Living Sermons: Thoughts from Tonight’s Kairos Roots

Something Aaron Bryant said really hit home with me today in a way few things have lately.

He said that we as believers could be the only sermons some people will ever hear.

Many people who will never step foot inside a chuch building are watching you and me. They are listening as we talk about our faith and how much we love the worship services and sermons we participate in each week.

But what speaks loudest of all is how we live. How we respond to bad days and failure and criticism. How we react when people yell at us or berate us or make fun of us and our beliefs.

When they see us not chasing after the next new big fad or product, they notice. They might think something like, “This is a person just like me who’s not captive to making the same bad choices I always seem to make. There’s something different about her (or him).”

When you exhibit contentment in Christ, it’s hard to miss. When you can be at peace in the middle of the chaos of a hectic day, it’s hard to miss. When you forgive after being hurt, they see Jesus in the flesh, your flesh, as He really is, full of love and grace and mercy.

You are preaching something every single day. How you live either glorifies you or God. How you treat others around you will influence how they see the God you profess to serve.

It’s not about being perfect and always acting out of love and never slipping up and giving in to anger. It’s about being able to ‘fess up when you mess up. It’s about being able to say the words, “I’m sorry. I was wrong. What I said (or did) didn’t reflect what I believe. Will you forgive me?”

So preach love. Not the touchy-feely sentimental much that passes for love these days, but the “get your hands and feet dirty” kind of love. The unconditional agape love that only can come from God, not from us.

Preach grace. Preach forgiveness. Preach not rules and regulations, but a better way to live.

St. Francis said it best (or at least this quote is always attributed to him, so that’s close enough for me): “Preach the Gospel at all times and, if necessary, use words.”

If you live Jesus on a daily basis, when the time comes, you will have an open door to share Jesus to a willing audience.

Something “Borrowed”

Like the title says, I am “borrowing” this one from tonight’s Kairos, featuring guest speaker Thom Wolf. He spoke about how God has provided the answer to how we are to live in the 21st century. The syllabus for life is found in Micah 6:8: “He has showed you, O man, what is good. And what does the LORD require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God.”

The three parts are justice, mercy, and faithfulness (see Matthew 23:23-24).

We must seek justice. Justice means that where you live never determines whether you should live or not. Justice means that no child should ever go hungry or die of preventible diseases or be sold into slavery or sex trafficking. Justice means that Jesus has come not to turn the world upside-down, but to turn an upside-down world the rightside up again.

We seek mercy. Not just to those who deserve it, for by its very definition mercy is always for those who don’t deserve it. By the love of Christ, we love our enemies into friends and then into brothers and sisters in Christ. We turn the other cheek and lay down our rights, looking to God to defend us. When someone close to us falls, we don’t extend a pointing finger, but a helping hand.

We seek faithfulness. I love the illustration of unfaithfulness as a step that looks outwardly sound, but is eaten away and has no real substance. You can’t depend on it or put any weight on it. Faithfulness means we don’t talk humbly before our God, we walk humbly. We live out what we profess and our actions and attitudes line up with our confessions.

If we live these things, we won’t ever have to con anyone into the Kingdom of God. We won’t have to ever trick someone into praying a prayer or manipulate anyone into a decision. If we do justly and lover mercy and walk humbly before God, we will show Jesus to the people around us and they will want to know Him.

I for one have been challenged to broaden my thinking and seek God’s heart for the world. If God has a special place in His heart for the poor and needy, outcast and forsaken, then why don’t I?

 

The Reminders of the Not Yet

Today was one of those days that contained elements of the good, the bad, and the ugly. To be sure, there was about 75% good, 20% bad, and only 5% ugly, give or take 5%.

The good: I finally found the laptop of my dreams. I think this will work and this time it will really last. Desktop, you were fun, but I think we both know it’s over and it’s time to move on.

