Christianity

The First Letter to My Future Wife in 2013

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I have a confession to make to you. I actually gave up on you for a little while. I gave up hope that I would ever meet you. But now I have hope again.

It may the tiniest bit of hope, but it’s there. It may not always be visible, but it’s strong enough to hold on to. I will never give up believing in you and praying for you until the day I meet you.

At this rate, we may both be 80-something and senile, but we’ll have fun– at least for a little while.

Don’t give up on me either. Don’t quit praying for me as I won’t give up praying for you. May we both commit to growing closer to Jesus and by that way grow closer to each other. May your first desire not be to find me, but to seek after and hold on to and treasure Jesus for all he’s worth. May that be my first desire, too.

I’ll be honest. Right now, meeting you seems like an impossibility, humanly speaking. But I believe that God is at his best at making the impossible possible. So I keep hoping. And praying. And waiting.

I pray that I don’t find you until I’m ready to love you like I’m supposed to love you. Like Jesus loved his bride and laid down his life for her. Like he will call me to love you when I meet you.

Until then, my hope is secure in the only place that can’t be shaken. It’s in God himself. I pray yours is, too.

 

 

Good Memories

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For some odd reason, I had a strong craving for some chicken tetrazzini yesterday. It’s not a dish you can get just anywhere. In fact, the last time I had this was probably almost 18 years ago in my last semester at Union University.

I still miss that place and the people there. Well, most of the people I knew there have long since moved on. I’d guess that I wouldn’t know more than five people currently on campus. If that.

Even the campus is different. Even before a tornado struck the campus, Union was already undergoing major renovations. Now, the campus is almost completely different than when I went there. But I guarantee that the moment I step on to the campus, all sorts of good memories would come rushing back.

I was not a ladies’ man at Union. Despite the 5-to-1 ratio of girls to guys, I had no luck. But I made some friendships that changed my life. I saw people who modeled the faith in a way that made it relevant and exciting and fun. People who wanted to hang out with me.

It took a long time to pay off those student loans. But it was so much more than worth it to me for the good times and good friends I made.

Some times, I wish I could step back into one of those memories and relive it. To be able to smell the scent of spring on its way and see the face of people I haven’t seen in years. To hear the old jokes and stories again.

Some friends I’ve kept up with, some I’ve reconnected with recently. Some I’ve lost touch with. But I’m grateful for them all.

If you’re a high school senior or junior looking for a college where you won’t feel lost in the crowd, then check out Union. There I was challenged both academically and spiritually. There I learned to put feet on my faith and walk it out.

I know I’ve probably said this before, but to all my old Union friends, thank you for making my time there so wonderful. I am who I am now because of you.

 

 

Worship Music Perspectives from a Non-Worship Leader

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Worship_Music_Hands_Lifted

Don’t get me wrong, I love me some worship music. Especially a lot of the new songs that have emerged in the last five or so years. I can’t get enough worship music from Passion, Hillsong, Kari Jobe, All Sons and Daughters, and so many other incredible artists who have brought renewed integrity, passion and artistry into worship music more than ever before.

But sometimes I wonder if some of the songs aren’t too me-focused. As in “I’m gonna lift my hands” or “I’m worshiping with all I’ve got” or “My love for you, Jesus, will never stop.” In other words, it’s all about how God makes me feel and how I’m going to respond.

My issue isn’t primarily a theological one. It’s just that I know me too well. I know that some days my faith is vibrant and alive and I can sing songs like these with all my heart and really mean it.

But there are days I’d be much more reluctant to sing these lines. I’ve gone through whole days without picking up a Bible or praying even once. I’ve spent days barely even giving God a thought. My faith has been virtually non-existent at times.

I think lately the worship songs that resonate most with me are the ones focused on what God has done for me. Better yet, the songs that are focused just on God. Sometimes, I need to know that my God is an awesome God. I need to know that my God is mighty to save. I need to know that my God is stronger than any other.

The point is that God is flawlessly faithful. He really is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow. I’ll continue to have my ups and downs, days when I’m on fire and days when I’m ice cold in my faith. God will not. He can’t ever be anything but 100% loving, 100% faithful, 100% mighty to save, and 100% for me.

That’s what I want to sing about. Because most days that’s what I need to hear.

Hope

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shawshank

“Remember Red, hope is a good thing, maybe the best of things, and no good thing ever dies” (from Shawshank Redemption).

I love The Shawshank Redemption. Especially the last 15 minutes. I won’t spoil the ending for you, but I will say that you find out that appearances can be very deceiving.

