On Tuesday, Kairos is doing something a bit different than the usual Tuesday night worship gathering.

We’re doing a 90s Night of Worship, complete with all 90s worship songs and plenty of 90s references and fashions. I plan on wearing a very 90s shirt, but I haven’t gotten much beyond that. What I need are some 90s style loud shorts that I think used to be called jams.

I have been working diligently on my 90s playlist. So far, it’s got all the essentials from Christian radio back in the day, including DC Talk, Jars of Clay, Plumb, Crystal Lewis, Audio Adrenaline and many, many more. It sounds like something straight out of one of those cheesy Time Life commercials.

I was not a fan of much of the 90s music back in the 90s. I was still upset that grunge killed the careers of lots of my favorite 80s hair bands. I didn’t quite get the baggy jeans and flannel look. But the decade has grown on me. Don’t judge me, but I think that for the most part, 90s music is better than 80s music.

But not to digress too far. Anyone in the Nashville area is invited to come to the Kairos 90s Night of Worship on Tuesday, May 23 at 7 pm. It’s gonna be whack. It’s gonna be all that and a bag of chips. It’s gonna be all those cringy 90s catchphrases that nobody uses anymore . . . except sometimes me.

Be there . . . or don’t be there.

“Timothy J. Keller, husband, father, grandfather, mentor, friend, pastor, and scholar died this morning at home. Dad waited until he was alone with Mom. She kissed him on the forehead, and he breathed his last breath. We take comfort in some of his last words, ‘There is no downside for me leaving, not in the slightest.’ See you soon, Dad” (Michael Keller on behalf of the entire Keller family).

I read that one compliment that touched Timothy Keller and moved him to tears was that he made Jesus beautiful. In the end, it wasn’t about how many people listened to his preaching or how many books he sold or how many people quoted him, but in that because of him, people met Jesus and saw Him as beautiful. I hope that will be my legacy some day.

John the Baptist said that it was his goal in life that he should decrease so that Jesus might increase. I think that was the life of Tim Keller in a nutshell. That was his ministry. That was his passion.

I imagine that the first words he heard in heaven were from Jesus telling him, “Well done, good and faithful servant.”

But far more than hearing the words, the best part for Tim was seeing Jesus, having his faith made sight and his joy made complete. He has not really died, to borrow words from Billy Graham. He is more alive than ever. He has simply changed his address to an eternal destination.

“Sometimes the most gracious, merciful thing God could ever do is wound you. To wound you (and in that wound bind you to Himself), is far more gracious than to bless you with everything you want and have you not know Him” (Matt Chandler).

I read a book once called A Severe Mercy, about a man who lost his wife to cancer and all that God taught him through the process. I don’t for one second believe that God gave her cancer solely to teach him a lesson. I think that it’s the result of a fallen world and God’s sovereignty. I don’t begin to understand why God allows these things, but I trust that God is good and that God is great.

C. S. Lewis once said that pain is God’s megaphone to rouse a deaf world. We typically don’t listen to God very well when all is well with our world. When we are flush with success, we forget God and think we did it all by our own might (and I think the Bible has something to say about that).

But trials and hardship are where we learn the most about God. They’re where we learn not just about God but also where our experience of God goes from theoretical and theological to intimate and personal. As much as we want those proverbial mountaintop moments of joy, the valley of dull drudgery and patient suffering is where we grow into who God made us to be.

Just as Jesus chose the nails and the cross, so He told us that if we want to follow Him, we have to take up the cross daily. We go where Jesus went, through death into life, through sorrow into joy. But the best part is that Jesus goes with us through all of it.

May we embrace these wounds given in mercy as they draw us closer to the One who was wounded that we might be healed.

Today I automatically renewed my subscription for Audible, the wonderful app that lets you listen to all sorts of audiobooks. It’s like back in the day when the family would go on vacation and we’d stop off at the library to check out books on CD to listen to along the journey to pass the hours and make the endless tedium of interstate travel a little more bearable.

Now, they have it all contained within the confines of your smartphone. Instead of the bulky packaging of all those books on CD (or books on tape if you’re really vintage), you can get all the books in a device that fits in the palm of your hand. Ain’t life grand?

Currently, I’m in the middle of listening to the Complete Sherlock Holmes mysteries, taking me back to good old Victorian England. Next up will be one of my favorite authors, Charles Martin.

Having these audiobooks makes my daily commute bearable. In fact, I look forward to the drive so I can delve into the adventures of one Mr. Holmes and his trusty sidekick Watson as they solve all those crimes and match wits with the dastardly Professor Moriarty.

