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Wanted: One Ghost of Christmas Past

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ghost of christmas past

This may seem like an unusual request. I’m not Ebenezer Scrooge and I’m not a penny-pinching miser who’s doomed unless he changes his cold-hearted ways.

But I’d like one Ghost of Christmas Past, please. Not the very distant past, but my past.

I’ve been thinking about loved ones who won’t be here this Christmas and missing them very much. I’ve been thinking about others who are getting older and realizing they aren’t as immortal as I used to think they were when I was little.

ghost of christmas past 2

I’d like to go back to Christmases past, not to change anything or even to talk to anyone, but to sit back and listen. To hear the voices long since silenced and see the faces that are harder and harder to remember.

I’d love to see both my grandfathers again and see them both healthy and happy and enjoying the holiday season. I’d love to see my uncles at peace with the world and, more importantly, at peace with themselves.

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I’d love to see all my family together under one roof and everybody at their best selves, when they were happiest and most content and knew who they were and who everybody else was.

Maybe this isn’t possible. Maybe some I won’t ever see again, save for heaven someday or in my dreams.

Maybe my lesson for this Christmas is to treasure those who are in my life right now and not to take anyone for granted, whether they be family or friends.

Maybe it’s to learn the lesson that Scrooge learned all those Christmases ago: “And it was always said of him that he knew how to keep Christmas well if any man alive possessed the knowledge.”

Yeah, that sounds good. I honor the memory of those who’ve gone on before me by honoring the living and most of all, by honoring the true spirit of Christmas and the infant found in the manger who grew up to be Savior of the world.

So maybe I’ll skip that ghost. But I’d still like a good cup of wassail.

 

 

Not-so-new Thoughts on Newtown, CT

/ Ragamuffingospelfan / 3 Comments

theodentheoden2

“No parent should ever have to bury a child.”

That’s the line from the movie The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers that King Theoden uses when he talks about the death of his only son, the one that was to be king after him.

I’ve thought a lot about that line today, especially after hearing and reading so much about the senseless killings of at least 20 children and 6 adults in Newtown, Connecticut. I have no way to comprehend the level of sadness and grief that so many people are feeling right now, and I’m not going to pretend that I understand what they’re going through.

I know that no discussion about limiting handguns or locking school doors will ever bring these children back. This is so much more than political issues; we’re talking about human lives lost. Each one had a family who loved him or her and each one is deeply missed.

I’m reminded of another massacre. This one happened after the birth of Jesus, when Herod sent soldiers to the town of Bethlehem to kill all the male children under the age of two. Matthew says (quoting Jeremiah), “A voice was heard in Ramah, weeping and loud lamentation, Rachel weeping for her children; she refused to be comforted, because they are no more” (Matt. 2:18).

Again, I can’t begin to imagine what that must have been like.

Most of all, I am reminded that God himself watched as people took his only son and falsely accused him, beat him, mocked him, mutilated him, then killed him in the most excruciatingly painful manner possible. Even though Jesus’s death was ordained from the foundation of the world, it doesn’t change the fact that the Father’s heart was broken that day.

I think the Father weeps with all those who weep tonight. He sees his creation and his people broken and in disarray. He sees evil acts perpetrated by sick minds and his heart is broken.

I don’t pretend to have any answers. I don’t pretend to know why this happened or what the purpose was behind it. I do know that even in this, God works all things together for good to those who love him and are called according to his purposes.

I know that God is good and that he is in control. Still. And in that I put my hopes and I lay my head down to rest tonight.

I pray for peace right now in the hearts of all who are grieving and who cannot be comforted, for their children are no more. I pray for peace for the children who lost parents and teachers tonight, as well as the family of the mentally ill man who killed all these children before killing himself (who are probably in shock and grief as well right now). May you be present in these broken homes and lives right now. And may you set all things right one day very soon.

Come, Lord Jesus, come.

Great North Star, But I’m Tired

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I’m tired. When I left my temp job for the day, I was actually sore. I can’t remember the last time I was ever sore from a job, but I was today. Plus, I haven’t slept very well the last two nights.

I don’t think that will be a problem tonight.

I am reminded of the verse in Matthew where Jesus says, “Come to me, all you who labor and are weary, and I will give you rest.” It could also be rendered, “Come to me, all who work to the point of exhaustion, and I will give you rest.”

I think it can mean sleep. But more than that, it means that we cease striving so much. It means that we give up the ever-present need to always perform and to do and to acquire. It means that we are content with who we are and where we are in life.

It means that we know that ultimately it’s not up to us. God’s in control and he will take care of us. As simple as that sounds, we are a forgetful people who need reminding of the very simple and basic truths that we aren’t in control.

We need to remind ourselves that it’s alright to leave some things undone every now and then. It’s not the end of the world if every box isn’t checked on that to-do list. It’s no good accomplishing all your goals if the end result is burn-out and exhaustion. We need rest.