The bad: For some reason, the drive to Chuy’s became much more of an adventure than it should have  been. I’ve been there many times before, but for some reason today, I was compelled to turn the wrong way off I-65 and to have to perform a semi-U turn to get back on the right track. It was a lovely and awkward driving moment that I will be doing my best to repress in the days to come.

The ugly: I seem to have screwed up a friendship before it really even got going. My social skills were AWOL for part of the night, and that was the part that I chose ever-so-wisely to have a conversation with the friend in question. Needless to say, I stuck my foot in my mouth up to my kneecap. It was awkward.

It’s okay that I’m not there yet. It’s okay that I don’t have it all together and have it all figured out yet. God does.

I can’t mess up so badly that He can’t turn my mistake into something beautiful and good. I can’t screw up something beyond God’s ability to fix it and make it right again.

God, I’m leaning on your promises tonight. I’m counting on You to work your purposes in my mistakes and take even the bad and the ugly of my day and work it for Your good.

Amen and amen. Pass the tylenol.

Teachability, Vulnerability, and Constructive Criticism

I hate public speaking. Whenever I had to do any kind of a presentation in class, I got the sweaty palms, mysterious flu-like symptoms (so I could get out of having to speak in public), and a strong desire to be a desert monk who has taken a vow of silence.

Most people are with me on this. I think people are more afraid of speaking in public than they are of dying. I know this to be true, because I found it on the internet, which is the bastion of all things credible and trustworthy. Especially Wikipedia.

I also hate giving criticism. I am a people-pleaser, so I hate to do or say anything at all that might cause tension in the relationship. In the past, my way of giving criticism was easy– avoid it like the bubonic plague.

But I’ve been thinking lately. If there was a way I could be better at something, I would want someone to show me. If I could improve in an area of my life, I would love for someone to tell me.

Criticism isn’t telling someone how bad they are. It’s telling them how they could be better. It’s not “Hey, your feet smell and you are a lousy, no-good blah blah blah,” but “Hey, I notice that you are really making an effort and doing a good job. Here’s a better way you could do this one particular thing. . . . ”

The Bible tells us to speak the truth in love. If it’s not truth, we’re enabling their mistakes and bad behavior. If it’s not spoken in love, then it’s condemnation and more likely to do more harm than good.

The best way to address a problem I see in someone else is to fix it in me. After all, we tend to project our faults onto other people and notice more readily in them the same weaknesses we struggle with (that’s my Union University degree paying off).

Actions speak louder than words, so the best way to change someone else is to tell that person how they are wrong, but to live out the right way. That person may not listen to you and may cut you off in mid-sentence, but you can show them the better way by listening to what they have to say.

The best way of all is to strive to be more like Jesus. If the people in our lives see us living out our beliefs in humility, authenticity, and transparency, they are more likely to listen to what we have to say. As I heard it put, preach the gospel at all times, and if necessary, use words.

Thoughts on Leadership

Before you tune me out, let me explain. I believe that leaders aren’t just pastors of churches or CEOs of companies. Leaders aren’t just those with big fancy titles after their names. A leader by simple definition is someone who leads and inspires others to follow.

You are a leader. Believe it or not, you are. Someone is watching you and what you do and how you live (not in a scary Big Brother kind of way). It may be your children. It may be your brothers or sisters. It may be someone you work with or play with or hang out with occasionally. You may not even know it. But people are watching you and following what they see you do.

In particular, people are watching your actions to see if they match what you profess to believe. People want to see if this Jesus you talk about really means enough to you to affect the way you live or if its just empty words.

While it sounds scary and intimidating, it can also be an exciting challenge. You have an opportunity to influence lives for the better. Someone who would never set foot in a church building or pick up a Bible could see Jesus in you. You may be the only Bible some will ever read, as I have heard it put before.

If people see you really striving to live out what you believe in total and complete surrender to and dependence on Jesus, they will notice. If they see you admit to your mistakes, seek forgiveness for when you mess up, and keep getting up after falling down, they will want to know why you’re different.