I can be stuck in rush-hour traffic and at the same time be transported back to 1890s London with the horse-drawn carriages and the gas-lit street lamps. The rainy afternoon drive home that used to get me stressed now only serves to add atmosphere to these British stories.

If you love good books and good stories and spend a lot of time in the car, I recommend Audible. It’s definitely worth the money, especially if you know how to wait for the sales and 2-for-1 credit deals.

Sometimes when you can’t find words of your own, it’s helpful to pray the words of others. Sometimes, they can express your thoughts and longings better than you can. Often, they are the tried and true petitions that saints of old have offered up to God through the ages.

The best is praying God’s word back to God. Also, prayer books such as The Book of Common Prayer, The Valley of Vision, and Every Moment Holy are useful. Sometimes, you can repeat the words of fellow saints when their words echo your own.

Here’s one I love that you can pray when you come to the point of absolute and ultimate surrender:

“Lord, I give up all my own plans and purposes, all my own desires and hopes, and accept Thy will for my life. I give myself, my life, my all, utterly to Thee to be Thine forever. Fill me and seal me with Thy Holy Spirit. Use me as Thou wilt. Send me where Thou wilt. Work out Thy whole will in my life at any cost, now and forever. Amen” (Betty Scott Stam).

“Lord, Thank You
I am not the mistakes I have made.
I am not the plans I have failed.
I am not the wrongs I have done.
I am not forgotten.
I am not abandoned.
I am not alone.
Because You say to the lost: Come.
You say to the Unlikely: Beloved
You say to the Battle Weary: Rest.
In a hard and beautiful world,
Your grace is the only pillowed relief for my tired soul
to rest in the Your making all things new.
#HonestPrayers” (Ann Voskamp)

Lord, thank you
That I am who You say I am
That I am Whose You say I am
That I am kept and loved and cherished and protected
Until the day faith becomes sight.
Amen.

“…you hear God whispering it like freedom today?
‘MY GRACE IS ENOUGH. IT IS ALL YOU NEED.’ 2Cor.12:9MSG
So take His words like a key & walk out of whatever cage you’re in:
Today’s bread is enough bread.
Today’s grace is enough grace.
Today’s God is *more than* enough God” (Ann Voskamp).

I’m thinking about those Israelites wandering in the desert. When God provided manna, some got greedy and tried to hoard it. But that manna wouldn’t last beyond the day. Instead, it rotted and had maggots and all sorts of grossness. God meant for them to learn the secret of living and trusting from day to day.

When Jesus tells us to pray, “Give us our daily bread,” He’s teaching us the same lesson. It’s no good worrying about something six months or six years down the road when all God has called us to be is faithful for the next 24 hours. God doesn’t provide for something we will face in the future. His abundance is for the present, for the moment you’re in.

I always love the prayer that goes along these lines; “Lord, I come to you with open and empty hands. If all I get from you is You and the next breath, that will be enough. Amen.”

Today’s God is indeed more than enough God for any circumstance.

So I made it back to Memphis. For the second time in three months, me and the family made the westward trek down I-40 to West Tennessee.

We checked out the Bass Pro Shops at the Pyramid, which was honestly a bit overwhelming but fun. We took the elevator to the top for a bird’s eye view of downtown Memphis.

Later, we had dinner with some other family, some of which I hadn’t seen in a while. It was good to catch up and to be reminded of how blessed I am to have such a wonderful and amazing family.

I will always consider Memphis as my hometown, but now it feels like a place to visit rather than a place where I live. While it’s my hometown, it’s not home. But I’m very thankful for those 34 years of living here that helped shape who I am.

Much of the time my life doesn’t make sense until I view it in the rear view mirror of reflection. I heard faith defined as trusting in advance what will only make sense in reverse. That’s a lot of what life looks like on this side of heaven.

I’m looking forward to the rest of the weekend in Memphis, leaving my expectations of what will happen up to God’s timing and providence. Let the adventure begin.

I’ve found that one of the most powerful words that anyone can hear follow along the lines of “I see you” and “You are not alone” and “I’m on your side.”

I can think back to high school days and the huge difference between feeling alone and having that one friend. To someone with lots of friends, it may not seem like much at all, but to the one with no friends, one can be the difference between giving up and persevering.

You can value someone even when you don’t agree on everything. You can support someone without endorsing all of their habits and actions. You can make someone feel welcome even if you’re the only one. You can love someone because you have known what it was to be loved — we love because God first loved us.

You can be the friend to the lonely person that you wish you could have had back when you were lonely. You can treat the other person with kindness like you received kindness at that moment when you needed it most but deserved it least.

You earn the right to speak the gospel into other peoples’ lives by making time for them and genuinely listening to them and loving them like Jesus loved you, forgiving them and seeking to bring out God’s best in them.

Just this.