted you and placed you in a family whose bond is stronger than flesh and blood.

You belong.

 

 

Church and State and Everything in Between

First of all, I’d like to state for the record that both Sarah Palin and Nancy Pelosi get on my nerves, so I guess that makes me an independent.

Tonight at Kairos, Mike Glenn spoke about politics and the Kingdom of God. Basically, he said we as the Church (in general) gave up faith in the power of the Gospel and traded in the role of prophet for the illusion of political access.

We thought that if we got “our” people into office and got “our” laws passed, things would get better. But you can only pass laws to keep people from hurting their neighbors. You can’t pass laws that make people love those neighbors.

I heard a great analogy tonight. Food doesn’t change the salt, but rather salt changes the food. In the same way, the world shouldn’t change believers, but believers should be the ones changing the world. We are called to be salt, and it only takes a little salt to make a big difference.

Why do we act surprised when lost people act like lost people? Are they the problem with this country? Is it dark because the darkness killed the light?

It’s dark because the light has failed. It’s dark not because believers have been too different from the world around them, but because we haven’t been different enough.

This made me think: some people are so good at blending in with the world that even Jesus won’t be able to recognize them when He comes back.

I’ll say it again that it’s not about taking back a country (that was never really ours to begin with), but advancing a Kingdom. Our hope doesn’t lie in a President, but in a coming King who will set all things right.

Do go and vote. That’s important. But at the same time don’t put your hopes for a better future into the hands of politicians, because that has never ended well.

Long after presidents and countries and politics are no more, Jesus will still reign as King and Lord over all. Long after political parties have bit the dust and governments have fallen, Jesus will still be in charge.

That’s where my hope lies.

Just Relax

I have yet another confession to make. I over-analyze everything. Well, most things anyway. I can wreck myself thinking too much about conversations I’ve had where I spoke and should have been silent or was silent and should have spoken. I’ve analyzed to death things friends have said that really didn’t mean what I thought they meant.

The word for today for me (and for you if you’re like me) is RELAX. Don’t over-analyze and don’t try so hard to force an outcome in your situation. Instead, enjoy the moment and watch expectantly for God to act.

I don’t mean veg out on the couch and eat bon-bons all day (or oreos, if you feel bon-bons aren’t manly enough). Live your life and have faith, or as Oswald Chambers said, “Trust God and do the next thing.”

God will act when He’s ready. When you’re really and truly ready and not when you think you are ready. In my experience, the longer the wait is, the better the surprise God has for you.

Sometimes, you wait until you think you can’t wait any longer. You hold out until you are absolutely about to run out of patience and strength and willpower. And then you wait some more. You come to the end of yourself and all your schemes and plans and the only prayer you can pray is, “Lord, help.”

The last time I checked, God was still sovereign. God was (and is) still in control. He still knows the number of hairs on your head and the number of tears you cry in the night. He more than anyone knows the secret desires of your heart and He more than anyone knows what will make you come alive and where you were created to be.

So relax. God’s got this. Like the old saying goes: there is a God and you’re not Him. I know for me, that’s a big load off my shoulders.