Mr. Irrelevant

Today, I watched the last few rounds of the NFL draft. I know for some of you that sounds as exciting as watching paint dry or grass grow. But it was an interesting experience, nonetheless.

There’s a new tradition where the last player picked in the draft is deemed Mr. Irrelevant and bestowed with many mock honors in a week-long celebration. I realize that it’s all in fun and not to be taken overly seriously, but it got me thinking.

Have you ever felt irrelevant? Like you don’t matter?

Have you ever been through the process of looking for a job and been to interview after interview, only to be told a variation of, “We’re sorry, but we’ve decided to go with another candidate”?

Have you been at home reading about all the fun exploits everybody else is posting about on facebook and felt uninvited and unwanted?

Did you know that the God of the Universe would have sent Jesus to the cross if you had been the only one who needed saving? Do you realize that God chose you not out of some cosmic sense of obligation, but because he actually and truly wanted you?

I have trouble believing it sometimes, but it’s true. I think Max Lucado said that Jesus would rather go through hell for me than go back to heaven without me. That means that I matter. That means that you matter.

Don’t ever let anybody make you feel like you’re unwanted. Don’t ever let anyone tell you that you don’t matter. You’re wanted and you matter.

I may have already said something like this before, but I don’t care. I’ll keep repeating the same truths over and over until you and I both fully grasp that God is crazy in love with us and desires for us to know him more than anything.

So you see there really are no Mr. Irrelevants after all.

Me Too

I think that sometimes the most powerful words you can ever say or hear from a friend are, “Me too.”

It means that you’re not alone in your struggle. In your fear. In your doubt.

It means that at least one person knows what you’re going through and you’re not the freakish weirdo out of the whole human race who has your particular issue.

It means that two are more of you are gathered together and that’s where God really shows up.

When I heard a speaker say that he fears when people find out what he’s really like, they will abandon him, I said in my heart, “Me too.” He had named my fear almost verbatim the way I would have named it.

That was comforting. To know that a well-known speaker has the same fear I do was good to know, but that another human being shares that phobia meant the world to me.

So remember you’re not alone in your struggle. You are not a freak of nature. Others are walking the same road that you are, even though you may feel like the only one.

There’s a website called nomorevoices.com where you can name what the voices are telling you. The only response will be, “Me too.”

So remember when you’re in the depth of your struggles that you are not alone. Others are in the same place you are.

And most of all, God knows.

 

It’s Time To Play “Name That Fear”

I have an image in my mind of that old TV game show where the contestants were constantly yelling, “Big bucks! Big bucks! No whammies!”

It’s time for me to name one of my fears, that big ol’ ugly whammy that has always gotten to me– the fear of abandonment.

I’m putting this out there so that 1) it will lose its power over me and 2) so that you can be brave enough to name your own fear and diminish its power over you. So here goes.

My fear is the fear of abandonment. I’m afraid that you will get to know me and then decide that I’m not worth the effort, that I’m really too messed up for you to deal with, and you will go away.

I go through long stretches where I am good and that fear isn’t a problem. But then someone won’t respond to a text or will stop commenting on and liking my facebook posts and that old fear creeps up. That voice says, “See? They’ve given up on you” or “They’re gradually pulling away from you and pretty soon won’t have anything to do with you.”

Or maybe I’m at a social event and a friend isn’t as friendly as usual and I wonder if I’ve done or said something to offend them. I fantasize in my mind how they’re really angry with me and are just waiting for the right moment to tell me where I can go and what I can do with myself (putting it nicely). I’ve actually played out those scenarios to the point where I’ve thought a friendship was over when it wasn’t even close to being over.

Sometimes you can recognize a lie and believe it anyway because it’s familiar. It’s all you’ve known and lived with your whole life. But when you name it and where it came from, it loses its power over you.

So, I name that fear of abandonment from the pit of hell and I claim the blood of Jesus over it right now. I receive my status as the beloved of God, chosen by Jesus.

Now if I could just hit some of those big bucks. . .

All Those Voices and The Truth

Maybe you’re like me. Sometimes maybe you get so many voices in your head, it’s hard to tell which ones are genuine and which ones are not. It’s hard to discern your own thoughts from the legion running through your mind.

I firmly believe that one of the enemy’s tricks is to plant thoughts in your mind and make you believe that those are your thoughts. He can take a little bit of the truth, just enough to make it plausible, and mix it with a lie. Kinda like a fisherman baits a hook with enough of a tempting lure to make the fish bite.

I’ve been overwhelmed at times and not known what to believe or which voices to trust. But I’ve come to realize that in those times it’s better to not trust what I think or what I feel, but what I know. That is, what God has revealed to me about himself time and time again.

I know he’s good. I know he’s strong. I know he’s for me. I know he won’t give up on me.

Many times, I’ve fallen back on those truths when the lies seem so very easy to believe. When the old fears of abandonment seem to be coming true before my very eyes and I feel more alone than ever, I have to remember that God is with me.

