Jesus, You are faithful always. You are true always. You are good always. And You are for me and with me always.

I can’t imagine what I would have done today without You there to calm me down. Sitting in my car, looking down at a gas guage reading E for empty, having to pee like Seabiscuit, seeing the low battery on my cell phone, and wondering if my tires would be able to handle all the ice, I found You to be faithful.

Like the song says, You calm my raging sea. When I am in full-on anxiety and overanalytical mode, You step into my maelstrom and speak to the wind and waves, bidding them be still. You speak to my racing heart and bid it to beat normally. You speak to my fears and bid them depart. You speak to my anxious thoughts and they turn to thoughts of You.

Thank You that when nothing goes my way, that when my plans blow up in my face, when my hopes get obliterated beyond recognition, You are still there, holding me like a child and comforting me. You remind me that what I was really looking for all the time in all those things was You. You remind me that You are my best plan, my true hope and– above all– THE WAY.

I feel my weakness keenly tonight. My tendancy is still to default to panic mode and to try to make my own plans work for the 100th time, even after the other 99 times have been fiascos of epic proportion

But You said Your power is made perfect in my weakness. You said that is when You show up best. So I am thankful for my weaknesses, because they remind me that I need You for every breath, every heartbeat, every step and every moment.

Here at Your altar, I come and lay down, ready to die. Do whatever You want with me for Your kindom purposes and Your glory. I am all Yours. Have Your complete way in me, even if that means my hopes for marriage die and my dreams of success fail. What I want, what I really want, is You.

Amen and amen!