My sister and I were talking today about some old times, and I made the comment that it’s funny how the most random occurances can trigger dormant memories I thought were lost.

For me, a certain smell or combination of smells has the ability to instantly conjure up a very concrete and specific memory from childhood. The aroma of baked rolls always takes me back to Sunday lunches after church at my grandmother’s house.

Diesel exhaust fumes, especially from a bus, can whisk me away to memories of high school marching band trips and youth retreats. It’s almost as if I’m 16 again and feeling the same kind of excitement and anticipation of what’s ahead.

For the time being, some people I love only live for me in my memories. Photographs can capture an image, but they don’t necessarily capture the essence of someone (or at least not for me).

I recently wrote about some of the special people and places and events from years past that I miss. I may have to add a sequel to that post, as I’m constantly reminded of old memories that I wish I could revisit.

Man, I sure could go for some rolls right about now.

 

I finally got around to the season 8 finale of The Walking Dead. It was every bit as good as advertised, as that all-out war between the Saviors and Rick’s Gang finally came to an end.

The payoff was worth it. It even made the last two seasons better.

But one line hit me in the gut. In a good way.

I’ll try not to give anything away, but just in case . . . spoiler alert.

Near the end, Rick has the chance to end someone’s life (and could easily be seen as justified in doing so), but chooses to spare said person’s life.

He says, “My mercy prevailed over my wrath.”

I love it when that happens.

I love it when forgiveness wins over bitterness, when enemies become friends, when understanding and  dialogue win the day.

I still love the Hebrew word hesed. As I heard it explained again today, the word is essentially untranslatable, but could be rendered as “when the person who I have no right to expect anything from gives me everything.”

Mercy triumphs over judgment.

I’m thankful that God’s mercy triumphed over the wrath that my sins deserved. I’m thankful that grace is a daily gift that allows me to wake up every morning.

I’m hoping always to be a man of mercy and grace whenever possible because I’ve benefitted from and been transformed by both.

 

Here’s how I look at it:

Expectations = Entitlement

Gratitude = Gift

That’s it.

Gratitude teaches me that God doesn’t owe me anything, but rather that I owe Him everything.

Gratitude reminds me that what God gives me is often way better than anything I could ever expect or hope from Him.

Gratitude tells me that if I must have expectations, to expect that God will continually surprise me in countless ways each day and every day.

Today, my expectations were a sunny spring day and a hike at Radnor Lake State Park.

The reality was more very unspringlike weather and some hot tea, Netflix, and good conversations with a friend.

Sometimes, I think my expectations are a little unrealistic. I think the ones I love, whether friends or family, will never move away, grow old, get sick, and die. I think I can somehow wish the present last forever.

The reality is that this is not all there is. This is not the best there is. Something way better is coming, and some that I love have been fortunate enough to get there early.

So my gratitude outweighs my expectations today. It’s been a very good day.