The question is not “Are you a leader?” but “What kind of leader are you?” and “Where are you leading to?”

The most important question that I ask you (and me, too) is “When people walk away from spending time with you, do they think how great and impressive you are or do they make much of the Jesus who has done such great things in your life?”

I hope for me its the latter. I hope the same for you.

To Be Known and To Know

I had a dream when I was in grade school where I walked into the wrong classroom on my first day of school and everyone stared at me like I had three eyes and antennas growing out of my head. It was not a good dream. I was very glad to wake up from that one.

I also remember in the past longing with everything in me for someone who would really know me and still want to be my friend. I’ve had a lot of surface friendships, but very few with people who really, really knew me.

I think just about everyone deep down wants to be known.

I think everyone wants someone who knows them for who they really are, with flaws and insecurities and fears, and still chooses to stick around.

I believe that everyone wants to be able to be themselves around someone, to be free to say dumb and awkward stuff occasionally and not be ostracized for it.

I feel that all of us want to be able to take the mask off, to not have to always respond to “How are you doing?” with “Oh, I’m fine,” but to really give the honest answer along the lines of, “I’m not doing so well today . . . .”

We long for someone who will see our brokenness and not shun us, who will see our weaknesseses and not treat us like lepers. Someone who will walk alongside us during the hard days and the tough times and will gently guide us back onto the path when we’ve strayed.

Jesus is the friend who sticks closer than a brother. He’s the one who knows our innermost being, including the deepest, darkest secrets we keep and the places we hide that no one else knows about.

I really and truly believe that to be known in that way requires two things. First, that we seek to know others in the same way and second, that we are brave enough to be that open and honest and transparent to let people inside.

My prayer is that you can be truly known for all of who you are and loved, first by knowing the God who made you and knows you better than you know yourself and loves you completely and perfectly, and then by people God will bring into your life who will inspire you and touch you and leave their footprints permanently etched in your heart.

The Next to Last Day of 2011

I heard a good joke today: What do you call the day before New Year’s Eve? New Year’s Adam, of course.

I can’t wrap my head around the fact that is is day 364 of 2011. It still feels like it should be August. Halloween and Thanksgiving and Christmas should all be months away.

But I’m looking at all those festive holidays in my rearview mirror and looking at 2012 coming up fast. Only one more full day and it will be a new year with all sorts of new potential and new possibilities and a whole slew of unknowns and variables.

Sometimes I wish I had a remote button for my life with an oversized pause button. That way I could stop everything and take it all in and appreciate all of it. I could stop and smell all those roses.

There is no pause button for life. There’s no way to stop time so you can really appreciate all you have. You have to let go of some good things that keep you from the better things and keep you from enjoying the little moments.

That’s why prayer is so important. It forces you to stop all the madcap rushing around and focus on what really matters in life and why we’re here. Prayer reminds us of two truths: 1) that we’re not in control and 2) God is. Prayer reminds us that we are still needy, dependent creatures who have nothing and can do nothing without God.

Life is too short for regrets and grudges and posturing and impatience. Life is now, and we miss it if we’re always looking ahead to the next big event. God is with us here in this moment where we are. We can’t hear Him if we’re dwelling in the past or always anticipating the future.

If you have a resolution for 2012, make it this: live each day as it comes and cherish every moment God gives you, for each moment is unique and will never come again in exactly the same way.

Happy New Year in advance from a nobody who’s still trying to tell everybody about Somebody who can save anybody.

Taken, Blessed, Broken, Given

lifeofthebeloved

“During the meal, Jesus took and blessed the bread, broke it, and gave it to his disciples: Take, eat. This is my body” (Matthew 26:26).

I’m in the middle of another Henri Nouwen book and I am loving it. He more than any other writer (except for maybe Brennan Manning) always seems to speak to where I am right here and now.