We need to cultivate times of quiet reflection where we can hear the still, small voice that refuses to speak over the continuous drone of our everyday lives. The voice that reminds us that we are not the sum of our possessions or our activity, but we are who God made us to be and who he calls us– beloved.

So take time tonight or some time in the morning to be still and know that God’s plans for you are good. Remember to find times of refreshment and rest and solitude.

That’s what I’m about to do.

 

Little Victories

/ Ragamuffingospelfan / 2 Comments

Sometimes, we make Christianity an “all or nothing” affair. That means if I don’t completely succeed, I’ve failed. If I don’t completely overcome every temptation and obey the voice of God at every turn, I’ve lost.

But I think that’s not how it works. Most days are three steps forward, two steps back. Most days, you win some and you lose some, but you always learn something from it.

I’ve learned that sometimes you have to be thankful for the little victories. Sometimes, those are the only things that keep you going when the battle seems hopeless and life seems too hard.

I found today that it was okay that someone I wanted to notice me didn’t. A conversation I wanted to happen didn’t and I was more than okay with it. I was fine.

I didn’t try to force something that wasn’t there. I stepped back and trusted God. I count that as a little victory.

It’s when you don’t give into fear. When you don’t let anxiety overwhelm you. When you’re able to take a couple of deep breaths and plow through. You may not look so pretty at the end of the day, but you’re alive and standing. And in my book that counts as a victory.

So here’s a lesson I’ve learned the hard way. Don’t be so hard on yourself. Don’t beat yourself up when you’re not at your best or when you mess up yet again. Remember that God really is bigger than the problems you’re facing. Remember his plans for you are still good and still in operation.

Remember all the little victories you’ve experienced over the years. Also remember that the biggest victory of the biggest fight you will ever face is already won. How do I know? Because Jesus has already won it.

 

 

Lost and Found

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Today, I found an old poster I made. It was when Lucy my cat got out on the day before Christmas Eve and got lost and I couldn’t find her for 2 days. I was a wreck, emotionally and physically and in every other way. But as I sit here typing, I can see her giving herself a bath. It’s been almost 9 years ago, but she’s still around and none the worse for wear, save a tiny scar on her nose and a few extra pounds.

I had just about given up hope of ever finding her again. I would look at pictures of her on my computer and bawl like a baby. I really thought she was gone for good.

But today I was reminded that I too was lost once. Maybe not as dramatically, but I was lost. Then Jesus found me. I know I’ve taken that for granted for far too long, but today I am especially grateful that he did.

It doesn’t matter if you’re 7, like I was, or 77. If you feel lost, you can know the feeling of what it means to be found again. You can know that not only is someone out there looking for you, but that Someone has found you and is calling you back home.

Lucy is 12 now. She’s a bit slower and she sleeps more now. But I’m still thankful that she’s still around. I still think finding her again on Christmas Eve was my best Christmas present.

I’m also thankful that Jesus has still got me. He’s not letting go. He won’t let me get lost again, even though I may still try at times to run away. He promised not to leave or forsake me.

Here’s a prayer for all the prodigals in your life. May they hear the call of their Father and find their way home. I’m glad I did once.

 

Thanksgiving Once More

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Thanksgiving feels a lot like the red-headed stepchild of holidays lately, don’t you think? It seems that in the retail world, most jump from Halloween directly into tinsel and mistletoe and everything Christmas. You don’t really see much in the way of Thanksgiving decorations and there’s one lone television special dedicated to this holiday (at least that I’m aware of). And there aren’t too many artists jumping on the Thanksgiving album bandwagon lately.

But Thanksgiving has never really been about crazy shopping or spending lots of money. I’ve always thought of it as a quiet sort of holiday without the need of commercialism or promotion. To me it’s been about good food and good times with family around the table. It’s been about setting aside one day in the year to reflect back on the blessings and plenty that we’ve received and to be grateful and thankful for it.

I know when I honestly assess my own life, I have much to be thankful for. Sure, I don’t have everything I want. But I have everything I need and then some.

I heard once that if all God did for me was save me and that was all, I’d still owe him an eternity of praise. Even if he never gave me one more blessing or gift beyond that, I’d run out of time before I gave him the thanks he was due.

But God has done so much more than that. He woke me up again this morning. He let me enjoy the day with good health and the freedom to express my faith as I see fit and to live my life as I choose. He has even allowed me to make the dumb choices and reminded me that those mistakes aren’t the end of the world and those failures aren’t what really define me at the end of the day. His love for me does.

So I’m thankful. I may be like a broken record when I say that I’m thankful for all of you who read this little blog, but I say it anyway. I hope each of you have plenty to be thankful for. I pray God reminds you of all the blessings, great and small, that you have received.

Happy Thanksgiving!