The line about hope is one of the best lines in the movie, and there are plenty of good ones. I think the apostle Paul said something similar when he wrote, “This doesn’t mean, of course, that we have only a hope of future joys—we can be full of joy here and now even in our trials and troubles. Taken in the right spirit these very things will give us patient endurance; this in turn will develop a mature character, and a character of this sort produces a steady hope, a hope that will never disappoint us” (Romans 5:3-4).

I want a hope that never dies. I need a hope that doesn’t disappoint.

I’ve put my hopes in things that certainly let me down, like relationships or jobs or even sports teams. I fully know what it’s like to be disappointed when a friendship doesn’t go the way you wanted, or a job you banked on comes to an end, or that team you wanted so badly to win loses.

But I’ve found when my hope is squarely set on God, I’m never disappointed. Ever. I’ve never been let down. Not even once. I haven’t always understood the paths he’s led me down, but I’ve always known the destination would be worth it.

God is a sure thing. Though heaven and earth pass away, his word will remain. That’s something you can hope in. And you and I both need something we can hold on to and hope in in these very uncertain times.

I’m praying you find this hope to be better than you ever thought it could be and the God of hope more faithful and true than you ever dreamed he could be,

Unexpected Find

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I found something interesting while I was cleaning out one of my desk drawers. It was something I’d written some time before. At least I think I wrote it. Still, I echo the sentiment it contains:

Be radical in serving
Be militant in loving people
Be fanatical in forgiveness and grace
Be sacrificial in worship

I think these things describe Jesus’ earthly ministry. He was all these things and so much more. I also think this is what believers are called to be. Not safe. Not comfortable. Not status quo.

We’re called to be radical, militant, fanatical, and sacrificial. But not in hate. Only in the love of God.

After all, that’s the kind of love that God shows us every single day.

 

 

This Wacky Weather We’re Having

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I know I should be used to it by now. I’ve lived in Tennessee all my life and still I am constantly amazed, disturbed, awed, and surprised by it. The weather.

Take the 10-day forecast. We go from a high of 68 one day to a high of 32 a few days later. That’s like having two completely different seasons in one week.  Which proves that Tennessee weather is certifiably insane.

Yep, it’s true. Tennessee weather is wacky. But not as much as my emotions most of the time.

I can go from elation to despair in a matter of moments. Or from happy to angry in one second.

You know what that’s like. All it takes to ruin your happiness is the perception that someone ignored you. That’s all.

That’s reason #1 for me not to trust my emotions. After all, as a friend said once, feelings will lie to you. If you let them, they will blow a minor incident way out of proportion. And emotions are affected by so many things like lack of sleep, what you ate (or didn’t eat) earlier that day, how much exercise you’ve gotten, etc.

My friend also said to trust in what you know. And what is that? Only what I’ve come to learn over the years. That God is faithful and true to his promises. That his word is as good as done. That when God says it, that settles it, regardless of whether I believe it or not (and I so wish I could take credit for that one).

Trust that God knows what he’s doing even when it doesn’t seem like it. When it doesn’t feel like it. Because your feelings will change, but God won’t. Your feelings come and go, but God remains.

I still don’t know what to wear anymore. If I wear a jacket, it will be warm outside. If I don’t, I freeze. Go figure.

 

Hang In There

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You’ve seen one of these. I know you have. It might have been in someone else’s dorm room or on some random bedroom wall (but of course never on yours). The infamous poster of a ridiculously-cute kitten hanging onto a tree branch with some variation of “Hang in there, sport!”

Those have become somewhat of a joke these days, kinda like the “Baby on Board” signs in backs of cars or the “Honk if you love. . .” bumper stickers. But sometimes you’re in a place where you really do need that reminder.

Maybe you’re in a place where it seems like every molecule in your body is telling you to quit. 100% of your emotions are telling you to give up, that it’s just not worth it, and to stop trying anymore.

Don’t quit. Don’t give up. Don’t believe the lie that it’s not going to ever get any better. Don’t for one second fall for the notion that the world would be better off without you. Don’t ever listen to the voices that tell you you’re not wanted or welcome.

I don’t have secret wisdom or profound insights on this. I do know that I’ve wanted to give up. I’ve been in a place where I didn’t think it would ever get better. But it did.

Sometimes, the best thing you can do is rest. Get some sleep. Don’t try to figure out your life when you’re tired or upset or not feeling well. It’s amazing what better perspective you have in the morning.

When you can’t believe, God has faith enough for both of you. When you can’t go on, he has more than enough strength to carry you. When you don’t have words to pray, he hears your sighs and counts your tears. He knows.