He says, “To identify the movements of the Spirit in our lives, I have found it helpful to use four words: ‘taken,’ ‘blessed,’ broken,’ and ‘given.'”

I had never thought about it that way before. I never looked at Jesus breaking the bread at Passover and made an analogy to my own life.

We are taken (or chosen) by God who loved us from the start. We are blessed by Him with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly realms. We are broken by our own sin and the broken and marred world we live in with so much poverty, injustice, and inhumanity. We are given to be God’s hands and feet to bring healing and justice and compassion into the world.

I read somewhere that my life is loaves and fishes. Remember the ones that Jesus used to feed the 5,000? In and of myself, I can’t do much. But if I am blessed and broken and poured out, God can bless so many more through me.

News flash: God takes and uses broken lives, scarred hearts, screwed-up pasts, and promises left unfulfilled. He can use anybody. In fact, He more often than not prefers the outcasts and nobodies and failures to be the ones to turn the world upside down (see the 12 disciples for examples).

Lord, may I be taken by You, Who chose me before I was born and gave me the name Beloved, and blessed with as much of You as I can stand. Break my heart for the things that break Yours and then give me out to those in need.

PS The book I’m reading is Life of the Beloved. Expect more blogs to come out of this. I’m not even halfway through. And, to throw in yet another shameless plug, go buy or download or pilfer or ingest this book as soon as humanly possible. It’s that good.

The Pretender (Not Just a Great Song by Jackson Browne Anymore)

Ok, I’m going to ask you a question and I want you to be as honest as possible. Here goes. Have you ever felt like you were pulling the wool over everybodys’ eyes, where they thought you had it all together and you really deep down inside felt like you had no control over anything and no clue whatsoever? Raise your hand if you have.

I know it feels dorky to be sitting alone in front of your computer monitor (or laptop) in the dark with your hand raised, but do it anyway. I just did. I felt really good (and a little bit awkward, too).

You are not alone if you feel like you are fooling everyone.

You are not alone if you feel like you’re pretending to be successful when you feel like you’re failing at every possible turn and messing up everything.

You’re not alone if you walk around with a grown-up exterior, but still feel like a scared little 1o-year old, still afraid of the same things and still believing the same lies you believed back then.

You are not alone if you have a fear deep down inside that someone will see though your saintly Christianity and expose all those sordid and angry thoughts you keep hidden inside.

You won’t be alone because I’ve been there, too. That makes two of us. And I would bet money that there’s more (but I’m Baptist, so I don’t believe in betting real money. Betting Monopoly money is OK in my translation of the Bible, though).

God knows. God sees all the fear and the anger. He sees what’s behind the curtain and what’s beneath the mask. He know your mess better than you do. And the real kicker? He loves you more than you could possibly imagine.

I heard someone say that Jesus didn’t come to accuse or condemn you, but to love you and transform you.

That’s good news. That’s worth being real and honest.

Bedtime thoughts

Jesus said, “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments” (Matthew 22:37-40).

That’s it. Love God and love others.

But for you to love God, you have to know the reality that God already loves you. For you to love others as yourself, you have to love yourself. Ultimately, you can’t do it. Well, I will only speak for myself here and say that I can’t love God or anybody else, even me, on my own strength. I need Jesus in me, pouring out His agape love, or else I am empty and cold and love-less.

Sometimes, God calls you to love yourself as you love your neighbor. Sometimes, it’s easier to love someone else than to love that person you hang around with every minute of every day. That person who looks back at you in the mirror with accusing eyes that speak of all the impure thoughts, mixed motives, and selfish ambition.

That’s when you and I have to believe what God says about who we are over what we see and think and feel. As a friend of mine told me once, “What you think and feel will lie to you.” But God never will.

God is true. God is love. And God loves you.

And you have all the power of Christ that overcame the grave in you. You have His perfect righteousness that covers your own wretched self-righteous rags of filth.

So be free to love. Love God, love others and love you.

As always, I believe. Help my unbelief.