You never know what you believe until it’s a matter of life or death, when your survival and your sanity depend on it. You never know how strong and good God is until you’re lost and he’s the only one who can find you, when you’re sinking in despair and he’s the only one who can rescue you.

Devils and lies die in the light. They can’t survive when confronted with the very truth of God’s word. So name the lies for what they are. Name where they came from. And declare out loud that Jesus has already defeated that enemy and those lies once and for all.

Most of all, let’s hold each other up in prayer and be strong for those when they can’t be strong for themselves, and believe for those when their faith is too weak. It just takes two or three.

Remember that the Truth as personified in Jesus isn’t just another voice in your head. It’s the Voice that bids all other voices be still the way it bidded the waves to be still. It’s the Voice that will always have the last word.

 

Immanuel: For All Those Times

Immanuel is God with us, in the flesh, walking alongside of us, sharing our burdens and joys and sorrows, even now. The Kingdom of God isn’t just some faraway pie-in-the-sky somewhere-over-the-rainbow place for when we die, it’s the presence of God in our midst at this very moment.

For when you’re at a party and you feel alone in the crowd, unnoticed and unwanted, Jesus is there with you.

For when you’re interested in someone and just realized that they aren’t the least bit interested in you in the same way (and probably never will be), Jesus knows what you’re feeling.

For when you feel like you’re not that high up on anybody’s priority list and they’d probably rather be hanging out with their cooler, artsier friends than you, Jesus chose you because he wanted you, not because you were all that was left. He picked you.

For when you’re in a season of trial and your friends seem to be growing more distant and less friendly, Jesus is still the friend who sticks closer than a brother. You realize that they’re too busy dealing with their own pain to fully notice yours and know the same Jesus who is with you in your pain is with them in theirs.

For when you have a story to tell but no one is listening and no one seems to want to hear it at all, Jesus, the one who wrote your story and knows it by heart, is listening.

For when you’ve come to the absolute end of your rope and have completely run out of hope, Jesus is right in front of you, saying “Just take one more step toward me. Just give me the tiniest bit of what’s left of your faith, and I’ll get you through.”

For when you can’t tell the lies and fears from reality, when you know what you’re thinking isn’t true or even sane but think it anyway, Jesus is still the Life, the Truth, and the Way. He’s still your life, your ultimate truth, and the way for you to get back home.

You’ll find one day that you can be in a group and not have to have the attention all the time.

You’ll find one day that when that someone you’re interested in finds their true love, you can sincerely rejoice for them.

You’ll find one day that the place God brings you to was worth all he brought you through and you’d go through all of it again to be at this amazing new place.

You’ll find one day that you can’t hear the lies anymore and the fears disappear as you grow in God’s love and learn to hear his still small voice speaking to you.

Even then, he is still Immanuel. God with us. God with me. God with you.

“But We Had Hoped . . . “

despair

“And we had our hopes up that he was the One, the One about to deliver Israel” (Luke 24:21).

I know you know what it’s like to have your hopes dashed yet again.

Maybe you thought a certain person was the one, but it turned out that he wasn’t interested in you like that or she only wanted to be friends.

Maybe you invested in a friendship and found out that you weren’t nearly as high on the other person’s list of priorities. Or maybe that other person saw some of your flaws and decided you just weren’t worth the effort anymore.

Maybe you felt confident after a really good job interview only to discover the company went with someone else they felt was a “better fit.”

Maybe you gave your time and energy and talent to a company for so many years only to find yourself on the receiving end of a pink slip with the words that went something like “we had to make some cutbacks somewhere.”

Maybe you’re at the place where it’s easier not to hope anymore. Where it’s easier not to open up to anyone or trust anyone beyond a surface level anymore. Where it’s easier and safer to give up on your dreams than risk the possibility of more disappointment and heartache.

Just like those two disciples, maybe you and I have gotten so wrapped up in ourselves that we miss who it is that’s walking alongside of us. We’ve missed his comforting words. Don’t you see him yet?

It’s Jesus.

I love what I heard a pastor say recently that went something like this: “Aren’t you glad that at the greatest hour of need that God didn’t send a text or a skype invite? He sent Jesus.”

Jesus has come to hear your story and then connect it with his. Not that he’ll be surprised by anything you tell him. He already knows what you’ve been through, even the ugly parts you would never tell another living soul. And he loves you.

He’ll stick around when friends bail, when spouses leave, when children don’t want to come around anymore. He’ll love you even when you can’t find the strength to love yourself.

Tonight, I’m more thankful for Jesus than ever. I know that when I’m feeling overwhelmed by negative thinking and feelings of abandonment, he’s speaking peace into my chaos. He’s whispering truth over the lies I’m believing.

And he won’t ever leave me.

Another Easter Toast (But This One’s All Mine)

toast

I raise my glass and drink to all the losers, drop-outs, failures, rejects, and nobodies. I drink to all the castaways, the worthless, the reprobates, the down-and-outers, and anybody who just can’t seem to get their act together. To all the crooks and whores and drunks and junkies and thieves.

Why?

You are the ones Jesus died for. He himself said he came not for those who were well, those who were righteous, but for you, the sick, the sinner, the wretched, blind, and poor. Those without a hope left in the world.