What to Wear This Holiday Season

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“So, chosen by God for this new life of love, dress in the wardrobe God picked out for you: compassion, kindness, humility, quiet strength, discipline. Be even-tempered, content with second place, quick to forgive an offense. Forgive as quickly and completely as the Master forgave you. And regardless of what else you put on, wear love. It’s your basic, all-purpose garment. Never be without it” (Col. 3:12-14, The Message).

No, this is not a fashion blog. It’s more of an attitude-adjustment kind of blog.

The holiday season is vast approaching. Some are looking forward to traveling and seeing relatives, many of whom you only see on Thanksgiving and Christmas. Some are dreading the awkward conversations and the even more awkward silences that are just as much a part of the family tradition as stuffing your face with turkey and gathering around the TV for the ol’ football game.

Maybe this season, try something different. Put on compassion. Instead of being so exasperated with THAT relative who gets on your very last nerve, try to understand why he or she is that way. Maybe try to see things from his or her point of view.

Try grace. You know you’ve been obnoxious and annoying at times. You know you’ve put your foot in your mouth a time or two and said some things you’d prefer were never brought up again. Ever. So when someone else annoys or upsets you with an offhand comment that comes out wrong, be forgiving.

Try humility, remembering that the other person bears the image of God just as much as you do. Remember that you were just as much in need of forgiveness and grace as the other person.

If all else fails, eat as much turkey as possible. With all that tryptophan running through your system, you won’t care anymore what anybody says. Plus, you can’t really say anything stupid with your mouth full.

Rainy Thursday Night Reminders

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uncle billy

Side note: I thought about titling this “The You-niqueness of You,” but decided against it, because I actually want people to read it.

I think sometimes we have a “one size fits all” theology when it comes to how God operates in people’s lives. Testimonies have to be bloody and dramatic and have a pivotal moment when the main character hits absolute rock bottom and has no where to go but up.

But not all testimonies are like that. Some people grow up around church and get saved at an early age, but it took just as much of a miracle to save them as it did the drugged-up alcoholic who comes to Christ after a near-death experience. Both are equally valid testimonies and both can reach people.

Jesus never healed people the same way twice. Every call for people to follow him was as different as the individuals he called. God’s plan for your life is as unique as you are.

Don’t ever let people force God’s call on their lives on you. Don’t let other people define your life by their (or some other arbitrary) standard. Your life and your ministry are your own.

I love a story I read in Johnny Cash’s autobiography. He relates a story about how a music executive was looking for the next Randy Travis. Johnny Cash basically told him straight up, “What’s wrong with the Randy Travis you have?”

You are not called to be the next Billy Graham and save millions of souls. You are not called to be the next Mother Teresa. You are called to be you, just as I am called to be me.

Honestly, sometimes I get discouraged because my life doesn’t look like someone else’s. But God’s plan for me is my own. It may not look like your’s or anybody else’s, but it’s still mine.

The only question is this. Will you be faithful to God’s call on your life? Will you obey what you know God is calling you to do right now at this very moment? Will you accept where God has you as a gift and an opportunity to reach out to the people he’s put in front of you?

Late-Night Thoughts About Joseph

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“Joseph replied, ‘Don’t be afraid. Do I act for God? Don’t you see, you planned evil against me but God used those same plans for my good, as you see all around you right now—life for many people.'” (Gen. 50:20)

As I have confessed before, there’s a whole lot I don’t know. Especially when it comes to why horrible things happen to godly people. I can point to verses that talk about God working in mysterious ways and how he works all things together for good, but at the end of the day, I’m unable to explain why God couldn’t have worked it out for them in a less painful way.

That’s when I yield to faith. I yield to what I know of God and his character. I yield to what I know of his proven track record in my own life. And I have to fall down on my knees and confess that he is good and that I have nowhere else to turn.

Joseph comes to mind. If anyone in the Bible had a right to play the victim card, it was Joseph. Sold into slavery by his own flesh and blood, falsely accused and slandered by the wife of the man that he had done nothing but serve faithfully for years, and forgotten in prison by those who promised they would remember. I would have thrown in the towel long before then.

But Joseph chose forgiveness. He chose to look with eyes of faith to what human eyes couldn’t see– that God was working even in the worst of circumstances to save not just one man, but an entire nation. He, like so many others, looked to the promises of God and counted them as good as done even when they seemed as good as dead.

I love what a pastor says. God can take that worst moment of your life, that most painful and humiliating season, and make it the first line of your testimony. To borrow a quote I’ve heard a lot lately, he can turn your mess into your message, your test into your testimony, your trial into triumph, and the victim into a victor. You will be able to speak to the pain that no one else can touch because you’ve walked through it.

I love this verse in Hebrews 11: “By an act of faith, Joseph, while dying, prophesied the exodus of Israel, and made arrangements for his own burial.” In other words, Joseph saw that God was able to redeem every single part of what he went through for a purpose far greater than himself. A purpose that saw the rise of a people of God, and later the Messiah.

May you and I see our circumstances with that kind of faith. May we trust that God is just as able to redeem our pain to make something equally as glorious and beautiful out of our messes.