So, as cliched as it may sound, hang in there. It may be dark right now, but daylight is coming.

Comparison Shopping

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cash register 3

You gotta love the new trend in internet shopping. I mean the one where you go to a website that helps you find the best deal on planet tickets, hotel rooms, or just about anything else you might want to buy. That’s where comparison is a good thing.

But I’ve found myself using comparison in a way that’s not so good. As in when I compare myself to some one else. I see someone who’s found true love and I wonder why I haven’t. I see someone who’s found a career that’s a perfect fit and who loves going to work every day and I wonder when that will happen for me.

I read somewhere that comparison is the thief of joy and contentment. Comparison either leads to pride when you think you’ve got something that the guy next to you doesn’t, or envy when the guy next to you has something that you don’t.

Comparison is always misleading because you never know the whole story. Appearances can be so very misleading. That man or woman you’re comparing yourself with may be happy in that one area, but struggling in another area that you don’t know about. He or she may actually envy you for something you have that he or she doesn’t.

If you have to compare yourself, compare yourself with where you used to be. Remember where you were and see where you are now. Look how far God has brought you. Look at what you’ve already overcome.

Rejoice for those who have what you don’t. Root for them and keep your eyes where they belong. And that’s on Jesus. He didn’t create you to live someone else’s life or be who he created them to be. He created you to live the life he custom-made only for you.

Your path is your own and no one else’s. Your timetable is your’s alone. You get where you need to be, not when everybody else does, but when in God’s perfect timing. Not a moment sooner and not a moment later.

Imaginary Girlfriends and Other Odd Topics

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Yeah, I heard about Manti Te’o’s imaginary girlfriend. I don’t know (and I don’t care) if he was in on the hoax or not. I’m not even sure what the point was. In fact, the more I think about it, the more it makes me want to lie down and take a nap.

But if I had an imaginary girlfriend, she’d look a lot like Zooey Deschanel. Or possibly Grace Kelly (if we’re allowed to use dead celebrities). And knowing my luck, I’d fool exactly no one. But she’d be pretty.

It seems to me that there are so much more out there that’s news-worthy. Imaginary girlfriend hoaxes strike me as being tabloid fodder more than actual news stories. But then again, I am not in charge of what is considered news.

That’s why I like my television to be as unrealistic as possible. Reality is too weird. I’ll stick to aliens and vampires and zombies and alternate universes. You know, the normal stuff. I avoid reality television shows like the plague and am drawn to shows like The X-Files and Charmed and Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Revolution (I do like some current series).

There’s not really a moral lesson in all this. Well, maybe this. I have enough trouble keeping my own life in line without worrying about other people’s issues. I certainly can’t cast any stones when I see my own long list of past mistakes and stupid choices.

I’m not quick to jump on the moral superiority bandwagon and bash those who’ve lied or cheated or messed up in some way. Who knows? I might have done the same or worse in a similar predicament.

I’d better end this quickly. My imaginary (and pretty) girlfriend just texted me and wants to set up a skype session. Now, I’m thinking she looks like Selma Hayek.

PS I’ve changed my mind again for the last time. Introducing my imaginary girlfriend whom I text every night. We are so very close, in a completely virtual way.

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It Runs in the Family

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boots

When I was little, I used to love to go over to my grandparents’ house. One of my favorite things to do there was to find a pair of my granddad’s boots and walk around in them. They probably came up to my knees and were way too big for my little feet, but I didn’t care. Just the fact that I was walking in my grandfather’s shoes was enough for me.

Fast forward about 30 or so years. I’d been living in Nashville for 5 years and felt the time was right to complete the acclimation by purchasing a pair of cowboy boots. I mean, I’d already started listening to some country music (just not the kind where the girl thinks the tractor is sexy).

I looked at a lot of boots. There was one pair of Dan Posts (shown in the above picture) that I was drawn to the first place I looked. No matter how many other places I looked, I couldn’t find any others that seemed to call my name the way these did. I can’t explain it other than to say that these boots spoke to me.

I shelled over $230 bucks for these bad boys. I know in cowboy boot world, that’s not a lot. Boots can easily get up into the $3000 and up category, especially if they’re custom made. But that was a LOT of money for me to spend on shoes.

It turns out that my grandfather’s favorite kind of boots were Dan Posts. I didn’t find that out until after my purchase, but it was a kind of  confirmation for me that I had picked the right pair.

Now every time I put them on, I feel like I’m walking in his shoes, so to speak. And it feels good. It makes me grateful to have been a small part of a legacy of love.