This is a bit of a departure for me. Normally, I write about deep spiritual matters or frivolous feline facts. I write about good books that I have read or good movies that I’ve seen. But not now.

I come to you, my good readers, with a request. I am in need of one tacky Christmas sweater, pronto. I cannot emphasize enough the tacky part. It needs to be TACKY.

LOUD colors would be a plus. Also, any kind of bells or lights or anything that makes festive noises or is just obnoxiously cheerful. It must be a size Large and I prefer if it’s a men’s sweater.

If you need help visualizing what I’m looking for, check out the picture I’ve inserted at the top of this blog. When I wear this bad boy, I want to be seen from a mile away and I want there to be no mistake about what kind of tacky sweater I’m wearing. Although I’m fairly certain there are no tacky sweaters for the other major holidays.

There is no redeeming spiritual or intellectual value to this blog. It’s kinda like verbal cotton candy. Every now and then, you need cotton candy to make you feel better, even though it has no actual food ingredients that I’m aware of.

Donations are also welcome. I take American Express, Visa, Mastercard, cash, checks, or any other kind of legal tender (except for Confederate or Canadian money).

That is all. Carry on about your normal Saturday business as usual.

And this blog will self-destruct in 5 seconds (just kidding).

PS The world won’t cease to exist if I don’t get my tacky Christmas sweater, but if you have one or know of one, let me know. Contact me at GMendel72@united.net for further instructions.

PPS Thanks in advance.