Blessed are you for you have found hope.

Blessed are you for you have been made new. The past no longer counts against you and the future is yours.

Blessed are you for God so loved you that he gave his only Son that you should not perish but have full, abundant, and rich eternal life, starting now.

Blessed are you when you’ve reached the end of your rope, as one translation puts it, because there is less of you and more of God and his rule.

Blessed are you when you cry out to God and beg for pardon for all your mistakes and failures and sins and find that forgiveness and freedom is sweeter and grander and longer and wider than you ever imagined they could be.

I toast you because you really appreciate what this day is all about. You know that because of this day you are alive and free from any condemnation. Because of Easter Sunday, you no longer have to let your past define you or your future.

You have an Advocate, a Redeemer, a Savior, a Friend and a Father. You have a new name, a new start, a new tomorrow, and a new destiny.

I think that merits a toast, don’t you?

triple wine toast

Storms

This is like one of those albums you buy where there’s a disclaimer that reads something like “all songs previously released. In other words, I’m not saying anything new.

I heard recently that there are three kinds of people: those in a storm, those coming out of a storm, and those fixin’ to get ready (as we say in the South) to head into a storm.

No one is exempt. Storms come to the just and the unjust, to the houses built on solid foundations as well as those built on sand.
What matters in a storm is being ready, because when the time comes, you won’t have time to get ready. You’ll have to be ready.

What does being ready look like?
I think it means you have Jesus in your boat.

I’m pretty sure when my storm comes I’ll be freaking out like the disciples did and telling Jesus to wake up so we can die together.

But Jesus has a way of speaking peace over the storms. And even when he doesn’t calm the storm, he calms his child in the storm.

I’d like to take credit for all that, but it’s not original to me. I’ve heard or read it all before. But these blogs are often reminders for me as much as they are for you.

So I can take credit for about two percent of this blog. It’s a good thing I’m not having to use footnotes.

Just remember he who is in you is greater than whatever’s out there, including storms.

Even the Lone Ranger Had Tonto, Right?

I hate watching nature shows that come on Discovery or the Animal Planet. There. It’s out there. I admit it for the whole blogging world to know.

The part I hate is when a cheetah or a lion separates a gazelle from the herd and. . . well, I can’t bring myself to describe it.

You feel bad for the gazelle, starting off the day with such high hopes and ending up on someone else’s dinner menu. Not the best way to go.

But I think about how so many believers do the very same thing. We allow ourselves to get cut off from fellow Christians, to get isolated with no one to keep us accountable or hold us in check. We have no one to offer empathy and encouragement. Then we fall.

The trick of the enemy is to get us alone. He knows that whenever two or more are gathered together he has no chance, but when he gets one of them alone, his odds go up dramatically.

You know the drill, right? Either you get cocky and think you don’t need anyone else or you get embarrassed at how low you’ve sunk and can’t bear to let anyone see you like this. Or maybe you think no one really cares so why bother?

I’ve believed all of these lies at least once at some point and I bet you have, too, because sometimes the lies just feel easier to accept. The truth is hard when it goes against what we feel to be true.

You and I both need someone in our corner to encourage and stir us on. We also need that one person who has permission to ask the hard questions and steer us back when we’ve drifted off course.

No man is an island, as the saying goes. There is no such thing as Lone Ranger Christianity (at least not any that I’ve found in the Bible). And didn’t even the Lone Ranger at least have Tonto (not to mention his trusty horse)?

Remembering When You Were Lost

forkintheroad

I fondly remember my years as a Boy Scout. For the most part. I paid my dues, aquired my merit badges, and eventually attained the rank of Eagle Scout, one month shy of my 18th birthday. Then there was that one time when I got lost at Boy Scout Camp.

I know what you’re thinking. Aren’t Boy Scouts supposed to be really good at directions and reading compasses and finding their way around? Not me. I am both directionally-challenged and compass-deprived.

I just remember the hopeless feeling of not knowing where I was or how to get back to where I wanted to be. I can think of few times in my life when I felt as helpless and terrified as I did in that moment.

I think a lot of people are spending their lives like that. They don’t know where they are in life or where they’re going, but they know for sure it isn’t where they want to be. They’re lost and scared that they’ll never be found.

I’m thankful God isn’t one to wait around for us to finally get our acts together and start heading in the right direction. Before you and I knew we needed help, God already was down here looking for us. We were as important as the lost sheep, the lost coin, and the lost son in the eyes of God and he went to extravagant lengths to find us and rescue us.

Maybe you remember what you were like before Jesus changed you. I know I’ve seen enough glimpses of what I could have been without Jesus to be immensely grateful for what he’s done in my life. I am reminded every day that no one is better than God at finding those who are lost and bringing them home. He won’t ever give up at any point seeking his lost sheep and lost sons until he brings every last one of them home.

That’s what I love about God.

By the way, my Scout troop found me and brought me back to camp. I probably lost my Scout-cred for good that day, but I didn’t care. I was just glad to be found again.